I CAN'T DO THIS. I've decided to just throw myself into the mess, even I'm surely not ready—I'll never be ready whenever.

I'm sitting on the beach sand with everyone from my class. I feel like I'm the only one in "mourning" mode here because no girl is in black clothes around me.

So we're divided into two sections; girls and boys, to probably help the PIC picking the players.

"Test, 1, 2, 3."

"Guys, you made it here on time!! Applause for yourself!"

Everyone starts clapping.

I'm clapping too, but lightly, while sitting with both palms resting on the ground behind my back.

I feel so restless that I don't have the mood to sit straight.

Some used to say that I look like I only have 10% of spirit to live every day. I think this time, it's like it's been decreased to -10%.

"Ok, the first sport we'll play is Volleyball! We have 5 rounds today in total and every round will be played by 6 different players. So most of you will have a chance to play today."

Everyone cheers.

Yay, in a flat tone from me.

"The losing team will have to drop themselves into the sea with minimal clothes! Imagine how freezing it is in this already-freezing air."

ttt.

Although I actually know how to play that sport a little bit.

"They only have to use the edge part of the sea for 30 seconds. We don't want anyone to get hurt here. If you have any question, please say it now."

Can I not play at all?

---

"Ok, let's start! Team A consists of those sitting in front of me: Daniel, Zhang Yuxi and Sun Qian!"

Everyone cheers every time a name is being called.

"Meanwhile Team B consists of those sitting on the very back: Feng Junjie, Guan Xiao Tong and Sun Yihan!"

Once the PIC calls my name, not everyone makes any sound but only some. They don't cheer but scream "Woooo!!!" instead, which in my interpretation sounds like booing me but in a positive way.

I roll my eyes as I stand up from where I was sitting and pat my to brush the sand off of it.

I start hearing some bickerings around. They're all from the girls.

"She actually dared to call her out."

"Seeing her up close like this, she looks scarier than in class."

"Glad, I wasn't picked."

"How am I supposed to act if I was chosen to be her teammate?"

"The unluckiest ones are those in her team."

I clench my teeth, squint and turn to scan those behind me; the source of all the non-sensical bickerings.

Some actually gulp when I look at them straight in their eyes.

I snicker at the tiny bit of satisfaction, then run to the field.

---

"Hi, I'm Yihan." I blurt that to my teammates while I try hard to show a smile—which ends up looking like a sarcastic one, instead.

They take a glance at each other first before telling me:

"I'm Junjie." Says the guy.

"Xiao Tong." Says the girl, while looking at... I don't know. Seems like the girls here mostly never like me even by a bit.

"Alright, so do you two know how to play this?" I ask them.

"I guess. You?" Junjie asks me.

"I do. But I'm a little nervous. I never play on a beach before."

"Alright, we're cool then." That's Junjie again. I think he's the only one that's willing to acknowledge me as his teammate here.

The PIC suddenly announces this on her mic, "So Team A plays on the left side, while Team B on the right side."

I choose to stand on the most right side; the nearest to the sea. Because according to my logic, I'll have the less chance of having to see the sea there.

---

"Alright, the first serve will be done by Team A."

Someone from that team hits the ball to our side of the field. But Junjie in our front hits it back to the enemy's side.

They keep repeating that until it's about to hit the area where I'm standing and I smash it dead on their field.

"Score for Team B!"

Junjie high-fives me while smiling.

I don't do the same thing to Xiao Tong because she still doesn't want to look at me, at all.

---

"Time for Team B to serve. Sun Yihan is going to hit the ball... where do you guys think she's planning to aim it to?"

I don't plan for this kind of thing, sis.

I randomly hit the ball to the enemy's field and they hit it back to us. It's heading to Xiao Tong's area so I yell, "Xiao Tong!"

But she suddenly takes a step to the side on purpose—because she looks flat like she's aware with what's going on. Thus the ball hits our field.

"Seems like Guan Xiao Tong was startled with the ball. Cheer for this team!"

"Score for Team A!"

I let out a sigh.

"Did you do that on purpose?" I blurt.

"No... that's not true, right?" Junjie chuckles uneasily like he's trying to save the atmosphere. "It's ok Xiao Tong, we can do this."

This is why I interact with the guys, mostly.

"Time for Team B to serve. Guan Xiao Tong is getting ready, guys... and, BAAM!"

She's able to hit the ball just fine. I know it. She knows how to play this.

But as the ball is hit back to her area, she rolls her eyes while letting out a slight smirk. I notice that.

I hurry to that side, to get myself ready for the ball, but when it's flying to me, my eyes glance at the sea in reflex.

My heart starts beating irregularly and I feel like everything starts slowing down... that I miss the ball.

"Score for Team A!"

I immediately shake my head out of it.

"What happened to Team B? Hope they'll get it together soon. Because Team A is leading this time."

"Let's wish both teams luck!"

I press my eyes, mentally cursing myself.

But suddenly I open them as I hear the girl snickers. "Saying that I did it on purpose when you did the same thing." The left corner of rises.

"Then ing play properly." I glare at her.

"Ok ok, girls. Focus on the game. We have some scores to beat here." Junjie blurts.