Birthday-shot for Dong Bang Shin Ki’s eldest and umma, Kim Youngwoon Jaejoong. Birthday wishes to our loving DBSK’s umma, happy 26^th birthday, oppa! 

 

I do not own Kim Jaejoong, Kim Junsu, Kim Junho or any other artist mentioned in the story. I only own the plot and the fictional characters. This is purely and only for entertainment purposes and I do not mean to tangle any rights of anyone. This story is MY idea, it being like any other story is pure coincidental. Do NOT plagiarize. 

 

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“Anneyong.”

I turned around at the voice at once.

“Um. Anneyonghaseyo?” unsure of what to say, I managed to speak.

The owner of the voice laughed as my dubiousness. “Don’t worry. I won’t eat you.” He came and sat down next to me. I moved away a little, but he only chuckled.

“I just got you away from those guys who were chasing you and those girls who were killing you in their minds. I admit it’s seriously movie-like. But my question is, is this how you thank me?” he asked with fake hurt in his eyes. I quickly tore my gaze away from him.

“Thank you. But I really don’t know you..It’s not appropriate.” I quickly muttered and stood up, but he grabbed my wrist and held me back.

“This is your private spot. Sorry if I intruded. I should be the one leaving.” He said, with his signature smile. I frowned. He was saying this but he was still staying. What’s wrong with his guy?

“Please. I just wanted to get to know you.” He added with a sense of plea in his eyes. I stared back without much emotion in my eyes for a while. He sighed and stood up.

“Alright. Don’t talk. I’m Kim Jaejoong. You would know me, right? I’m from JYJ, former DBSK.” He said, walking up to me. I noted that he still didn’t let go of my hand. I continued to stare back at him.

“Jaejoong. Hero? JYJ? Ring a bell?” he asked again and began doing Get Out’s moves at once. I shook my head and stared at him, blankly.

“I know you. I know DBSK and JYJ. But what I don’t know is why you’re giving such an effort to get to know me.” I bluntly blurted out.

Jaejoong laughed again. “I’ve got several reasons. But believe me, you’d only laugh at how desperate I am if I tell you.” He said.

I cocked my head sideward. “Try me.”

Jaejoong laughed, once again, this time in a more embarrassed way. “I…Well, I don’t want you to think I’m..desperate.”

I rolled my eyes and shot him a look. Spit it out already.

“Fine! I wanted to be friends with someone who didn’t care about me being an idol! All the other girls would just ask for autograph and pictures! I thought that only happened in movies, strangely it isn’t, so I desperately need to make friends with a girl because they’re sensitive and can understand me!” he blurted out.

I was taken aback for a moment. This guy..

“But you just used the fact what you are an idol so that you could get my attention.” I spoke, in the same emotionless voice.

Jaejoong just stared at my eyes with so much emotion in them that I couldn’t tell what his real purpose was.

“Yeah. I did. But did I say I wanted to be friends with you for that fact?” This time, his voice came out different than before. Almost as if…he had read me. As if…he wasn’t really saying the words he wanted to.

“You’re related to our angel face aren’t you?” he asked after a while. At once my stare changed. “Angel face?” I asked him.

He let out a dry chuckle. “Don’t pretend you don’t know. Our Junsu. Kim Junsu. You’re related to him, aren’t you?” he repeated once again.

“Sorry, but I don’t know whom you’re talking about.” I said and tried to wriggle my wrist free from his grasp and walk away, but his grasp only tightened.

“Geogitmal. If you know me, if you know DBSK, if you know JYJ, it’s a sin not to know Junsu.” I heard Jaejoong say. My hands balled into fists as I cringed.

“If I say I am, will you let me go?” I asked without looking back at him. “That might take it to a consideration. Look at me.” he said in a demanding voice.

Normally, I would have scoffed if anyone commanded me to do such a thing so demandingly. But this time, his voice stopped me from doing anything.

“Jebal...”

He tugged my wrist and turned me around, one arm around my waist. It was almost as if it was a scene from a mo—

I shook my head frivolously to get rid of the thought. This guy. I don’t think even an hour had passed after we met and he was getting onto me.

“Look at me, Kim Jeein. How can you not recognize me?” his voice was hurt as he spoke. Rather than the powerful voice of Jaejoong it was more the unique and feminine voice of..

“Jae..Jae?” my head shot up at once as I was slowly able to ask him. A sad smile took over his depressed lips. “Yeah. It’s me.” he muttered.

I kept staring at him as if he wasn’t real. As if he was out of a story. As if he was part of a movie.

“You…you can’t be JaeJae! JaeJae died!” I gasped, cautiously taking steps, one by one, backward as his grip on my waist loosened.

