Behind those thick, icy fogs, I saw him stood there in a far distance, with his arms out and a mysterious smile. I smiled back at him and started to run towards him. However, the settings dramatically changed, and I found myself in an empty room with three of my children crying. My eyes rapidly examined around the room, but there was no sign of him. Then the warm, salty tears pooled in my eyes and slowly trickled down my cheeks and I tightly hugged my three precious kids.

I woke up, with my whole face literally soaked with my tears. I signed in relief that it was just a dream, since I have promised my friends that I will never cry in front of my kids. I couldn’t believe it had already been two years, since my husband had died, and to see him like that in a dream was sort of scary. I took a cold shower to refresh myself. Then I followed my usual routine.

Woke the kids up, washed them, fed them, changed their clothes and tidied their room. As I was changing Maden’s nappies, Mason leaned on the table opposite me, and thoroughly looked at me and said, “Momma, why are your eyes red? Have you been crying? Did you miss dad?”.

Those unexpected questions just made me shocked, however I kept silence for a split second, then as I was about to say something, the door bell rang. Mavin wildly jumped off the sofa and headed towards the door. Mason followed him. Mavin bounced up and down as he tried to reach the doorknob. But Mason was tall enough so he opened the door as he stuck his tongue out to Mavin. Then they both cheered and shouted in joy,“Annyeong Sungjong Hyung!".

Sungjong was used to this pleasant welcome. He crouched down so he was the same height level as those two, and gently pinched their cheeks and smiled.

“Omo…both of you look even cuter today”, he said while giving them lollipop.

“Aigoooo…Am I always invisible to you guys?” another voice jokingly said.

Both Mason and Mavin turned their eyes on Sungyeol, stuck their tongue out and ran. Sungyeol pretended to run after them.

“Yes ~~~~~-ah looking good today”, Sungyeol said.

“You guys are early today”, I said whilst feeding the milk bottle to Maden.

Sungyeol changed direction and jokingly said “Bye then!”

“Well, we woke up early!” Sungjong managed to say.

Sungyeol came towards you and took Maden off you and held him.

“Sungyeol Hyung”, Maden quietly said.

“Yes baby ~~~ kuchu kuchu kuchu”, Sungyeol spoke in baby voice and started making all those childish faces.

“Anyways…” Sungjong started. “We’re going to eat out today, that’s why we’re here early. Just you, me and Sungyeol, just like the old times". He finished off with a huge grin on his face.

Before he knew what I was going to say, he continued,“L hyung will be here soon and he’ll look after the kids".

*Poor L oppa, he’s always looking after the kids.* I thought.

Then L arrived with his casual black top, black tight jeans, black leather jacket and of course black sunglasses to polish his overall look. I scoffed at him, I was always fascinated by how he can manage to look so attractive, dressed all in black.

“Alright Alright, All eyes OFF me now!” L cooly said and carried Mason on his back, whilst carrying Mavin on his front.

“Oh look who’s here now?”, Sungyeol said to Maden. He pretended to whisper,“It’s the black man, he’s gunna ruin the weather now".

“YAHHH!! Sikuro!”, L shouted across the room.

“hahaha I don’t know why you bothered dressing up cuz you’ll be staying at home with the moons”, Sungyeol said with a smirk.

“No actually I came to look after them, doesn’t mean I can’t take them outside”, L replied.

“~~~~~~~-ah, get ready jigeum palli!”, Sungjong broke off.

 

Me, Sungyeol and Sungjong were having laugh and drinking all evening, making fun of L since he couldn’t join us.  

“YAH YAH! Drink it like this!”, Sungyeol said to us.

“Ahniya, like this…”, I said whilst laughing endlessly.

“Ahh geurom, your husband used to drink…”, Sungjong blurted out.

 “Aishh,YAhh!!!”, Sungyeol screamed down Sungjong’s ear in his high-pitched tone.

“Mian Mian ~~~~~-ah”, He quickly apologized.

“Ahniya, its okay, gwenchana”, I calmly said. “Geonda, I actually saw him today in…”, I said in a very drunken voice. Then I was cut off by Sungyeol. He started to murmur to himself whilst sobbing, sniffing.

“Hyung, I miss hyung, I want to meet hyung, I wonder what he’s doing, I should call hyung…”, the rest of the sentences he said wasn’t intelligible.

Sungjong was the only one that was acting normal. Me and Sungyeol weren’t making any sense as our emotions took over us.

“I’m living a lie…”, Sungyeol lastly said before he passed out.

"You guys drank too much aigooo", Sungjong stated.

It wasn't long, before I passed out.