now playing: we can't be friends (wait for your love) - ariana grande
"but i'd like to just pretend"

 

irene couldn’t remember the last time she was in the same room with these people.

“oh hyun-ah, it’s so good to see you.” the woman gingerly pulled her into a hug, patting her on the back in some awkward attempt of displaying maternal affection. 

“mother.” irene nodded as she stood stiffly until the hug was over. 

“how are you doing? i know this must’ve been sudden…” the elder started. 

“let’s not pretend like we care. he had it coming.” irene replied quietly and her mother’s eyes widened in surprise but she couldn’t mask the hint of amusement that flashed in them. 

irene walked past the woman, briefly glancing around the room at the handful of relatives she did not care about, before moving closer to the couch where a younger girl sat. 

“hey.” she offered a small smile. 

“hi unnie.” yerim smiled as irene sat down and she leaned forward to hug her, staying in her embrace as irene patted the back of her head softly. she looked up at the other two half-siblings, giving them a tight-lipped smile which they returned. 

yerim was the youngest of them and the only one with a decent relationship with her father, so irene managed to feel a sliver of sympathy for her. she always had a soft spot for the 17-year old anyway despite their infrequent meetings. 

“seems like everybody is now present.” the short and thin man standing behind the big mahogany desk cleared his throat nervously, adjusting his bowtie. “we can now begin the reading of the will for the recently departed bae junho.” 

irene noticed her mother fidgeting with the obnoxiously large diamond ring on her finger and she laughed internally. when was the last time she had even worn that? their marriage had been a joke for as long as irene could remember. 

she always knew something wasn’t quite right when she grew up in the family mansion, barely knowing her own father, wondering why other children always had two parents at their school ceremonies. when she was old enough to understand what an affair was and finally knew why her mother cried alone in bed at night. when she was 17 and met suho, her half-brother who was older than her by just a few months. his biological mother had passed away and their father thought it made perfect sense that he should live with them. irene never forgave her father for that and she still couldn’t look at suho without feeling a little sick. 

then she met the younger ones a few years later, jaehyun and yerim. three half-siblings in total, with none of them sharing the same mother. 

“the family yacht, i leave for my younger brother, who always knew how to have a good time...” 

irene held herself back from rolling her eyes at the sight of the grown man doing a fist pump in the air. what a pathetic family. 

“the family mansion, i leave to my beautiful wife so that she may enjoy her days in the warmth of our home with our children.” 

that made irene grit her teeth in annoyance. the expectation that her mother had to treat the illegitimate children as her own was a cruel and twisted request that only a man like him could make. 

“and as for the family business, all rights and the majority of shares to bae enterprises,” the lawyer read out. 

her mother’s intake of air could be heard from beside her and her hand reached over to grasp onto irene’s in a gesture of both anxiety and excitement. irene allowed it but her expression and posture didn’t change the slightest, her eyes trained intently on the small man holding the will. 

“i leave in its entirety to my firstborn, bae joohyun.” 

legitimate firstborn. irene corrected mentally as her eyes made contact with suho’s in a silent battle. she felt her mother squeeze her hand in relief and she, too, felt the tension roll off her shoulders as she let herself breathe. 

but the lawyer unexpectedly continued reading. “under the one condition that she must be married before inheriting the company.” 

all heads in the room turned to look at her and the silence was so deafening. irene couldn’t control her expression of disbelief and bafflement. 

this was ridiculous. 

~

irene sat in silence on the couch in the empty study room, one arm folded across her chest and the other hand propped up to her chin as she frowned in deep thought. 

“honey, i don’t understand why you are being weird about it.” her mother stopped her pacing in front of her. “you got what you wanted, what you deserve! thank the heavens he did not give the company to one of those illegitimate children. can you imagine? that would be absolutely unacceptable.”  

irene’s frown didn’t waver amidst her mother’s ranting. 

“so now,” her mother clasped her hands together and heaved a happy sigh. “all you have to do is propose to seulgi and get married as soon as possible, then everything will be yours. oh honey, this is so exciting!” 

irene looked up at her, “there is just uh…one small problem.” she cleared nervously. 

“and what might that be?” the elder raised an eyebrow. 

“seulgi and i aren’t together anymore.” irene said in a mumble but her mom still heard it. 

“what?! since when?” 

“a month…maybe two or three?” irene let out a sigh and pinched the bridge of her nose. “.” she felt a headache coming at the thought of the mess she was now in. 

