FishBrain

Fish Brain.

I looked at him staring out of the window....
How did we even end up like this?

We used to be so close.. Doing everything together..Laughters and kisses here and there. One glance at your brown orb eyes and i know immediately whats going on, how you"re feeling but now..They're so distant, emotionless, full of mystery i cants seem to decipher. Its already been 2 months when all this started. How you seemed so far, out of reach when physically you're just right beside me..

your hand in my grasp, me refusing to let go
even though thats probably what you want to do.

to let go...

If i were to let go... will your body vanish too like what had happened to your heart you once said belonged to me?
 

2 months have I not felt the love and warmth you used to shower me with. 2 long cold months where everynight I'd long for you to show me that sweet angelic smile.. i felt like dying the first few weeks. But then slowly i began to accept things. Silently dreaming, hoping, wishing everything would go back to normal.

I still cry... almost every night actually. Though now im all numb inside.

Im tired..

Im tired of these fake smiles.. laughters..happiness.. I've been trying to project towards our friends, our family to reassure them that Im fine.

Im fine....

They all saw me crumble the first few weeks especially when i tried to approach you. to stop all these from happening but you fish-face just had to make it impossible.

Avoiding me..... Barely replying to my messages...Barely talking to me... really didnt help in fixing all these you made.

When you asked me out for lunch today i though it was the start to mending back our relationship. you actually made me hope, for my bestfriend.. my boyfriend to come back. But seeing that you were mostlt out of your mind, thinking somewhere far, Not even sparing me a glance, Made me realise and know that you only did this just cause you felt like you had to. Not cause you missed me like how badly i miss you.

I looked back at my food..
playing with it.

No words exchanged..

No contact made..

-------------------------------------------------------------------

" thanks for lunch... and for sending me home.." i sadly greeted goodbye.

"hmm." and with that you just left. Leaving me at the front door of my house. 

Tears started to fall.. i smiled bitterly to myself.. Hae-ah.. this is gonna be the last time im gonna cry for you...

----------------------------

 a few weeks had passed and gladly.... I've relatively moved on..

kinda..

Well on the outside at least, I've been keeping myself busy; dancing.. writing music.. hanging out with my friends.. studies.. more dancing. espicially these past few day.. With the school festival and all.

And honestly they did keep my mind of HIM... no way am i saying that dumb fish's name.

He made me cry... he made me crumble BUT no way will i let him destroy the almighty hyukkie.

"hyukkie!!!"

I looked at the source of the voice and saw my 2 other bestfriends excluding that fishtard.

"minnie...kyu.. Whats up?" they catched up with sungmin almost tripping over Kyuhyun's legs. 

" YAH LEE SUNGMIN! Cant your overly stuffed pink brain even understand the meaning of walking properly?! geeeez." Kyuhyun annoyed at sungmin's clumsiness..

sheeesh... here goes these two moronic couple.

" yah! you insolent brat.. If it wasnt for your stupid girraffe legs that wouldnt have had happened!! "

here we go again... seriously i dont get why these two just dont make out in the corner while confessing their hidden love for eachother...

" at least i have long flawless legs unlike your full of flaw short legs! im not even surprise your the best loyal costumer of that weird guy who sells those ridiculously tall insoles!"

" WHY YOU!!!!-"

" yah! your both brats ok?? so stop fighting for that tittle!........moronic stupid oblivious brats...' i whispered the last one..

" Your brats to be exact hyung~" kyuhyun sweetly smiled...

theyre acting nice.......... them acting nice always isnt good....

-----------------

 

 
" that was a great performance minnie!" i greeted sungmin as he exited the stage.
 
It was already the festival and we were all super busy with our performanances... 
 
" thanks.. But i did a couple of mistakes! And i dropped my nunchucks! Argh!" 
 
" its fine you pink bunny... Dont frustrate yourself too much.. I mean who woulnt get distracted when this certain someone just had to stare admiringly at you like your the main course of the king's buffet or something... " i soothed him.
 
And there goes min's pink cheeks..
 
"where's kyuhyun anyway?" I smirked.
 
"missing me?" kyuhyun suddenly popped out from the back shocking me in the process. 
 
" YAH! U planning to kill me!" i hit him hard repeatedly.
 
