Chapter 1: Layovers

“Have you seen my tie?” Taeyong asked frantically digging through a box of Lego’s in his sister's house. He was just about to leave the house for work and of course, it was during these crucial moments when he misplaced his tie or his name tag or his good pair of black socks like always.

He was rushing. Again.

“I think it was on the sofa. You let your niece play with it.” His sister said, wiping her wet hands on her apron.

“Thanks for letting me stay for a few days.” He kissed her cheek and fumbled with his tie at the same time but his sister took it from him, smoothing it into his suit jacket.

“It’s okay. It was nice having you visit. But I swear to god Taeyong when are you going to start actually seeing people? Like actual dating!” His sister groaned.

"You know I'm married to my job. Besides they just promoted me to a chief flight attendant."

“Taeyong you need to get out more honey.” She tutted.

“You should really stop trying to set me up on blind dates. They never end well.” Taeyong shook his head then shivered at the last blind date he was forced into.

"I wouldn't have to if you just set up a Tinder profile."

"He was married!” Taeyong exclaimed, exasperated at his single status is constantly the subject of scrutiny in the family.

"Wow, you're really gonna hold that against me forever aren't you?"

"With three kids noona!"

"Okay, okay... I promise I won't meddle with your love life anymore. But you have to promise me you'll at least try to get out more. I don't like seeing you so..." Her face softened and she straightened his tie. " So lonely. You're not hung up on him still right?" Taeyong knew who she was referring too but he doesn’t want to say the name out loud.

"It's been years." He dismissed her.

"Time doesn't really mean a thing when it comes to love." She patted his cheek and accompanied him to the door.

"You're being too cringey too early in the morning."

"Call me when you get to LA.”

"I will. Thanks, noona!" He said before tugging his suitcase and ducking into his awaiting uber.

He was in a good mood that day, just off a long weekend break and ready to take on the world. Lee Taeyong took pride in his level-headed meticulousness; it's his great attention to detail and attentiveness to his surroundings that allowed him to flourish the way he did as a flight attendant. It's just the way he always is- sensitive and polite and eager to please. That's why management finally noticed his efforts and his hard work, enough to promote him to be a chief flight attendant, and he was over the moon with happiness.

He was beaming on the way to the offices, ready to check the details of his leg on the system. He quickly found an unoccupied computer and found his flight details, printing out a few lists he would need. But then he read the names of the pilots and he froze.

Second officer: Nakamoto Yuta.
First officer: Johnny Seo.
Captain (PIC): Jung Jaehyun.

Taeyongs mind went blank for a good 5 seconds.

Jung Jaehyun.

He shivered, then shook his head.
No. He was professional and on top of his game. He wouldn’t let anything cloud his judgement. Not even his ex. Not even Jung ing perfect Jaehyun.

He remembered only fractions of their brief relationship, the rest was a blur of dark and light moments like there were always too many shadows or too many spotlights.
He remembered the first moment he saw Jaehyun in his uniform, fresh-faced, just out of flight school and those goddamn dimples and crescent-like eyes that appeared when he smiled and Taeyong just melted. He just melted into that boy.

And he remembered being flustered and shy when Jaehyun first approached him in the staff room, with his hands rubbing his nape shyly and a light pink dusting his cheeks, brazenly asking if he was busy that Friday night. He remembered forgetting his phone number when Jaehyun asked for it.

He remembered their first date too when Jaehyun’s flight was delayed and Taeyong had a lunch break and so they spent that small gap just talking at a small corner in a cafe in the terminal, drinking lattes and he remembered Jaehyun drawing his likeness on his napkin and making him laugh with his stupid dad jokes.
He remembered the first time they spent the night together at Jaehyun’s apartment. It was abrupt and unplanned and Taeyong has never been so swept up so passionately like that. Every touch seemed to ignite some kind of untapped fire in his bones and he felt so so loved to be in those arms, to feel those lips on his, to hear someone else call his name so softly like that. And they ended up opening a tub of Ben and Jerry’s cookie dough whilst watching Game of Thrones that night, legs intertwined, poking each other with their cold spoons.

He remembered their first fight too.

But not really.

He doesn’t recall what it was about but the tension has been brewing there for a while. Too many missed calls and missed dates and less time just talking to each other.
One day he’d be in Dubai managing systems there when Jaehyun was in Germany and the next he’d be back in Seoul when the other was in Jakarta. It was just too many miles apart, too many time zones apart and it certainly felt like a thousand skies apart too. Their romance had been plagued with jet lag and envy and it was just... impossible to have any more moments of intimacy, of them.

And one day after an exhausting day at work Taeyong was about to finish writing his reports on a malfunction with one of the checking logs when he saw Jaehyun and a pretty flight attendant laughing together, sharing a cup of coffee that should have been his.

Too clingy. Too close. Too friendly.

"Please, have you seen the way half the stewardesses flirt with you?"

"As if they don't flirt with you Captain Jung Jaehyun."

"Stop that you know I would never go that far with any of the stewardesses."

And Taeyong tried really hard not to be. But he was tired and this was going nowhere.

Nine months.

