Winter isn't dumb. She isn't oblivious.

 

So how'd she get into this position?

 

What did she miss? Where did it go wrong?

 

She's on her bed, currently looking at nowhere and at the same time, seeing her everywhere,

 

It's messing with her mind.

 

Especially after she received a copy of her new book.

 

Philippines' Best Selling Author

Karina Monteclaro

 

Confessions of an Author

 

Winter couldn't help but chuckle at her stupidity.

 

Of course, typical author she thought.

 

For some reason, she knows na it's raining outside pero Winter's sure as heck na there's hole sa roof niya so how come na may umaagos sa mukha niya?

 

She wiped it.

 

Huh, I still got tears left. She shook her head in dismay.

 

She read the book last night- as soon as it came since it was from her but damn.

 

She shouldn't have.

 

🖋️

 

"Love, how is possible that you're able to convey such feelings through your photos?" Karina asked her lover, eyes unable to leave her now favorite artwork.

 

"You give me too much credit, mahal. Have you read what's on your books?" Winter faced Karina and placed her hands on her waist. She pulled the latter closer to her. "Your words do a lot more than what my photos can, mahal ko."

 

Karina frowned, "no, love." She leaned in for a quick kiss. "Let's settle nalang na we have different ways of expressing our feelings and thoughts, hmm?"

 

Winter couldn't help but smile. She gave the love of her life a peck then nodded in agreement.

 

They continued roaming around the gallery for a couple more minutes before Winter had to go to Hyewon, the organizer of this event, to check how things are going.

 

🖋️

 

Karina has been fiddling with her pen for a while now, trying to think of what to write as she's being bugged by her agent.

 

She let out a sigh.

 

"This isn't working, nothing is," she whispered.

 

A hand enveloped hers, "rest ka muna, mahal?" Inikot ni Winter ang swivel chair na inuupuan ni Karina paharap sa kanya. "Don't stress yourself out, 'wag mo pilitin if wala talaga. Gusto mo bang lumabas tayo? Travel around, baka may makita ka or mag-spark na idea?" Suggestion pa nito sa kanyang sinta na kanina pa hindi mapakali.

 

Nawala ang stress sa mukha ng manunulat at lumitaw ang nakasisilaw na ngiti nito.

 

Alam na alam ni Winter kung paano siya i-handle.

 

"Let's go?"

 

Tumayo agad si Karina at niyakap ang nobya.

 

"I'm grateful that I have you in my life, love." She uttered as she buried her head on Winter's neck.

 

The latter chuckled. "I am more than grateful that you allowed me to be a part of your life, mahal. Grabe, the privilege na mapansin mo pal- aray!" Reklamo nito matapos na kurutin ni Karina ang kanyang tagiliran. Natawa ng bahagya si Winter dahil kahit hindi niya nakikita ang mukha ng dalaga, alam niyang nanlilisik na naman ang mata nito. "Mahal kita. Ikaw lang." Inangat ni Winter ang mukha ni Karina at hinalikan ito sa noo. "Tara na!"

 

 

🖋️

 

2018 ; College Days

 

To say that Karina is a famous author is an understatement. She is not only popular but is also well-known for her works. She's got it all, beauty, brains, and talent.

 

She started writing at a very young age, at first, it was only a habit. It then turned into her way to express her feelings. Oh, she's a fan of Taylor Swift.

 

It didn't come as a surprise when she got contacted by several publishing companies.

 

If you'd check her profile on Wattpad, you'd see that she has millions of followers. Her stories combined probably have hundreds of millions worth of 'read'.

 

Even her writing account on Twitter has a million followers.

 

This didn't happen in a blink of an eye.

 

She's had her fair share of haters and lessons- one thing she used to see a lot was that her writing style and her ideas were really good however, it lacks 'the feeling'.

 

Of course, that has been fixed.

 

She just had to experience it first hand.

 

On the other hand...

 

Winter's been busy juggling her studies, organization, and being her cousin's assistant photographer.

 

She's always been diligent lalo na sa passion niya.

 

She loves working under her cousin kasi maaga palang ay exposed na siya sa industry plus she gets to travel for free.