" ow!!! HYUK!! I was just! Stop hitting me you monkey!!!" he kept whining while sungmin was still blushing in the corner...
 
----
 

" eunhyukkie.. That dance...That was awesome as always~ right kyu?" Sungmin approached me enveloping me with his arms.. Awww even with his crazy retarted self he still has this side which is just so sweet..

" not bad for a anchovy... An anchovy in water.. Not too shabby.." He grinned.

" aww... That's the sweetest thing you have said to me this whole day!!" 

Sungmin just rolled his eyes while still hugging me....

-----------

I'm now preparing to perform my last song.. A song i composed out of all my feelings towards donghae these past few days..

 

 
As i entered the stage i started to play my guitar.. Looking around the room, i caught your eyes but you just looked away... Like what you've been doing lately.. Avoiding me.
 
"I used to think one day we'd tell the story of us,
How we met and the sparks flew instantly,
People would say, "They're the lucky ones."
I used to know my place was a spot next to you,
Now I'm searching the room for an empty seat,
'Cause lately I don't even know what page you're on.
 
Oh, a simple complication,
Miscommunications lead to fall-out.
So many things that I wish you knew,
So many walls that I can't break through.
 
Now I'm standing alone in a crowded room and we're not speaking,
And I'm dying to know is it killing you like it's killing me, yeah?
I don't know what to say, since the twist of fate when it all broke down,
And the story of us looks a lot like a tragedy now.
 
Next chapter.
 
How'd we end up this way?
See me nervously pulling at my clothes and trying to look busy,
And you're doing your best to avoid me.
I'm starting to think one day I'll tell the story of us,
How I was losing my mind when I saw you here,
But you held your pride like you should've held me.
 
Oh, I'm scared to see the ending,
Why are we pretending this is nothing?
I'd tell you I miss you but I don't know how,
I've never heard silence quite this loud.
 
Now I'm standing alone in a crowded room and we're not speaking,
And I'm dying to know is it killing you like it's killing me, yeah?
I don't know what to say, since the twist of fate when it all broke down,
And the story of us looks a lot like a tragedy now.
 
This is looking like a contest,
Of who can act like they care less,
But I liked it better when you were on my side.
The battle's in your hands now,
But I would lay my armor down
If you said you'd rather love than fight.
So many things that you wished I knew,
But the story of us might be ending soon.
 
Now I'm standing alone in a crowded room and we're not speaking,
And I'm dying to know is it killing you like it's killing me, yeah?
I don't know what to say, since the twist of fate when it all broke down,
And the story of us looks a lot like a tragedy now, now, now.
And we're not speaking,
And I'm dying to know is it killing you like it's killing me, yeah?
I don't know what to say, since the twist of fate 'cause we're going down,
And the story of us looks a lot like a tragedy now.
 
The end."
 
'Story of us - taylor swift'
 
------
 
" hyukjae-yah!! That was great!" siwon congratulated me.
 
"thanks man. So was your acting just now!" he just smiled and messed up my hair.
 
" Yah!!" he just laughed and walk off.
 
Just then i felt my phone vibrate. 
 
- hae<3-
 
"meet me at the usual place.."
 
...... He wants to see me?....... 
 
My hands started to sweat while my heart thumbed harder reading the message...
 
" ahh... So that fish finally wants to talk to you... Took him long enough..." 
 
" Fudge!!! Damn it kyuhyun what did i tell about sneaking up on me?!?"
 
" Uhh.. When did i ever listen to you?" He smirked while sitting back on the sofa grabbing his game console.
 
Grrr...hyukjae... Remember... Monkeys dont hit gaemgyus.... Monkeys dont hit gaemgyus.
 
" i think its finally time that both of you talk... You should just go hyukkie.." Sungmin suddenly popped out from nowhere situating himself beside kyuhyun...
 
" Seriously guys... If you dont stop doing that.. I mighy just have a heart attack!! .. And...and... I cant meet him..... I have a... I still have to take care of the fireworks display later!.." Yeah... That can work... Smart hyuk! 
 
" already took care of it!... Asked kangin-sshi to helped out.." Sungmin replied..
 
