You hate it when she cries.

Today at the fansign when a very special fan came up, she and Hyoyeon became very emotional. You were at her side and of course you noticed–the sudden somber mood she exuded, the small jut of her lower lips when she pouted, the quiver of those lips, the swimming pair of those big, doe-eyes.

You noticed everything.

But then again, it's Yoona, your Yoona, and you notice every single thing about her.

So it's not really a surprise when you guessed first hand she would be breaking into tears before the fans in the place could even start wondering.

Your guess was confirmed when one of the bodyguards handed her a tissue. You bended over a little towards her and subtly placed your hand over her knees under the table.

"What's wrong?"

You asked, gentle and soft, like you always do, and you want to think that it's because of this that the dam broke, flooding her flawless cheeks with salty tears.

And, okay, you hate it when she cries, not only because it twists your little, Yoona-loving heart into various, painful knots, but also because you tend to cry with her too and man, Sooyoung's gonna be teasing you throughout the week for being whipped (you're thankful she's not here; hopefully no one tells her or else–)

But you couldn't care less and you cannot ing stop yourself from moistening your eyes when you saw how vulnerable and teary Yoona is.

You cannot because it's Yoona and she should be smiling because dear lord, her smile is one of the prettiest you've seen in your gucci granny life, her smile can cure cancer and heal the world and goddammit, you hate it when she cries.

She quietly shook her head in response to your soft inquiry, tried to give you a small smile of reassurance that she's okay and everything is fine. She even tried to laugh through her tears but the more those stupid eye waters would drop from her pair of brown.

You saw Hyoyeon dabbing her eyes with tissue now too and in your peripheral view, you noticed the fan across Yoona with the same fond, and blissful tears.

A jolt of understanding suddenly filled your confused state when a pang of a very little but noticeable recognition came upon you.

You've seen this woman, a lady in late twenties, a couple or more times (maybe even more, you will never know) from past fansigns, events, music shows and concerts. She's a familiar figure and the moist in your eyes intensifies when the lady, finally came standing across you, smiled through her tears, just like your Yoona, and shyly said,

"I've been an avid fan since 2007. I've seen you guys grow on TV while I see myself grow in front of the mirror.."

You found yourself shedding tears in that instant. You turned to see Yoona trying to lighten up the mood by cracking silly jokes with the bodyguards and with Hyoyeon and with the new fan across her. She was trying to brush off the rush of emotions that kicked in just a while ago and tried to wipe them away with a teary smile because she's Yoona, your Yoona who has the prettiest smile and the prettiest heart.

But you, Kwon Yuri, cannot, for the life of you, do just as much because suddenly, the realization of how far you've come as a group and as individual artist puts you in a little coma.

A coma of cloud nine and unicorns and confettis and yesteryear memories of struggles and wins and mistakes and achievements.

It's been a GOOD ING TEN YEARS of Girls' Generation and here you are, Kwon Yuri, with your loyal sisters and loyal fans and your loving girl right beside you.

What is there not to cry at??

You looked at the lovely fan in front of you and she's smiling down at you, looking like a proud parent who finally achieved her goal in life: which is raising South Korea's National Girl Group from dust to this HUGE wall that it is now.

You wonder if this is exactly what your Yoona felt. If she felt a suffocating mixture of feelings, or the bittersweet taste of success and mishaps at the tip of the tongue, or the flow of Sones and their undying love and support in your veins.

You wonder had you ever thought of chickening out on the SM auditions a decade ago, if your life would be this fulfilling and happy.

(At the back of your mind you strongly disagree because you believe that getting into a group of nine 120 months ago was the second best decision you've made in your life.

Loving Im Yoona is definitely the first)

"Thank you so much.." You whispered, "..this means a lot to me, to us..thank you for staying with us until this point of time.." not trusting your voice at the moment, afraid it'll crack the same way your eyes are cracking more tears.

The fan timidly rambled about her early Sone syndrome and all the extent she had to go through just to see you and the girls. Even after all these years, it warmed your heart to know that there are people who would move mountains just to get a glimpse of you and the members and this thought is enough encouragement for your eyes to produce more sweat.