They had lasted for nine months before it became clear that it wasn’t going to work out. And as much as Taeyong would like to admit he tried, he can’t really say they were prepared for that kind of commitment, that kind of relationship. He was a jealous person, and Jaehyun was a very sociable handsome man who held hearts in vain.
He doesn’t remember who told who first. But he remembers the flash of hurt that passed through Jaehyun’s eyes. And he remembered them fighting again. He remembered crying that night when Jaehyun left him even though he saw it happening a long time ago.

He remembered not functioning for a month and just drowning in his work until his flight attendant friend, Ten, asked if he wanted to switch to the flight crew. Three years later of successfully working hard and avoiding his ex, he narrowly managed to avoid him altogether at the airport and offices and since he was just a normal flight attendant before, there really was no need to interact with pilots directly. But he’s finally here; chief flight attendant and his first day with none other than pilot-in-charge Jung Jaehyun.
He knew he would have to face him sooner or later.

It's been five minutes since they had made eye contact and Taeyong can't meet his eyes again. Doesn't dare to. They were on the shuttle on the way to the plane and having a brief about the flight.

There is a strange tension no one wants to mention and it was no secret why. Johnny and Yuta and most of the crew were mutual friends of both the captain and the head flight attendant. They all knew how that ended.

Taeyong tried not to stare too much. Though admittedly, the charm and appeal of the uniform never really faded away. The suit and the hat and his epaulettes that had proud, golden stripes never really ran out of style. Or maybe because Jaehyun was just ridiculously handsome. Probably both.
“As you know I’m your captain Jaehyun and the first and second officers on this flight today will be Johnny and Yuta here to LAX. I hope we have a good run and a great flight together. If you’re in need of any assistance don’t hesitate to call on me or the rest of the crew.”
Jaehyun glanced at Taeyong who was busy reading and rechecking the list of crew members, making sure all their medicals and passports were fine. He still looked so beautiful and pure. So oblivious to everyone’s stares and constant praise.

“Everything seems okay.” He told Yuta who nodded and smiled.

“You’re doing a good job Taeyong-ah. Relax a bit.”

“Thanks.” A stab of jealousy blossomed in Jaehyun’s heart. He used to be the source of Taeyong’s smile, the cause of his laughter, the reason his eyes would crinkle in delight every time he said something witty.

But it’s different now.

He wonders if Taeyong thinks of him at least a bit, at random points in the day when he sees a napkin, or when he watched TV and a show they used to watch together would come on, or every time he eats ice cream. He wondered if he ever makes an appearance in his dreams and plagued his nights.

He wondered if there was spite there if he did.

He wondered if there was still love there.

He wondered if at moments like these where they were forced to work with each other if he is attacked by tidal waves of memories.

Because it feels that way for Jaehyun.

Later on, the plane when the trio of pilots was checking the control panels, Taeyong peeked through with a polite smile on his face. Jaehyun knew that smile. It was his professional game face on, of reserved over-civility, it was for the passengers, for the crew, for him now.

“Hey, guys. What would you like to have in your holders?”

“Just plain water for me and Jae. Yuta?” Johnny answered.

“Diet Coke please.” Yuta chimed in.

“For lunch, we have sea bass or roasted lamb with rosemary.”

“The sea bass sounds good. What do you want Jae?”

“I think I’ll have the lamb.”

“Of course. You were always a meat person.” Taeyong said unwittingly.

“What?”

“Nothing.” He blushed, dropping his head slightly at his slip.

“Yuta?”

“I think I’ll have the lamb too. Thank’s Taeyong.”

“Do you guys want your lunch earlier or later?”

“I don’t know about you all, but I’m starving,” Johnny said.

“Me too actually.”

“Then we’ll have our lunches earlier Taeyong-ssi.” Jaehyun clarified. It felt weird. Saying his name without the hyung fixed at the back or Taeyongie or his rap alter ego TY Track or simply Yong. It felt too wrong.

“Y-yes okay I’ll be back with your drinks.” He stuttered, going back to the first class galley.

"I'm going to check the engine and wheels." Jaehyun sighed, taking out a fluorescent jacket and a pair of noise-cancelling headphones and heading down onto the tar.

“Taeyong just got promoted as chief flight attendant didn’t he?” Johnny asked Yuta now that Jaehyun was gone.

“Yes.”

“Fate has a way of being very ironic doesn't it ?”

“Very.” Yuta grinned, then shook his head.

"You think they'll ever... ya know..."

"I'm not a psychic Johnny."

"Of course it's just... they were good together. It's a shame." Johnny shrugged but he always felt saddened by his friends being unable to reconcile.

"True. I mean Jesus when they're in a room together it just reeks of unresolved ual frustration." Yuta groaned and Johnny laughed loudly, unable to hold back a smile.

Just as the seatbelt light came on and the chime went off Taeyong was already on his feet preparing some snacks for the pilots as Ten and Kun both started preparing the lunches for the first class galley.

He cautiously entered the cockpit with a basket of snacks and drinks.

“Sorry, I’m late.”