" O-oh... Well thanks but...but i still have to emcee the closing ceremony!.." I clasped my hands...
 
" na-uh... No you arent.. That old white-freak dude from the upper class will.." Kyuhyun said back without his eyes leaving his game..
 
" YOU!! YOU!!! PLANNED ALL THIS!! You know im not ready!!... Guys...... I cant.... Not yet.." I pointed my finger at them... These two.... GAHH!!
 
im not ready.... I cant... Face him.. Not yet.. Facing him can only mean that i have to say goodbye.. Goodbye as a boyfriend.. And probably as a bestfriend.. And i cant lose him...
 
" Hyuk... You have to face this... You have to face him. If not this is never gonna end.. We want to see you happy again hyuk.. The real happy hyuk with that stupid-looking gummy smile.. Please.." Kyuhyun looked at me with his sincere eyes.. With sungmin looking all the same..
 
Theyre right...
 
ill have to end all this today...
 
ill break up with hae today...
 
its the right thing to do...
 
A tear almost rolled down my face... If it werent for the towel kyuhyun threw at me..
 
" now dont go all drama queen on me hyuk... I know im touching and all but face it.. You dont  look good crying..." 
 
" yeah... Hyukkie... You look pretty awful when you cry." Sungmin just had to emphasise that im ugly now does he...?
 
"YAH!- " i threw the towel back at them.... "I love you guys..." I hugged them surprising them.. But still they hugged back...
 
these two really.. They might be crazy, un-sweet at times(especially this brat) and pretty damn oblivious and indenial.. But these two really hold a huge part of my heart.
 
------------
 
 
Ive finally made up my mind. Its the only way i can finally move on and for him to be finally be free.
 
Slowly i made up my way to the rooftop.. Only me and him could go up there.. Our own personal world.. Our personal place.. Its only ours. Just the two of us.. No one else..
 
" hae.." he was Laying at the floor gazing at the stars above.. He slowly turned around and sat up motioning me to sit beside him.
 
" hyukkie.. You.. Came.."
 
"yea..erm.. I wont take long... I just wanna tell you something.. Hae.." I took a deep breath... This is it...
 
" I wanna break-" i was suddenly pulled into his arms.. The warmth ive been craving for finally surrounding me..i started to feel wet on my shoulder then realising that he was crying.. In an instant my tears which  promised not to fall again started to flow down.. 
 
"dont...dont you dare complete that sentence..dont..just please dont..."
 
I started to sob in your chest.. Wetting your chest with my fallen tears. I gripped on your shirt holding onto you not wanting youto let go.. Afraid that if I let go.. You'll just disappear...No not again.
 
His hug tightened and pretty soon my arms found there way around his waist gripping onto him like its for my dear life.. 
 
We remained like that for a while.. Crying.. Hugging eachother like theres no tomorrow.. Simply just escaping to our world.. Our own world.. The world we've been neglecting lately. It was like we were paying back for the days we've miss eachother so so much.. No words were exchanged.. Just simply our sobs and warmth.
 
" hyukkie... I'm so so sorry... I-I've been such a jerk lately. Its just that... Dad's health is deteriorating.. And it made me think that i needed to spend more time with him..i was depressed.. I was hurting so bad i didnt want him to leave me.. And i didnt want to pull you towards this depression knowing that you just got over your grandfather's passing..so i wanted to keep you away from this situation as much as possible.. I didnt want you to get affected by this..i dont want to see you hurt thats why i thought i should stay away from you until my dad recovers... But hyuk... It was harder that i thought...
I miss you so so much you have no idea how much im hurting.. Everynight i clench my fist on my heart hoping to stop the misery and that you'll be back in my arms again.. You dont know how hard i tried to stay away from you.. That i would throw away and dismantle my phone to stop myself from replying you.. How i would cry everytime i see you but stupidly cant be near you knowing that if i do so i cant leave you anymore.. Hyuk...I was dying.. Dying to touch you..dying to hold your hand.. Dying to hug you.. Dying to blow my words to you ear to see you blush.. Dying to tickle you to get what i want.. Dying to be near you.. Dying to kiss you... Dying to see you smile... Dying to show my love towards you..
Im so so sorry.. Jeongmal mianhae.. I love so so freaking much!" he hugged me again this time even tighter than jut now if it was even more possible.. Our sobs got louder and in no meantime our tears started to flow out like Niagara falls.
 
