PROLOGUE

 

668 C.E

 

The Kingdom of Silla is  filled with grief.

News travelled like wildfire. The anguished guttural scream that resonated from the palace walls was telling.

The queen consort is dead.

People whispered, keeping a watchful eye on the soldiers, and the dark rumor lived on.

The queen consort is dead.

It is a clear, sunny day but for Hyoseong of Silla, the sun, moon, and stars have fallen down upon him. His weeping echoed, loud and deep and raw in painful harmony with the sharp cries of the mitely bundle that was once wanted but now scanted.

He grabs his queen’s hand, cradles it gingerly against his cheek. Coldness have replaced its warmth and it stings.

He had made a promise as a young prince; to make this woman his one and only queen, his one and only love. The promise was fulfilled. But the payment is hefty. It costed her life.            

“Your highness,” somebody called in a comforting tone that did nothing to ease his pain.

“The straight, upright tree is the first to be cut down.” he choked out.  

The moment of silence is broken by the shrill cries from the bundle cradled in the nook of a court lady’s arms trying her best to hush the little tyke without luck. Shattered shrieks got louder and louder like the sound of a vase being broken over and over.

Tension rose along with the king. Everyone held their breath as he stood motionless yet visibly trembling.

“With the power bested upon me, I, Hyoseong of Silla, banish that monstrosity from this kingdom.” he announced, voice booming and cynical without a hint of remorse he once had and the royal scribe scrambles to write it down. “I exile that thing to the ends of this world! For committing the unpardonable sin of murdering the queen. It shall never again step foot inside the Kingdom of Silla lest I lift its exile.” he turns to the maidservant, expression chilling. “Get that thing out of mine sight!”

She hastily bowed and scrambled out of the chamber. Everybody watched in stunned silence as they witness their once wise and honorable king turn into someone else, someone who eerily resembled the monarchs ere him with the madness softly seeping in his eyes, the perpetual wink of a lover permanently breaking something inside.

“Your highness,” someone called again. It’s the Sangdaedung, “Perhaps you should reconsider. Never draw your sword to kill a fly. The little one had done nothing—”

“Nothing? Nothing?!” the king bellowed, “Look at mine queen and say to me, ulje, does that look like nothing?”

He bowed in penance. “Forgive me, your highness. I did not intend to be insensitive. I am merely pleading for you to see reason and not to compose decisions rashly—”

“You overstep yourself, Sangdaedung.” The king cut him off and if looks could kill, he would’ve dropped dead then and there. “I am the king. And the king’s words are law.”

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

She is a princess.

At least, that’s what they made her believe.

All her days, Seo Jihye had been called and treated as one.

But what exactly does it mean to be a princess?

As she grew, she had accumulated all the knowledge the palace was able to provide and had come up of the definition of a princess. A princess is a daughter of a king and a queen who rules over a certain kingdom. The Shah definitely wasn’t her father and Persia wasn’t her kingdom.

It is somewhere down the east. A lovely kingdom named Silla. Her handmaid had told her when she brought it up.

Is mine father king there? She had asked, way too young and oblivious that her existence is a sham.

The woman had hesitated, eyes shifting from side to side, Yes. Thy father is the King of Silla.

And later as she grew up, she discovers that that same king who was supposed to be her father had banished her from her kingdom, exiled her to the faraway lands of Persia.

She is a princess.

A princess who is not accepted in her own kingdom, is not accepted by her own father and is shunned by her own people.

She was enlightened of her sin when she overheard her guards talking. She understood. It was a sad sin. Her mother’s life was taken in exchange of her own.  She could not remember how she did it, but she had killed the queen.

By then she had stopped wondering, stopped thinking, stopped yearning. This is a punishment well deserved. Staying in Persia was not even enough to be considered a punishment. The Shah and Shahbanu were hospitable and even let her reside in the palace as their guest, though she wagers it’s nothing personal and purely to remain friendly with their traffic jointress.

She is a princess. Yet as time passes by she slowly starts thinking it’s an existence akin to a curse.

They left her alone, most of the time, and so she had the freedom to do whatever she wants. But her handmaiden wouldn’t let her. She made her read, memorize, and rewrite the principles of Confucius and other people she does not know. She’s only free at nightfall and so she spent it wandering about the shores of the beach.

Today is just like any other day. She spent her morning stuck in her loom, weaving an image her maidservant had told her about Silla. During the afternoon, she sat at the balcony of her chamber in the palace, sneakily reading one of those Greek epics stuck between her scrolls.

At night, she sneaked out of the palace with silks to gild her brow and she headed straight to the sea hold, but for a short walk behind the palace.

Jihye likes the sea at night. There is no scorching traveling lamp to sear her skin, the breeze cool and pleasant. And there were the handsome stars and the moon, suspended over the black dome that the Greeks apparently believed was a god named Ouranos. She sometimes chuckles to herself when reading those stories, yet admittedly, she’s not quite sure whether she receives it or not. She but finds them fascinating, nonetheless.

Yet tonight is not just like any other night. As she sat on a rock with the soft waves lapping beneath, she is too immersed in searching for constellations in the sky that she completely missed the personification of beauty emerging from the sea.

“What is a lady like you doing out here on this brave night?”

The unexpected voice surprised Jihye so much she jolted hard, slipped, and then she’s falling. She’s so sure she’s going to hit her head and die but then an arm was suddenly around her waist, the scent of balsam and cinnamon flooding her nose.

She looks up. Her heart stops.

The lady was no doubt the most beautiful lady the eye had ever beheld. Jihye failed to find words that can encompass the sheer magnificence of this lady whose face seemed to become more and more beautiful the longer she stares.

It was impossible to tell the color of her eyes; they shimmered, shifting from brown to grey to green to blue but constantly having that suppressed playfulness. She could not make out the color of her hair either but what she can tell is this lady is beautiful beyond words. The word ‘beautiful’ truly could not do her justice.

“Um,” she stuttered stupidly, too lost in the stranger’s eyes. “I…”

The lady tutted in disapproval, eyes glinting in mischief. “Too clumsy for a princess, are we not?” she chided before assisting Jihye to sit properly again. Her sultry voice washed over her, pulling her into a daze.

“Th-Th-Thank you.”

When she managed to tear her eyes off the stranger, she willed herself to not look upon her again. She had the feeling that if she partakes in some more of that perfection, she shall fall deep in her spell.

A spell. There’s got to be some trick about this lady. She might not but be a mirage. An illusion. She cannot possibly be real.

A scoff made her flinch again and the hand that went to her shoulder to still her was automatic. The touch sent alarming shivers down her spine.

“You regard my beauty as a trick? You think it unreal? That I am a mere apparition?” the lady demanded, leaning down and sticking her face to Jihye’s in all her gorgeous glory, eyes flashing pink. “How dare you?”

