First Week...

My name is Sandara Park, Dara for short. Living with my parents; a fourth year high school student. 
I dream to be a composer but the problem is I cannot sing. What is the use of having a talent of composing songs if I cannot express it on my own? I’m very secretive about myself. 
Well yes, only two people know that I am composing songs. They’re my best friends. They’re the only one who can appreciate my songs until the day someone came to my life and change it. 
That someone who led me to I am now. Who pursue me to live my dreams.

Cause I can’t tell what you really feel all I know is you’re no good for me; not at all. Am I hearing it right, did you say that we can go back, go back but there’s no way you can make a girl cry. Boy in my arms again calling your name again.

“Sandara, that’s good… well who’s the inspiration?” I put down my guitar as my best friend Bea asks me again if there is someone that inspires me to write those lyrics. Well for now there is no one. 
Ever no one else. I use to write songs inspired by fiction stories or stories of the people I know.

“Again, that’s the title of this. Inspired by Minzy” I told her.

“What?! Are you telling us that you are a lesbian?” CL, my other friend asked me while brushing her hair with her hands.

“No!, she just broke up with her boyfriend.” I answered them again.

“Yah, Sandara-ah! You should not make songs inspired by other people’s lives.”CL stops what she is doing while Bom is just nodding. I just stand up and face the mirror while tying my hair back.

“what’s wrong with that? They’ll never know. They don’t even know I’m interested in their stories.” I look back gain to hem.

“Yeah right, remember you already have two songs inspired by them.” Bom added. “And what’s wrong?” I ask them and sigh.

CL stand from my bed and place her hands on my shoulders. “You never know if someday they hear your songs and know that that is their story..” I cut her before she finishes what she is saying.

Removing her hands on mine and turning back. “This is music! Jeez guys, everyone can connect because this is music. My life... ok?” saying and turn again to face them and smile.

Bom just raised her hand and said “I surrender”.

“Me too, you always can escape from us” CL just laugh. This is just of the scenario when I ask them to judge my work. Well they’ll only say it’s good because they are my best friends. But for me, well, I’m not satisfied with it. 
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The Real First Week

Near or far it is still the same you will never see me just like what I want. 
“Aisht! I cannot concentrate on what I am working on!” I told myself and throw the pen on the desk. Eyeing those kids like I want to fry them all.

Those children they’re so noisy! Well what can I expect I’m in a playground earlier than I use to write lyrics. Maybe I’m just uninspired right now, there’s nothing new with me today.

I just can’t think… there’s no feelings. I just sigh and look around to get some ideas.

When I spotted a young man, around like my age at a swing with a guitar.

“I never saw him around the village, and he’s playing a guitar.” I told myself.

I found myself walking toward the guy but I guess should just sneak and hear what he is singing. I pretend not hearing him and just sit in a bench near him.

“Wow!” I told myself “he is a good singer.” Then there’s an ache in my heart.

“neh! I can’t sing not like him…” I diverted my interest and not bother him.

“He’s not that good at playing guitar not like me… hehe… I can tell I’m better than him… But he is a real good singer!” I cannot help but to talk to my instincts. 
Suddenly someone crack the conversation between me and me.

“ Uhm… Is this your tissue?” and hell yeah the guy just look at my new lyrics. And yeah I wrote my lyrics in a tissue.

“Yeah… how did you get it?” I ask him. Not to mention he is a good looking guy and chubby… how cute.

“It flew in front of me and I knew it is not an ordinary tissue after all.” He said and sat beside me.

“heh… well it is not an ordinary tissue.” I told him not looking at his eyes… cause he has a perfect eyes!.. Sandara-ah!!! He is a new guy to you… WTH!

“You are a poet?” he asked.

“No, it’s just… nothing… inspired of doing something weird.” I finally look at him. He chuckled. “weird?” he asked me.

“ahum!... well I think I should go now.” I bid goodbye before he knew the real purpose of this. I chuckled to myself.

“Yah! Maybe you should bring your guitar next time! With your tissues!” He shouted while I walking away from him.
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Second Week

Going back to the playground now with my guitar and a new set of tissue I remember the guy that I encounter last week.