 

Tapos she's also handling the design cluster sa editorial board ng university nila as the executive editor.

 

She's definitely booked and busy,

 

Pero not when it comes to her crush.

 

Karina.

 

Dang, her beauty is out of this world.

 

She's humble and down to earth, parang an angel graced them with her presence and everyone just can't get enough of her.

 

Winter doesn't even care about the rumors surrounding the lady because there's no way na totoo 'yon.

 

Imagine how Winter was over the moon when Karina and she were partnered for some exhibition na imbento ng department nila for their college's festival.

 

She was on cloud nine when it was announced.

 

Karina didn't show the same enthusiasm but she was definitely thrilled to write about what her partner will give her.

 

Ang concept kasi is 'an artist's depiction'.

 

For example, Winter as a photographer sees the world in a different light through her lenses while Karina portrays it in a different manner through her writings.

 

Kumbaga, combination lang and maybe, just maybe, makagawa sila ng masterpiece, right?

 

Winter will present her photos kay Karina and then she'll write whatever comes to her mind.

 

The first few tries, it was just not working out.

 

Winter isn't disappointed sa mga sinulat ng dalaga about sa photos na kuha niya and she's not about to say "wall 'yung feeling" because she knows how irritating that is for the latter.

 

So she took Karina to places, and she let her experience things firsthand.

 

Kasi ang hirap nga naman na i-portray ang mga kuha ni Winter kung aasa lang si Karina sa finished product.

 

Winter's style of photography is intimate and cinematic.

 

Once you see her pictures, you'll get drawn in them.

 

You'll want to know the story behind the picture.

 

It's going to tug something inside you.

 

Karina wouldn't deny na kahit siya ay hindi satisfied sa mga una niyang sinulat.

 

It was depressing.

 

That's why she was delighted when Winter asked her na sumama sa kanya sa Las Casas since may shoot sila doon.

 

"Good morning. Sa room ko ikaw mag-sstay. Last minute kasi rin pag-aya ko sayo and wala na available rooms. Sakto kasi na may need i-accommodate 'yung place na nag-ttour." Winter explained agad kay Karina after nitong pumasok sa loob ng kotse niya. She fetched the older girl since her cousin's team had to go early.

 

"Good morning din, Winter. It's okay, I'm glad you invited me and I'm actually sorry because I feel like I'll be bothering you guys," apologetic na saad ni Karina.

 

Napalingon naman agad si Winter dito, "no, you're not a bother, Karina." Deny nito na ikinagulat ng kasama.

 

Karina chuckled for the first time sa harap ni Winter, "okay, chill."

 

Tumigil ang mundo ni Winter.

 

Ang... ang ganda. Parang nag-malfunction utak ni Winter.

 

Sa apat na beses na nakita niya ang dalaga, ngayon niya lang ito nakitang tumawa.

 

They've been acting civil lang whenever they meet.

 

They'd just talk about the project, ideas, and their thoughts tapos bye agad.

 

"Winter?" Tawag sa kanya ng dalaga kaya nawala siya sa trance.

 

"Sorry," she smiled shyly while scratching her nape dahil sa nerbyos.

 

"You're fine, let's get going. Hmm?"

 

Winter nodded at sinimulan na mag-drive.

 

It's been hours of silence but they felt comfortable.

 

Ang buong akala ni Winter ay nakatulog na ang kasama kaya kampante na ito na lumingon.

 

She's sure na may possibility silang maaksidente if hindi niya agad iniwas ang tingin sa dalaga.

 

The woman beside her looked picturesque that if only she wasn't driving, she'd make sure to capture that moment.

 

Ewan ni Winter, nakatingin lang naman si Karina sa labas habang pasikat ang araw kaya grabe lang 'yung lighting, feeling, and whatever it is that's emanating from the lady.

 

Winter let out an exasperated sigh dahil hindi niya nakuha 'yung moment na 'yon which made Karina look at her in confusion.

 

"Are you tired? Want me to drive us instead?" Worried na tanong ng dalaga sa kasama.

 

Napalingon na naman si Winter kay Karina na mabilis pa sa alas quatro. "No, I'm not." Deny nito at binalik ang tingin sa daan. "I- I just..." huminga ito ng malalim.