“why didn’t you tell me?” her mother asked, sounding hurt and irene scoffed, looking up from her hand. 

“we don’t exactly chat regularly now do we, mother?” she said bitingly. 

the older woman sat down beside irene on the couch and irene folded her arms protectively. 

“why did you break up? things were going so well, you had been together for like what, six years?” 

irene gave her a look, as if saying see? you know nothing about my life. “three years and ten months.” she corrected. 

“yes, which is plenty of time and now you’ve just…let it go?” 

“it wasn’t my choice.” irene responded irritatedly. 

a gasp and her mother clutched at her diamond necklace dramatically. “oh honey you got dumped?” she asked pitifully. 

“n-no!” irene sat up straighter, eyebrows knitted. “it was mutual. i just wouldn’t have brought it up if she didn’t…” she admitted. 

her mother nodded, thinking for a moment. “well then, the answer is simple.” she said, making irene look at her. “you just have to win her back and then marry her.” 

irene let out a groan. “i am not going to use her just to get this inheritance.” 

~

“thank you for meeting me.” irene spoke carefully as she sat across from seulgi. full cups of coffee and an untouched slice of red velvet cake on the table separated them. 

kang seulgi, the heiress of KS automotives which was one of the top rising car brands in the world with their revolutionary range of electric and hydrogen powered vehicles. she was beautiful, charismatic, and intimidating on the outside but incredibly gentle, kind, and sweet on the inside. 

they first met years ago at irene’s family home for her father’s 50th birthday. seulgi was enraptured by the aloof and cold princess of the bae family, having heard of her from others in their social circles. 

maybe it was seulgi’s gentle and sincere nature that melted irene’s usual defenses or maybe it was the extra strong martini irene mixed for herself to get through the dreadful party. either way, it lead to them talking all night and growing fond of one another. 

sometimes irene would still think back to that night even though it was now just a fuzzy memory. she remembered thinking seulgi was so pretty and smart and that she wanted seulgi to be hers. it took her two months after the party to achieve that and she couldn’t have been more proud. 

“i was surprised to see you call.” seulgi spoke emotionlessly and irene emerged from her daydreams. “i thought there was nothing left to say between us.” 

as sweet and soft as seulgi was, she was also someone who could be very assertive and firm in what she believed in. after all, one wouldn't get very far in their world if they let others perceive them as someone they could control or take advantage of. 

“there isn’t.” irene said but then she was too embarrassed to bring up what she needed to say so they sat in silence until seulgi made an assumption about what this might be about. 

“i’m sorry about your father.” she said and irene blinked, not even remembering he had passed away. 

“thank you.” she said out of courtesy and they fell back into silence thanks to irene’s short responses. seulgi glanced down at her watch and then around the quiet restaurant where irene had requested the private room for them. she looked like she wanted to make an excuse to leave so irene quickly spoke up. 

“i don’t know any better way to put this so i will just say it honestly.” she took a deep breath, looking at seulgi with a serious expression. “i need you to marry me.” 

seulgi blinked. irene’s words hung in the air over them and the longer the silence prolonged, the more humiliated irene felt. seulgi's face was unreadable and for a moment irene even worried seulgi didn't hear her correctly. 

until finally seulgi's face cracked into a smile and she let out a short laugh of disbelief. “i’m sorry?” she asked. “you cannot be serious, joohyun.” 

it pained irene to confess. “i am serious.”

“you seem to have forgotten that we dated for four years and broke up recently.” 

“three and ten months.” irene mumbled behind the rim of her cup before taking a sip.  

“what?” seulgi tilted her head, indicating she didn’t hear her. 

“it was ten months, not a fourth year.” 

“i don’t even know why i’m wasting my time here talking to you.” seulgi muttered and grabbed her handbag from her seat. 

“wait! please.” irene reached out to stop seulgi from getting out of her seat. “please let me explain.” she said. 

seulgi didn’t leave but her aura shifted into something much more distant and hostile as she stayed sitting before irene, arms crossed and eyes narrowed. 

“i need…to be married.” irene said, forcing out the words that she hated hearing. “in order to inherit the company from my father.” 

“what sort of excuse is that?” 

“it’s written in the will.” irene snapped back. “it’s some sick joke that he is playing on me even from hell and i refuse to let him win.” 

seulgi’s expression was unenthused. “right, and while that sounds like a lovely father and daughter game, i don’t think i would like to be involved.” she said with a fake smile. 