“It’s okay Taeyong.” Johnny smiled good-naturedly. He passed them their drinks and was about to unpack some more snacks when Jaehyun cut him off.

"Why is Johnny's water cold and mine isn't?" He didn’t think his words would come out as harshly but they do and he knows it’s because he felt that maybe Taeyong was playing favourites and he had an ego to uphold and Taeyong made him tense. The poor flight attendant quickly becomes flustered, trying to find words to explain.

"S-sorry... I uh... well I heard you coughing just now s-so- you know what let me get you another bottle.” Taeyong reached out for the bottle in Jaehyun’s grip but Jaehyun pulled it away. Becoming even more flustered, Taeyong glances up to meet his eyes, half annoyed and half embarrassed.

But Jaehyun is blushing too. He is too pale to hide the flush on his face and his neck. And he is too transparent to hide his surprise.

"Oh... it's okay. I’m sorry. Thank you for... for noticing." He nodded dumbly, putting the bottle into his holder.
Johnny and Yuta share a knowing look of glee but their lips remained restrained and pursed.

"Wouldn't want the captain to get sick after all." Taeyong reasoned, brushing his jacket needlessly.

I wouldn't want you to get sick you .

"Of course. Thank you Taeyong.”

“I’ll serve you lunch in half an hour. But here’s some bread rolls and nuts to nibble on if you’re peckish.” He takes out a large plastic bag full of bread rolls and biscuits and aeroplane nuts which Yuta smugly reaches for like a child.

“Bless your soul Lee Taeyong.”

An hour later, Taeyong does serve them lunch, he silently passed a packet of cough drops to Jaehyun who whispered thanks. Jaehyun doesn’t really know what else to say.

Three hours into the flight Johnny whined that he wanted to go to the toilet and Yuta called for Taeyong. As was standard procedure, the flight attendant had to be in the cockpit when one of the pilots went to the lavatory. Yuta took over Johnny’s seat and Taeyong entered, looking more tired than before.. the bags underneath his eyes becoming more obvious.

“Taeyong-ah,” Yuta called out, a gleeful smile gracing his lips.

“Hmm?”

“You look tired.”

“That’s what happens when you have to push a thirty-pound service cart up and down a plane Nakamoto Yuta.”

“Sarcasm suits you well.” Yuta grinned and patted the seat behind him. “You can rest if you want. Just sit and close your eyes for a minute.”

“It’s okay, my break is in an hour.” Taeyong shook his head and sat on the seat.

“Hey whatever happened to that date you told me about? Some business dude.” Yuta suddenly said, making Taeyong panic. Jaehyun cleared his throat, uncomfortable already and it's only been one minute with Taeyong in the cockpit.

“It w-went fine.” He detected the lie in the elder's voice but it still irked him nonetheless. He knew when Taeyong lied. A decade, no, a century could've passed but he knew. The idea of Taeyong dating someone else.

“Ah, so you’re dating now?”

“No. It just ... didn’t click. I don’t think I have time to date anyway.”

“Say, Jae, when’s the last time you went on a date hm? You too should get out more. You’re so obsessed with your jobs.”

“I wonder what’s taking Johnny so long?” Taeyong said out loud.

“Probably flirting with Ten,” Jaehyun replied tersely. He knew his co-pilots were in cahoots. And though he was somewhat touched that they would care enough to into his love life recklessly, like newborn hurricanes in the sea, he was still annoyed to be put in such a position. He was the pilot-in-charge for s sakes, He didn't need a set up like this. He promptly pressed the call button to the first class, a little to harshly, it ringed twice before Kun picked it up.
 

"Tell Johnny and Ten to break it up."

"How do you even know they're talking to each other?" Kun asked, surprised, but Jaehyun merely rolled his eyes. Oh, he knew.

"Instinct." Jaehyun almost growled over the intercom.

Yuta and Taeyong remained silent. Taeyong had his eyes trained on the vastness of the sky. Jaehyun knew how much Taeyong liked the skies, especially from the cockpit, how seamless and big it looked. How open, how warm. he told him that one day when they sat on Jaehyun's couch. It is a vague memory, but he remembered skimming Taeyong's cheek with fingertips whilst he read the same page of some Dan Brown novel. And Taeyong had his head on his lap, murmuring something about data encryption being a 'bloody labyrinth this time'. He remembered tossing his book and pulling Taeyong into his lap, the other squealing startled, and he remembered kissing him silly till he was whining and gasping and pouting.

Jaehyun realised he was staring off into the same distant sky as the door of the cockpit slid open and Johnny slipped in, making way for Taeyong to slip out of the cockpit silently. He thought it was ironic that they were starring at the same sky just a minute ago; when it felt like they were a thousand skies apart.
The cockpit door slipped open and Johnny entered, making way for Taeyong to quickly slip out silently too. If he noticed the strange atmosphere, he is clever enough not to ask aloud.

“You did that on purpose.” Jaehyun tried to keep his voice calm, but it breaks slightly and he cannot mask his feelings of being betrayed.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Yuta replied calmly.

Jaehyun may be flying an aeroplane, but he felt strangely vulnerable in that moment.