Apparently, the fan had to go (after annoying persistence from your manager and the bodyguards) and you have to give her a bittersweet smile and a squeeze on her hand before letting her leave. You sighed, deeply at it, as you see her go her way and you wonder when will be the next time you'll meet her again.

Before you know it, you're trying the hell out of your lean body to duck under the table and hide away from all the cameras pointed at you. Suddenly, you feel bare and conscious for crying in front of your fans and you just want to get away.

It's not like you've never cried in front of them, because you did, alot actually (you're probably the biggest crybaby in the group).

It's just that this thing you're feeling is a whole new level of emotional. It feels like the of everything that happened for the past ten years and it's only then that it dawned on you how life-changing it is to be Girls' Generation, to meet fans and people who love you, to meet sisters who will always be there when you need 'em..

..to meet that one person that locked your heart up with hers and say the most stupid things and you'll still love her nonetheless.

God, you hate it when Yoona cries.

You hate it because it's Yoona, and Yoona has this effect on you that whatever it is that she feels, you feel it too, like 10x greater than what she feels cause like, that's how great you "love her the mostest" everytime you two argue who loves who the most.

And now, you feel like the Niagara Falls has been moved to your pair of eyes and is about to flood the whole area, drowning the members and your managers and the fans and everything and oh my god what are you even thinking???

ing hell.

This is why you hate it when she cries.

***

Later that night, the rest of you girls were in the company van, driving all of you to a cozy diner that Hyoyeon spent zero seconds to make everyone agree.

(She never asks; she tells)

Of course, the rest of you never gets to say on this because it's Hyoyeon, and none amongst you six wants to get in an argument with her regarding the matter cause like, Sooyoung's not here to oppose everything that Hyoyeon says like she usually does and it's Hyoyeon and it's as simple as that.

Or maybe you actually did want to raise an objection because you're stomach is craving for seafood and you wanted to try that newly opened resto you've seen in your insta feed once.

But you did not because before you could even open your mouth, Yoona was already dragging your back to the van, interlacing her fingers with you as she leads both of you to the confines of the sweet ride, muttering "anywhere's fine with me so long as I'll be fed nicely" or something like that.

So yeah, that explains your current position.

In the back of the car, with Yoona's head on your chest and your arm draped across her shoulders and her strawberry-scented hair under your nose and with her slender fingers fumbling with your own and god, could this be even more perfect?

(You silently wish the driver would just slow it down or a traffic will come up on the next few intersections the van had to pass through just to make this moment a little while longer.

Yeah..you're that hopeless romantic)

"Are you okay?"

You suddenly broke the comfortable silence between the two of you, wanting to ask the question since what transpired in the fansign hours ago.

She knows you hated seeing her cry and she knows it triggers something in you to see her in a state like that.

Yoona knows, she perfectly knows, so you never have to repeat your question twice because she lifts her head from your chest to see you eye to eye and answer,

"Yes. I am okay.." She started playing with your fingers again with one hand and tucked a strand of your fringe behind your ear with the other when she added, "I'm fine, Yul. Don't worry.."

"Are you sure?"

You can't help but ask again and find reassurance in her words cause like, she can be secretive of what she's feeling sometimes and you just never want her to be alone when something is bothering her.

"Well.." She started, looking down at your entwined hands and finding interest on the invisible mole on your palm, "I'm not sure about a lot of things being okay.." She peeked through her long lashes and you can see a ghost of smile on her pair of lips when she, smoothly as ever, finished, "I'm sure about being okay with you though."

You smiled. The kind of soft smile that reached your eyes and you just..with this girl..you can't even..ugh.

"Can you not?"

She giggled. An actual giggle from Im Yoona herself and you had to bite your inner cheek to remind you that you're not dead and you're not in heaven.

(Though Yoona is just as much of an angel so it's close enough)

"Whaaat?"