“seulgi,” irene started, exasperated. “i’ll do anything. you can set every condition and everything can be done on your terms. all i need is to be married on paper and i don’t care for the rest. it just needs to be for 6 months.” 

“you do realize marriage is a big ask, right?” seulgi asked in a lower voice. “it may not be for you, but for some, it is sacred.” 

irene let the jab pass because she was trying her best to get on seulgi’s good side and not piss her off more. 

“help a friend out?” irene tried, lifting the corners of . 

seulgi’s stare hardened and her jaw clenched. “we are not friends.” 

irene sighed, rubbing her temple. with the way seulgi treated her, one would think they had gone through a messy break-up with a big fight and a lot of tears. 

in reality, it all happened on a thursday night after irene didn’t show up to their dinner reservation once again and that happened to be the final straw for seulgi. it was a simple “i’m done.” over a phone call that night. irene replied with “if that’s what you want.” and that was it. 

no raising of voices, no tears, and no feelings. it had been a long while that the feelings aspect of their relationship had been absent. they went about their own lives most days and started meeting up less and less. some days were better than others, but seulgi still grew tired of waiting around and trying to hold onto a relationship that irene could clearly live without. 

“look, i understand it is a lot i am asking for.” irene said calmly, hoping that her understanding tone could soothe seulgi’s irritation. “you don’t have to give me an answer immediately. how about-”

“i can give you an answer immediately.” seulgi cut her off and irene felt her eye twitch in annoyance. she hated being interrupted while speaking and usually, no one would dare to, but seulgi was different. “the answer is no.” 

~

the call came through two days later, lighting up her phone screen with the words ‘kang seulgi’. 

irene quickly closed her computer tabs that were on the social media profiles of some people she had dated briefly in the past before seulgi. the list was not extensive at all and her options were (embarrassingly) limited but she would never admit that to anyone.  

“miss kang.” irene greeted as she answered the call. 

“let’s get married.” seulgi said.

irene’s eyebrows raised in surprise and an amused smile tugged at her lips. “well, good evening to you too. what changed?” she swiveled around in her office chair, phone pressed to her ear. 

“don’t flatter yourself.” seulgi’s cold tone cut through the call. “i have my own reasons for going through with this arrangement. and like you said, it will be on my terms and my conditions, yes?”

“yes.” irene replied, turning serious so that she wouldn’t ruin her one chance of getting the inheritance. it was dangerous to give seulgi all of the power, but what damage could seulgi really do? she had enough wealth of her own, it was unlikely she would ask for any monetary compensation in the arrangement. perhaps seulgi’s intention was to gain some shares in bae enterprises or some business collaboration between their companies, but those were all small prices irene would be willing to pay if it meant she could own the entire company. 

“good.” seulgi said. “and we will have a contractual agreement?”

“yes. i can set up a meeting as soon as possible. you bring your lawyer, i’ll bring mine.” 

“good.” 

“good.” irene echoed, a satisfied smile forming on her face. it felt like the weight of her burdens was magically lifted off her and the inheritance now felt so close within her grasp. “i look forward to our joint venture.” 

“just one more thing before we go through with this.” seulgi said and irene felt a twinge of worry. “do you own a blue dress?” 

~

irene stood at the entrance to the five star hotel where the birthday party was taking place tonight. she glanced around, swallowing the nerves and brushed the silky material of her dress to make sure it didn’t crease in the wrong places. she wasn’t sure if ‘midnight blue’ was acceptable for the theme of the party but seulgi didn’t give her much to work with so she was going to have to deal with it.

she sent a text to ask where seulgi was, silently fuming that seulgi was making her turn up to this party alone when she wasn’t even technically invited. 

the moment she stepped into the ballroom, she could feel eyes on her and as she walked, she heard confused whispers between pairs and groups of people.

“i thought they were over?”

“didn’t they break up already?”

her irritation seemed to help sharpen her senses because her vision quickly locked on to a currently laughing seulgi standing across the room with two other women dressed in pretty pale blue dresses. picking up the hem of her dress slightly to support her rapid storming, she made her way over. 

“joohyun.” seulgi greeted, her previous cheerfulness dissipating instantly and she looked a bit tense. 

“irene! hi!” a cheerful voice saved seulgi from dealing with irene’s wrath just yet. 

