“ I wasn’t able to go.”

It was the last Twicelights for 2019 where they could’ve performed completely. Time is precious. The girls would dearly miss Mina once again as she couldn’t join the massive year-end events happening next.

Chaeyoung turns to Mina and places hand on the other’s thigh, “You didn’t overwork though, did you? I’m sorry, Minari.”

Other than her long-time knee injury, Mina sprained her foot from catching up to the recent choreographies before the Nagoya shows.

She waves her hand no, “Walking doesn’t take work and I sat thru choreos. Thankfully, Nayeon-ie and Jeongyeon-ie played with me on our unit stage. It didn’t feel daunting.”

“We’re really like family now”, Chaeng says.

“At times, even more.” Mina agrees. She recalled Chaeng’s GQ interview and realized how much wisdom this maknae has. “As you’ve said, it would have been difficult going through it alone. Honestly, if not for everyone I would’ve…”

Chaeng hushes her, “Don’t say~ It wasn’t the case. You’re not alone and will never be! I, for one, won’t leave you.”

Mina leans onto the maknae’s shoulder, “Thank you for being patient with me. This time, it’s Jihyo who’s facing her anxieties. You’ve also said, there’s 9 of us who understand each other more than anyone. Right?””

“Gurae. You found strength. Jihyo unnie would too”, Chaeng pats Mina. “She has us. And particularly…”

Mina nods with an empathic smile completing Chaeng’s thought, “…There’s someone waiting for her—Sana, whom Jihyo can depend her worries with.”

Twice, this time, didn’t fly back to Korea. A sound decision as The Mnet Asian Music Awards, which will also be held in Nagoya, is in 2 days anyway. Enough breathing room to recover, prepare, and meditate if they must, instead of wasting energy going back and forth.

While rehearsing at the dome, Jihyo wobbles at the sight of the seating capacity. There will be 50,000 people here who would look at me believing the news that I’m some desperate girl crazy to meet up and drive to him.

Her breathing becomes erratic. No matter how I send messages, no one understands. No one notices the truth. And if I tell more in details, it would be me against them. Ottoke? What do I do?

Sana catches her from behind. The dark-haired Japanese squeezes and caresses the leader’s arms. She mouths to the other’s ear, “Jihyo-yah. My Jihyo, WE are here with you. This moment right here is precious that nothing else matters.”

With eyes closed focusing on her partner’s calming words, Jihyo nods. Then, she reaches to the other’s hand, takes them off, and proceeds to her blocking spot.

Jeongyeon sees this off vibe between the two so, she offers help. “So~ Do we invade her room again?”

“Aniya”, Sana tells Jeong. She doesn’t sulk at her partner as she expects that this is what it takes to wait for Jihyo.

Back in the hotel, Jihyo heads straight to her room. Sana who’s behind following the leader sees the door shutting at her face again. She pauses and thinks for a bit before sending a text.

[lets watch Camellia Blooms?]

But Sana suddenly finds it tacky. So, she erased it and types another.

[please don’t catch cold. good night <3]

Sana breathes out, relieved as she has done what she could for the day. And this time it seems, it’s paying off. Just as she’s about to walk away, the door clicks open. Sana turns around wide-eyed.

Jihyo clears throat before telling her, “Hug me then.”

The anxious leader is cuddled to sleep. She badly needs Sana, her saving grace, to rest and be able to face thousands tomorrow. Before drifting to dreams, Jihyo mumbles. Her birthday message for Sana last year, “My partner~ Thank you for always being with me.”

Jihyo has such precious people with her. Yet, there are moments that gets the best of herself when consumed by opinions. The thing is, she’s not the only name written on the news.

They woke up to the leader’s phone ringing. Jihyo grunts upon seeing a call from manager, she wouldn’t answer that she rather bury her face to Sana’s neck. Since the issue, it’s become nerve-wracking to pick up manager’s calls first thing in the day.

Seconds later, Sana’s phone rings. Still the manager. The Japanese picks up instantly, thinking she’d be asked to lead on promos as usual when in Japan. But it wasn’t the case as she’s told, “Sana ssi, please put her on the line.”

“Huh? Okay~” Sana turns to loud speaker and prods her partner. Jihyo turns away to the other side. Sana spoons her getting the phone close. The latter doesn’t have much choice but to speak.

“Yeoboseyo?”

“Jihyo ssi, just to let you know… Kang Daniel halts promotions.”

To their shock, both Sana and Jihyo sit up abruptly. The manager adds, “Konnect has stated they’ll turn their focus on treatment as he suffers from Depression and Panic Disorder that have gotten severe recently.”

Kang Daniel. The other name written on the news. Just like what Chaeyoung had pertained to, it must’ve been extremely difficult to find strength alone such as the case in a one-man band.

Having a girlfriend would lend strength. There’s someone to whom you can depend your worries with; someone who’d understand who you are, what you do, and what you go through.

But what good is it for if it’s only on paper? It’s horrible and it shows.