I pulled away from the hug and stared at his eyes.. He was starting to lean forword and my heart started beating faster.. My eyes started to flutter close waiting for the kiss ive been yearning for.. Wait a minute..
 
I hit hit head painfully.
 
"oww!"
 
" YAH! You pabo! How can you do this to me?! Thats your excuse?! Because you didnt want me to be pulled to your depression?! You stupid dumb fishtard.. Im your boyfriend.. Your bestfriend.. Whatever happens to you ill always get pulled to it no matter how much you dont want me to! I could have been there for you .. With you to face this.. Instead of adding more to your hurting.. Cause hae.. You hurt me more by staying away from me.... I was hurting so much you know.. So painful.. I thought you didnt love me anymore.." i started to cry even harder. Donghae looked at me with soft watery eyes while pulling me to his embrace again.
 
"ssh..im sorry.. Im sorry.. Dont ever think that.. Cause hyukkie i will never stop loving you.. No matter how hard i try not to.. Ill still love you.. I love you!" he kissed my forehead and then presed our foreheads together.
 
" i love you" we said at the same time and then both smiled..
 
He slowly closed the distance between us until the gap between our lips was gone.. Our kiss was gentle.. Gentle and sweet. It was to show how we're missing eachother.. It was almost as magical as our first kiss together..
 
Once we pulled away we stared into eachother's eyes and smiled.
 
" looks like the fireworks started once we kissed just proves how magical our love for eachother is" he grinned at me.
 
I blushed at him but nontheless smiled back.
 
" its almost like we're in a movie..so beautiful.."i stared at the fireworks..
 
"like you..." he said to me making me blush again..
 
" That line is so scratched!"
 
Slowly he began to lean forward again..
 
I pushed his forehead back with my index finger.
 
" yah.. Dont think i already forgave you.. You still have have alot of making ups to do!" i poked his cheek.. Which caused Him to pout.
 
" hyukkie baby.. Hae-hae wants to smooch-smooch pweese!" Hmmm aegyo huh?..
 
"hmm... Ok fine.."
 
"YAY! Keke.. Hyukkie baby always cant resist hae-hae aegyo!" he grinned.
 
i slowly leaned forward causing him to close his eyes. I then stopped leaning for forward and whispered in his ears.
 
" not today i didnt.. Poor hae-hae needs smooch-smooch.. Too bad hae-hae still have alot of making up to do to his hyukkie baby to get that.." i poked his cheeks and blew some air to his ears.
 
I then laughed and wanted to run away.
 
" ya-yah! Lee hyukjae!" he woke up from his state and quickly tried to catch me..
 
We ran for a while until he finally caught me..
 
He gently pecked my lips..
 
" there my smooch smooch..! I love you.." he pecked my lips again.
 
" i love you too.. Dont ever leave me again!" i jabbed my finger on his chest.
 
" i wont i promise.. Ill stay by yourside even when you're sick of me!" he smiled and stated proudly.
 
" i wont get sick of you pabo even if you have a fish brain!" i pouted but smiled then he pecked my lips again.
 
 
The end~
 
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Hope you guys enjoy!! Had the idea while listening to taylor swift's story of us XD keke
 
And i hope i didnt disappoint you T_T
 

 

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annyss
#1
Chapter 1: pabo fishae! Dont u dare leave n hurting hyukkie once again pabohae! They r really meant to be each other... Thanx for dis beautiful n luvly story...
kiddoELF
#2
Chapter 1: abo fishie, he mad hyukkie sad just because of his depression, you should just tell him hae, instead of hurting him by avoid hyukkie like that, baboooo ><
fishyeknom
#3
Chapter 1: Hae was avoiding Hyuk because of his depression :( PABO xD he has indeed a brain of a fish :P silly him! xD I really love that KyuMin are with them <3 <3 <3 and the song was beautiful ;) Hae finally regrets everything he's done :D so sweet <3 <3 <3 I really love it!
fishyeknom
#4
the title is quite... funny xD and it'll have so angst if I guess right :D update soon ;)