“hello wendy,” irene plastered a smile on her face, accepting the friendly hug from seulgi’s cousin. “happy birthday!” she remembered to say as enthusiastically as possible.

“thank you! i was pleasantly surprised to hear from seul that you would be coming tonight. i had no idea you were back together again, but i am really happy for you both!” she said, returning to stand beside her wife, sooyoung who wrapped an arm around her waist. 

irene’s gaze met the taller woman’s and she managed a forced smile. they had never been too fond of each other, but sooyoung had been dating wendy since forever and they even recently got married, so she was now a permanent part of seulgi’s big family. 

“yes. thank you.” irene said before turning to seulgi. “can i speak to you? alone.” 

“sure.” seulgi placed her glass of champagne down on the table, giving the couple a smile before turning to walk with irene over to an area with less people around.  

“i can’t believe you told your entire family that we broke up.” irene seethed, doing her best to keep her voice down. 

“what?” seulgi’s brows furrowed. “i can’t talk to my family now? you are so ridiculous.” she scoffed. 

“it’s only been three months.” 

“yes and? some of us actually have good relationships with our families and update them on our lives.” 

“low blow.” irene scowled. 

“anyway, why do you think i asked you to come tonight?” seulgi glanced behind them to make sure they were still alone and out of earshot from the others. 

“because you didn’t want to be here alone like a loser?” 

seulgi’s glare could’ve sent any normal person crumbling, but irene wasn’t a normal person. 

“being here alone would be better than being with you.” seulgi responded, tone empty of emotion. “not that i would know, since you never attended social events with me in the past.” 

“excuse me?” irene was taken aback by the accusation. she had definitely (and begrudgingly) accompanied seulgi to parties and soirees and family gatherings before. granted, she did turn down or cancel on a few when it was during busier weeks. and granted, maybe the ‘few’ was more like ‘most of them’ but… 

seulgi cleared , standing up straighter. “if you want this arrangement to work out, you’ll have to convince my family that we’re back together. otherwise, they’ll be suspicious of a sudden marriage.” 

irene gritted her teeth to keep calm. not only did she have to attend this intimate gathering, now she had to put on a performance to make people think she was smitten for seulgi. could the night get any worse?

seulgi moved forward, startling irene slightly when she felt her hand lightly pulling at her waist and seulgi’s mouth beside her ear. 

“just think about that huge inheritance, miss bae joohyun.” she whispered before walking away. 

irene wasn’t sure why the ballroom suddenly felt warmer. 

~

“married life has been wonderful.” wendy gushed while the rest of seulgi’s cousins gushed over her diamond ring and the wedding photos that sooyoung was showing them on her phone. “what could be better than being married to your best friend, your soulmate, and being able to wake up next to them every morning of your life?” wendy continued, garnering ‘aww’s from the others. 

irene’s face was paling by the moment and seulgi shot her a look to remind her to control her expressions. 

“what about you, seul?” wendy asked, eyes sparkling with excitement. “a little birdie told me that you were discussing marriage with your parents earlier.” 

“what? you never mentioned this to us before!” yeji exclaimed, looking at seulgi with a betrayed expression. 

“ah, it’s still just an idea…” seulgi said sheepishly. “there are still a lot of things we need to sort out first, right babe?” she faked a sweet smile, putting a hand on irene’s knee. 

“i bet.” sooyoung muttered under her breath. 

irene put her hand on top of seulgi’s, returning the smile and doing her best to look like an adoring partner. “logistics-wise yes, but none of it really matters as long as i get to marry you.” she said. 

“aww stop! that is so sweet.” seulgi’s cousins squealed.  

seulgi gave her a smile but it looked more strained than before and the moment the others looked away, she removed her hand from irene’s. 

~

irene sighed, wishing she could stay inside the bathroom longer to avoid any more social interactions with seulgi’s friendly family members. it was such a stark contrast, the kang family and her own. irene never really knew how to comfortably interact with a family that had healthy relationships and communications with each other. 

not talking usually meant a good relationship with her family. talking meant something was wrong or there was a problem. growing up, she distanced herself a lot from others and never willingly spoke to her mother or confided in her for anything. she didn’t want to depend on anyone other than herself, so her relationship with her mother wasn’t like how most people expected. 

her mother never called her to ask how her day was or whether she had eaten lunch. the last time her mother called was when she was hysterical about losing her favourite pearl earring and wanted irene to call the family’s private investigator. 

irene reluctantly walked out of the bathroom, reminding herself the party would end soon. she was stopped near the entrance of the ballroom by a man in a navy suit, his eyes strikingly similar to seulgi’s. 