 

"You're?"

 

"Ano, uhm.. disappointed lang." She answered honestly as she scratched her jaw. "Ang ganda kasi ng view kaso hindi ko nakuha."

 

Karina hummed. "Do you want to go back ba? You can go ahead naman and if by chance you want to stop the car to take a picture, it's fine with me."

 

Winter bit her lower lip, iniisip kung aamin ba sa dalaga.

 

"Hey, it's fine, really," pag-assure ni Karina sa kasama.

 

Winter slowed down, "I can't. I missed the right timing already." She looked at Karina, "you look graceful looking all serious with the sun rising as your background and the light slightly hitting your face."

 

Karina, who was shocked for a moment, giggled at Winter's remark.

 

"And I thought I am the writer here?" She joked which made Winter's forehead crease. "Kidding aside, that's nice of you to say. I appreciate it. I'm giving you permission to take pictures of me."

 

"Really?" Winter excitedly asked.

 

Karina laughed. "Silly but yes. I've never heard such compliment so sure." She smiled at the driver.

 

"Ikaw nagsabi niyan ha, stolen man or ready ka wala na bawian."

 

Winter couldn't contain her happiness because finally, she got a muse.

 

"Make sure that I wounldn't look ugly ha," may halong banta na sabi ni Karina.

 

Winter smiled. "What do you mean eh you're never ugly naman?"

 

If Karina isn't dating anyone right now, she'd for sure think na Winter is flirting with her.

 

Who knows, maybe she is?

 

Hindi na rin pa nakapag-isip si Karina dahil nakarating na sila sa destinasyon nila.

 

"This place looks amazing!" She blurted out.

 

"It definitely is, beware lang kasi madami nagpaparamdam dito," saad ni Winter na ikinatakot naman ng kasama.

 

"T-there are ghosts here?" Karina asked.

 

Winter sensed na hindi okay si Karina sa multo kaya she settled na gawin nalang ito na joke kahit meron talagang nagpaparamdam sa lugar.

 

Karina doesn't need to know naman.

 

"Winter, you brought someone pala ha," her cousin as soon as she saw them.

 

"Ate naman," sabay hampas sa pinsan. "Karina, this is ate Seulgi. Pinsan ko na medyo boss. Ate Seul, this is Karina. Partner ko sa sinabi ko sayong project sa uni."

 

"Hi, Karina, It's nice to finally put a face to the name, heard a lot about you" Seulgi offered her hand while Winter groaned kasi nilaglag siya ng pinsan.

 

Karina shook it, "Likewise, I hope that they're all good things."

 

Seulgi looked at her cousin before humming. She handed her the keys to their room. "Lapag niyo muna gamit niyo, you can roam around the place but I'll need you mamayang 10, Win."

 

Winter took note of the time, it's still 7 in the morning so madami pa silang time para mag-ikot.

 

And just like what Seulgi said, inayos muna nilang dalawa ang gamit sa room nila.

 

"Request nalang ako ng isa pang bed, ikaw na dyan sa kama."

 

"No, let's share the bed. It's huge naman so no need to request for another one," may sense naman ang sinabi ni Karina kaso kasi baka mag-gay panic si Winter.

 

She was about to disagree but Karina gave her a stern look which made her gulp. "Okay," wala sa oras na pag-agree niya.

 

Hindi na sila nagsayang ng oras at naglibot sa lugar.

 

Winter was playing with her camera habang naglalakad sila kaya hindi nito napansin nang may dumaan sa harap nila na bike kaya naman bigla itong hinila ni Karina palapit sa kanya.

 

"Sorry!" Nag-apologize 'yung lalaking nag-bbike kahit hindi lang naman siya ang may kasalanan.

 

"Stop tweeking your camera when you're walking," walang emosyon na sabi ni Karina bago naglakad papunta sa bridge.

 

Hindi malaman ni Winter kung bakit pero there's something about Karina that makes everything fit.

 

Winter made sure to capture the scene before her bago niya pa ito ma-miss ulit.

 

Karina's literally just walking by the bridge pero, ewan.