After meeting him, I can’t help but to think how did he know that I play guitar? And after I met him I can’t write songs. Aisht!

And speaking of him; he is there again!... I diverted my pace and sat in a bench not near him. Again I can’t have any ideas. Maybe I’m desperate enough to be a composer.

Even my mind and feelings are telling to quit already because I will never be as good as others. I sigh. I put my both hands on my face and shook my head.

“Miss, are you alright?” someone is talking to me?
I peak between my hands and saw the guy. I fix myself to confront him.

“Yeah I’m alright.” I told him.

“My name is Kown Jiyong, GD for short.” He offered his hand for a shake.

“and not KJ?” I shook with his hand.

“yeah… Yong for Dragon and G for simply the Ji. And you?” he asked me while sitting beside me.

“Dara” I told him.

“Acronyms… hahaha” he laugh when he knew at my name.

“Yeah” that’s the least I can tell.

“Well Dara you certainly brought your guitar… want to sing for me?”

I suddenly want to laugh and shout at him but I’m friendly enough not to do so.

“Me? Nah!... I’m not a good at singing.” Diverting my look to other things.

“Ok, let’s just play.” He suggested or he commanded? I look at him with confusion.

“It’s a simple game… when I wish for something and came true you will do what I command and vice versa… Ok?”
I just nodded and well, let’s just leave it to fate.

“Ok… I wish there are two birds flying then land at the same time at that place” he said while pointing at a certain place. I laugh and look at me. “What?” he asked me. 
“That will never happen!” I laugh again. And divert my look at the place pointed.
And suddenly two birds really landed on that place. “Told yah!” he laughed at me while I’m in a total shock!

“So I ask you to tell me the truth… what is the real purpose of the things you wrote in that tissue?” He asked me. I don’t know I will tell the truth or what but all I know he knows me as Dara and not Sandara.

“I wrote songs, those are lyrics.” I blurted. He just smile, he just smile?!!!

The game goes on and on and I knew something from him and he knew something from me.

“You are a composer and I am a good singer just like you said” he chuckled while stating that line.

“Conceited!... you found me cute don’t forget that too” I just want to cut it out.

“Let’s try to collaborate.” He told me looking directly to my eyes with the smile that make me nod.

“Why not” moving myself away from him hehe… “It’s getting dark and meet me here next week… I let you sing one of my songs.” I stand up and walk.

“Ok Dara… Nice meeting you!.” He shouted.

What’s with me? It takes me years and 4 composed songs before I told my best friends about it and now I confidently told it to a stranger whom I met twice? Gah!.. I keep fighting to myself while walking back to my home.
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Third Week

“You’re late!” He said while putting my guitar down.

“Sorry, I’m picking the best song that you will sing. You know it’s hard to decide.” I said while sitting next to him and getting my guitar.

“Here is the lyrics and this is the tune… follow the rhythm ok?” I sang the first stanza and the chorus without the melody of the guitar.

“Wow… how old was you when you wrote this?” He asked me after I sang it.

“This is my first composed song when I was in grade 6… you try it.” I get my guitar and started strumming it to the melody.

Cause I dreamt about you three times and your smile is an angel. God knows how I treasure it for you. I’ll remember you because it’s the first time that my heart beats when I am asleep.

“Wow! You get it right that fast, well that’s the chorus only but you really catch that up really fast.” I told him as tears are falling from my eyes.

“Why are you crying?” He asks me while giving me tissue. “Thanks, It never sounded that good… You’re good… it’s the first time you sang it but feelings are already there.” and I pursue to stop my tears.

“Ok let’s wrap this song and next week help me compose song ok?.. I really want to compose another song.” I asked him to help me out while I make myself to smile.

“Ok… that’s not a problem. But I need to go now… let’s wrap up things next week… I have important thing to do.” He ruffled my hair and run away.

It’s the first he left first well, that’s a natural thing… though I walk home still he’s on my mind with his voice singing my song.
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Fourth WeeK

He is not here in the playground… he promised me that he will help me to write my lyrics. Maybe I should continue this song…

Near or far it is still the same you will never see me just like what I want… you use to call me your friend a bestfriend wishing you’ll call me something more…yes you tell me all your secrets…. Yes you told me that you follow me… but we are just connected in just one thing.. “and that is music” a voice suddenly popped up.