---

“Tell me again, what good will this do?” Daniel holding onto a non-disclosure agreement turned to his advisor.

Clears throat, “You’d finally claim independence from LM.”

Daniel had been on court hearings versus his former agency. It seemed endless. Signing these papers would definitely turn the tides to his favor. If only it wouldn’t risk his fanbase. A looming effect of being involved in dating news.

Thus, he expressed reservations “I’m literally building from the ground up. What CEO would risk this? I’m sorry, I’m not your guy.”

But what other choice was there? In front of him was an agent waiting for his signature. The ominous man reiterated Daniel’s situation.

He said, “You’re the perfect guy for this. We didn’t come here not knowing what you needed the most. LM is under CJ.” He sniggers, “It’s foolish to think you can do it alone.”

CJ is a generational chaebol. It’s one of the biggest, most influential conglomerate groups that founded the capitalist Korea today.

Felt helpless, Daniel gulped at the magnitude of things. But if the ones who sent this guy could go up against CJ, what monster is he dealing with? He sizes things up asking “And if I don’t sign, what then?”

“The government will cease and take your assets”, said with a flat smile. He then added, “But you’re a good boy, right? You won’t let that happen. Besides, no need to worry. The girlfriend we’ll give you fits your style.”

The young CEO gritted his teeth mustering courage to offer some counterproposal. “I- don’t have much choice, do I? But you need ME on this. At the least, satisfy one condition—the timing, not on my debut.”

The man nodded triumphantly, “Of course. We’ll still have to come up with the photo evidences anyway.”

August 5 then came the news. The advisor got his hands on his temple aching of how the photos turned out, “Who the heck would believe these? Mere photos of cars. Not together in one frame. And this wide shot, a blurred side profile of a supposed Twice Jihyo? IT’S WHACK! We’re doo-”

CEO slammed the table.

“I’m doomed”, Daniel said as he was reading the words. He further expressed disappointment, “What did they make me out to be? No one should believe it!”

What Dispatch wrote that triggered him the most was, “The two relied on each other for support during their recent hard times.”

It was an outright disrespect to both his and the fans’ hard work. Daniel then took it to his fan café and make that truth known.

“Hello. This is Kang Daniel.

First of all, I’m really sorry to everyone who may have been very surprised when they saw the sudden news this morning.

You may not have been able to focus on anything and I’m worried that I’m writing to you too late. I’m sorry I couldn’t say it beforehand and talk here in a space that could overflow with words between all of you and me.

Truly a lot happened before I could stand on my own. Some were really tiring times. But what helped me then was my fans rather than anything else…”

Or more suitably, ‘rather than ANYONE else’. Daniel was keen to give credit to where it’s due. Clearly, that credit shouldn’t belong to Jihyo.

He concluded his letter to fans, “In order to carry out the role of taking care of the fans’ hearts, I will become singer Kang Daniel who always shows you a good image. I’ve always considered that the most important thing.

I’ve received so much from fans and I feel grateful. I’ll try to return more than that in the future. Tomorrow, I’ll become Kang Daniel who is better than today.

I really, really thank you for being together with me.”

Surely, thousands had remained supporting him. Publicly, that is. At the end of the day, whenever Daniel goes back home, he wrestles with the noise of judgements ALONE.

And just like a balloon taking in all the pressure for the past months, the young CEO has reached his limit and popped off on fan café with alarming messages:

Seriously, I’m really

Daniel || 2019-12-03 || 23:43

[It’s too much. I’m so tired. How can it be this hard? It’s been so difficult. Someone please save me]

Everything

Daniel || 2019-12-03 || 23:52

[The photos of myself kneeling after the end of Wanna One’s concert and the emotions I was feeling at the time has become a weapon to make fun of me.

How they edit everything that I do to make it look bad. How the music and performances that I love are being treated like trash. How the fans that I treasured are being ridiculed. How my family is getting cursed out instead of me. How it’s suddenly become a crime to say that they like me.

Just everything is really too difficult. The fact that I am me is too difficult.]

Really

Daniel || 2019-12-03 || 23:58

[Ever since I was a part of a group, I endured every unjust situation and all kinds of rumors. Even this year, and even just last week, I have been enduring it all and keeping to myself.

But I’m really just so tired. I’m really having a difficult time.]

Really I am

Daniel || 2019-12-04 || 00:02

[It’s come to a point where I’m afraid of the sun rising again tomorrow. I’m just afraid of any news report that has my name.]

I Know Everything

Daniel || 2019-12-04 || 00:11

[I know how everyone is cursing me out every single day. I know what words they’re using and the malicious comments they’re using to curse me out. I know how they’re judging my life by the couple of phrases and the false rumors. I know how I’ve lived my life. I have really just endured it all so much. Truly.

I’m too tired now.]

---

A deafening silence ensues. Sana doesn’t know what to say to calm the negative thoughts that may be consuming Jihyo right now.

After all, the world that made the names JIHYO and DANIEL inseparable- will have something to talk about again.

Sana pulls Jihyo into an embrace.