“I’m here. Standing in front of you.” He said with the same face, smile unwavering. Tears began to form inside my eyes.

“How can you be alive? Jun..Junsu shot you!” I said. “Junsu didn’t shoot me. Didn’t I promise you that I’d never leave you? That I’d be back for you? That if Junsu doesn’t take care of you, I’ll beat him up into a bloody pulp?” he asked.

I stopped walking backwards as out arms were extended, while he had been holding on to my wrist, at the most. I felt him slip something onto my middle finger.

Almost as soon as he had, I snatched my wrist away. It was his mother’s ring.

“My mother took the shot for me.”

Flashback

“Oppa! Don’t shoot him! Jebal, Junsu oppa!” I wailed as my so called ‘father’ held me under his grip.

“Too late for that now. If you had stayed away from him as I told you to, we wouldn’t have to go through this. SHOOT HIM, Junsu!” our ‘father’ commanded.

“Oppa! Don’t!” I cried, my eyes darting towards Jaejoong who was beaten up, half to death with a man holding his hair, forcing him to look at his best friend as he shot me.

“Save your sister..Jun..su..” Jaejoong managed to choke out with a smile. Tears streamed down my face.

“Jaejoong-ah!” I wailed. He turned to me with the same smile on his face.

It wasn’t fair! Jaejoong didn’t do ANYTHING to father!

“Junsu oppa! Jebal! We..he’s your best friend!” my voice got weaker and weaker by the second.

“Jee..in…Jae..hyung..” he muttered, his hand shaking as he aimed the gun at Jaejoong. He closed his eyes.

“JAEJOONG!” I shouted. Then I heard a gunshot.

With that…Junsu fell onto the ground. I didn’t even dare look at Jaejoong. I knew he was gone..

Flashback end

“You…” I muttered.

“You lost consciousness. Junsu shot your father. My uncle came just as he did so. We managed to bring you and mother’s dead body out. Both uncle and Junsu thought it would be best if you thought I had died. You wouldn’t suffer more than you already had.” Jaejoong explained, his voice soft, as he slowly rubbed the ring on my finger.

“Jae..joong..” I muttered. His head shot up as he jerked away from me.

“Mi…minahae. I shouldn’t even be here.” He smiled at me, but in his eyes I could have sworn I saw tears forming. “I shouldn’t have come. I really shouldn’t have followed Uee. We won’t have to meet then, would we?” he said.

Before I could answer, he rushed away, leaving me alone on the empty building’s rooftop.

The only sound that surrounded me was that of the cars and other vehicles’ honking from below the building.

I felt tears forming in my eyes and my feet getting spaghetti.

Just at that moment, Uee, yes, AFTERSCHOOL’s Uee, came up and saw me.

“Finally, Jeein!” she groaned. From behind I her, I saw some others, shooting glares at me.

My feet just couldn’t hold the weight of my body. I fell onto my knees.

He was alive.

Jaejoong was alive.

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“Innie-ah~!” I heard a familiar voice calling for me after Uee and I finished our group study and came out of her house. Junho (A/N : Here, I’m referring to Junsu’s brother Junho, or Xuno, not 2PM’s Junho) was waving at me from near his car. I told Uee that I had to go and walked over to him. He was smirking like usual at the girls’ attention on him.

“What, oppa?” I asked, annoyed, walking up to him. “Uh..Junsu-ah and I need to talk to you.” He said as the girls began leaving.

“Why didn’t you tell me Jae was alive?” I said, straightforward as usual. “Jeeinnie-” he started but I stopped him.

“Don’t Jeeinnie me. Just tell me. Why?” I pressed on. “In-ah, there’s a reason why Su and I want to talk to you, you know.” His voice was firmer than before. I knew I couldn’t, wait…more like I shouldn’t argue with him.

I sighed and walked into the car behind him. Little did I know, a familiar blonde was watching me go inside with much depression.

.

When Junho oppa brought me to the apartment which we were sharing (which I have to admit was quite spacy, but then again, Junho oppa is Xuno), Junsu oppa had occupied the couch (to be more accurate, a loveseat since I was very convinced that not many people were going to visit us, or at least I wasn’t going to let them) with himself and…food.

At the sight of me and Junho oppa, Junsu oppa shot up from the couch at once. “My baby Jeeinnie!” he said and opened his arms wide for me to go and hug him. Only, I wasn’t in the mood. I merely glaring at him and walked to my room, banging the door behind me.

“Aish, hyung, how am I supposed to talk to her about this when she’s not in a good mood?” I heard Junsu oppa saying. “I’m putting the blame on Jaejoong hyung for this one. He met her before he was supposed to.” Junho oppa was saying.

