Trees, flowers, cars all seemed to flash before your eyes as you rested your head on the window. Tears streaming down your face as you watched children play with their parents like you used to. All of the memories filled your mind as the miles dragged on until you reached your brother’s quaint abode.

His apartment was small but nothing to be ashamed of. He offered you the smaller guest bedroom as he helped you carry in your luggage. You started to unpack as reality hit you. You pushed everything off of your bed and punched your pillows with rage; you tired out quickly and soon just fell to the floor and cried.

—

Dongwoon emerged out of the shower with the towel hanging around his neck. His evergreen wife beater and black sweats were hugging to him tightly as he came out of the bedroom. The wonderful smell of food hit him like a ton of bricks. He trotted into the kitchen where all of the hyungs were waiting for him. Kate was all dressed in her large pink shirt that fit like a small dress. A smile illuminated on Dongwoon’s face as he walked over to see that they had made Udon for him.

“Thank you hyungs” Dongwoon said as he sat down around the table and everyone else followed.

“Anything for our maknae” Doojoon said as they all dug in. Dongwoon finished early and fed Kate as well.

“Who’s up to doing the dishes?” Doojoon proposed as Dongwoon got up first. Dongwoon’s phone rang and Dongwoon handed Kate off to Junhyun.

“I’ll do the dishes” Junyhyun said as he handed the baby to Doojoon

“I’ll help” Doojoon said as he handed the baby to Kikwang

“I got Kate!” Kikwang smiled and raised Kate up in the air as she on her fingers

“Me too!” Yoseob called as he played with her fingers

—

“Dongwoon?” You cried once again once you heard him pick up the phone

“Yeah babe?” Dongwoon walked back to his room and paced as you paused trying to find the right words, “What’s wrong, ________?”

“They’re gone” You broke down crying once again, Dongwoon was devastated he leaned against the wall looking out the window, knocking his head back resting it on the wall behind him. He slid down the wall as he rested his arm on his knee.

“I am so sorry” Dongwoon’s voice started to crack as tears came into his eyes as he heard you cry harder on the other line. Both of you just sat in silence a while crying to each other on the other line.

“I-I will have to s-stay a couple w-weeks more for the f-funeral” You said as you gasped for air

“I will wait for you jagi” Dongwoon’s voice came into yours as you calmed yourself down. He was singing to you, his soft, emotion filled voice soothed you as you listed to the harmonious notes that he sang, you listened to the words as you realized that it was one of your favorite childhood songs. You began to sing along softly as tears streamed down your cheeks. When you both finished your childhood song he started right into the song that he confessed to you with, then your wedding song, then your daughter’s lullaby and finally the new song that he had just learned today.

You both ended the call in tears as you were thankful for Dongwoon’s comfort gift that he had sung to you.

—

Dongwoon walked out of the room clearing his eyes from the tears that he had shed while he was singing to you. He walked out to see all of the hyungs in front of the TV watching a movie. Kate was fast asleep in Yoseob’s arms. Dongwoon walked over and held his daughter in his arms as he moved back into her room. He placed her in her crib and sat in the rocking chair facing her small, peaceful, perfect body as he looked through the pictures on his phone.

The darkness fell upon the room as the movie ended and the hyungs fell asleep in the living room. Dongwoon woke up to a crying Kate as he walked over and gently lifted her out of her crib. He rubbed the tears from her eyes as he walked into the kitchen and prepared a warm bottle for her. He watched as his hyungs were sleeping on each other and all over the furniture. Dongwoon grabbed a snack for himself as he placed the bottle in Kate’s mouth.

“I am sorry that you only have one grandpa and grandma now, Kate. I am sorry that you have to come to work with me for a couple more weeks. I am sorry that the hyungs are taking care of you because I need help. I am sorry that I am a horrible Appa and that I barely know how to take care of you. I am sorry that you have to deal with me until Umma comes back. I am sorry that I don’t do a good job like Umma does. I am sorry that I can’t spend more time with you. I am sorry Kate” Dongwoon gently talked to her as she finished her bottle and fell asleep as he watched the moon.

——