Drawn by You
(Winter's POV)

Tuesday

“Ryujin, please, we are not doing this now. I’m tired.”

“I don’t want to fight either. I’m just asking. Why you didn’t pick up your phone?”

“I told you before. I’m in the meeting.” Winter tried to explain.

“Management meeting until this late? does this make sense?” Ryujin snapped furiously.

Winter flinched at the harshness in Ryujin’s tone.

“You can call my manager if you don’t believe me.”

“The one that was always flirting on you? Do you think I’ll believe him?” Ryujin soon started her psychological warfare with her.

“I always knew that bastard keeping you this late for something. This is because of how you behave in front of him. You seduce her with the way you talk, the way you dressed up and make up. Don’t try to fool me.”

Ryujin constantly abused Winter verbally and blamed her for all her actions, good and bad, like Winter was responsible for them.

“Ryujin-ah, why are you like this? Please don’t be like this.” Winter took Ryujin’s hand, trying to calm her.

Ryujin yanked Winter’s hand away and stepped closer to the door, “I would not have done any of this if you had picked up my calls before.”

Ryujin was always making a fuss and getting stirred up about the smallest thing.

“I know. It’s my fault. I’m really sorry. I should answer your call right away,” Winter’s eyes were shaking in fears, “Please, let’s stop fighting. Okay?”

“Do you want me to stop? Okay, let’s break up.” She said with a stern voice.

“No, Ryujin, no, please don’t do this.” Winter started crying as she continued to beg, “It’s my fault. I’m sorry. Please, don’t go.”

“I’m sick of you,” Ryujin said one last time before leaving Winter’s apartment.

The door’s slam echo to Winter’s ears, bring her to slumped on the living room floor, break down and crying.

After crying for a long time and getting tired, it took a lot of willpower for Winter to drag herself to washed up and put herself on the bed.

What made her feel so hard to let Ryujin go? she asked herself.

It was her first experience giving herself to another, body and soul. Ryujin was her first in everything. Making it hard to let go of that person, especially when Winter was the one putting in all the effort. She thinks it’s true love, and what Ryujin did to her was purely love. But what she didn’t realize is it’s actually a toxic relationship.

Indeed, it was an unhealthy relationship for a long time, and in fact, since in the relationship, Winter always feels like she has no control over her life. It was like she lived on eggshells. She was anxious most of the time.

She tried over and over to see Ryujin’s good side. She kept on hoping and praying that they would be fine. However, all she seems to be doing is trying to make Ryujin happy and not anger her, in the fear that if she does something that Ryujin doesn’t like or approve of, Ryujin will get angry.

But she was tired and done fighting every battle by herself.

Wednesday

Winter woke up at her usual time. Her eyes were puffy from crying all night.

Her routine has remained the same. She took a bath first, then have a light breakfast.

She looked up to the wall clock, a corner of lifted for a smile.

Winter stepped out to her balcony while bringing the watering can.

She waters the plants one by one, moves from geraniums to gardenia, gently touches the green leaves, and inspects the buds.

From the corner of her eye, Winter saw the girl on the balcony, “Hey, she’s right there, isn’t she?” Winter asked the gardenias.

As ridiculous as it sounds, Winter grew the habit of talking to her plants as the way to silently greeting the person who is always standing on the balcony at that hour every day.

“Should I turn away? I’m so nervous. Why I’m like this?” She talks to gardenias again, as if they have an answer for her.

Winter stayed by the gardenias, her eyes darting from the blooming flower to the person across the balcony from her. Their eyes met for the first time.

Once she looked up, she couldn’t take her eyes off the girl that was looking back at her. The girl smiled at her.

Before the breakup, she never had any courage to look up to the balcony across her, even though she knows the girl was always there. She believes that looking at the girl makes her feel like the cheating girlfriend. Now, she doesn’t have to feel that way anymore, right?

Usually, Winter would go back inside and watch the girl through the window blinds, but not in a creepy way. The girl was so gorgeous, she looks like a beautiful character from a comic book. Making it quite impossible to ignore her.

Without realizing it, Winter has learned the girl’s routine, like how the girl always has a coffee for breakfast, sometimes stays at the balcony for a while doing some sketching, or just daydreaming while smoking her cigarette at night.

She challenges herself to stay and smiles back at the girl across her.

Out of nowhere, the girl greets her using a sketchbook with GOOD MORNING on it.

It's obvious Winter doesn’t know what to do. She was too shy and unequipped. She didn’t want to greet back by shouting either. But she didn’t want to lose her chance to make a friend with the neighbour. She quickly ran back inside to find a paper and a pen marker.

Standing again at the balcony, she raised the paper with a shy smile.

MORNING TO YOU, TOO!

Winter was smiling in anticipation as the girl seemed to be writing a reply again.

HAVE A NICE DAY!

Winter was smiling so widely as she read the girl’s words.

It was a small gesture from the girl, but Winter had appreciated it more than anything.

Maybe, just maybe, she can also embrace herself and deserve a chance of another good day.

THURSDAY

Winter has been calling out of work for a “personal matter”. She’s aware that she was being irresponsible, but her mind was in a mess. She was distracted while working and was even caught by her manager.

She decided to use her day off to clean her apartment and took a mental note that she has been run out of groceries.

When Winter thought maybe she had bypassed the after breakup shock and was finally on the path to recovery, but it’s finally hit her unexpectedly.

