Seungho lazily kicked his shoes from his feet before turning back to lock the door. Silence welcomed him home and the red head felt his shoulders slump unconsciously as he took notice. It hadn’t been long since the falling out, and Seungho knew he shouldn’t still be feeling so abandoned, but he had spent 2 years with him, 2 unforgettable years full of triumph and pain and hurting and loving. It was hard forgetting a first love that treated you with so many different feelings it left an everlasting impression. Shaking the heavy set thoughts from his head, Seungho removed his loose sweater and hung it in the closet to the left of the door. He blinked as the image of a full closet met his eyes. He could see the buildup of shoes everywhere, mostly his, strewn across the small space while his lay neatly placed in rows off to the side. He always hated it when Seungho tried to organize his things, claiming he couldn’t get anything done if they weren’t left just the way he wanted it. Seungho closed the closet with more force than was necessary and decided he needed to find something to do to make himself sleepy. His job was something he could never get tired of, it was singing at a local club, and even if he came home at a late hour, he still never felt the rush to get to bed. Walking into the kitchen at an easy pace, Seungho let his mind drift as his stomach quivered with the need to eat. He thought of how uncomfortable living by himself truly made him feel, how he would never become accustomed to the emptiness, the haunting silence that spoke of someone’s departure, the warmth he missed when he was around. Seungho neither wanted it nor accepted it, but he was too smart to willingly fall into denial. There was nothing he could say to make things any easier, and he refused to apologize for something that never happened. To him, it was G.O’s fault they ended on such a bad note.

Seungho tossed his dirty plate into the sink and brushed the stray crumbs from his hand against his sweatpants to get rid of them. G.O never liked it when Seungho did so, because it left the crumbs on the cold tiles of the kitchen floor and the small particles always seemed to stick to the soles of his feet. Seungho used to tell him to clean it up if he didn’t like it, a joke of course, and G.O would instead rub the crumbs off on the carpet before finding the small red head and torturing him. Seungho wiggled his way beneath the sheets before he found a comfortable position that left the other side of the bed untouched. It had become one of his many unspoken rules that helped him get by during the first painful week. His first rule had been to leave G.O’s side of the bed alone and try not to touch it as much. His second rule was leave all of the items G.O hadn’t come back for in a box and set it aside. His last rule was to stop looking for G.O, but it had been broken 10 seconds after go slammed the door on his way out.

G.O had a much harder time adjusting to not having Seungho around and it upset him. His friends could barely contact him and he stopped leaving the guest room of Joon’s house after week one. It was hard, so hard it’s almost unexplainable. G.O swore he felt his heart tear in half when he saw Seungho’s burning eyes melt to reveal just how much he had hurt his Yang lover. G.O speaks before he acts, and he always deals with the consequences the wrong way, he knows it, Seungho knows it, but neither of them had the slightest idea how to salvage their broken relationship after the argument. Seungho opted for silence, while G.O escaped through the front door. All else aside, G.O knew he was wrong, he knew it deep down in his broken heart that he was to blame for the argument starting. He had accused Seungho of cheating, accused him of abusing their love for selfish reasons. It actually wasn’t that hard to blame him and that made G.O feel worse. Because Seungho worked at a club late at night, G.O tried not to pry into too much for fear of finding out something that could potentially break him. But Seungho had become distant, quiet; away over the weeks leading up to the , and G.O decided he wanted to know what was going on.

G.O followed Seungho with just one thought in mind: what is Seungho hiding?

G.O saw Seungho smiling as he danced with someone partying unknown and he glared with one thought in mind: How can he smile like that for someone else, but not for me?

G.O left Seungho as he was with one last thought in mind: I can’t take this anymore.

“Byunghee, you can’t be serious,” Joon hissed, entering said boys room unannounced and uninvited. Byunghee dug his head further into the soft covers that still managed to hold remnants of Seungho’s unique scent, ignoring Joon and trying once again to find his happy place.

“GET UP!” Joon had had enough of Byunghee’s moping and depression, and he had decided that it was time for the male to man up and talk to Seungho before things become any worse. He stormed over to the bundle curled up in the bed and grabbed a hold of the sheets. He felt his jaw tighten as Byunghee decided to hold on to the sheets with all his might and in the end they ended up entertaining a game of tug-o-war. Byunghee’s fingers slipped, and Joon took the opportunity to rid him of the sheets he had managed to salvage from his and Seungho’s apartment. But even with the covers gone, Byunghee refused to get up and pretend that he belonged in society. All he could picture was Seungho’s face when he called him a liar and a cheater and an . Byunghee closed his eyes, weaker than his appearance. Joon sighed when he took in the sight of his broken best friend. It did in fact hurt him to have to see Byunghee so sad and alone, and then have to see Seungho during the nights, singing nothing but heart breaking ballads. It was obvious to Joon that the two belonged together, belonged to eachother, and they just needed a push to head off in the make-up direction.

“Hyung, you can’t continue to be like this. This isn’t the man Seungho Hyung fell in love with and this isn’t my best friend. If you just talked it out-“

“We’re not like you and Mir,” Byunghee said, turning on his side and away from Joon, “Seungho isn’t overly optimistic and so forgiving like Mir, and I’m nothing like you. I’m a coward and that’s the truth, so just leave me here and let me be alone. I deserve it after what I did to him.”

“But Hyung! Seungho Hyung misses you too!”

“Joon, you don’t have to lie to make me feel better. I’d prefer you call me a douche and maybe hit me.”

“But it’s true, all he sings are ballads and sad songs about how he’s lonely and sad and he misses you!”

“ . . . Jjin-ja?”

“YES! And I’ll prove it to you if you come with me.” 

Part I