“irene. how nice to see you again.” 

“seungmin.” irene greeted her soon-to-be brother-in-law. “likewise.” 

“i heard seulgi brought you here tonight to discuss marriage plans with our parents.” seungmin stated, eyes flickering around the room before landing back on irene and he didn’t look convinced. “i was unaware that you were together again.” 

irene knew she had to speak carefully. seungmin and seulgi had always been close and he was known to be protective of his younger sister. 

“yes, it was only recently that we decided to be together again.” irene said with a confident and convincing smile. “i suppose seulgi wanted to wait until it was a little more certain before telling the family.” 

“possibly.” he agreed, taking a sip of his wine but his suspicious gaze never left her. “and so you have worked out all your issues, yes?” he asked. “all that stuff about putting work before the relationship, the mistrust, and the controlling? i do hope that is no longer the case.”

irene inhaled sharply because why did seulgi tell him so much?, and forced a polite smile. “i assure you, things are well between us now.” she lied. 

“well, good.” seungmin stated, a genuine smile finally forming on his face. “grandmother will be overjoyed to be able to see seulgi get married before she leaves.” 

“i-i’m sorry?” irene uttered, eyebrows furrowed with confusion.

seulgi’s brother raised an eyebrow in surprise, “oh you didn’t know? our grandmother is unwell, the doctors said she has about a few months left.” 

irene felt guilt striking her squarely in the chest. all this time she thought seulgi had some hidden agenda to take money or some other benefits from her by agreeing to her proposal. why didn’t seulgi tell her the real reason? 

~

“why should i have?” 

seulgi stood before her, gaze distant, lips pressed in a thin line. she looked pretty under the moonlight in her navy dress, with her hair falling in soft waves and for a moment, irene was reminded of how she felt that very first night she met her. 

they stood out in the gardens, surrounded by the sounds of faint music and the chatter of the party guests leaving the hotel.

“because i would’ve cared, i know how close you are to your grandparents and-” 

“let’s get one thing straight, irene.” seulgi interrupted her and irene flinched slightly at the sound of that name coming out of seulgi’s mouth. she didn’t call her ‘joohyun’ like she always did. 

“we’re not real. we’re not fiancées, not girlfriends, not even friends.” seulgi said. “so you don’t have to pretend to care about me or my life.” 

“seulgi-” irene was stunned by the unexpected harshness. “can’t we at least be friends if we are going to do this?” 

“this is just business, irene.” seulgi said strictly. “and i thought i already made it clear to you that we can’t be friends.” 

irene bit her inner cheek, masking the hurt. she didn’t know seulgi hated her that much for their break-up. she was under the impression that they had both lost feelings and remained in the relationship out of habit until seulgi decided it was a waste of time to stay. she also had a small theory that seulgi found someone new which made her decide to leave, but seeing as seulgi was here agreeing to marry her, she assumed that the new affair didn’t last long. 

“fine by me.” she said, nonchalant, but she had her hands balled in fists beside her. “business is business. i will see you in my office at 10am tomorrow.” 

“i will see you then.” seulgi gave her a single nod. 

irene turned to leave, letting out a long exhale once she was far enough. 

what a long night. but at least it was over and at least seulgi’s parents gave them their blessings to get married after seulgi convinced them she was happy with irene.

now all she had to do was get her name down on the marriage certificate and bae enterprises would be all hers. 

as for seulgi, she wouldn’t have to see her again after the documentation and contracts were settled. after all, there was no law saying they had to live together just because they were married. 

~

the two of them sat silently at the dining table, eating their dinner without exchanging any words just like every other night since they moved in. 

it was written in the contract as part of seulgi’s terms and conditions that they lived together for as long as their marriage arrangement lasted. irene, of course, resisted against it but seulgi fought back, saying she couldn’t let her family find out this was all fake. 