“Uhh…” Jihye stammered again like a simpleminded fool, finding it difficult to hold on to a thought with the dizzying fragrance tickling her nose. “I-I am sorry,” she fared, the Old Persian tongue suddenly difficult to speak. “I mean not to offend you.” she said, forgetting to question how the lady knew that she was thinking of that.

She sniffed indignantly and even when the way her brows scrunch together is pretty. “Do you not know me?”

Jihye shook her head.

Irritation disappeared from the lady’s face and was replaced by a hint of curiosity. She eyed her, head to toe, and the longer she stared the hotter Jihye’s face felt.

“You are not of here.” she decided. “You feel different in a way that I strangely cannot pinpoint. That is odd. I usually can see a person’s entire life and their heart’s desire in a glance.”

Jihye blinked rapidly, not following. She definitely was warned about talking to suspicious strangers at night but she found herself asking, “What do you mean?”

“There is a barrier that blocks me from knowing all about you and it is because you are not of this world.” the lady tilted her head to the side, eyeing her curiously. “Who are you? And from whence hath you come from?

“I am not going to tell you that.” Jihye did not know where the audacity came from but she sat some few straighter, defiantly sticking up her chin. She’s a dignified lady and she’s not going to let this random stranger push her around like that. “I got here first and never owe you any answers.”

The lady raised a brow, out of amusement more than aught if the little smirk on her lips was any indication. “You got here first, huh?”

“Yes, I did. And I am not going to answer any of your questions without knowing who you are.”

Her little smirk widened into a full-blown, dazzling lopsided grin. “Oh, but honey, I think you already do.”

Epiphany came like the flash of thunder-stone. For the first time, she took in the lady’s complete appearance without being distracted by her beauty.

She wore a white gossamer dress that rippled mesmerizingly in the soft sea breeze. A myrtle wreath adorned her flowing tresses. Her ears were ornamented with flowers and her soft, sweet neck adorned with golden and jeweled necklaces. An intricate golden girdle around her waist.

And she’s glowing. Literally.

Jihye felt her jaw drop. The unearthly beauty, the ability to see the heart’s desire in a glance, the power that rippled around her…

She couldn’t quite believe it even as she said it.

“You are Aphrodite, goddess of love and beauty.”

 

 

 

The following night, the goddess arrived before she did.

As soon as Jihye saw the exquisite, glowing figure seated on top of that rock, she debated if she should retreat and return to the palace instead.

She was about to do just that when Aphrodite spoke. “Well, well, I have come first, tonight.” she slightly turned her head, just enough for Jihye to know she’s talking to her. “Are you going to run away again, little girl?”

She froze, feeling her ears grow hot. After blurting out her realization of the lady’s identity last night, she had panicked and dashed back into the palace, hoping that what happened was merely a figment of her imagination.

Yet, well, seeing the goddess’s delicate silhouette tonight right before her eyes proves it all real.

Oh dear lord.                            

Earlier that day, she had abandoned her loom and spent the entire morrow and after noon reading everything she can find regarding the love goddess to make sure if it really was her the previous  night. It all did not add up. Some accounts had claimed she had a cascade of dark ringlets. Others witnessed her with tresses of gold. There were even testimonies of the goddess having locks of fiery red.

Jihye…well, she sees her tonight with flowing dark hair, silky strands gently flying with the breeze.

“Come.” Aphrodite patted the space next to her. “Sit with me.”

If the books were accurate, then displeasing goddess would not be a good idea. Jihye did not like her chances of being turned into an insect if she does ever so a mite incur her wrath therefore she obediently went to sit beside her, settling on the edge, as far as possible.

“I see that you are enlightened.” Aphrodite remarked, a playful lilt in her tone. “Are you going to answer mine questions now that you know who I am?”

Jihye failed to hold back a scoff. “Do I have a choice?”

Fortunately, the temperamental goddess did not take offense. She chuckled in amusement. “Well then, who are you, Seo Jihye?”

Jihye turned in a snap, “How did you know my name?”

Aphrodite rolled her eyes, “Oh, please. Grant me some credit. I am a goddess of the Greek pantheon, an Olympian. I am bound to at least know that.” she said. “Tell me something I do not  know, little dove. Who are you?”

She has a point. Jihye bit her lower lip, wondering where she should start. “I am a princess of a kingdom called  Silla. It is a land in the east, along the silk road.”

“What was it like?”

“It is a world where people will cut off your nose and eat it if you close your eyes.”

She could feel the goddess’s eyes on her but she kept her gaze fixed on the lapping waves. “I was banished from my kingdom as soon as I was born.” she admitted. “My mother, the queen, died upon birthing me. The king sentenced me to be exiled and never to return to Silla lest he says so for causing her death.”

Aphrodite stayed silent for too long so Jihye turned to look upon her only to meet the goddess’s eyes. Her cheeks flushed, heart skipping a beat.

“You really need to do something about your complexion.”

Jihye glared at her. “Were you even listening?”

Aphrodite shrugged, “You look chalky, honey. Those dark circles are horrible. Let me fix that.” she snapped her fingers and Jihye did not particularly feel different but the goddess nodded in satisfaction. “Much better.”

Jihye cupped her cheeks. It felt softer. “Please do not do that again.”

Aphrodite pulled a face and even the way her face distorted was beautiful. “Kings have always been full of skatá.”

“Full of what?”

“. They’re full of .” she deadpanned. “Do you not speak Greek?”

“I do. But I am not well versed in…profanities.”

“If that’s the case then I shall gladly educate you. Kings—men in general, actually—are also a load of koprophagos, a bunch of metrokoites. Lord Zeus, especially, is the perfect example of that.”

Jihye laughed as the thunder rumbled despite the clear sky. Aphrodite yelled to the heavens, “What? It’s true!”

“I thought you like men.” Jihye pointed out.

Aphrodite shrugged daintily. “True, I do. But just because they are amusing to play with in bed does not mean they are any less of a mothering -eater.”

Jihye winced. She did not know what those meant but they didn’t sound pretty. “I do not think the king of the gods would take your insults well.”

The goddess did not look concerned. “He will be fine. I did not say anything wrong. Did I, Lord Zeus?” she smiled sweetly at the sky. It remained silent.

“Then, can I tell you what I think of you?”

Aphrodite looked upon her through thick, dark, curled lashes. Her red lips stretching into a knowing smirk. “Yes? And what is it that you think of me, little dove?”

“Geotman beonjireureuhago silseuki eobseumeul ireuneun mal.”

Aphrodite’s haughty expression made way for a puzzled one and Jihye found it rather adorable, the way those color-shifting eyes widened and blinked repeatedly in confusion.

“A wild apricot with a beautiful color.” she translated, “I think you are a wild apricot with a beautiful color.”

The confidence returned to the goddess’s face, smug and conceited as she flipped her hair. “Of course, I am.”

Jihye burst into laughter.

 

***

 

The next night, Jihye had to deal with a pouty, sulking goddess.