“Figures...” Junsu oppa said, annoyed.

I was taken by much shock when a loud banging had begun on the room door (which, at that moment, I was leaning against to listen to their conversation) and jumped.

“INNIE-AH!” Junsu oppa shouted. “Let me in, Innie, we need to talk!” he said. “GO AWAY!” I screamed at the door. “In-ah! Open the door!” this time it was Junho oppa who shouted.

“I said, LEAVE ME ALONE!” I shouted once again, but the banging never stopped. “In-ah, mianhae! We should have told you earlier! But…at least let us explain!” Junsu oppa cried.

“You think just a ‘mianhae’ can make me feel mentally better? Ten freaking years have passed! And all these days, I’ve been thinking Jae was dead! And worse. I’ve been thinking my oppa killed him! Do you have any idea how much I suffered?!” I shouted, my voice cracking at a point. Fighting the tears wasn’t as easy as I thought it would have been. For one thing, it made my head ache like hell.

“Mianhae, In..But what would you have done if we told you that hyung was alive? You’d be restless!” he said.

“Maybe, maybe not! How would you know when you didn’t even tell me?! And I thought you wanted the best for me! But after you became famous, both of you have been paying less and less attention to me! After I thought I lost Jae all I wanted was to have my brothers’ love!” I couldn’t continue. I had so much in my heart that I wanted to let out, but..

“We do love you!” this time it was Junho oppa. “Then why don’t you want me to be with Jae? Why are you not letting me be?” I asked, my voice getting weaker and weaker by the minute.

“Because…you’d only get more hurt, Innie..” Junho oppa softly said. “GEOGITMAL! You think having me think Jae died would make me happy than knowing that he’s alive?!” I cried.

I received no answer. “Heh. That’s what I thought..” I coldly scowled before jumping into the bed and crying until I fell asleep.

.

“She’s still asleep..” I heard a faint whisper as I began to open my eyes. “Don’t do this to her, Su-ah.” I heard another voice say. Wanting to hear more of the conversation, I kept my eyes closed and listened more. I recognized the first voice as Junsu oppa’s and the second as Jaejoong’s.

“Hyung, you’re not allowed to date. None of us are! I don’t want Jeeinnie to suffer anymore heartbreaks.” Junsu oppa said. “I know! Just don’t fight, both of you..” Jaejoong’s voice was low.

“Why did you tell her yourself, hyung? You should have waited for us to tell her. At least that would have caused less pain for all four of us.” Junsu oppa asked. “I still love her, Junsu-ah. How do you think I was able to survive seeing her in the front row in every one of our concerts with Junho yet not being able to tell her that?” Jaejoong asked, rather than answered.

I heard Junsu oppa sigh. “Junho hyung and I are excellent siblings. Why can’t we be with Innie? We both love her so much that…so much that we even hid you so that she might get a new life and move on.” He said.

I could feel tears forming in my closed eyes as soon as I heard Junsu oppa say so. Was that what he wanted me to do? Just move on with my life and forget that my brothers made me think that they killed my first and only love of my life?!

I rolled over and buried my face in the pillows that surrounded me. Just as I did so, I felt a rough hand gently caress me cheeks.

“I love you and miss you so damn much, Jeen-ah..you have no idea how much I want to stay with you..” I heard Jaejoong oppa’s croaking whisper.

“Then why aren’t you?” I whispered just enough so only I could hear, but it turned out Jaejoong heard too. “You’re awake?” I heard him ask.

What was the point of pretending? I turned to face him then asked him directly, “Why aren’t you staying with me, then?”

“Innie..” Junsu oppa whispered. “Why did you lie to me? Why didn’t you come back to me?” I kept questioning him, despite the fact that I was already crying.

“I want you to have someone who can give their time to you! Someone who can always be with you. Someone who can give their love and protection to you at all times…unlike me.” Jaejoong said.

I glared at him, through my teary eyes. “That all?” I asked him. He didn’t reply. “You idiot.” I growled. Then without a word, ran outside with no set destination in mind.

.

In the end, I ended up being with AFTERSCHOOL (whom I was well acquainted with through Junho oppa), drunk and out of my mind.

“Kahi unnieee~!” I slurred. “What is it like being in lurrrve?”

Kahi unnie, who was also very drunk, looked at me with a…drunken gaze? She was drunk, so obviously she looked drunk.

“Being in love is being in a peeeeeeeeeet!~ You fall in and in and in and then THUD!” she shouted and slammed her fist onto the table. “You fall face first on the ground and he leaves you and the pain neeeeeever goes away!” she screamed.