“it would break their hearts to find out i am lying to them.” she had said. 

irene begrudgingly accepted the terms of the contract after they clarified separate bedrooms, separate living routines, separate cars, and every other possible detail that could define the boundaries.

they had never lived together before and irene was nervous about having another person in her space after having lived alone for the majority of her life. thankfully, with their financial situation and with irene now owning the family’s multi-billion dollar company, they were able to buy a property large enough for them to co-exist without crossing each other’s boundaries too often. 

their first month was relatively peaceful, with very minimal interactions and conversations. 

but it didn’t take long for old habits to resurface. 

irene glanced at seulgi who was scrolling on her phone while eating. she cleared slightly. “where did you go last night?” she asked, remembering that seulgi returned home rather late. 

seulgi glanced up from her phone briefly, “went to a whisky bar.” she answered. 

there a moment of silence with irene’s brows furrowing before she couldn’t help herself from asking, “with who?” 

seulgi’s chopsticks landed on her plate with a loud clatter accompanied with a frustrated sigh and her gaze was piercing as she looked at irene across the large table. “you are doing this again.”

“doing what?” irene asked, surprised. “i’m just making conversation.” 

“save me the excuses, irene. i know you don’t care to be friends.” seulgi said. “you just can’t help yourself, can you? it’s in your nature to be controlling.” 

“i’m not being controlling.” irene tried to say but seulgi was already too pissed off to regard her. 

“you have no right to control what i do or who i see. i don’t belong to you.” 

“i know that.” irene snapped, growing irritated. “you remind me enough times. every ing day.” 

“seems like it’s not enough.” seulgi responded, anger burning in her eyes. “since you are still acting the same way you used to.”

“really?” irene threw her hands up in the air in disbelief, sitting back in her chair heavily. “you want to bring that up now?” 

“maybe i do, irene! given that you never once had the time for a real conversation.” seulgi’s voice was growing louder and irene clenched her jaw in annoyance. was it too much to ask for a quiet night? 

“okay, is that what you want? a real conversation.” irene challenged. “then let’s start by talking about all the people you were seeing while we were still in a relationship.”

“what are you saying?” seulgi asked, voice laced with frustration and disbelief. “i was never seeing anyone else.” 

“save your lies, seulgi. i don’t even care anymore that you were.” irene said coldly, crossing her arms. 

“see, this is exactly why i couldn’t deal with you anymore! you always have this preconceived idea that i would cheat on you and you believe it so deeply that you start seeing it even when it is not there. you have never truly trusted me, and no matter what i did to prove to you that i was faithful, you would always find some way to believe otherwise.” 

“seulgi, you were always out somewhere with someone. you were always at parties and people’s houses, and you would spend the night in different places, what was i supposed to think?” 

“maybe about the fact that i was always out with other people because my own girlfriend never had time to spend with me.” 

“ah, so it’s my fault that you had to cheat? alright.” irene scoffed, turning her head to the side defiantly.

“that’s not what i said.” seulgi's voice had receded in volume but somehow that was scarier than when she had her voice raised. “if anything, maybe you were just projecting on me.” 

“what?” irene narrowed her eyes. 

seulgi looked her in the eye. “the amount of times you canceled our plans for ‘work’ and the amount of times you stayed back late at the office - maybe there was another reason for that.” 

irene felt a new emotion bubbling up inside of her. an emotion that not even ‘anger’ could suffice in describing. yes, admittedly she had not been the most present or doting or affectionate girlfriend ever, but the one thing that no one should ever doubt was her loyalty. 

“i cannot believe you are accusing me of having an affair.” she seethed. 

“maybe the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.” 

“i would never be like him. you know how much i hate him and what he did.” irene’s voice trembled slightly with the overwhelming emotions. 

“and so you should know that i would never do what he did to you.” seulgi responded immediately, eyes ablaze with determination. 

“how was i meant to believe that?” 

“by trusting me.” 

irene scoffed out a laugh and seulgi’s expression darkened. the scrape of the chair against the floor pierced the silence as seulgi stood up abruptly. 

“this was a mistake.” she muttered angrily before leaving the dining room. irene sat unmoving in her chair, chest rising and falling as she took deep breaths to calm herself down. she pushed her plate away from her, having lost all appetite, and caught sight of the ring on her fourth finger that made her feel a mixture of confusing feelings. 

was this even worth it? maybe seulgi was right that this was a mistake. it was a stupid idea to think that they could co-exist peacefully as exes. the emotions that they never expressed to each other during their relationship were now finally spilling and irene did not like that. she wasn’t someone who felt many emotions, so she definitely did not enjoy dealing with others’ emotions. 

she let out a heavy exhale, slumping back on her chair. 

still four and a half months left.  

