All day Nayeon was getting into fights with Sana.  An eyeroll over Sana's unwashed bowl in the sink, a scoff at Sana's loud laugh at a joke, a muted sigh of frustration when Sana tripped over her own foot into Nayeon's freshly folded pile of clothes.  She had never gotten in a fight with any of her members before but today seemed like it was going to be the day she finally snapped.  She was storming into the bathroom, already irritated by Sana's weird habit of slapping lotion onto her body, when Sana turned around to face her brightly.

"I'm almost done!  You can have the whole room to yourself in a second."  She pats herself down for a few more seconds then lets down her hair out of its ponytail and walks out.  If she was aware of Nayeon's mood she wasn't showing it at all.  Nayeon sighed and went about her nighttime routine.  No matter how annoyed she felt, Sana hadn't given her a reason to really be angry.  Maybe they could talk it out later.  She mulled this over while brushing her teeth.

Once she was back in their shared room, she thought of how to approach the subject, but Sana was playing audience to Mina, who was apparently breaking new records in a phone game she always played.  Jihyo was right next to her, and the pair of them were fervently cheering Mina on.  Nayeon didn't want to disrupt the fun.  She huffed, and threw herself down on her bed.  Nobody turned around.

Almost an hour later and Mina finally decided to shut off the game.  She and Jihyo whispered to each other from their beds, which were perpindicular to each other at the head.  Jihyo was talking about how Mina has an addiction, and Mina was trying to string together the most articulate defense she could form with her still developing Korean vocabulary.  Nayeon would have found this entertaining if she wasn't already so ticked off.  She hadn't heard another word from Sana since earlier.  Without turning around her best guess was that Sana was reading something, because she swore she heard a page flip or two, but she couldn't quite verify the sound.

Although her members were hyper at best, annoying at worst, she was still finding herself getting lulled to sleep by the white noise of conversation.  It occurred to her vaguely that the light was still on, but her body felt too heavy and tired to get up.  A few minutes later no one was talking anymore, and everyone was either falling asleep or already passed out.  She swore to herself she'd get up and turn off the light.  Just another minute of laying down and...

Nayeon heaved her body up to face the other direction, and melted back into her pillow.  She could barely keep her eyes open, and wouldn't have tried to at all if she hadn't felt the sudden shift in atmosphere.  Peeking through a haze of eyelashes, she noticed the room considerably darker, and a shadow moving around Sana's bed.  She tried to call out, but found her voice was trapped in a whisper.  The last thing she remembered was the sound of their fan turning on, and the sounds of Jihyo's quiet snores sending her off to sleep.

In the morning, she was the last to get up.  Normally Nayeon was an early riser, but it was a weekend, and she felt mentally exhausted.  By the time she rolled out of bed, most were done with breakfast, and light filled the living room.

"By the way," she said, plopping down on the couch next to Jihyo, "who turned off the light last night?"

"I did!"  Nayeon turned to look at Sana, who was in the kitchen washing dishes.  

"Why'd you do that?"

Sana shrugged.  Nothing good was on TV, so Nayeon got up and went over to the kitchen.  At first she busied herself with finding something to eat, but knowing fully there wasn't anything she was looking for in the first place, she finally sat down in a chair with a glass of water, and watched Sana work.

"I was gonna turn it off myself."

Sana shrugged again.  "One time I was up really late working on a project in middle school.  I was talking to my friends online while working, but it was so late they had all gotten off.  I was laying down in bed with my laptop on my stomach, and it was so hot it was putting me to sleep.  I was going to get up and brush my teeth but I thought I would just sleep for a second and get up later.  I remember my dad coming in, probably at like 2 or something I can't remember the time, and he turned off the light, and plugged my laptop back in the charger.  He didn't even make me get up to wash my face or anything he just turned off the light and closed the door.  I remember that felt so nice.  It reminded me of being a little kid.  Even though you can take care of things yourself, it feels good to be taken care of."

Nayeon remembered something similar with her mother tucking her in at 4am after training.  She bit down on the rim of her glass.  "I know what you mean.  Its sweet that you guys are so close."

Sana laughed, her shoulders jumping with the force of it.  "He still treats me like a baby.  But we were especially close when I was little.  He taught me everything.  How to floss, how to write my numbers, how to apply lotion."

Nayeon quirked an eyebrow.  So that's where that silly habit came from.  Imagining a tiny Sana trying to slap lotion on her face like an old man was kind of funny.  Feeling uplifted, Nayeon stood up, and took the last dish from Sana's hand.  "I got it."

"No let me-"

"-its fine.  I think I'll use this plate anyways.  I have to eat something."

"There's some rice in the fridge."

Nayeon smiled and nodded at Sana, dismissing her.  It was still hard getting used to all these new people in her life, but overall, not as bad as she thought.