“I found out what you mean by that.” Aphrodite said as soon as Jihye reached her side. She’s sitting on the sand today, hugging her knees to her chest and partially hiding her face behind it with a knit on her brows as she refused to look upon her.

Jihye did not expect that she would still be there but she quickly got over her surprise and settled beside her on the soft beach, watching the tide join and hie.  

“What I mean by what?”

“A wild apricot with a beautiful color.” Aphrodite muttered. “It is used to describe something seems good towards the without, yet is lacking towards the inside, is it not?”

Jihye held back a smile. “How did you figure it out?”

“I was bragging to Athena that somebody bid me a wild apricot with a beautiful color because it sounds as a compliment, every sentence that has the word ‘beautiful’ in it always sounds like a compliment. And she laughed at my face.” Aphrodite pouted. “Did you know how humiliating that was? Gods, I am so going to get even with that goddess. Oh, do quit laughing. Maybe I should turn you into an apricot and make Athena fall in love with you then you can have many wild apricot babies.”

Jihye tried to suppress a laugh. “Should I start groveling for your forgiveness?”

Aphrodite did not budge. Jihye shook her head. She could not believe a whole goddess who had lived on for centuries was acting like a baby.

“Look,” she scooted closer until their shoulders touched. She carefully drew on the sand with her forefinger, lines crossing and intersecting.

“What are you doing?” Aphrodite asked, intrigued enough to peek out from behind her knees.

“Writing.”

“What language is that?”

“Sillan.” she retracted her finger and eyed her work. Not a bad calligraphy on sand.

愛

Aphrodite examined it with interest. “What does it mean?”

“It is read as ae.” Jihye looked upon her and their eyes met, those multicolored irises shifting in the moonlight. “Meaning, love.”

Aphrodite continued to stare into her soul. Her intense gaze rendered Jihye helpless. Helpless to her charms, her natural allure. She felt like she’s being pulled. Where exactly, she had no idea. But something churns inside, burning. A kindle of light. Mitely and flickering.

She tried not to think of what would befall when it grows into a wildfire.

“I swear to the gods, if you’re making fun of me again I’ll turn you into an apricot and feed you to the crows.”

Jihye laughs. “I’m not. You can check with your friend Athena if you want.”

“We are not friends.” Aphrodite snapped before she tentatively held out her finger, dipping it in the sand, and started trying to copy Jihye’s calligraphy.

“No, you are doing it wrong.” she never dreamed of a day she would tell those words to a goddess but there it is. She grabbed her hand, guiding it into the proper . “They did not make you the goddess of art for good reason, huh?”

“Oh, shut your mouth.” Aphrodite retorted.

Jihye spent the rest of the night teaching her other hanja characters like the letters to her own name, getting sand stuck in their nails, and laughing at Aphrodite complaining about it. The goddess even helped her find constellations in the sky, though it’s apparent that she cares nothing about the twinkling little things and just made up random shapes like hearts and flowers and doves that looked nothing like doves but she insisted. Apparently, a goddess’s words are law.

When the sky starts to get brighter, Jihye realized just how long they had been staying out.

“I must return to the palace.” she stood, dusting sand from her clothes.

“Must you go?”

Something in her voice, something in those beautiful eyes that looked upon her pleadingly made Jihye hesitate. She gathered her willpower to muster an apologetic smile. “I shall return here to-morrow. Same time, same place.”

Aphrodite held her gaze for a while before nodding somberly. Jihye smiled. “I shall see you tomorrow, my lady.”

She started to walk away but a hand suddenly grabbed hers.

“Wait.”

She turned to face the goddess who got to her feet and towered over her. Jihye gave her a quizzical look but Aphrodite just opened the palm of her free hand. Glittering, pink light swirled. Glowing tendrils weaving and overlapping, until suddenly she’s bearing a rose.

Aphrodite stepped close, her fragrance making Jihye lightheaded. The goddess tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear, fingers briefly brushing sensitive skin. She inhaled sharply at the contact, fighting down a shiver. Aphrodite smiled.

It’s not one of those teasing, lopsided grins. It’s small but powerful. The churning in Jihye’s gut intensified.

“I refuse to be the one left behind.” her smile grows into its usual alluring mischief. “I shall see you tomorrow, my little dove.”

She tapped Jihye’s nose softly before her whole body started glowing and glowing, getting real bright that Jihye had to look away and shut her eyes. When she opened them as the light ceased, she’s standing at the beach alone.

She stared at the space Aphrodite used to occupy, her sweet scent still lingering in the air, the stalk of the rose she stuck behind her ear suddenly heavy.

She is once again slapped hard by reality. Should she had any doubts of the goddess’s existence, all of them disappeared along with that blinding white flash.

She really is the Aphrodite.

Oh, skatá.

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

Days passed by in a blur but the nights were clear and memorable.

Spending time with Aphrodite by the beach had become the new norm and they have grown closer and, Jihye would dare say, even became friends. They would sit there all night, talking about everything and nothing, writing hanja and Greek obsceneties on the sand, trying to count the stars, and making new constellations.

Aphrodite would rail about her day, about puny mortals and annoying gods and she would tattle about those juicy gossips going around about heroes and nymphs and Jihye would patiently listen. In return, the goddess would tolerate tracing constellations on the sky despite finding it boring and tasteless but she does it anyway and Jihye thinks it sweet of her.

During mornings to afternoons, she’s been stuck on her loom.  A spark of inspiration fueled her limbs to weaving colorful threads together and create an imitation of beauty that she knew can never come close to the real thing. She but does it anyway, with more dedication and effort than anything she had ever done before.

It’s the same today. She was so immersed in her work that she did not notice the sun dipping in the horizon, the blue sky transcending into orange and finally into purple dusk.

But she did not fail to see the dark starry sky. She stood up as soon as she saw the moon rise above the turret and grabbed her silks.

However, just as she was halfway outside the window for her escape route, the door opened and she froze, one leg suspended without, the other grounded in her room.

“Your highness, what are you doing?”

She let out a sigh of relief. It’s just her handmaid. “Aji, do you not know how to announce yourself before entering mine chamber?” she asked, exasperated.

“I apologize, your highness. I simply thought you were already asleep. Yet it seems you are not.” the woman frowned, “What are you doing in that compromising position, if I may ask?”

Sarcasm coated her polite words and Jihye sighed again. Aji had raised her and is more like her mother than a maid. She was a court lady back with the rank of bomo sanggung back in Silla and was the one ordered to take Jihye to Persia.

“Well,” she folded her hands primly, trying to look coy. It was difficult to pull off with her other feet still sticking outside the window but she tried her best. “I was merely—“

“Are you going somewhere?”

“Oh, no, no. Of course not. That is ridiculous. Where would I go?” she laughed it off. “I am merely checking if the air without is pleasant enough.”

“With your foot?”

“Yes. With my foot.”

Aji narrowed her eyes. “And is your foot finding the air without pleasant enough, your highness?”