~

to celebrate every new year, the kang family had a tradition to gather and prepare a big feast together. it was a joyous event and filled with fond memories from seulgi’s childhood. she always loved being with her entire family and the self-made food always seemed to taste better. 

“do i have to go?” irene asked, not taking her eyes off the tablet that she was reading a contract on. 

seulgi sighed, “yes.” she said. “you’ve never attended in the past, which was somewhat excusable, but now that it’s the first new year since we’ve been married, they expect you to be there.” 

irene let out a breath, refraining from an obvious groan. 

“remember my terms.” seulgi said. 

“i remember.” irene responded with a bit of snappiness as she took her glasses off and pinched the bridge of her nose in annoyance. “fine. it’s just a dinner right?” 

seulgi frowned a little at irene’s lack of knowledge about one of the most important traditions in her family. “it starts in the afternoon. we prepare and cook all our dishes ourselves before eating together.”

“great.” irene muttered under her breath. her nonexistent cooking experience would definitely come in use. “why not just get the chefs to do it?” 

“it’s called spending time together.” seulgi replied, “which i understand is a foreign concept to you.”

“alright.” irene said, putting her glasses back on and resuming her reading to signal to seulgi that the conversation was over. 

seulgi huffed, rolling her eyes slightly as she walked away from irene’s study to go back to her room. 

~

irene wasn’t exactly familiar with happy and warm family gatherings that involved a lot of hugging and chatting. 

still, she put on her best act, walking into seulgi’s family home beside seulgi as if they hadn’t just argued in the car on the way there. 

she gifted her in-laws with an extravagant fruit basket and lied about their happy married life when asked. 

she was then dragged around by seulgi, greeting each of her aunties and uncles. they were nice and easy enough to fool, but the two of them were worried about talking to seulgi’s second aunt who was known to be very observant and could see right through people. 

“how has it been, adapting to living together and having someone in your space all the time?” the second aunt asked with a chuckle. 

“not too bad.” seulgi replied casually with a confident smile. “i’ve always had people in my space anyway. if anything, it’s better that it’s my wife and not my idiot brother.” 

“i heard that!” seungmin shouted from behind them, making seulgi and her aunt snicker. 

“what about you, irene?” the elder asked, looking at irene and the attentive gaze made irene feel flustered. “is your family very big?” 

“no, not really.” irene answered. 

“any siblings?”

“uh…” irene shifted her feet and seulgi glanced at her with a hint of worry. “no, i didn’t grow up with siblings.” irene answered after a beat. it wasn’t a lie. 

“i see.” the aunt nodded pensively and it worried irene that she looked so serious. had she figured something out?

“well, hopefully you don’t find it too noisy with our big family then!” she joked, chuckling warmly and irene forced a smile and a nod, relieved that she didn’t ask further. 

“it’s really nice. the family and…spending time together.” irene said. 

seulgi cleared , unable to deal with irene’s awkward attempt at pretending to like these events. “excuse us, we should go and say hi to the kids.” she pulled irene’s wrist and brought them away from the woman, both of them letting out a sigh of relief as they escaped. 

seulgi had too many cousins to keep count of, but a fair share of them had moved out of the country for studies or work. wendy was the same age and the closest to seulgi, but seulgi also had a close relationship with her younger cousins. 

irene found it a little amusing how the younger ones greeted seulgi warmly and casually but then formally greeted her with a slight bow. she could tell they weren’t entirely comfortable with her, which was understandable since she never had the chance to get to know them. 

she made an excuse about getting a drink so that seulgi could comfortably catch up with her cousins and she walked off by herself to find the table with a variety of drinks and snacks set out. 

after picking a bottle of barley tea, she saw someone approaching and looked up to see the woman with a wide smirk on her face. 

“what a pleasant surprise, the legendary irene bae finally decided to show up.” sooyoung said. 

“hello sooyoung.” irene greeted politely, choosing to ignore the slight. 

“haven’t seen you since the wedding.” sooyoung said. 

“it’s been a busy time at the company.” irene replied curtly. 

“yeah i bet.” sooyoung said and irene felt mildly irritated by the attitude. she couldn’t quite understand why but it had always felt like sooyoung had something against her. 

“i just hope you’re making time for your wife.” sooyoung said.

ah. irene thought. i guess that’s