“I’m home” Jihoon yelled into the empty space, he the light and let out a sigh ‘Of course nobody would say anything Lee Jihoon, nobody is here, you are alone’ he put down his bag and sat down on the black sofa in the living room stared into the empty apartment blankly ‘it’s been 6 months, you should get used to it already’ suddenly feeling much more terrible after a rough day at work he decided to just lie down on the sofa put his hand behind his head staring into the white ceiling now while thinking what had gone wrong in his life, he never felt so miserable like then. The feeling was unpleasant, he felt empty and lonely at the same time. ‘Maybe because I had a rough day’ Jihoon told himself more like lying to himself to make himself better. After spending 10 minutes stared blankly into the ceiling he sat up and rubbed his tired eyes trying to chase the miserable feeling he had, when the feeling remained Jihoon stood up walked to his bathroom ‘maybe a shower would do me good’

Jihoon brushed his tooth while staring at himself on the mirror, eye bag hanging clearly under his eyes, messy hair after a shower, he realized he didn’t look any better, he still looked miserable ‘what had gone wrong?’ again, Jihoon asked himself. He rinsed his mouth and went out from the bathroom to kitchen found himself famished after a long miserable day without food. He took two instant noodles from the cabinet and started to cook while humming softly, Jihoon brought the cooked noodle to the table in the dining room “Ya! The noodle is ready!” nobody responded to what he said and again he felt he was being an idiot ‘Lee Jihoon, you are alone, accept it!’ he took his chopstick and started to eat the noodle, weird, it tasted weird eventhough it was the same noodle he had always eaten, there was something missing on it and Jihoon didn’t want to know why. He knew the answer but he refused to let it come out to his mind, not even finishing ¼ of the noodle Jihoon felt his stomach refused to take it already. He put down his chopstick and threw the rest of the noodle into a trash bin

He felt terrible the moment he saw his bedroom, nothing was wrong from the room, it just… the scent, the memories, all hit him at once when he had had enough of the day, trying to brave himself Jihoon lied down on the bed, he turned to one side and looked at the empty space beside him, the empty space which usually occupied by his other half, it had been 6 months and Jihoon didn’t know why he still felt miserable, he couldn’t sleep, he keep staring at the empty space when he closed his eyes he opened it the next second wished his other half was suddenly appeared there, but no, he wasn’t there and maybe because it was snowing outside Jihoon felt really emotional, the empty white bed sheet which usually made him calm didn’t work that time. When Jihoon nearly broke down he felt his phone vibrating, there was a video call request he glanced at the name before he took it the next second

“Hi”

“Hi” Jihoon said trying to look normal but no, the person who called him could read him better than himself did so when the other person frowning on the screen he wasn’t surprised

“What happened?”

“It’s empty…” Jihoon didn’t even try to lie, knew he didn’t have to hide anything from the person

“Baby…”

“Seungcheol-ah… I’m sorry” Jihoon said suddenly

“Sorry for? I’m the one who is sorry here, I wished I was there beside you right now” Jihoon noticed Seungcheol was lying down too, when they were on call like this it felt like Seungcheol was just next to him and gradually Jihoon felt better

“When I opened our apartment’s door just now… I thought you were here, for a moment I forgot you were not here, I said ‘I’m home’ but nobody said anything, I even cooked noodles for two, but I barely eat the noodle, it tasted different without you, I keep having this terrible feeling and when you call me right now, when I’m talking to you like this now I know, this feeling I had is because you were not here… I miss you… I really miss you” Jihoon was in a mess the moment he let out everything on his mind

“Ji…” Seungcheol said after Jihoon had stopped crying but still sniffling “I know you are stronger than you think you are, the past 6 months are hard, not only for you but for me too, and by this distance it doesn’t make what we have right now lesser, I miss you, everyday feels different and empty without you, but by this distance too I realize we are getting stronger, you and I. There will be more challenges in front of us, if we can pass something like this long business trips like this I believe we can challenge many more in the future so Ji…” When Jihoon finally looked at Seungcheol on the screen the older smiled to him “Smile for me please?”

“I’m not that cheap, you think by telling me all these sweet words I could melt just like that? My smile is expensive” Jihoon sulked but turned into a laugh few seconds later when Seungcheol laughed “Buy me something expensive from New York silly boy, taking care of this apartment alone is not easy” Jihoon turned around and lied down properly, took the blanket and covered himself

“I will, don’t worry, it’s just few more days, hang in there” Seungcheol grinned

“Few more days?!! You should’ve told me earlier! You wasted my tears for nothing!” Jihoon barked

“Ya! Shouldn’t you be happy instead of saying something terrible like that? Your boyfriend is finally coming back home after 6 months! It wasn’t a nice thing to say to welcome me” Seungcheol frowned

“Stop overreacting, God, now I feel really ridiculous for crying just now”

“Why?! I feel loved! It was the best 5 minutes of my life!” Seungcheol protested

“So when are you coming back home to be exact?” Jihoon asked

“Why? Do you want to wait at the airport so we could film a drama scene there?” Seungcheol wiggled his eyes playfully

“No, just want to make sure all the things I asked you to buy will reach safely”

“I knew it” Seungcheol rolled his eyes while Jihoon chuckling

“Comeback safely hyung, I miss you” Jihoon said at last,

“It’s been a while since you called me that” Seungcheol smiled fondly “Sure, I’ll comeback safely baby, and I miss you too”

I  miss you, I miss you, I miss you, those mantra I keep yelling inside my mind whenever I wished you were there beside me…

“Hello” Jihoon picked up the call immediately

“Jihoon…”

“Seungkwannie? What’s wrong, I’m on the way to the airport now”

“Seungcheol… his plane…. Was crashed, he didn’t make it Ji… he’s gone”

And Jihoon’s world turns black immediately.