“Stop it!” you remarked as you try to avoid your brother’s camera. “I told you I don’t wanna be seen in your vlog” you unconsciously pouted when he didn’t pay attention to your concern.

You exhaled a sharp breath as you once again put your fingers on the neck of the guitar, placing your index on the third string of the second fret while your middle finger on the first string, your ring finger is now on the second string of the next fret.

“And yes, ladies and gents, that’s my sister who got her talent in playing guitar from his handsome brother—no other than me”

It made you glare at his back for almost a minute, not minding the camera, before putting down the guitar carefully.

“I’ll tell Mom we’re gonna go get some lobsters without you. Bye”

It didn’t take a second for you to regret vomiting those words out when he was already dashing his way before you. To make things worse, he’s seated across you an hour after with a big smile flashed on his face, wiggling his eyebrows.

“Thanks for the lobsters”, he eagerly stated while patiently waiting for the love his life as he fidget over his camera.

You wanted to tell your mother about his vlogging but you’re pretty sure your mom will just tell you to let him be.

“Do you want me to eat you instead of this lobster? I love chicken so much, you know?!” you hissed “Let me eat this thing in peace!”

“Oh, sister… you’re so cute when you’re mad”

“Stop quarreling and eat”, your mom remarked

“Yes, Mom. Love you” your brother responded, still with a smile “Anyway, I’ll go to my friend’s place with Brian after this”

“Bring your sister”

“Mom!” you wanted to whine more but you know it won’t do anything.

Your heart started beating faster than normal. If it’s because of the thought of seeing that guy in black sleeveless again or the thought of being surrounded by people while you do nothing the whole time, you don’t know. It’s the latter, right? But if it’s the former, then most probably it’s because he’s seen what you wrote. You really don’t like it when people you know read your works. And thinking you’ll see him again makes you feel anxious.

It’s not that you know him but you’re being acquainted with him already.

“You should be friends with Dowoon. You go to the same school”, Jae suggested

“I don’t see him around”

“I bet you’re not even familiar with most of your classmates’ faces”

-

Wonpil was the one who opened the gate and welcomed you with a warm smile.  Your heartbeat getting faster at each step you take. Hearing the voices of the other guys inside didn’t help.

Startled a bit by a dog running towards you, the guy following it didn’t even give your heart a chance to rest.

“Tori, don’t run away”, he noted as he chases the dog running around you, making you stand stiffly from discomfort.

When Tori, the dog, ran to Brian, the owner composed himself, letting his back face you and with his lopsided smile, looked at you over his shoulder. “Hi”

Surprised, it took you a second or two to respond. You didn’t even realize you were holding your breath until you had to say “Hello” in response. Hearing your voice crack made you wince a bit and that being the reason for the curve of his lips grow more made you want to hide yourself in your pocket.

Not long enough, you found yourself playing with Tori in the couch of Dowoon’s studio. At least with her, you somehow feel you’re not out of place since she’s just new to the house, too—and also a girl.

The long table welcomes you when you enter that room; a couch leaning on the wall and a computer in the corner. There’s a half wall dividing that part of the room from where the instruments are.

You were too preoccupied the first time you went at his house. Now that you’re back there, and even went to the other part of the house, made you think how loaded his family is and made you admire his house especially the room you’re at right now.

Not that you envy him though. Your family is quite comfortable with life, too. It just made you think how nice it would be to have a room like this where you can write your thoughts and freely paint the words from abstract to a concrete tale; or let the melodies speak your sentiments when your hands and guitar collide.

“So let’s just record some covers for now and one of these days we’ll do Jae’s song and Brian’s, too?” Sungjin asked in confirmation and the rest responded with ‘yes’.

Going to Dowoon’s house became a frequent thing. As time pass by it became more frequent until it became a regular agenda. Sometimes, you’d even go there straight from school. Other times, you’d arrive there with no one else around, not even Dowoon, but you somehow gotten used to going in and out of that place even being alone.

Even though you both go to the same school, you didn’t get the chance to walk together with him to his house. Not that you want that though. Why would you, right? You haven’t really had proper conversation and it makes you anxious when he’s around. And the fact that he hasn’t said anything about your work yet doesn’t help. It feels like he knows a secret of yours that no one else does and that you should be good to him or else he’d tell it to anyone. It’s like you’re being blackmailed when you’re actually not.