“Heh. Aaaall guys are alike.” Jooyeon unnie slurred. “Unnie…stop speaking..” Lizzy helplessly whispered. “They make you drunk, take your ity away and throw you away~!” Uee gurgled.

“This story. The guy pretends to get killed. The girl’s brothers pretend to kill the guy. And the girl cries and cries and cries. And when the guy finally comes to her, she walks out on him.” I said.

“Booooooo!” Jungah, Kahi, Jooyeon and Uee shouted. “That guy is LAME!”

The next thing I knew, a pair of strong arms was carrying me away from AFTERSCHOOL who were whining and booing at whoever was carrying me.

.

“AHJUSSHI! You can’t just kidnap me like this! You have to ask for permission!” I shouted. “Jeennie..” I heard the person who was carrying me say. I laughed loudly and unwomanly.

“Yer know what? That’s what my undead boyfriend used to call me! And I was just talking about him to the unnies!” I cried. “And what’s more ironic, you’re going to kidnap me and me! Just like what Raina unnie said!” I laughed.

“I’m not going to you…”

“AAAAAAAAH. !” I screamed. But somehow, no one paid attention. It was almost as if they knew I was drunk. “Why isn’t anyone paying any attention to me?” I whined.

“Even Junsu oppa and Junho oppa needs to pay more attention to their career! Even JaeJae pretended to die so that he can move on! Why does everyone not pay attention to me!” I cried with my tears streaming endlessly.

“Why doesn’t JaeJae or anyone else love me anymore…why isn’t there time for them to be with me?” with that, the whole atmosphere turned black.

.

When I finally gain consciousness, my head was ready to burst apart. Either that, or it already burst apart and put itself back together and was again going to burst apart. The downs of drinking in the middle of the day…

The middle of the day..

At once, my head shot towards both my sides. There were no open window, the curtains blocked my view if there were and the door of the room I was in was closed.

The room!

It wasn’t my room, that was one thing I was sure of. My room was not coloured hot pink.

Once again, I my eyes roughly scanned the room. This time, I caught a body of a male lying on a chair a bit far away from the bed, facing a TV.

Ignoring (or at least trying to ignore) the killer hangover which I was suffering, I stood up from the bed and slowly walked over to the chair.

Jaejoong…

I clutched my hair firmly and tried to remember what I had said and what I had done when I was drunk. Did I do anything to him?

I saw that his cheeks were slightly wet, so were his eyelashes. Had he cried?

I noticed that he had a pen in his hand, almost falling out of his hand almost in his grip. Near the chair there was a fallen book. Cautiously, I picked it up and opened to the last page which had been written in it.

26^th January 2012

I told Jeen about me. But…it didn’t go as I expected to. As if Jeen didn’t feel glad seeing me.

Well, I know I wouldn’t. We had all made her thought that I died. I know I would go crazy if Junsu told me that she died.

I wanted to spend today with her since it’s my birthday. So that…so that it would be special.

Aish. Why did I tell her? Couldn’t I have just taken her out without telling her that it was me? That way, none of us would have suffered.

Jeennie had a fight with Junho and Junsu. They said she kept insisting that they didn’t have time for her. When I went to the apartment, she was asleep.

Her face didn’t even change a bit. Okay, it was more mature and all, but it was no less angelic that it was ten years ago.

Even we had a little quarrel. I told her why I couldn’t be with her. Or at least half of it. It wasn’t like after the SM things I can ever let fans know that I had someone whom I loved. They might get the wrong idea and…and Jeen might get in danger.

Jeen walked out on me.

It was so depressing.

Whoever knew Jeen-ah drank? I ran to her and AFTERSCHOOL while I was coming back home. She was drunk. Seriously drunk.

Saying stuff about us not having time for her…

It hurt, but it was the truth. The truth hurt. We didn’t have time for her. How can I ever show her I love her when I don’t have time? Should I retire? I would, but…but stepmother would not like that. I should have to talk to her and noonas about it…

Noonas would understand. Especially Jini noona. Should I talk to her? Only Junsu and Junho know that I was almost killed. And by Junsu, nonetheless. Only for loving Jeennie…

I really shouldn’t love Jeein…it would only get her in trouble. Imagine what would have happened if someone else besides me had found her drunk.

I’m the cause of all her troubles. I…I’m such an annoyance to her.

But I’m too much in love with her. Just once…just once, all I want is to hear her say ‘happy birthday’ to me in her cute little voice which she talked to me with.

That’s my only wish.

Yunho…Changmin…

I love them both too. I love them both a lot. But…I love Jeennie waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more.

