Unchanged

@5.47PM Monday 31st December

It’s a breezing Monday evening and the sun is setting… She sits on her balcony looking out into the freshness of the countryside. It’s been a while since she came out her, 2 years? 3 maybe? She doesn’t remember, and I don’t think anyone does.

She, with glistening eyes, as the rays of light shone into the orange sky, her eyes shone like her name… Soojung, meaning crystal. But her name is spelt differently, with a K, because she is special, at least that was what everyone used to tell her and she believed them. The beautiful, cold ice princess idol that everyone admired, along with her sister Jessica Jung. She’s always been proud to be Jessica’s sister, after all both of them are pretty and Jessica is in the most famous group in Asia. Been proud of Jessica, been proud of herself, been proud of him, been proud of where they are at now. Always been proud, until lately. He’s been really close to her sister, very close, too close for her liking. He’s supposed to have eyes only for her and stay away from other girls. Noonas, especially.

He, the one with flaming charisma.

He, the one known as noona killer.

He, the one who captures your heart just by looking.

He, the one she loves.

He, the one that loves her. At least that’s what she thinks.

Yes, that one, you’re correct.

The “Mr. Flaming Charisma” of SHINee.

The walking charismatic hazard has been too close with her own sister. He’s made her lose all her proudness and admirable self. She thought, ‘What if he became close to her to be with Sooyeon? Then why did he have to go all the way to take my heart away?, What if my fame is because of Sooyeon? Known as Jessica’s sister. I’ve been blind all this time? Wait… Maybe it’s because of THAT.’ then she finds herself debating ‘No! That’s not it, I became famous because of myself! They wouldn’t have chosen me in f(x) if it wasn’t for my talent! He wouldn’t do that to me right? He’s got better things to do, plus someone like him wouldn’t need a bridge like me to connect himself to noonas. He’s smooth enough. Yes, that’s it he really does love me.’

Then again, why isn’t he here next to her right now? It’s new year. The day of a fresh start of something new. To begin again. A new beginning.

Here she is sitting alone waiting for him with floating hopes of him coming tonight. She did give him hints, she did tell him she’ll be spending the night alone. Her sister has some kind of concert to perform over the new year. Her parents are all the way over in America. Her band mates are with their family, even Victoria and Amber. With that, she’s left alone… Although, with all that she still had the slightest hope that he’ll come to her giving her a surprise like in movies. Seeing her and running to her hugging her tightly. Asking her why she came all the way here and he was looking for him. That he had to go ask her sister where she went and driving all the way here, just for her. This seemed almost impossible though. He’s not romantic. He used to be caring, he used to be lovely, he used to be loveable. Until these past months.

DING DONG,

DING DONG.

The repeated, impatient ringing of the doorbell woke her up from her deep thoughts. Who on earth would be disturbing her right now? Is it him? Is what she thought going to come true?

Ba-thump.

She opens the door to find him.

It is him…

He's panting hard while holding onto the door frame for support. He then looks up at her and greets her with a warm smile. This is like a dream…

The images shattered.

He walks right past her, shoving past her like she did not matter. He went straight to the fridge and got out water, drank out the whole bottle and threw it into the bin, then heading to the cream colored sofa and taking a seat.

She sighs and shuts the door behind her before heading to the sofa where he’s seated. He kicked off his shoes and the television, tuning onto a football match. What a sweet way of how lovers spend their New Year. Nevertheless, she still watched the match patiently, quietly. Leaving her with shock he suddenly turns off the television and sighs desperately. She turns to see those loving eyes staring at her intently waiting for something. Then it hit her, yes she knew that he's waiting for an explanation of why she came out to the countryside alone. “You were busy. I tried telling you this, that I’m going to spend the New Year here.” With a pause she thought of what to say.