“Hi”

Immediately, you turned your head to the door. And as expected, it was Dowoon. Who else would own that deep voice but him? He’s wearing a three-quarter length black shirt with buttons. It has a white rectangle design in both sleeves with an ‘x’ in it.

“Hello”, you replied softly.

He smiled subtly but not subtle enough for you to not notice it. And as much as you want to convince yourself that it doesn’t affect you, your heart betrays you for pounding so hard that you can almost hear it. What’s wrong with you? And the next thing that caught your eyes were his ears engulfed in red to his neck.

You shrugged it off as he continued walking towards his computer.

“You’re writing again?” he uttered after a few moment of silence.

You lifted your head and raised your brows “Ah!” You closed your notebook right away and blinked three times to compose yourself “No. I’m not”

His two eyebrows raised, shoulders shrugged, face etched with tease as if saying ‘Yeah, sure. As if I’d buy that’

As if saved by the bell, your brother and Brian arrived. Not long enough, Wonpil and Sungjin came, too.

Your brother, as usual, is filming for his vlog again. Sometimes, they would even let you hold the camera as if you’re their personal camerawoman. They’re having the topic about ‘missing someone’. Their answers were quite emotional.

Dowoon misses his friends from his old town who were the reasons why he started being interested in bands. Brian misses his best friend in Canada where he stayed for four years to study. Wonpil misses his grandmother while Sungjin misses his grandfather. What surprised you the most is your brother’s answer.

 “Rather than a person… Myself? I think I miss myself from the past”

It was a short statement but it was deep. You never thought your brother had that in him.

As they talked about the past, they brought up Wonpil trying out to be a part of a dance team. Now they’re all prompting him to show his skills.

“Give me a beat”, he told Dowoon confidently.

When he started dancing, Brian and Sungjin immediately left the scene. Jae, slightly leaning back, just stared with a ‘I-dont-know-this-guy’ look painted on his face. After a few moment, he followed Brian and Sungjin in walking away while Dowoon stopped making beats and joined Wonpil.

“Let’s do it together. Let’s do it”

“This is really hard”, Wonpil warned when all he did was just almost like jogging-in-place.

“Let’s just do it”

Being the person behind the camera, you tried so hard to contain your laugh so that your voice won’t be heard.

“Dowoon, come here!” the other boys exclaimed and Wonpil was left dancing alone.

“Why don’t you free yourself?” Dowoon asked one day, trying to break the silence, when it’s just you and him in the studio.

Your forehead furrowed in question “What do you mean?”

“Why do you even cage yourself when you’re supposed to be free?”

“You said you didn’t read it” you deadpanned

“I didn’t. I took a picture” Your eyebrow raised in confusion “When you asked me that time, I really haven’t read it. I just read it few weeks ago”

“Why would you even take a picture?” You scoffed

He just shrugged “You looked so into it when you were writing. As if words flowed nonstop. But then it did after a few moments and seeing you frustrated made me curious.”

He was observing me?

“Free yourself”

“You’re not even sociable yourself”

“But I at least don’t wear a mask. That’s who I am. That’s what I want to show people. And what you see when I’m with your brother and the others, that’s still who I am. If I don’t like people, then I let them know. If I like them, then I act like how I am with the guys”

“Oh, so that’s why you keep glaring at those girls who follow you around and sleep in class because you don’t like them? You don’t like school, too?”

It was evident that he was a bit surprised. “Y-you’re stalking me, aren’t you?” He was trying to tease you but seeing his ears all red amuses you. So instead of trying to defend yourself, you want his plan to backfire.

“That’s right. I’m stalking you”

His eyes widened, taken aback from your statement. If his ears were the only ones that were red earlier, now his neck, too.  You laughed as you’re filled with mirth but that gaiety was replaced with uneasiness when you noticed he wasn’t laughing with you but let his eyes just glued to you. Now it’s your time to turn red.

You cleared your throat to deaden the awkwardness.

“You finally laughed”

Pressing your lips together, you try to even your breathing. Or maybe it’s your heartbeat you’re trying to calm? You just responded with a soft smile.