My birthday wish…heck, my Cassiopeia wish…is just to hear her say ‘I love you’ or at least ‘happy birthday’ before tonight’s twelve’s last …

I wasn’t someone who’d cry so easily but that day, I hadn’t been doing anything but crying.

I saw a wall clock handing in the wall in front of us. The time was nine thirty.

I gently Jaejoong’s cheek.

I was such a spoilt brat. I hadn’t even listened to their side of the story. All they did…it was all for me. They had said that before but…I had thought that Jaejoong was all that because he was selfish.

Once again, I glanced at the clock. Exactly two and half hours till twelve.

I didn’t want to wake Jaejoong up. He must have had a hard night because of me.

Guiltily, yet softly, after pressing my lips on his wet right cheek for a second or two, I quietly exited the room into Jaejoong’s luxurious apartment.

Much to my surprise, it was only the room that had so much difference from Junho oppa and my apartment. The rest was almost the same. But of course, Jaejoong’s creativity was there.

After a minute or two of examining, I walked over to the kitchen. It was his birthday, I had to do at least something. Even if it was just a little thing..

.

As I silently entered the room with my both hands full, I took another glance at the clock on the wall. It was eleven forty already. If Jaejoong didn’t wake up soon, I mightn’t be able to fulfil his wish…

Placing all that was in my hands on an empty coffee table in a nice order and walked to the chair Jaejoong was sleeping on. He still hadn’t shown any sign of waking up. I couldn’t blame him.

For the next five minutes, I paced to and fro in the room, waiting for Jaejoong to wake. But finally, when he didn’t wake up, I walked over to him and sat on my knees, facing him.

I gently brushed some of his hair strands aside. His mouth was open, like usual when he slept after being very tired. His long eyelashes were now dry, completely having no sign of him crying. So were his cheeks.

I tried to resist the temptation, but I couldn’t. I gently touched his lips, wondering if they would still feel the same on mine. I felt a blush creeping up my face at the thought.

Jaejoong slightly twitched, causing me to jump a few steps back. He moved a little in the chair and slowly began to open his eyes.

“Jeen-ah? You..you’re okay?” he asked as soon as he saw me. “A little hangover when I first woke up but kind of okay now..” I admitted, refusing to meet his eyes, mine set directly on the ground.

A moment passed without us saying anything until Jaejoong spoke. “Jeein-ah…mian..we should have told you..” he muttered. At the words, I felt tears filling my eyes.

“I…I didn’t want you to suffer more. But…I guess I made you suffer more than I thought I would have..”

“Shut up..” I growled at him.

“Mianhae..”

“You have no idea how much you made me grieve. Every night, I’d see the picture of you and me and think that you would never ever be by my side when I sleep. How could you be by my side? You were gone..”

“I should have told..”

I fell onto my knees. “I’d get drunk…then suffer from killer hangovers every morning. If AFTERSCHOOL wasn’t there for me when they were…I really would have been nothing.”

“Jeen..” Jaejoong muttered, enfolding his arms around me.

“Yah. Jaejoong-ah..” I said, finally looking up at him. His warm brown eyes, filled with both worry and concern looked at me, waiting for me to continue. I squeezed my eyes shut for a moment then looked back into his eyes again.

“Do you still love me?”

The question was short and direct. The answer was just one simple word. Either yes, or no.

Jaejoong’s eyes softened. My gaze moved from his eyes to his lips.

“I never stopped loving you.” He said.

Once again, my eyes got teary. Only this time, it wasn’t tears of sadness of grieving. It was tears of joy.

I buried my face in his chest as tears fell endlessly. “I was wrong…I never listened to you..” I wasn’t able to finish.  I was crying too much.

Jaejoong gently comforted me in his arms. I wanted to stay in that position forever.

After I was able to get a hang of myself, I stole a glance at the clock. Twelve fifty five.

I managed to smile at him. “Ssaengil chukkhamnida, JaeJae!” I exclaimed. He looked shocked. Probably at the fast change in my mood?

I took his hand and lead him towards the coffee table. “It…it was the least I could do.” I said. I had baked a cake and written ‘Happy Birthday’ on it with three candles which I managed to find after going through a lot of cupboards. “I..I’m sorry if I couldn’t make it spec-”

Before I could finish my sentence, Jaejoong’s lips were pressed on mine, his arms walling me between him and the bed. “All I want for my birthday is you.” He said. I smiled.

“Ssengil chukkhamnida, Kim Jaejoong. Saranghaeyo.” I softly whispered to him. He smiled back and once again pressed his lips on mine.

Little did I know that the candles light were reflecting well onto the wall clock much like a movie scene. Aish. This Jaejoong. Getting into me…

00.00am

Right on twelve o’clock.