I'm waiting him to wake up. I miss his voice, his smile, a lot. I hold his hands, cold. I'm looking at his face, pale. I'm looking at his body, skinny. Different. Different, it's not like him when we first met 4 years ago. Since he coming to this place, he lose many weight. If you see him now, you will think "he looks very weak", but I knew he was strong, he wasn't weak as his physical, I know it.

I hold his hand and his palm with my thumb, while my other hands his hair.

I don't want him to leave me alone in this world. I can't live without him. He is like oxygen, sun, stars, and moon to me. You just can't live without oxygen that help you breathing on this world. You need sun, stars, and moon that brighten this world in a day, in a night. I want him to back to his old normal/daily life. I want to see him singing full of happiness, laughing because of my bingu side and stupid joke. His voice, the voice of his laughing is like a music to my ear, my heart. That's why I want to see him live full of happiness, not laying on this bed from month to the month, from year to the year.

I his cheek with my thumb when he open his eyes. I want talk to him, I want to tell him how I miss him so much not seeing him just for 8 hours, I have so many stories to tell him that I want him to hear my stories, but I know he still weak from the surgery.

"Did wake you from your sleep?" He smiled to me and shook his head. I smiled back to him. Even with that pale skin, he still look so beautiful. I his hair again and he closed his eyes. I can't stop smiling, every move he do can easily make me smile, he is truly an angel. He open his eyes when I stop his hair.

"Seunghyun?"

"Hmm?"

"Can we go out for awhile?" He looked out the windows. I shook my head.

"Seunghyun~" he whined and pouting. I pinch his cheek, he know my weakness, he know if he make that face I can't say 'No' to him.

"Dae, you know what doctor said right? You can't go to outside when is night, the wind can make you sick."

"I want to feel it, I want to feel the weather. Please??" That's it. I'm lose. I can't say no to him.

"But you must wear jacket, okay?" I took of my jacket and wear it to him. He hugged me when I'm finish helping him wearing the jacket to say thank you.

"Thank you Seunghyun. They said tonight there'll be a shooting star. I wanna see it and make a wish."

"Silly Daesungie" he chuckles. I helped him to sit on the edge of the bed. Until now, he still believe about things like that. He still believes that Santa will come to your house with a tons of present if you become a good girl/boy for 1 year. You will think it silly right?? But, that's his charms, that's make me fall for him.

I said to him I will take a wheelchair and he shook his head and want me to piggy back him. I crouched in front of him so that he could go up to my back easily. Once I felt he was on my back, I began to stand up and he put his now skinny hands around my neck. I began to walking to the park that located on the roof of this hospital building.

I put him down in front of one of the bench, when we arrive there. I helped him to sit and zipped the jacket so he can't get a cold.

I sitting next to him, he put his head on my shoulders and I put my arms around his waist. I could smell the fragrance of his shampoo. I kiss his head then looked at the sky.

After sitting in there and watching the sky (and sometimes doing lovey-dovey stuff) for almost like one and half an hours, the first shooting stars showing up. "Let's make a wish Seunghyun." He said and linked his fingers and closed his eyes, praying. I looked at him and then back to the sky where now hundreds of shooting stars across the sky and dissapeared thereafter.

I began to linked my finger and close my eyes. For now, for this time, and for the first time that shooting stars can listen to my wish and make it happen.

"I wish Seunghyun can find someone better than me, when I die later."

"I wish Daesung will be with me. Forever"

 

*****

 

On my left hand I have his favorite chocolate and a bouquet of flowers. On my right hand I have his favorite figure of Japan cartoon;Doraemon. Today is his birthday, I need to make him happy. I pick up a call from my mother when doctors and nurse ran to his room. I began to get nervous and scared. What happened to my Daesungie? Did something bad happen to him? What if my Daesungie leave me in this world alone? NO! He can't leave me now. I'm not ready to lose him.

I started running to his room when I felt that something bad happen to Daesung, leave the gift laying on the floor. I don't care about the gift. I just care about my Daesung.

I followed the doctors and nurse that were pushing his bed to surgery room. His face, he looks really pale. Tears started rolling down my cheek, all memories with from the beginning we met all spinning in my mind, and I can't stop thinking about the worst, losing him. Losing my sun, star, moon and oxygen.

The surgery doors closed.

3 hours

5 hours

7 hours

No one doctors out from the surgery room.

9 hours

11 hours

13 hours

Finally one of the doctors get out from the operating room. I ran to him, asking about my Daesungie condition.

"The surgery went well and he's okay you can see him when we move him back to his room. But, I have a bad news...."

 

*****

 

I approached him who was sitting on a bench behind our house. I hugged him from behind and kissed his cheek. "Already home?" He asking me with his sweet tone, I nodded. He put his hand on my head, my hair slowly. I love the sensation, his delicate hand that my head, scented of soap and shampoo that he use tickle my nose. I pulled back and kissed his cheek before I say to him that I was going to take a bath and change clothes and will be right back to stay with watching the night sky.

After taking a bath I changed to the black tuxedo and grabbed the bouquet of flowers and a small box uphostered in a blue velvet. His favorite colour.

I walked to him who was still sitting in there. "Dae, don't look at back and close your eyes." I said from behind him, make him surprised.

"Seunghyun?"

"Yeah Daesungie?"

"What are you doing? Why you want me to close my eyes?"

"Just close you eyes okay? Don't open your eyes until I say so." He hummed as the answer. I squint a little to make sure he has completely close his eyes. I walked to the front, put the bouquet of flowers on his lap. I knelt in from of him, holding the small box.

"Open your eyes." I said and he opened his eyes slowly. He looked at me with a puzzled look.

"Dae, we've lived together for a long time, and you know I love you so much and can't live without you.."

"Seunghyun, you can find someone better than me. I'll make your life miserable."

"Dae, you never make my life miserable."

"You know that Seunghyun. I can't walk anymore, I would be a burden for you."

"Dae, look at me and listen to me. You're here with me, I don't care about your physical. If you can't walk anymore, I will be your legs. If you can't see anymore, I will be your eyes. I don't care about your physical, you're still with me here, still by my side. I want you to never leave me alone..."

"Seunghyun..."

"Dae, I will ask you this question.." I opened the small box, revealing a beautiful ring on it. "Kang Daesung, will you be my sun in my day, my moon in my night, my partner in the rest of my life?"

"Seunghyun.."

"It's okay, just answer it."

"Seunghyun.... Yes I will." I can't help not to smile. I'm so happy. I put the ring on his finger and hug him.

"Thank you Dae-ah. I love you Dae-ah... Always"

"I love you too.. Always"

 

THE END

 

Hope you enjoy ~