Everything she has been thinking went through her head in a flash. “DID YOU EVER LISTEN? NO! ALL YOU DID WAS NOD AND CONTINUE TO TALK TO YOUR NOONAS. I GUESS I WAS JUST SOMETHING TO PLAY WITH WHILE YOU WERE LOOKING FOR AN OLDER GIRL TO TARGET! OH, RIGHT! YOU’RE TARGETTING MY VERY OWN SISTER! EXCUSE ME, I FORGOT. YOU TALK TO HER ALL THE TIME, ignoring me…”

She then softened, “I guess, I was just a break from work. I was just some distraction.” A shimmering tear made its way out of her chocolate brown eyes, sliding down her perfect-shaped cheeks. “I WAS JUST A RE-BOUND FOR YURI UNNIE! FOR THAT SHE DUMPED YOU!” she snapped and let it out, by now her tears were flooding out endlessly.

“Ouch…” the only word he could utter out after she poured her heart out. She’s now a mess, crying silently next to him. Her own words pierced through her own heart and soul. She has nothing left, he was her everything.

After a very long silence he stated calmly, “Remember? That Valentine’s Day when it was raining? While I waited for you like I had nothing better to do in that café? When I was on my phone and received a message from Kibum hyung that you got in a car accident near Dongguk University? That I panicked? That I insanely ran all the way there with only my hoodie covering my face through the rain? Just to make sure that you were alright? When I told you I love you and I would die if you weren’t with me? Do you still remember? Or have you already forgotten?”

The slightly sobbing girl gently nods in respond to his question.

“That hasn’t changed at all. If it were to happen again, I would insanely run into the rain with only my hoodie covering my face just to make sure you are alright. To tell you that without you I can’t live, that I love you. The feelings are unchanged.” He trailed off into something slightly louder than a whisper.

There was not a single sound that she could make. The only thing that escaped was a sweet smile remembering that time, and all the love she felt from him.

He smiled at her, he still remember how it felt with just the thought of losing her. Whatever he did wrong, never again will it repeat.

He didn’t know she could get so jealous. “I never knew you could get so jealous.”

Over her own sister. “Over your own sister.”

She would never date him anyway if he ever broke her sister’s heart. “Sooyeon would never date me anyway if I left you.”

She’ll more like murder him. “I would more likely be murdered.”

He finished the sentence with a light chuckle, whilst she broke into tears harder than before. It seems like he actually wants to date her sister. He got the message and quickly said “No, no not like that, I’ll never steal her from Jinki hyung.” With that said, the crying girl shot her head up from her knees, giving him a confused look.

“Since when?” she simply questioned, tilting her head.

“Last week. They seem really happy together, especially hyung.” He laughed at the image of his hyung proudly telling them he was dating the Jessica of Girls’ Generation.

“I had to go all the way to your sister’s concert to find out where you are. Got mobbed and stalked by fans. They chased after me, and damn this place they don’t let you park with a pass. Had to park outside and run into the building.” Listening to this Soojung felt her tears welling up again.

“I, I’m… Sorry… for shouting… earlier. You tried to find me, even got chased…” Again uncontrollable tears come out of her eyes. She didn’t know what do to except jump onto Minho and give him a warm bear-hug full of love. Although, it’s more like her hugging a bear.

He patted her head gently and buried his nose into her hair. “I’m also sorry for ignoring you. I thought it’ll be good if I’m actually in a good relationship with your only sibling. But I didn’t know that it seemed that I was well… according to you targeting her…” he muffled into her hair still hugging her tightly.

She looked up at him and smiled, assuring him that she understands. A heart-flattering smile slowly appeared on his face, as he quickly stole a gentle kiss, yet full of love, from her.

“Let’s leave behind all the sadness and chaos with the passing year.” He said, although it sounded more like a question directed to the girl in front of him, whom gave him an excited nod.

He then stole an unexpected kiss from her again, but this time not moving his face away too much. They were so close, their foreheads against each other.

”Happy New Year, Jung Soojung. I love you and will always love you. Remember, my heart is for only one person… And that is you. Everyone else is the past, like 2012 is now the past.”

“Happy New Year , Choi Minho. My heart, as a whole, is for you. The past is the past let’s forget about it as 2012 goes by.” With that she blinks and realizes something.

“It’s 2013!?” she jumps.

“It’s a new beginning.” He says as he pulls down the still-surprised Soojung down to sit on his lap.

He whispers in her ears making her blush crimson red,

“A new beginning to everything and the ending bad things, but I’ll still love you forever. However many years that go by the one thing that will never change is how I feel for you. Jung Soojung, I love you.”