“Uh…yes, it is of a fine, um, temperature.” she awkwardly brings her foot back in. “What brings you here, aji?”

“I was just going to check in on you because I was worried you would never be apart from your loom,” the woman said. “But then my worry appears to be unnecessary, is it not?”

Jihye swallowed. “I was, um, going to rest right after...checking the air.”

Aji gave her a who-are-you-trying-to-fool look and went to close the window. Jihye slowly sat on her bed. “You must not go out at night, princess. It is not safe.”

“But it’s not like the king would care about what happens to me, will he?”

“You must not speak like that.” she chided. “Come, your highness. I will take you to the baths so afterward you may go straight to sleep.”

“I shall bathe here.”

“You promise you would not be sneaking out?”

“I promise.”

“Very well then. I shall say to the servants to draw you a bath.” Aji bowed, walking backward and exiting the room.

Jihye sighed and went to open the window. The placement of the stars told her it’s already late. She wondered if Aphrodite is at the beach, waiting. She felt bad. How can she send a message, some signal to let her know—

Oh, right. It’s a goddess she’s dealing with. Prayers would work. Convenient.

She closed her eyes and whispered to the air. “Um…Lady Aphrodite? I hope you’re listening. Talking on mine own is odd enough so I hope I’m not doing this in vain. I do not need to burn a sacrifice to get your attention, do I? That would be messy. It will be difficult to sneak out tonight so I might not be able to—”

“Your bath is here, your highness.” a muffled voice announced outside and servants rushed in carrying a tub of smoking hot water, a partition divider, bath oils, and linen towels.

They started to help remove her apparel but she stopped them. “I will do it myself. Thank you.”

The servants bowed and took their leave but aji lingered, placing her sleeping robes on the bed and eyeing her like don’t even think about it. “Rest well, then, your highness.” she bowed and left.  

As soon as she was alone in the room, she fell limp on her bed. Did Aphrodite hear her prayer? Was that even considered a prayer? Well, she was talking to a goddess so technically it should be a prayer. She hoped the goddess heard it. If she didn’t, it might cause a misunderstanding that wouldn’t end well for Jihye.

A dove landed on her windowsill. The bird reminded her of Aphrodite, how she always called her ‘my little dove’ wearing that slanted and teasing smile of hers.

She closed her eyes and groaned in irritation. Since when did her thoughts become plagued with Aphrodite, Aphrodite, and Aphrodite?

“Glad I take up the maximum space in your head, though my rightful throne should be in your heart.”

Jihye shot to her feet, wide eyes looking at the newcomer casually perched on the windowsill. Aphrodite looked like she’s been there forever with her legs casually crossed, the slit of her chiton exposing the entire length of her right leg in all its toned, flawless glory.

Aphrodite snapped her fingers. “Eyes up here, dove.”

Jihye instantly rips her eyes away. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to—”

The goddess chuckled and waved her off. “Oh, please. It’s fine. I like being looked at. Especially when I like who is looking.” she winked.   

Jihye’s face burnt. Why is she being like this? Is she doing this on purpose? She’s definitely doing it on purpose. She’s much too aware of her effect to not do this on purpose.

“Wh-What are you doing here?”

Aphrodite pouted, twirling a lock of her hair, “You made me wait. So I took the liberty to come and visit you. Maybe punish you a little…” she grinned predatorily.

Jihye was alarmed. Being punished didn’t sound good. She didn’t want to turn into an apricot. “I-I told you about it! Did you not hear? I called to you. You should have heard that. That’s, like, your job.”

Aphrodite shrugged. “I did. Your rambling was annoying. Like a mosquito stuck in my ear.”

She started making her way towards her. Jihye backed up until she hit the wall. The goddess kept advancing until she’s painfully close. Deft fingers fiddled with the ribbon of her top, lips curled and eyes glinting.

Jihye found it hard to breathe. She refused to meet the goddess’s gaze and trained her eyes on her neck instead. It’s not a very good idea so she tried to focus on her necklace. It’s gold and shiny and nice.

A warm hand cupped her jaw and tilted her head up, forcing her to look into Aphrodite’s color-shifting eyes. Tonight, they’re a shade darker and the sight made her swallow thickly.

“Eyes on me, dove. I get jealous easily.”

It was all way too much, like a team of stallions running her over. Everything around them is a blur, everything except the goddess who smiled down at her like a gift from the heavens. She failed to notice the surroundings but was completely aware of the dizzying fragrance of balsam and cinnamon, of the thumb leisurely caressing her cheek, of the way those pupils dilate like a black hole her in.

She felt like she’s a star suspended on the sky. A weightless cloud, floating aimlessly. 

Like she’s enthralled, entangled in the mesmerizing webs of magic.

Magic.

She tried to snap out of it but it was difficult to fight especially with the magic herself wrapping her in that thick intoxicating fragrance with those supple lips right before her eyes, encouraging her forward.

She stood her ground, wrists physically clenched as she tried to hold on to the last strings of discipline and morality.

Come on. Move. Push her away. Do it! Do—oh dear lord.

It really isn’t easy to deny this goddess. Those lips are suddenly on her skin, lazily leaving a trail of butterfly kisses from her cheek down to her jaw, every touch sending a tingle down her spine. Those lips reach her neck and she inhaled sharply, eyes rolling to the back of her head. Oh.

“Wh…” her tongue felt like cotton. “W-What are you doing?”

“What do you think?” Aphrodite whispered, her raspy voice and warm breath against her neck making her shiver. “You’re smarter than that, Seo Jihye.”

“I…I need to bathe…”

“Perfect then.” Aphrodite snapped her fingers and her clothes fell to the floor in a heap.

Jihye gasped, outrage clearing the intoxicated fog in her mind and embarrassment coloring her cheeks as her arms flew to cover herself. “What are you—”

Aphrodite detached herself from her, grabbed her wrist, and dragged her to the tub. “I’ll lend you a hand.”

“But—”

“You said you need to bathe.” she winked.

Well, yes, she did. Now that she thought about it, it was a stupid thing to blurt out.

She eased into the tub with uncertainty. The water have gone cold now but that problem was short-lived because all Aphrodite had to do was snap her fingers and the temperature rose to a pleasant degree, petals floating around, a divine scent of magical goddess bath oils filling the room.

She took off her magical girdle and untied her chiton, the fine linen falling to the ground like a rippling wave of white and revealing the goddess’s glorious body.

Jihye have seen statues, carved after the likeness of these gods but those pale in comparison. Her jaw hung agape, mind rendered speechless at such profound beauty that earth does not deserve displayed before her. Every curve of her body spelled perfection. It was art and real life merged into one glorious mirage.

Aphrodite gave her a knowing smirk and before she knew it, she’s stepping into the tub, settling right beside her.

“Loosen up, my little dove. Why are you so stiff?” Aphrodite purred into her ear. Her arm curled around her shoulders, deft fingers massaging tense muscles.