 

Karina stopped in the middle and tried to take in the view before her while Winter made sure she'll be able to save this moment for as long as she's allowed to.

 

Karina heard the shutter nang makalapit si Winter kaya napatingin siya rito.

 

Her face showed confusion at first pero nag-relax din ito nang ngitian ng kasama.

 

"Can't miss this time," sabi ni Winter matapos na ibaba ang camera.

 

🖋️

 

"Win, stop ka na magmukmok. Let's get some air!" Pilit na aya ni Giselle sa kaibigan.

 

Dali-dali itong pumunta sa tirahan ng kaibigan nang mabalitaan niya na nilabas na ang bagong libro ni Karina.

 

"Isusumbong talaga kita kay ate Seul if you don't stop sulking," banta pa nito.

 

Winter groaned, she can't have her cousin giving her another "the talk" right now.

 

Bumangon si Winter sa pagkakahiga at nagpunta sa banyo upang maligo.

 

After a few minutes, natapos rin ito. "Where are we going?" She asked her friend.

 

"Wherever the steering wheel takes us, I guess?"

 

Unplanned trip na naman.

 

Not that Winter is complaining.

 

Because to be honest, this might be good for her.

 

They went to Giselle's car, "let's stop by starbs, I'm suddenly craving for coffee."

 

Tumango lamang si Winter, distracted dahil hinahanap ang kanyang phone.

 

"What's up?" Confused na tanong ni Giselle nang mag-start ito mag-drive.

 

"I think I left my phone sa table," hindi siguradong sagot ni Winter.

 

"Are you expecting a text?"

 

Umiling si Winter, off niya at alam naman sa work niya na hindi siya sumasagot ng tawag kahit na gaano pa ka-importante kaapag rest day niya.

 

"Well then, no need to go back for it. It's not like biglang magkakaroon ng emergency or himala kapag binalikan natin 'yon."

 

🖋️

 

"This is nice, it's hot but the weather is perfect for the scenery," comment ni Winter.

 

"I agree, we should've planned better. Maybe we could go free diving next time?"

 

They're in Batangas right now and hindi nila alam kung bakit sila napunta rito pero bigla nalang naisipan ni Giselle pumunta sa rest house nila.

 

Biglang napalingon si Winter sa kaibigan, "seriously?" Taas kilay na tanong nito dahil alam naman ni Giselle na hindi siya magaling lumangoy.

 

Giselle chuckled, "oh right, maybe si she who must not be named ang invite ko and not you?"

 

Napa-nganga naman ang dalaga sa naisip ng kaibigan.

 

"Chill, I'm just joking. I'm still mad at that for suddenly ghosting you."

 

It irritates Giselle kasi akala niya kilala niya si Karina.

 

They were friends, they all were bago naisipan ni Karina na maging full time writer at iwanan si Winter ng walang pasabi.

 

Of course, Winter tried to reach out.

 

Ask what happened, why it had to happen.

 

She can be a writer naman, she was doing great noong sila pa.

 

So nga ba ang nangyari?

 

But then again, Winter knows when to stop... na maghabol. Hindi ang magmahal.

 

Because after a year of radio silence from her former lover, oo, former kahit na wala naman official breakup, she still loves Karina.

 

That doesn't mean that she'll allow herself na maubos siya.

 

Yes, she was sulking earlier today, but that's only because it's the first time that Karina reached out to her.

 

Through a book pa and halata naman na inspired 'yon sa istorya nilang dalawa, iba lang ang pangalan at ending... scratch that, open ending ang nobela ni Karina at may open question na hindi sigurado ni Winter kung para ba sa kanya ito pero kahit na ba, mas better ang outcome sa libro kesa sa real life.

 

Putang ina.

 

She thought na she's okay na.

 

Eto tayo eh, alam na alam ni Karina na sa isang paramdam lang, kuha niya na naman si Winter.

 

Biro lang.

 

"I've read it, have you?"

 

Biglang tanong ni Giselle.

 

Winter nodded, "she sent me a copy."

 

Mabilis na naibuga ni Giselle ang iniinom, "what the ?"

 

Winter smiled bitterly, "she even signed it."

