I have a secret.

 

 

I like him.

 

 

But who cares?

 

 

He doesn't see me that way.

 

 

He doesn't see me. PERIOD.

 

 

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I can see him smiling. Oh God how I love how he smiles. That bright smile that can light up my day. I can't just get enough of it. How his eyes disappears and dimples showing on both of his cheeks. His laughter full of mystery, which attracts me more. Wanting more.

 

 

His dark brown eyes holds secrets. Full of love. Filled with life.

 

 

I wish he will see me. I wish he won't.

 

 

I want to know if he also notices me. I don't want to get caught looking.

 

 

But most of all.

 

 

I don't wannt to be seen. For him to know that I care. Too much maybe. But still.

 

 

I'm scared.

 

 

Scared to be rejected. To be avoided. To be speculated. To look weak. To look pathetic. To look like a fool.

 

 

So, again I stand by the side. Blending in the crowd. Waiting and wondering for the day to be finally known.

 

 

Nothing. I decided to give up. This is hopeless, my brain said.

 

 

Days passed. Weeks, months, and he can never see.

 

 

I was moving on. I thought I've already forgotten. Moved on from his grasp.

 

 

But why is fate so cruel to me?

 

 

The time I realize I don't need him. I can live without his attention. He finally looked by his side and stared at my wondering eyes.

 

 

Why?Why now?

 

 

I don't know.

 

 

All I know is that I am turning around. Slowly falling back from his hold. His deep brown eyes.

 

 

I am falling harder. Deeper and I'm scared sh*tless.

 

 

He told me to become friends. I coudn't say no.

 

 

We're always together now. He's becoming a part of my everyday pattern: exchanging messages and phone calls, eating lunch, hainging out during the week ends....

 

 

But the best moments were the long talks about our problems, about our lives. When he plays the guitar and sings me lullaby to sleep. When he tries to be funny when I'm down. He tells me I'm beautiful when I feel like crap. He cooks me spaghetti and buys me an ice cream when I demand him to. And I like the most when he told me that he prefers to be with me instead of his circle of friends.

 

He calls me his soul mate. I secretely called him mine.

 

 

I told myself, At last, I may have a chance with him.

 

 

I coudn't sleep for nights, but that's okay, the day's are compensated by seeing him.

 

 

I talk about him too much to my best friends. I told them that I am finally happy with him. That he and I might have a chance to be together.

 

 

But as I've told you. Fate is CRUEL.

 

 

We we're hainging out in his house, watching his favorite movie side by side. He leaned forward to me and smiled. My heart beat tripled. I held my breath praying that he will finally say that he likes me. Or better yet that he loves me.

 

 

"Dara, I'm inlove." Jiyong confessed.

 

 

I gasped. Couldn't speak at the moment, trying to figure how to respond to his confession.

 

 

"Who?"  Me?. I silently prayed so.

 

 

Then he smiled his most beautiful smile. Where his dimples show. I recognize it in his face, his eyes.

 

 

He answered, "To the most beautiful girl I laid my eyes on. She just took my breath away. When I look at her, she's the only one that I can see. She brought out different kind of emotions in me. She agrivates me everytime I can't see her, everytime she talks to other guys other than me. She's the reason why I started playing my guitar again. She makes me dream of her smile, seeing it everyday for the rest of my life. I need her. I love her. But I don't know what to do. How to say this to her. I don't want to scare her away."

 

 

By now, I feel like I'm going to have a seisure. I feel like flying. My dream coming true. I love him so much.

 

 

This is it, I told myself.

 

 

 

I was about to tell him that I feel the same way, but the next words that came out of his mouth crushed my ever living dream, my heart.

 

 

"I'm inlove with Chaerin, Dara-ah."

 

 

 

CL, my best friend.

 

 

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Anneyong yeorobun.... :) I'm back, but with a very short one-shot. I just felt like writing one. It's based on the stories of frend zoned people. (aka me T-T)

Anyway, I just feel down after I saw GD's OOAK last concert with CL. I don't hater her, but I'm a hardcore DARAGON so it broke my heart. huhuhu. But I will still try to stay positive. ^.~