Jihye squeezed her eyes shut, trying not to mind the feeling of their bare legs entangled underwater and its weird effects. “W-Why are you being like this?”

“Being like what?”

“...unusual.”

Aphrodite’s laughter filled her ear. “Honey, I think you’re forgetting something. So let me remind you. I’m the goddess of passion…”

Her finger softly trailed a line from Jihye’s forehead, through the rise and fall of her nose, playfully tapping her lower lip, then to her chin…

“Of pleasure…”

It slowly travelled down to her neck, tracing her collarbones…

“Of desire…”

Her touch left a burning trail as it slipped through the valley between her s, way down through her abdomen…

“Of lust…”

The finger reached her navel, encircling in a tasteful precision. Jihye clenched her jaw and grabbed the intruding hand, entwining their fingers. 

“Of love.” Jihye supplied, voice scraping through her constricted throat and coming out raspier than she remembered it.

Love.

What exactly is love?

Jihye’s not sure. But she looks into Aphrodite’s eyes and she knows, right here, next to her, this is Love—in divine flesh and golden blood.

Aphrodite looked away. “I shouldn’t have taken off my girdle.” she said, chuckling. “Now you’re not getting affected by my charms.”

Jihye frowned. “But you don’t need the girdle. You’re already perfect.”

Aphrodite smiled, the shade of pink dusting her cheeks probably from the hot water and steam. “Aww, aren’t you cute.”

She snuggled close, hugging Jihye’s arm and mindlessly rubbing her toes against Jihye’s legs. She tried to ignore the touches and the sparks that it bring, the voluptuous body snug against hers. She tried to ignore the heat, the thick, violent fiery pressure tightening with want—

“Why are you so stiff? Loosen up. Hold me.”

Jihye didn’t budge, heat creeping up to her face. She had no idea what to do. Hold her? That sounds like a violation to her personal space, though the goddess surely was already violating hers and had given her permission. But still.

Aphrodite rolled her eyes and huffed in frustration. “How uptight. I’ll do it myself then.” she shifted wrapping her arms around Jihye and pulling her in.

Jihye relaxed. It’s not so bad. In fact, it’s actually quite nice and comfortable and soft. She rested her head against the goddess’s divine collarbones and encircled her arms around her heavenly waist. She smelled so good.

“So this is how it feels like to be the big spoon.” Aphrodite muttered.

“Hm? Did you say something?”

“No.”

Jihye closed her eyes and sighed in contentment. She started lazily drawing random patterns on Aphrodite’s stomach. She felt her muscles tense but she continued mindlessly writing, one hanja character at a time first before she started writing an entire sentence to a poem.

Your warm velvet skin, your lips where light lies, and your eyes that looks like they got soaked in the rain, everything is beautif—

Aphrodite suddenly hissed and grabbed her scrawling hand that have unknowingly ventured just below her bellybutton. Jihye looked up at her, blinking. “What’s wrong?”

The goddess’s expression was so intense she looked like she’s going to smite her, her eyes are dark and unreadable. Jihye swallowed. Did she do something wrong?

“This is not going well.”

“Huh?”

Aphrodite leaned close, their noses bumping, breaths mingling in the hairsbreadth of space. “This is supposed to be a punishment for you. I was supposed to arouse you and then leave you high and dry but…” she rested her forehead heavily against hers and sighed, “Why does it feel like I’m the one being punished?”

Jihye cupped her cheek. She didn’t understand but she didn’t want to see her look so anguished. “What is it? How can I help?”

“I want you, Seo Jihye.”

The goddess closed the gap and their lips met in a crashing explosion of passion.

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

Love.

It’s one of the things Jihye’s never sure about. She had read about it a lot, heard it being mentioned a lot, but she never understood the concept. The idea is foreign, unfathomable—to feel so much for someone, so much of happiness and sorrow and everything all at once. To be willing to risk it all, to hold a hand even if it means letting go of everything else. She just couldn’t imagine how that would be like, how that’s even possible.

So when it trampled into her life like the Colchis bull—hot, raging, and wild—she was completely caught off-guard.

“Dove?”

Jihye’s hands froze over the loom, watching the goddess on her bed stir awake.

A goddess on her bed.

Wow. What a concept.

Aphrodite squinted at her from beneath the sheets and Jihye held her breath. The sunlight hit her curled up figure, making her look more ethereal than she should. The drowsy look on her face, tousled hair, and her bare shoulder and collarbones peeking out from the blankets giving off the mixed impression of both adorable and sensual. Jihye felt herself flush, events of last night rushing back.

The goddess had been insatiable. It was a pretty wild night. A night she won’t be forgetting anytime soon.

“You’re awake?”

Aphrodite groaned. “What are you doing there? Come back here.” she whined.

“I’m, uh, in the middle of something.”

“Seo Jihye.”

“Yes, yes, I’m coming.”

She got pulled into the bed as soon as she’s within reach and Aphrodite immediately snuggled against her, legs tangled together. She could feel the goddess's smile against her neck.

“You smell so good.” she lazily whispered into her ear.

“Uh…thank you.”

Aphrodite chuckled. “After everything we did last night, how can you still be so shy?”

Jihye’s face burnt. She did not need to be reminded of last night again. Not that it was terrible. It was great, amazing, excellent, perfect—no words could encompass that immaculate experience. But the fact that she thought of it like that just makes her all the more embarrassed.

“You are beautiful, Seo Jihye.”

Her face felt even hotter, the warmth chugging from her chest and spreading all over her cheeks. It’s quite something to be called beautiful by the goddess of beauty herself, who found nobody else beautiful other than herself.

The goddess was peeking at her, multicolored eyes sparkling. “You’re jesting, aren’t you?” Jihye accused.

“You are really very pretty.” Aphrodite purred, “Those bronze mirrors do you no justice.”

“You are jesting.” Jihye decided.

“Oh, take the compliment, woman. It’s not every day I compliment a girl.” Aphrodite said, exasperated. ”Though I do admit your hair can do a little fixing…”

Jihye rolled her eyes.

Aphrodite giggled. “You know what else is pretty? This thing you have in here.” she tapped a finger to Jihye’s chest. Her eyes softened. “You have a good heart, Seo Jihye. Pure and innocent. Makes me want to tarnish you a little…”

“I thought you hated women.”

Aphrodite hummed, her hand slipping in Jihye’s tunic and tracing circles on her stomach. “What gave you that impression?”

“The stories…you always brought down terrible punishments to women.” Jihye paused. “You’re not going to turn me into stone, are you? Or make me fall in love with a bear?”

Aphrodite pinched her side, laughing. “Don’t be silly.”

“But that’s what you did in the stories.”

“Yes, I admit I usually do hate those kunops. How dare they scorn love and compare their beauty to me? Me! A whole goddess of beauty! The nerve!” Aphrodite had pulled away as she ranted to the ceiling. Jihye turned to her side, cheek propped on her knuckle as she observed the way her brows scrunched together, her nose wrinkling in disdain.