 

"That talaga, mababatukan ko 'yon once na bumalik tayo sa manila."

 

Natawa naman ng bahagya rito si Winter, "as if naman mabatukan."

 

"But seriously, what do you think?"

 

Winter hummed, nabalot sila ng katahimikan ng ilang segundo.

 

"The story's wonderful. But I think she wasn't able to portray my side that well. Hindi ko rin sigurado if heavily edited ba 'yung feelings niya para mag-fit sa book. Nonetheless, I enjoyed the book. It's better sa reality," honest na sagot nito.

 

"Well, there's always two sides of the story. As the third person who witnessed your love story, I think na accurate naman 'yung character niya sa kanya. Not defending her, okay?" Biglang clarify ni Giselle. "It's just that, she treated you a lot more different than her previous lovers, we all know her reputation back then. And she didn't treat you lang naman as an experiment for me, well, not until she ghosted you. That talaga, my blood is boiling again sa stupidity niya."

 

Giselle let out a huge sigh. "But say, do you have an answer for her question?"

 

Winter gave Giselle a knowing smile.

 

Naalala bigla ni Winter ang rumors na bumalot kay Karina noon.

 

Her friends actually told her about it after nila pumunta ng Las Casas.

 

Binalaan siya na 'wag mahulog sa dalaga dahil baka siya na ang sunod na isulat nito, funnily enough, it happened na nga.

 

Pero tama nga naman si Giselle, if Karina treated her the same, they wouldn't last for four years.

 

Because normally, as per her friends, a month or two lang ang tinatagal ng relasyon nito.

 

Fan talaga ni Taylor.

 

Aaminin naman ni Winter na medyo na-taken aback siya sa nabalitaan pero she eventually decided to trust Karina.

 

She doesn't regret it one bit.

 

Pero putang ina pa rin nito, lakas ng trippings.

 

"Are you going to drink your wine ba or are you just going to stare sa dagat?"

 

Winter scoffed, "you brought me here to relax tapos parang ngayon, ayaw mo naman na at peace ako?"

 

Hinampas ni Giselle and kaibigan sa braso, "it's because you're wasting the wine, if you're not drinking it then give it to me."

 

Napa-iling nalang si Winter at inubos ang alak. "Happy?"

 

🖋️

 

"," Winter can't help but curse after niya makita ang notifications sa kanyang phone.

 

A chill ran down her spine.

 

"Why, what's up?" Confused na tanong ni Giselle.

 

They're back na sa condo ni Winter at dito na pinag-stay niya ang kaibigan dahil gabi na at delikado if mag-drive pa ito pauwi.

 

Pero back sa notifications, "what the Gi, ang daming notif!"

 

"From? Ano ba 'yan?" Impatient na tanong ni Giselle sabay hablot ng phone sa kaibigan.

 

"What the ?!" Even she couldn't help but curse.

 

"Winter!" They both heard a loud knock and an angry girl sa labas ng pintuan ni Winter.

 

Napatingin si Giselle sa phone niya na bagong open, her battery died at ngayon lang siya nakapag-charge kaya naman hindi niya alam na pati siya ay may sandamakmak na text at tawag.

 

HIndi ni Winter alam kung ano ang nararamdaman niya ngayon, takot ba, kaba, saya, galit, hindi niya na alam.

 

Mixed emotions.

 

"Winter Fajardo, I know you're inside, I saw your car. Open this goddamn door or else," the person behind her door said in a threatening manner.

 

"Gi, what the ?" The nervousness won over and she looked at Gi na para bang humihingi ng tulong.

 

"Just open the door, Win. Safest 'yon."

 

Dahan-dahan na lumapit si Winter sa pintuan, hawak na nito ang doorknob at lumingon muli sa kaibigan, "sure?"

 

Tipid na ngumiti ang kaibigan at tumango.

 

She opened the door slowly and she can now see that the person in front of her is fuming.

 

"Uh, hi?" Wala sa wisyo na bati nito.

 

"Hi? Are you kidding me?" The person in front of her ran her hands through her hair as her eyebrows twitched in annoyance.

 

"That's what you're going to say to me after ignoring my texts? What were you doing?" The person asked; noticing that there's another pair of sandals on Winter's doorstep and she's sure as heck that it's not Winter's.