“GD…” I called him while facing him.

“That is just a sad song… well if you want it continue it. 
I’m just here to tell you that I can’t help you right now because I have something important to do.” He smiled at me and gives me a bunch of tissue. “Go for it!... put your heart on it ok?!” He shouted while he runs away.

I continue to write my new lyrics in my room for more privacy and well he is not there. ‘And that is music’. That phrase continue to popped in my mind while writing the song.

*beep*
Send me your work after you finish it ok? And next week wear something that connected to that song. See you at the park :)- GD

He texted me. After reading it I continue to write and at the same time making the melody of it… the melody of sadness…

‘And that is music’… did he know that he is my inspiration while making that song? My mind is telling me to say it aloud while sending the song to him entitled ‘I hate this love song’.
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Fifth WeeK

Since he told me to wear something connected to it so I wear a black dress with purple touch on it. It is sad anyways… with my guitar.

“You look nice in that dress,” GD said while approaching me.

“The song is nice… rather sad...” he continued while pinching my nose.

“Smile Dara-AH..” He commanded me again. Instead of smiling sweetly… I smirked at him.

“What the reason for dressing me like this?” I asked him and look at him annoyed. Why should I be annoyed?

“It’s a secret let’s go now?” He asked or he commanded me?

“Where?” I asked first. “To your dream.” He told me with a bright smile.

“Where?” I asked him again is he high? “Just go with me”pulling me with him.
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“Is this a bar?” I asked him because it is smells alcohol.

“Yeah, this is not a nightclub where you can see girls going around… This club is owned by my dad so we are allowed here, where basically were not supposed to… but I convinced him by singing here the last two weeks.” He told me like he is explaining something important.

“That is the important thing you are telling me, aight? Then why are we here?” I asked him with full of confusion in my eyes. “We are going to perform, “I hate this love song”.” He smiled at me. I looked at him with big teary eyes.

“Don’t cry just hug me ok?” He commanded me so I hold my tears up and hug him. “Thanks” that’s all I can say.

“Let’s go?” He asked me. I nodded. Being with him… I feel confident, I need to go out now in my shell.
I sat next to him with my guitar. I spotted two girls waving their hands and saw CL and Bom.

“What are they doing here?” I whispered to him.

“I invited them, I know them Sandara.” I gulped when he knew my real name.

“Good evening people! I’m back here with my friend Dara to perform her new composed song ‘I hate this love song’”. 
People clapped their hands and I started to strum to the melody.

GD started singing the song until the chorus came up… I hate this love song playing on my guitar cause it reminds me of you… it reminds me of my stupid love belongs to you… it’s reminder I’ll never sing it again. Years of pretending you have a thing for me, years of giving me a feeling that I’m special to you… I’m so stupid in love that’s why I hate this love song… love song… I hate this love song the song ended. People love my song, OUR song.

GD smiled at me and said “don’t cry this is your night.”

“People, this girl with me on stage only knew me for only five weeks… and I knew her for almost 4 years. She never ever saw me at the park she usually go to compose songs and that’s because I’m always at her back listening to her.” Then he looked at me.

“Sandara, did you ever wonder how I know how special that tissue is for you… how I knew you knew how to play guitar because I adore you since I saw you playing your guitar and making the song ‘When I am asleep’. Before I don’t have any courage to tell you how I adore you because I don’t know how to play guitar and I pursue myself to learn. And I catch your eyes by playing my guitar 5 weeks ago. I gain courage to introduce myself to you cause we have now a common thing and that is music.” He told me straight to my eyes.

And my eyes can’t move away from his perfect ones. My heart keeps on beating like it will run from its cage.

“So?” That all I can say. I heard him chuckle and felt that he hold my hand.

“So… Can I be a suitor of yours?” He asked me with big smile.

“Of course… you are still not my boyfriend no hugging” I grin at him when he tried to hug me again.

“Well soon to be.” He answered back and never replaces that big smile of him…

“Conceited! And you still lied to me” I fired him back.

“Sorry…” He said while showing his one sided smile. “Forgiven” simple as it is… my new life started.
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