“But not you,” the goddess added as though as an afterthought, turning to meet her gaze. “You’re different. I like you.”

Jihye blushed. “I personally think you should have punished the actual people who claimed those women were more beautiful than you though. Those women did nothing wrong. Like Cenchreis, Psyche—”

Aphrodite’s glare stopped the words from coming out of . Literally. It was suddenly impossible to speak. Jihye thought she would finally be turned into a bug but the goddess just scoffed and rolled her eyes, “Whose side are you on?”

“On the side of fair and justice.” she answered, finally finding her voice again.

Aphrodite shot her another withering look, her eyes flashing pink. Jihye swallowed. Did she say something wrong?

“Then you should’ve slept with Nemesis instead. You shouldn’t have flirted with me with that odd foreign language of yours. You shouldn’t have looked at me that way.”

“Huh? I do not—”

Aphrodite pounced, knocking the breath out of her.  

Jihye gazed up at the goddess hovering over her, dark, tousled hair cascading on the sides of her face and tickling her cheeks. “W-What are you doing?”

“Showing you why you should always, and I mean always, be on love’s side.” Aphrodite growled.

Oh?

Oh.

Oh.

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

In the back of her mind, she always knew that all good things are bound to come to an end.

So when aji confronts her one morning after a passionate night with Aphrodite, she wasn’t really surprised.

“What has been happening?” the woman said, walking into her sleeping in. Her goddess is long gone, her side of the bed cold, her arms empty.

Jihye stirred, “Ngh. What is it, aji?” she mumbled, barely able to open her eyes.

“What.has.been.happening?”

The intensity of her voice shook off some of her stupor. Jihye groggily sat up, squinting at the woman. “What do you mean?”

“Sleeping had never been one of your habits, your highness.” aji said dryly. “Care to explain why it suddenly became so?”

Sobriety possessed her in an instant. She became hyperaware of her state of undress and lifted the sheets to cover herself in vain. “I… It’s… I forgot to wear my clothes after bathing last night.”

“Is that so? Then you must have been forgetting it for days now. You have become quite forgetful, princess.”

Jihye swallowed nervously. She wished Aphrodite was here. Okay, no, maybe having her absent is better. Her presence would just be too distracting. And she wasn’t sure the goddess would help clear this up. Nine times out of ten, she would make things worse. Maybe kiss her in front of aji just to get her point across. Heavens, that would be mortifying. Aji would faint.

She took a deep, bracing breath. “I am in love, aji.”

Aji didn’t look surprised. “Who is he? How does he pass through the palace guards?” she demanded, scowling and looking every bit disapproving.

“She.” Jihye mumbled, staring at the sheets. “Who is she.”

“I beg your pardon?”

“I am in love with a goddess, aji.”

“I beg your pardon – you’re in love with a what?!”

“A goddess.” Jihye repeated, firmer this time and meeting her gaze, “I’m in love with a goddess.”

Aji sat on the foot of her bed with a look of concern as she scanned her face. “Are you feeling okay? I think you’ve been reading too much of those Greek stories.”

Jihye huffed in frustration. Of course, she would find it hard to believe. “I am serious.” she bravely met her gaze, deciding to stand up for her feelings. She’s not about to deny it. Besides, the goddess would definitely smite her and turn her into a wild apricot if she does.

“You’re serious.” aji echoed in realization as she searched her eyes and found no humor nor lunacy in them. Jihye nodded, expecting the woman to go crazy and start lecturing her about the ways of being a proper lady and maybe exile her to another country.

Jihye went off before she could stop herself. “I know it is not right. I am aware of the ramifications. But I cannot help what I feel. I am completely powerless to fight against this abstract emotion that I can neither see nor touch nor stop from holding my heart hostage to unfathomable beauty and passion, this love that even the gods are frightened of.” she blurted defensively before aji could say anything, “It is not something I can control but even if I can, I have no intentions of stopping it because this, this feeling is the most wonderful thing I have ever experienced in my entire neglected, solitary life. I won’t stop feeling this way and no one can stop me.”

By the end of her tirade, her eyes have become misty she had to blink the tears away and hoarse but she feels lighter, letting it all out. And maybe even a little brave. She can almost hear Aphrodite’s amused chuckle, her sultry voice saying, that’s the spirit, my little dove.

Aji looked stunned for a moment before her expression turned sympathetic. “Okay. I understand.”

“Y-You do?”

The woman held her hand. “Yes. Now, tell me all about it.”

Jihye did, spilling her heart out. She told her how they first met (gaining a disapproving scowl at her admitting she’d been sneaking out at night), the times they spent together, and just everything wonderful about the moments spent with her goddess. At some point in her storytelling, a small smile have crept to her lips, one which she also has no power to stop.

By the end of her story, aji still gave her the same resigned, sympathetic look. “I want you to be happy but please. Be careful, princess.”

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

Good things come to an end.

Jihye had always known.

The pain of separation is inevitable, her shaky relationship with a deity isn’t permanent and letting go earlier on would ease the hurt of suffering.

Jihye had always known.

Yet she couldn’t stop herself. Time and time, she found it impossible to hold back. Time and time, she finds herself falling into the warm arms of love, sinking into the quicksand of affection and having no means to get back up.

She sinks deep into those arms, quite literally now, and the goddess chuckles.

“Why are you being clingy today?” she asked, dropping kisses along her bare shoulder and leaving a trail of goosebumps on her wake.

“Nothing.”

“Well, I’m not complaining.” Aphrodite plucks a grape from thin air, feeding her before picking another for herself.

Jihye closed her eyes, basking in the goddess’s presence. She liked this, resting her head on divine collarbones, soft warm chest pressed against her back rising and falling like a lullaby, doing nothing as they bathe in young sunshine, iridescence kissing flushed skin. Yet she couldn’t help but dread the inevitable separation. She’s read all about it in the stories, the romance between deities and mortals all boils down to a similar end; tragedy, heartbreak, lunacy. How can she guarantee theirs won’t be the same?

“Something’s bothering you.” Aphrodite noticed. She planted a soft kiss on the crown of her head. “What is it, little dove?”

“Nothing.”

“You seem to be very fond of saying that this morning.” she placed another kiss, coaxing. “You know you can talk to me about it.”

“It’s just…” Jihye chewed her lower lip contemplatively. “When you get tired and decide to leave me, promise me you won’t disappear without notice.”

Aphrodite stiffened. “What are you…? Are you implying I would – Seo Jihye, I would never—”

Jihye broke away from her hold and turned, looking up at those multicolored eyes. “Please. Just promise me.” she whispered. “When the time comes that you no longer love me, when the time comes that you would have to leave…promise that you would tell me.”

The goddess stared back with an unreadable expression. With her deific face set so still, she looked so much like those marble sculptures—distant and unreal.