 

"Who are you with? Did you bring in another girl sa room mo, Winter Fajardo?" she asked with her deadly stare, tipong isang maling sagot lang ni Winter ay langit na ang makikita niya.

 

She stifled a laugh, "o-."

 

" ka," biglang singit ni Giselle at binatukan ang kaibigan.

 

"What the , Gi? What was that for?" Inis na tanong nito at napahawak sa batok.

 

"I got annoyed when I remembered what you did, you . And can you not? Winter was with me the whole day, she forgot to bring her phone. My battery died. I'm the only girl she's ever brought here today. For 's sake, just get a room. I'm out." And with that, tuluyan na umalis si Giselle, hindi na siya makikitulog kay Winter dahil sure naman siya na sa couch ang bagsak niya dahil may dumating na iba.

 

"Pasok ka?" Patanong na aya ni Winter sa dalaga.

 

"Are you asking me or are you inviting me in?" Taas kilay na tanong nito.

 

Ang taray talaga, ma. Kala mo hindi ako iniwan. Winter rolled her eyes sa naisip.

 

"Pumasok ka na, baka mareklamo ako ng ibang tenants," sagot nito at tumalikod na papunta sa kitchen para kumuha ng tubig para sa dalaga at para na rin magluto ng dinner.

 

She suddenly held Winter's arms and turned her around para makaharap ito.

 

"Don't turn your back on me like that, love." She defeatedly asked her kahit alam niyang wala siyang karapatan after what she did.

 

"Kukuha lang ako ng water mo," napabuntong hininga si Winter at akmang tatalikod muli para buksan ang fridge nang pigilan siya ng dalaga at kinulong sa bisig nito.

 

"I missed you so much, my love."

 

Hindi marupok si Winter.

 

"What do you mean? We're not together anymore, Karina," confused na tanong ni WInter.

 

Kanina pa nalilito ang dalaga.

 

The way Giselle and Karina interacted kanina doesn't seem like matagal silang hindi nagkita.

 

Bakit naman biglang nagparamdam sa kanya si Karina after ignoring her for a year?

 

Ano naman sa dalaga kung may iba siyang dalhin sa condo niya, it's hers and they aren't together anymore.

 

Saan naman nanggaling ang lakas ng loob ni Karina para bigla nalang bumalik sa kanya na para bang walang nangyari?

 

Bakit siya nito tinadtad ng text at tawag, threatening her even na 'wag magtangkang makipag-date sa iba, ano naman kay Karina?

 

Bakit parang ang dali naman sabihin sa kanya ng dalaga na na-miss niya ito eh siya naman ang umalis?

 

"Say something, love," mahinang sabi ni Karina na kinakabahan dahil sa katangahan niya.

 

She didn't break up with Winter so technically, she's still her girlfriend kahit na bigla siya nawala.

 

It takes two to build a relationship so it's only natural na it takes two to break it apart.

 

And maybe she knows that she's at fault but still, she's wondering... baka pwede pa?

 

"So, uh, your answer?"

 

Winter gave her a puzzled look.

 

"You... you haven't read the book yet?" 

 

Napakalas sa yakap si Winter kay Karina para titigan ito, "oh, para sa akin ba 'yung question?"

 

Karina hugged Winter again and hid her face on her shoulder before nodding.

 

Winter sighed before finally hugging Karina back.

 

She caressed her back to calm the taller girl, "do you seriously think that you can leave and come back sa buhay ko na parang walang nangyari?" She paused for a second, contemplating if itutuloy ang nais sabihin. "You left me hanging, Karina. No explanations, no goodbyes. You disappeared on me and ignored me like we were nothing, like we're strangers. You know naman na whatever your reason is, I'd always understand you. You just have to tell me things, you know? Parang wala naman tayong pinagsamahan. Parang hindi mo naman ako girlfriend. Nasaktan ako ng sobra, Karina. And I don't think na I'll be able to trust you anytime soon kasi pakiramdam ko, imahinasyon lang kita ngayon. Na paggising ko kinabukasan, wala ka na naman. Hindi man halata pero you leaving out of nowhere traumatized me. I'm too scared to trust and accept new people in my life right now kasi feeling ko, katulad mo, iiwan lang din nila ako bigla."

