30 December 2015, Day.

“What the—“ Taehyung had just arrived when he’s welcomed by a bunch of chocolate, flowers, and plushies right on top of his desk. 

“Jungkook, who did this?” he asked in an annoyed tone.

“There are about six to seven girls who put all of these before you come, bro. You can’t help it, it’s your birthday anyway and you have a lot of fans” Jungkook said with an unbothered expression on his face. 

“Come on. I didn’t come to this college to collect all these things. I want to study” Taehyung feels frustrated.

He put all of his present aside and took his notes out. Right after that, the lecturers come and explain the analysis of Shakespeare’s writing.
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It is always hard to be born. You know it- the bird has to struggle to get out of the egg. Think back and ask yourself. Was the path really so hard? Was it only hard? Wasn’t it lovely too? Do you wish you had had a prettier, easier way?

She highlighted sentences in a book she just bought, Demian. She loves it. She feels that so many sentences in that book speak for her. 
She always likes books. It brings her to another world. Books, even fiction was so much better than reality, her reality.

“Soojung, stop digging into that novel and eat with us,” said Luna while she fixing her make up. Luna is her college friend, together with Chaeyeon and Solar. They’re the only friend of her. She always thinks that making friends is the hardest thing in her life, so she actually feels thankful for three of them because they’re reaching out to her at the first time. But still, not like three of them, she still finds it hard to open up her feelings.

Soojung was holding a piece of paper filled with her handwriting. She wants to ask their opinion about the poetry she wrote to go into a poetry competition for today.

“Guys, can you—“ She asks with a low voice but solar with a louder voice than her already cut her off.

“Hey, do you remember hoseok from the department of human resources?” asked Solar.

“That cute and talkative guy who has bright personalities who flirts with you?” Luna replied  

“I know him. I heard he’s actually a rapper and recently he released a mixtape or something. Well, I don’t know exactly but the rumors spread like that. Why?” Chaeyeon asked with her usual calm but sarcastic tone. Chaeyeon is that kind of girl who’s pretty and popular so it’s no doubt that she knows every single rumor of other people in this entire population of our college. Well, three of them are popular and pretty. It’s just Soojung who choose to be ‘ordinary’. 

“Oh, really? Well, he’s literally asked me to be his girlfriend yesterday and I don’t know what to answer I mean… hello, there was like five to six guys who line up to become my boyfriend. He’s not my type, sooo I told him that I’ll give the answer next week” she sneered. A second later I hear laughter from all of them.

 
And there it goes, the void. It moves inside my body and does everything it wants. Somethings definitely going to come out of my mouth.

“Chaeyeon, how did you know all those rumors about him? And Luna, can you just—for once, accept a guy who probably really likes you and not judging him? I mean how will you know their real feelings if you can’t even date them seriously?” there you go, the word vomit. 

Silence.

“I don’t feel like eating anymore” 

Soojung rushed to the toilet. She wants to stop the dark void to control her, even in the daylight like this. She always thought the void only comes at three in the morning, but she was wrong.

Sharp pain pricks her head. Now, the cold monster takes over her brain and making her more miserable.

“Come on, I still have statistic class after this. Stop. Please” she mumbled to herself inside the cubicle of the girl's toilet.

2 minutes after, she came out from the toilet like nothing happened. She walks into her next class, statistic. One of five subjects that she hates the most.

“Bayes’ theorem, describes the probability of an event, based on prior knowledge of conditions that might be related to the event. For example, if cancer is related to age, then, using Bayes’ theorem, a person’s age can be used to more accurately assess the probability that they have cancer, compared to the assessment of the probability of cancer made without knowledge of the person's age………” The lecturers keep blabbering about Bayes’ theorem which she can’t even understand. His words don’t even go to her ears, it just diffused inside her class and collide with her sharp pain in her head. 

She can’t concentrate at all, so she takes out the paper with poetry that she made which she haven’t let everyone to see.
Moon, and Dawn.

She doesn’t expect anything with the poetry that she wrote, she’s only writing those words to throw her feelings because paper and pencil was her only thing to spill her feelings. Also, the competition wasn’t the kind of big and fancy competition. The competition was held by a reading community she followed on social media.

She just wishes that this is the only opportunities to remove her dark void, even just bit by bit. Taking out her lump that always there, inside her, controlling her.