 

----

 

Nayeon watched Sana approach Momo with a cone of double-chocolate fudge, and felt her stomach twist.  

"Momoring!  I got your favorite- oh."

She spotted the cone in Momo's hand -double-chocolate fudge- and stared down at the cone in hers.  Thankfully, Chaeyoung appeared out of nowhere saying "can I try that one?"

Sana redirected her blinding smile at Chaeyoung "-of course-" and let her have the ice cream.  All of this happened a good four feet from Momo, but she was too absorbed in eating to notice.  Finally after Sana left, Momo turned to Nayeon, nearly done, and chocolate around her lips, and said, "thank you!  I really love double chocolate."

"No problem."  Nayeon felt a glow of pride over taking care of Momo, and it temporarily overrided the guilt she felt earlier.  In a way, she knew she was treading someone else's territory.  Without placing a word on it, what Sana felt had to be similar to how Nayeon felt last week when Jeongyeon laughed harder at a joke Sana made, than the one Nayeon had said a few seconds earlier.  She shoved a hand in her pocket, retrieving the extra napkins she got, and went to clean Momo's lips.  Momo stood there, receiving her affection like an eager puppy.

"All better?"

Nayeon smiled at her.

"Much."

 

----

 

It was late, and she was in a foreign country, and all Nayeon wanted to do was sleep.  Sure, she was appreciative of the fact Sana put away all their shoes without asking, but then Sana turned around and was having a loud conversation with Tzuyu in the middle of the night.  They were whispering, but they were sharing a bed, and Nayeon could hear everything.

She tried to suffocate herself in her pillow, but it wasn't working.

Eventually she gave in to her natural curiosity, and started eavesdropping.

"Its kind of weird I don't know how to... hmm... talk... of it.  I don't know how... to be."

Nayeon tried to piece together Tzuyu's broken Korean but Sana replied faster than Nayeon's brain could think.

"Between two cultures, I know.  But you're doing fine.  I think they like that you're trying.  If you show that you'll be fine."

"Its not easy," Tzuyu said, with so much conviction the delivery sounded completely fluent.

Sana "mm-hmm'd" and they went on, trading stories, and discussion pronunciation.  Everytime Tzuyu got stuck on a word, Sana would think of some silly nonsensical trick on how to remember the definition or pronunciation.  

Nayeon picked at the sheets.  Tzuyu was someone else she found adorable, but sometimes hard to relate to.  She thought about all the times she held out a hand to Chaeyoung or Dahyun when they struggled with something new, and how she never thought to ask Tzuyu if she was having trouble with anything.  Schoolwork, or cooking, or even tying her shoes.  (Nayeon has laced up many knee-high boots; its an art.)

Part of her wanted to roll over right then, and insert herself, and prove how good she could take care of Tzuyu, maybe even better, but that was wrong.   She knew if she really cared, she would help when she was needed.  She felt her shoulders drop in exhaustion.  It was Nayeon's promise to herself to always help when she was needed.

 

----

 

It was late.  As usual, all Nayeon wanted was to sleep, but she sat awake at the edge of her bed, waiting.  Sana trudged into their room shortly after, and threw herself down on the bed.  She had changed her clothes, and her make up was off, thanks to Jihyo who helped her remove most of it in the car.  She didn't bother getting under the covers, which was odd since she always got cold at night.

Nayeon sighed, feeling her heart grow heavier at the sight of her.  Jihyo and Mina were still doing their nightly routine, but Nayeon figured they could use their phone lights to navigate in the dark.  It was more important Sana got her sleep.  She turned off the light, then felt her way over to Sana's bed, and began pulling the covers over her.

"I still need to brush my teeth," Sana mumbled, but Nayeon shushed her.

"Its okay."

"You don't have to-"

"-its okay," Nayeon repeated firmly.  "Go to sleep, you're tired."

She made sure the blankets were pulled up all the way over Sana's shoulders before returning to her own bed.  As she suspected, Jihyo and Mina returned making little to no noise, and didn't ask about why their light was already turned off.

After she was sure Sana was asleep, Nayeon finally laid down in her bed.

She watched Sana's silhouette for a long time before finally drifting off.

In the morning she was first up, and when Sana finally made her way out, Nayeon linked their arms together and offered up a red bean bun to share.

"Why are you giving me this?"

Nayeon shrugged.

"It feels good to be taken care of sometimes.  Even though you can take care of yourself."

Sana sighed, and Nayeon felt the weight of it on her own shoulders.  She stood upright, trying to prop Sana up against her body.  

"Thank you."

"Thank you," she replied, and caught Sana's first smile of the day.  It was worth it all the trouble, and the years of learning how to get along.  Nayeon felt Sana's fingers wrap tightly around her arm, and knew that something had irreversibly shifted.  Taking care of her members was Nayeon's job, and she would always help when she was needed, no matter what.