 

Hindi man nakikita ni Winter ang mukha ng dalaga pero ramdam nito ang pagtaas baba ng balikat ng kayakap, rinig ang hikbi nito at ramdam pa niya na nababasa na ang damit niya.

 

"You can't just come back sa buhay ko na ganito. Oo, mahal pa rin kita. Hindi naman nawala 'yon. Ikaw pa rin. Alam kong alam mo naman 'yon. Ikaw lang, walang iba. Pero hindi ibig sabihin non, hahayaan nalang kita bumalik sa akin. Bibigyan nalang kita ulit ng karapatan para saktan ako. Hindi ganoon kadali 'yo-."

 

Natahimik si Winter.

 

Paano namang hindi ito matatahimik kung bigla nalang ito hinalikan ni Karina sa labi?

 

Humiwalay si Winter agad, "akala mo ba mar--."

 

Hinalikan itong muli ni Karina at ipinaikot ang braso sa leeg ni Winter.

 

Sabihin na natin na oo, nasaktan si Winter.

 

Pero tangina naman, kung si Karina ba hahalik sayo eh hindi ka hahalik pabalik?

 

Ano ka, tanga?

 

Karina na 'yon, choosy pa ba si Winter?

 

Oo, masakit nung una, pero noong una lang naman 'yon!

 

Hindi naman siguro mali maging sobrang bading para kay Karina, tangina naman talaga.

 

Their lips slowly parted, both ladies panting from the passionate kiss.

 

Karina sniffed, "I thought you're not marupok," pabirong saad nito kay Winter.

 

The latter couldn't help but scoff. "Seriously, Kar--"

 

Karina gave her a peck, "mahal ko." She corrected her lover, not liking the part na Winter's not acknowledging her as the love of her life. Not claiming her.

 

"Ang daya mo naman eh," maktol ni Winter.

 

Karina kissed her forehead before resting her head on her shoulders, "forgive me for leaving you, love." Hinigpitan lalo ni Karina ang yakap sa kasintahan. "I'll make it up to you, I'll earn your trust again, just let me be in your life again, please?" She begged.

 

Hindi na napigilan ni Winter ang luha, "tangina naman eh, alam mo naman na hindi ko kayang makita ka na ganito." She harshly ran her hand through her hair. "I've forgiven you, matagal na. But I still can't promise you na I'll be able to forget what you did, na... na magiging okay agad lahat. Oo, medyo marupok talaga ako for you, ikaw 'yan eh. Karina ko, minamahal ko. Mahal kita. Pero you know me, aawayin kita ng malala."

 

Hindi alam ni Winter kung saan nanggaling ang lakas ng loob niya na magbiro pero totoo naman.

 

Karina cracked up as well, "it's fine by me, my love." Karina knows that she'll have to deal with sulky Winter but she's ready for it. "Be mad, be angry at me, be sulky, I don't care. Just let me stay by your side, I'll make suyo sayo everyday," natawa ng bahagya si Karina na ikinataas naman ng kilay ni Winter. Sweet message tapos bigla tatawa. "Sorry, love. I just remembered na I always make suyo naman even before, my cute little pup!" She teased sabay pisil sa pisngi ni Winter.

 

Hinampas ni Winter and kamay ni Karina at sinamaan ito ng tingin.

 

Karina smoothened the crease on Winter's forehead and kissed her pouty lips.

 

"Alright, alright. Forgive me na, love. Joke lang," she said and softly smiled at Winter.

 

For some reason, parang bumalik sa pagiging teenager ang dalaga, umiwas ito ng tingin kay Karina dahil ramdam nito ang pag-init ng mukha. Sobrang lakas pa rin talaga ng epekto sa kanya ni Karina.

 

"Kilig 'yan?" Karina teased kaya sinamaan na naman ito ng tingin ni Winter.

 

"Kidding aside, let's go sit." Hinila ni Karina si Winter papunta sa couch para maupo.