It’s the first time that you interacted like you’re friends.

“You know how I free myself sometimes?” He asked and you shook your head, unconsciously pouting. He bit his lip and looked down for a second, trying not to let his ears turn red again. He tilted his head pointing at the other side of the room.

Your gaze followed and it landed on a particular instrument. “Drums?”

He nodded. “You wanna try?”

“I-I don—“ before you could decline fully, he stood up and grabbed your wrist.

Thankfully, his back is facing you so he could not see your blush creeping on your cheeks. He grabbed a stool and placed it beside the drums—near the drummer’s seat, enough that you could see his movements.

He introduced every part of the drums. He even labeled them as ‘mother, father, eldest sibling, twins, and cousins’ before introducing their actual names.

“Father is bass and mother is floor tom.” He introduced delightfully and you can’t help but wear a sweet smile “This sibling is snare drums. And the twins are tom-toms. Sometimes they are called high and middle tom or tom one and tom two”

You chuckled and he scratched his head shyly.

“So the rest are cousins. They are the cymbals. This one close to the snare is called hi-hat and the taller one is crash. Then this other one near the floor tom is the ride.”

“What’s the difference between the crash and ride cymbals?”

“Well… Ride is usually the biggest cymbal in a typical beginner drum set. Usually, not always though. And it has a sustained and shimmering sound. Crash, on the other hand, produces loud and sharp sound.”

You nodded “Are you gonna show me a beat now?”

“Yes, I will teach you a basic groove. First let’s start with a quarter note.”

You raised your eyebrow “You mean, one beat in every count?”

“Yes. So it’s just a normal 1, 2, 3, 4 kind of counting. And in every count you should strike the hi-hat. Don’t really force it or push but just a relaxed hit on it, okay?” He then showed a demonstration of it. “Next, let’s put on the bass drum. As you hit the hi-hat in every count, hit the bass drum in one and three. So it’s like bass-two-bass-four. You get it?”

Biting your lip, you nodded slowly. “Yeah, yeah.”

“Alright. Next is the snare. Still hitting the hi-hat in every count and the bass in one and three, add the snare in two and four.”

“Oh, so it’s just like… alternate? Bass-snare-bass-snare and hi-hat is in every count?”

“Yes. Wow. Very good student” You both chuckled “But let’s use the eighth note to get the drumming feels more. So it’s just like the same but to make it easier, let’s count it as 1-and-2-and-3-and-4-and”

“So it’s just like adding ‘and’? So like double the beat in 4 counts, right?”

“Excellent! You’re still going to play the bass in one and three, snare in two and four, and hi-hat in every count including the ‘and’s’”

Dowoon teaching you the basics of drums somehow pulls you to become interested  in it. And it excites you more now that he’s handed you the sticks.

It looks easy but when you actually try to play the groove, it’s not as easy as it seem. “It’s really hard to coordinate them together” you whined after a couple of tries.

Dowoon chortled “Most people really have a hard time in coordinating their hand and foot—the bass with the hi-hat and snare” He smiled “Bass and snare are different. So are your feet and hands. But if they could work together, they’ll produce a very nice beat. You know, like how two people are different, sometimes they’d even hate each other, but when they find a common interest, they could create a great relationship… friendship”

Your gaze were both locked to each other for a good two seconds. He was the one who broke it and cleared his throat. Your eyes settled on his ears again—they’re red.

“L-let me just help you with your groove” he his nape as he positioned himself behind you. He stretched his arms to reach your hands, holding it carefully as he tries to move them with every count. You can feel his breath caressing a small part of your face, your ear and slightly on your neck.

It suddenly felt hot. Was it the steam from his red ears or did you turn red yourself?

You don’t know what beat you’re hearing anymore. Is it the beat of the drums you both make or the beat of your hearts?

When he thought you might be getting uncomfortable, he thought about the position you’re in and became uneasy himself. He let go of your hands and composed himself, his nape again to calm down but his redness isn’t dwindling.

The room feels empty now without the sound of the drums but the sound of your heart beating loud seems to ade the area.

But maybe it wasn’t just your heartbeat you’re hearing—but two hearts beating as one.