And then she spoke, “I swear to the River Styx…”

Jihye waited for relief but it never came. She sighed and nodded. “Thank y—”

“…that I will never stop loving you.”

Thunder rumbled.

Jihye gasped, wide eyes swiveling back to Aphrodite’s now smiling ones. “Did you just—Are you out of your mind? An oath like that—”

“If you think my love is so fickle then you are wrong. I will never stop loving you.” the goddess interrupted, absently combing back Jihye’s hair with her fingers. “I can make you immortal. I can take you to my palace and we can be together without fearing death to pull us apart. We can stay like this forever, just you and me. I can get you a star from the heavens. I can make you your own constellation. Just name it and I will give it to you. We can—”

“—not do that.” Jihye finished, smiling sadly. She caressed her cheek; gingerly, lovingly. It was sweet of her but she knew her nature. “We cannot do that, my lady.”

Aphrodite clenched her jaw, angry pink flashing in her eyes. “Why not? If only you’d change your mindset, then we can—”

Jihye silenced her with a kiss. “We cannot.” she looked into her eyes, searching, imploring. “You know we can’t.”

Multicolored eyes narrowed. “Do you not love me?”

“Wha—Of course I do! I love you! But you must understand that—”

Aphrodite pulled away, rough and livid. She got to her feet. “You believe too little, Seo Jihye.” she started glowing brighter and brighter. Jihye averted her eyes and when the light subsided, the goddess was gone.

She sighed, the silence in the room deafening and the remnants of divine fragrance suffocating.

“And you believe too much.”

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

Aphrodite didn’t visit for the next three days.

Jihye already saw it coming but it still upset her. The goddess came into her life and managed to turn it upside down in such a short period of time. The isolation she’s accustomed to have suddenly become difficult to bear.

But she figured Aphrodite would need the space to realize the weight of her promise and what the ramifications of them living together forever would be. Even a goddess needs her time to think, Jihye understood. After all, she had been used to getting anything she wants. It must’ve been quite baffling for her to have this mere mortal try to knock some sense into her. Fortunately for Jihye, she wasn’t turned into something hideous or cursed to stink forever.

Jihye is not a fool with her head above the clouds. She knows how severe reality can be; knows her father will never want her back, knows the Persians are only nice to her because they’re obligated to, and knows that Aphrodite, no matter how wonderful she is, can set her aside any minute like she did to countless lovers many times before.

But Aphrodite, that sweet goddess, believes in love a little too much. Then again, she should’ve known. It’s part of the job description. So when she threw a tantrum and left, Jihye wasn’t really surprised. She had dared to question the goddess of love’s love for her, after all. She won’t even be shocked if Aphrodite decides to start hating her.

“Your highness?” Aji’s voice startled her out of her thoughts. “You haven’t touched your food. Please leave the loom for a while and eat.”

“No, it’s okay. You can take it away.” Jihye put the rose Aphrodite had given her during their third meeting back on the table. It must’ve been magical because it didn’t seem to wilt.

Aji clicked her tongue disapprovingly. “You must eat, your highness.

“I don’t feel like eating.”

“The cattle didn’t feel like being slaughtered either but did that matter? I’ll have the servants heat this up and you will eat. I’ll stuff it down your throat if I have to.”

Jihye stared at her. “Can you do that to your princess?”

Aji stared back. “I can. It’s not like your father minds.”

Jihye cracked her first smile and helplessly watched as aji ordered the servants around. When they left, she turned to Jihye, brows drawn together in worry. “This is about her, isn’t it?”

She knew what she meant. “What do you mean?”

“Your goddess. This is about her, is it not?”

“How did you know?”

“Well, you have been waking up properly clothed nowadays and while I appreciate that, I do not think you do.” Aji said. “What’s wrong? Did you have a fight?”

Jihye shook her head, too tired to talk about it. “Yes…it’s complicated.”

“Yes, well, I suppose it is. I would never understand how a relationship between women works. Much less with the other half being an all-powerful immortal.” Aji makes a face. After a short pause, she speaks again. “This may not be the ideal time but I have something for you.”

Jihye looked at her, sensing the shift of mood. “What is it?”

Aji wrung her hands a few times before finally taking out a roll of parchment. She hands it to Jihye with a dark expression. “Under different circumstances, this would’ve been quite the good news. But now, I don’t think you would appreciate it…”

It’s a missive. With the royal seal. Not of Persia but of Silla. Jihye’s pulse quickened. Excitement? Delight? Dread? Fear? She had no idea.

She looked at the seal. She recognized it but it felt foreign. It’s hers but it’s not. She didn’t know what to feel, what to think. What would her father want to say to her after all this time?

“Have you read it?” she asked.

Aji shook her head. “But I can guess what it contains.”

Jihye clenched her jaw and unfurled the parchment. She took in the handwriting and was stumped when she saw it wasn’t the writing she had obsessively memorized in her childhood. She finally read the message and read it again just to make sure.

“No.” she whispered.

She read it again, fooling herself that it would be different this time. But it remains the same.

She’s being summoned back to Silla. Her exile is lifted. And she is to marry a prince from T’ang. Tomorrow, at first light, she will be delivered back to her kingdom. All these, as decreed by her father, the king, with his stamp fixed on the end of the letter, blazing red.

Her vision blurred and droplets soaked the parchment. Her thoughts flew back to multicolored eyes, slanted smiles, and the scent of cinnamon and balsam.

“Princess…”

She clenched her fists, crumpling the paper. “Can you please give me a moment?”

Aji looked like she wanted to protest but she didn’t. She pursed her lips and stood. “As you wish. Summon me if you need any assistance.” she bowed and left.

Tears flowed down steady and silent, cries held back and muffled behind a trembling hand.  She stumbled to the window and gazed up at the dusk sky, eyes locking on that bright twinkling star—Venus.

She parted her lips, meaning to call out, but a strangled sob escaped instead and she broke down.

Why is it that every time she tries to live her life, it gets taken away from her right before her own eyes like the universe is bent on doing everything in its power to make her miserable? Is this the price she has to pay for causing her mother’s death? The payment for the sin of being born into this world?

“I told you kings are full of skatá.”

Jihye’s sobs were cut short with a hiccup as she turned to the sudden speaker. There she is, seated on her bed, casually munching on an apple. Their eyes met and her heart picked itself up from the floor and started doing its silly dance again. Aphrodite gave her a smile, discarding the apple that vanished into thin air the moment it left her hand.

Her breath was taken away, tears frozen unshed and glistening. “You came back.”

The goddess’s smile turned somber. “I did. But I guess I’m a little too late.”

She watched her make her way to where she’s standing. “Y-You don’t hate me?”

Aphrodite kept smiling down at her. “I’d be damned if I do. Oh, hush, dove. Quit crying. You’re making me tear up too.”