 

"I know na my reason isn't going to be enough para iwan ka but still, you deserve an explanation." Panimula ni Karina.

 

Winter just nodded to let Karina know that she's listening, that she's willing to hear her out.

 

"As you know, I was having a hard time writing. The pressure of being on the top didn't really help and I know that I could've just asked you out, just like what we always do. But it really wasn't helping me get ideas na, I was stuck. And I couldn't let that affect us, you, I couldn't just allow myself to bother you, we had our own fair share of problems at the time. I know we promised to be together, even through hard times pero, I was stupid, and forgive me for doing that." Malumanay na paliwanag ng nakatatanda.

 

If you'll think about it, yes, hindi sapat 'yung rason ni Karina sa pag-iwan niya kay Winter but can we really invalidate her feelings?

 

She's the one feeling it.

 

Mababaw man para sa atin ang dahilan nito, hindi naman tayo ang nakaranas ng paghihirap niya.

 

We really cannot judge a person just because we think we can deal with the problem that they're facing.

 

We're not the same person.

 

We deal with out things differently.

 

And yes, she could've handled it better. She could've talked it out with Winter but it already happened.

 

She's going to make it up with her girl and she's making sure that it won't happen again.

 

Hindi niya nga alam kung paano niya nakaya 'yung isang taon na wala ito sa tabi niya.

 

She locked herself out in a province that her company provided, as per her request.

 

And it didn't just hurt Winter, imagine, having to write your story, missing your other half but then hindi mo siya kaya harapin matapos mo iwanan. At least, not until she's done with her book.

 

And goddamn, she was so scared.

 

Scared na baka makakita ng iba si Winter, someone better.

 

'Yung hindi siya iiwan out of nowhere.

 

Someone prettier than her, as if naman meron, tutusukin talaga ni Karina ang mata ni Winter if ever.

 

That's why she couldn't help but secretly contact Giselle through Ningning.

 

Pinagalitan siya ng malala ng kaibigan pero hindi naman kasi ito desisyon ni Giselle.

 

Wala naman sa kanya ang desisyon para sabihin kay Winter ang lahat.

 

But Karina's thankful kay Giselle, updated siya sa dalaga.

 

Hindi lang niya talaga napigilan kaninang tanghali dahil wala sa kanilang nag-rereply sa kanya.

 

Her emotions got the best of her.

 

"Sayang naman speech ko, parang hindi ka naman nakinig," sabi ni Winter kaya napabalik sa wisyo si Karina.

 

She looked at her with a confused face.

 

"Bahala ka na nga," at akmang tatayo na sana ang taglamig ng hilain ito ni Karina kaya napaupo ito sa kanyang hita.

 

"Baby naman, ano ba 'yon? Naisip ko lang 'yung kanina kasi na hindi ka nag-reply, akala ko may iba ka na," pag-amin nito.

 

Winter scoffed, "ako pa ang may iba?"

 

"Love naman," Karina pouted which made Winter smile.

 

"Cute," she whispered. "As I was saying, you have to make it up to me, right?" Karina nodded.

 

"I'm actually supposed to produce a photobook and do a photo exhibition. Remember when we had that project back in college? Need mo lang naman magsulat ulit para sa akin at alam mo kung gaano ako kaarte. I need to you to use your brilliant mind and express my photos in writing. Of course, you'll have to go with me sa iba't ibang lugar because may trust issue ako sayo ngayon, I need to make sure that you know the feeling that I'm trying to portray."

 

Karina couldn't stop the smile from coming out of its way onto her lips.

 

"So," Winter continued, "are you ready to see the world with me?"

 

🖋️

 

i'm sure i missed a lot of points here

i just really remembered that i have this in my drafts tapos ayon, naisip ko lang tapusin kaso rushed

didn't proofread it ulit, sorry

pero ayon, naalala ko lang kasi kung gaano ako karupok

sorry naman, haha

i was actually planning na isama 'yung libro na ginawa ni Karina since Murder She Wrote ang title kaso hindi ko na maalala saan nakalagay notes ko

but ayon, hope this wasn't a waste of your time

tinapos ko lang talaga 'to kasi wala update mga inaabangan kong story, haha!

 

have a great day ahead!