She called me again. For the third time, she wanted to see me. I told her to meet me up in a resto nearby. I saw her standing alone in front of the resto with a red umbrella. It's still raining and I know she's cold because she was shivering. I went near her, "Why are you bothering me?". She closed her umbrella as she bend her haid down. "I m-miss y-you", she said with a shaking voice."Let's go. I'll ta​ke you home", I answered directly to avoid the awkward atmosphere and then leave. She did not open up her umbrella, I knew she wanted to share mine. After a while, she realized that I was leaving her in her spot . She ran towards me and grabbed my hand, "I'm starving, can we eat first?". "NO!", I yelled at her. She looked really disappointed , "Please, just take me now to the train station". She looked at me with a small smile in her face.

          When we reached the train station, it was already crowded with people bringing their umbrellas with them. They looked really eager to go home, not caring about other people who passed by but we still waited for the train. She looked at me innocently. Being together for so long, of course I knew what she meant. I understand what she felt. She went here to see me even though the weather was really bad yet I still treated her like this. With her soft eyes staring at me, I felt guilt and wanted to let her stay with me for the rest of the night. But reality strucks again, I said to her coldly... "Let's try other train station".

          We live in the same apartment, on the same floor. Back then were four of us, and we got along well. We ate dinner together, watched movies and sometimes we went camping. We are like a family but I didn't know I would end up falling in love with the only girl of us four.

          We are walking beside the street, she's infront of me. She was really thinking deep that she was nearly hit by a car. I wanted to hug her with the love I had for her but because of the constant pain in my stomach, I did nothing.

          We passed through a park, where we always spend time together. "Can we stop for a while? Please just a little time and I promise to go home after this.", she said using her aegyo that I can't resist. So I just nodded and pretended not to care at all. With an annoyed face, I sat in a bench; acting that I really wanted to go home. She did not noticed my actions 'cause she went directly to a big oak tree like she was looking for something. I know what she was looking for, we wrote something in that tree with a red marker half a year ago. Minho and Yuri will always remember this day, always loving each other, FOREVER. These words were written in that tree. She was staring at the tree and then she ran towards me with tears on her face. "Minho, I can"t find it! It's not there anymore."  She's now crying hard. I felt so sour inside, there was a stream of pain flowing into my heart; the kind of pain I've never felt before. However, all I can do was to pretend that I didn't care. "Let's go...", I stood up and started to go on my way to take her home.

          Four years ago, the doctor said I had a cancer. It was found early so it was still curable. Thinking that it was okay, I started living my normal life again and even forgot about the cancer, not even going back to the doctor. Until a month ago, I felt severe pain in my stomach which lasted for two weeks. I thought the pain would be completely gone after taking some of my medicines but it became worst. I couldn't take it anymore. I went to the doctor and he let me do a test, the results came out and there was a big black spot inside my stomach. I was at the most glittering part of my life because I have her but now , it was coming to an end. I wanted the people around me to go through the least possible pain, so I decided to commit suicide. On the other hand, I can't let people find out about my intentions especially Yuri, the person I love the most in this whole world, who still doesn't know about the truth. She's still young, she shouldn't have to go through this because of me. That's why I made stories and lied to her, telling her that I don't love her. It was a cruel thing to do and it broke her heart but it was the fastest way to wipe out three years' feelings. And now that I am close to succeeding, this drama would soon be over. Three minutes left and this would all come to an end.

          I called a taxi for her. We were just standing, loosing our last moments in silence. I held back my tears. "Take care of yourself, arasso?", I told her as I open the door of the taxi for her. She just nodded and went inside without saying a word. I was just standing, staring at the black window. I could see her figure, my first love and definitely the last one who was now walking out of my life. The car started driving into the street. Now, I can't hold my tears. I chased after the taxi waving my arms rapidly. Because I knew, this would be the last time I can see her. I wanted to tell her how much I love her, I wanted to let her stay but I couldn't chase the taxi anymore. I was breathing hard. Warm tears kept falling down on my face blended with the cold raindrops. I was cold, not because of the rain; I was cold inside knowing she already left me. I wiped my tears away, put a smile on my face and left without regrets. That was the best thing to do, to make her forget about me, about us. But I'm not Minho, I am that girl Yuri. Using my memory and his diary I found after one year since he left, writing down these LAST WORDS...