She stumbled upon the pictures of her and Ryujin in the drawer and other things that reminded her of Ryujin. She gasped in a breath and exhaled unsteadily but eventually couldn’t hold back the tears.

The crying turned into uncontrollable sobs, her hands trembling as she covered , wet with tears.

She had foolishly thought then she could right things, that she could put everything back into place and be happy again. But, the more she thought about it, the more she felt sorry for herself.

Winter was the one that mentally and physically exhausted with her life with Ryujin. But she failed to read the signals all this time. She’s been running in a circle, which gave her nothing but fatigue and a feeling of guilt.

A wave of self-pity swept through her. After a few moments of had a long cry, she determined that she needed to find herself again after being lost in an unhealthy relationship.

She was better than this. She was better than thinking she can’t survive this. Because she can and she will.

Later that afternoon, she decided to buy groceries at the supermarket and clear her mind for a moment by getting out of the house.

She had just gotten off of the taxi, struggling to carry two groceries bags in each hand. After thanking the taxi driver, she adjusted her balance in both hands and was about to walk into the apartment’s lobby when someone was standing beside her without her noticing.

“Hey, can I give you a hand?” The girl said, extends her hand.

Winter looked up and was surprised by the girl’s sudden appearance. She was also momentarily stunned by the girl’s friendly gesture.

“Thanks very much, but I’m fine,” Winter politely declines, but her smile saying otherwise.

“You sure?” The girl prodded gently, “That looks kinda heavy,” she added.

But it’s evident that Winter’s words contrasted with the weight of the shopping bag she was holding. She smiled sheepishly at the girl.

“Come on, let me help you,” The girl insisted as she took the two shopping bags from Winter’s hands and smiling so widely.

“Thank you, sorry to trouble you,” Winter’s smile was nervous.

“No worries,” The girl was still smiling eagerly.

The girl’s look of anticipation and excitement infected Winter. She found herself smiling back.

Winter didn’t know why she slowed her footsteps, maybe because of the heavy groceries or purely because she wanted to be around the girl much longer because the girl’s company is strangely calming her, and the girl’s eagerness balancing her unsteady energy.

“That’s an elevator to your block,” Winter said to overcome their awkwardness, directing her chin to the elevator on the opposite side.

“Yup, that’s an elevator to my block,” The girl replied, smiles softly.

They entered the elevator together, and the girl asked Winter to confirm. “Twenty, right?”

“Yes, it’s twenty. Thanks.” Winter affirmed with a polite smile.

Winter was standing slightly behind the girl who was closer to the elevator doors. She moved her head to get a clearer view of the girl. The girl was wearing an oversized sweater and cut denim shorts. She had the hoodie up to cover her hair, a few strands of long hair flowing out from her hoodie.

Winter has always admired the girl from afar, but the thought of standing this close with the girl was so crazy. The girl was simply gorgeous. Oh, she also smells so nice, like gardenias.

Winter keeps staring at the girl’s back until the girl suddenly turns around and asking her.

“So, you’re throwing a house party? You sure buy a lot of groceries and beers.” The girl asked while raised a bag with a lot of beer cans.

Winter startled, she quickly darted her eyes to the bags, hoping that the girl wouldn’t notice Winter was checking her out.

“Not really, it’s just I cook a lot. And sometimes my friend comes for dinner,” Winter almost caught herself saying ‘girlfriend’ but managed to catch it in time.

“And the beers are not for me.” Winter was nervous despite there being no real reason to be.

She was surprised herself; why would she unconsciously buy so many beers? She feels stupid. It’s just a habit of her that she did for Ryujin. Every time she goes shopping for groceries, beer is always on the list.

“Ohh, right,” The girl nodded her understanding.

“How about you? You good at drinking?” Winter was trying to keep the conversation going.

“I have a pretty low tolerance for alcohol,” The girl grinned, trying to look convincing.

“Really?” Winter said with a hint of disbelief.

“Hey, I’m serious. I can’t drink well.” The girl laughed, its sound drawing a laugh out of Winter as well.

“Alright, I believe you,” Winter let out a breath of a laugh and smiled.

The elevator went ding, and the doors opened so quickly.

They were surprised because the elevator ride was too short.

“We’re here,” Winter said when they arrived at the door, then stretched out her hand, asking back for her groceries bag.

“Oh, right. Here,” The girl gives back the bags.

“Thank you so much for your help,”

“No worries,” The girl smiles again at Winter, “I’ll get going now,”

“Ohh, okay,” Winter trying not to sounds disappointing as she already is.

The girl turns around and is about to leave, but Winter is calling her again.

“Hey, I’ll pay you back with my cooking. It’s not good to eat instant noodles all the time,” Winter said.

She has been noticing the plastic bag of the other girl since in the elevator. The girl bought three cups of instant noodles and four packs of cigarettes.

“Alright. Next time, then.” The girl was smiling one last time at Winter before really disappeared from her sight.

Winter closed the door behind her and leaning her back against it.

Winter found herself smiling, recalling the short moment she had with the girl.

It then hit Winter for the first time. Someone had kept her feet on the ground after a while. The girl’s presence was very convenient. For the first time in a long time, she felt like she had something to look forward to.

“Oh God, I forgot to ask her name,”

FRIDAY

Winter pulled her body out of the elevator. She walked to her apartment with her head down. She was exhausted after a hectic day at work. When she arrived at her door, she saw the legs and familiar sneakers first, but she knew who it was before looking up. Hoping she was wrong.

“Why did you change your door password?” Ryujin asked with such tension in her voice as she sk