Jihye tried to swallow down her sob but the tears kept flowing out. “I’m sorry.” she said as she rubbed her eyes.

Aphrodite pried her hands away from her face and kissed the tears away. “Don’t cry. It breaks my heart.”

“B-But I’m leaving…”

“And I refuse to be the one left behind.”

“…what do you mean?”

Aphrodite kissed her fingers, “Can I fancy you to a ride to the sunset forever with me now?” she took one look at her face and laughed. “You look like a kicked puppy when you frown like that.”

“You know where I stand in that matter. You have to understand that—”

“I understand.” Aphrodite softly said, bringing their hands down but not letting go. “I was…too upset that night to see your point but now I do and I don’t like to admit it but you’re not wrong. But still. I can change. For you I can. I know I can.”

This goddess, really…Ah, but what can she do? Things aren’t that simple. Change isn’t something that comes easy for humans. With gods…well…

Jihye smiled. “I love you. Just as you are.”

Aphrodite looked crestfallen. “But…”

Jihye leaned forward, resting her forehead on Aphrodite’s shoulder. “Can we not argue on our last night?”

“This night does not have to be the last.”

Jihye sighed. “This feeling, this love, I want to preserve this. I want to remember it like this; beautiful and precious. Accepting your offer would ruin what we have. Maybe not now, but eventually it will. Spending a lifetime with a person would be suffocating. Spending more than one? It’s bound to make us crack. I don’t want that to happen.”

Aphrodite didn’t reply. They stood there in silence, basking in each other’s presence as reality slowly sinks in. Jihye stayed against the goddess’s shoulder, afraid that if she sees her face, her resolve will be broken by her greed.

“Then I should make this last night worth it.” Aphrodite broke the silence. “I’ll give you anything you want. Should I turn your father into a gnat? He’ll make a wonderful gnat. And that prince fellow would look fantastic as a frog.”

Jihye laughed, relieved that she’s taking this well. She straightened up. “Don’t be silly.”

“Whatever you want,” Aphrodite whispered, “Do you want me to get you a star? An entire constellation? Tell me whatever you want and you shall have it.”

Loving a goddess surely has its perks. Jihye wrapped her arms around her neck. “You.” she said. “I want you.”

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

Jihye gazed at the landscape, taking in everything as far as her eyes can go. Persia is a beautiful kingdom, she realized, with its intricate columns and majestic domes. It’s a pity she had only appreciated it when she’s leaving it.

The Persian Empire is all she knew. Travelling made her feel both giddy and anxious. Behind her, aji is supervising the servants loading their things in the ship her father sent to fetch her. Sure she wanted to see more of the world but if only she can stay…if only she met her a little earlier…if only they get to spend more time…

She sighed. What’s the point of seeing more of the world when her world had always been her?

No, it’s not the right time to get emotional right now. But the collective thought of leaving her goddess, meeting her father, and returning to her kingdom that’s more foreign than this place weighed her down. She wanted to burst into tears.

“Your highness?” a servant came up to her. “The ship is ready to sail as soon as you are.”

She gave her a smile. “Okay. Thank you.”

Taking a deep breath, she took one last look at the place she considered her home before turning back.

“Seo Jihye?”

A deep, masculine voice made her stop in her tracks. She turned and saw the most beautiful man she had ever laid eyes on; a lean, muscular young man with straight black hair and irises as red as blood and a face that’s handsome yet harsh. A bow and quiver were slung over his broad shoulders but that wasn’t the odd part. It’s the majestic white wings on his back that stole Jihye’s attention.

“Eros.” she breathed out, still awed by the revelation. She looked around but nobody else seemed to see him. That’s impossible. He’s literally glowing.

The god of love looked at her from head to toe, “So you’re who’s been making my mother lose her head, huh? I can see why. You must be something else completely for her to consider you that special.”

Jihye felt her face grow warm. “Where is she? Is she alright?”

“No. She’s hiding in her palace, cradling her broken heart.  She’s not receiving any visitors, not even Ares. If word gets around about the state she’s in, it would bruise her pride. We wouldn’t want that. The last time she got offended, she drove mares to a frenzy they tore a king into pieces.”

“She throws awful tantrums.” she agreed.

“Anyway, she sent me here to give you this.” Eros handed her a basket she didn’t notice him carrying.

She stared at the clump covered with a white cloth. It’s heavy. “What is this?”

“There’s a note inside. It should help.”

In the docks, aji started to call for her. Their time is running out.

“You should go.” Eros said.

Jihye nodded. “Please…” she blurted, “Please tell her…that I wish for her happiness.” she chewed on her lower lip. “There are a lot of things I want to say that words cannot contain. But I can tell you this: please take care of her.”

He surprised her by breaking into an amused smile. “She’s right. You have a good heart.” he said. “Be well, Seo Jihye. I hope the time will come for you to have peace. Let her go. It’s for the best.”   

“Your highness!”

She turned to see aji gesturing for her to hurry up. Jihye nodded, signaling for her to wait, but when she turned, Eros was gone.

She stared at the wicker basket, woven out of gleaming bronze, and pulled back the cloth.

A pair of familiar multicolored eyes stared back at her, wide and innocent. Jihye almost dropped it.

A…A baby?

She didn’t know what to do. She’s never dealt with babies before. It’s the first time she saw one so close. She awkwardly looked at it, taking in the light tuft of hair on its head and its fluffy rosy cheeks. It’s…beautiful.

A roll of parchment was tucked in the baby’s meaty arm. Jihye plucked it off. It read:

 

 

A token of our romance, the fruit of what we had.

A pity it is not a wild apricot, is it not?

 

珠泫

 

珠 which means pearls or jewels, for our love is the most precious thing that happened to me,

泫 which means to weep, for the sheer pain our separation brings,

And so she shall be called 珠泫, which means teardrops as precious as jewels, for your tears are precious.

So please, don’t cry. Either because of this good-bye or because of your father who’s full of skatá, or because of any other reasons. If you do, I’m afraid I won’t be there to kiss your tears away. 

But she will be there for you and I hope you won’t be as lonely with her by your side.

And yes, I did learn something from your hanja lessons. Now you can’t accuse me of just using it as an excuse to flirt with you. 

I love you.

I love you.

I love you.

Farewell, my little dove.

 

 

Tears welled up but she blinked them away, chuckling at the last part.

She looked at the baby, who had Aphrodite’s color-shifting eyes and Jihye’s milky skin. But the little one glowed with power, oozing with beauty even in such a young age. She’s a special child, no doubt about that.

Jihye smiled, “Hello, Joohyun.”

Joohyun blinked cluelessly up at her, making her giggle.

“Your highness,” Aji suddenly popped out from behind, startling her so much she threw the cloth back on to the basket. “We should go now.”

“Ah. Yes.”

She followed the woman to the ship. Looking up at the dim skies of dawn, she saw the morning star.

Smiling, she whispered to the air, knowing that her words would find her.

“I love you too.”