"You know what I'm talking about, you silly.." You softly pinched her nose because why not and the way she scrunched it with a pout of those lips you love made your grin wider and fuller, "Tell me something I don't know."

Yoona bit her lip to think for a moment before shrugging, easy and comfortable gaze staring back at you.

"I dunno. It's just like all the feels came rushing, unnie" She started speaking full of innocence and vulnerability and you can imagine the same look she had at the fansign prior, "Like there was a streak of flashback that played in the back of my mind when I met that girl. I felt so fulfilled and happy and nostalgic and everything at the same time. It was insane feeling, unnie, I swear.."

You smiled at her child-like ramble and you thought, yes, this is how exactly what you wanted her to do, to speak with you with everything and anything because you will always be there for her to listen to her rants on just about anything.

She must know that you care about her feelings and thoughts and you're glad she seems to trust you with all these intangible emotions that people can't normally describe.

"I do not want to cry infront of all of them because I don't wanna spoil the mood or something, y'know. But I can't help it. It was overwhelming. I'm sorry"

You leaned over to press a peck on her forehead before looking at her with a blush of seriousness in your tone, "Do not say sorry. We feel a myriad emotions every now and then and we can't help but feel that way. Your feelings are valid, my love.."

She rewarded you with her signature megawatt smile and man, that precious and its effect on you are never getting old.

"God, I don't deserve you.."

You giggled and shook your head. You giggled because it's funny that Yoona thinks she doesn't deserve you when it's the other way around and you shook your head because NAWW,Yoona deserves everything.

Even if it is the lowly peasant that is you, Kwon Yuri, if Yoona wills, you'll be hers (you are hers no matter what anyways. It's not like you would give her an option or something)

"The world doesn't deserve you, Yoong.." You replied, "It's you I don't deserve."

The two of you stared and stared and stared and you wondered how you aren't dead when you've been drowning in those pools of brown and doe-eyes and everything Im Yoona.

"Stop it, y'all. I'm getting diabetes just hearing all of your sickenly sweet love confessions" You hear Hyoyeon's sudden comment and you have to blink a couple of times to get your senses back from the limbo that you came from, "I haven't even had my meal yet. Why am I getting dessert this early?"

The van erupted into laughter and this made you roll your eyes because yeah, leave it to your members to ruin a perfectly romantic moment between you and your girl.

Quite the friends, actually.

"Shut up, Hyo.."

Yoona was cackling with the members when you turned to look at her and, haigoooo, you can only shake your head at their dorkiness.

"What about you?" Yoona asked all of a sudden.

You raised your perfectly penciled brow, "What about me?"

"You cried with us and Hyo unnie after you saw the fan. Aren't you an emotional puppy" She teased you with a playful twinkle on her eyes and you scoffed at the absurdity of her statement.

"I am not a puppy," you huffed, "And you're the one to talk. If I remember clearly you're the first one to break into tears, I'm surprised you even noticed my messy state through your tears.

Yoona looked at you in amusement, "Of course I noticed. I will never not notice," almost in disbelief at what you said, "I always notice every single thing about you, Yul, even if you think I don't.."

You good-humoredly rolled your eyes at her random cheesy line before she added,"And I mean, anyone with eyes would have noticed too. You're not really a subtle person whenever you cry babe, even if you insist that you are."

"Huh.." You pouted,"I do tried to be subtle though. I mean, I thought the table did me justice. I practically shoved myself down in order to hide away from cameras."

"Puh-lease.." You heard Yoona snort beside you,"The table will never ever do you justice, Kwon Yuri."

Did she just–

"OH MY GOD IM YOONA YOU ERT!!"

Another wave of boisterous laughter and hoots erupted from the rest of the members who are obviously listening to your conversation with your girl. Your cheeks flushed pink even more when you hear Tiffany yelling something in English that sounded like, "You get it girl!" and you don't understand it but you perfectly know it's not something favorable to your fine, embarrassed piece of and like, yeah, you're a loser.

"What?" She breathed out a grin, "You don't believe me? I can prove it to you if you want.."

She had to wiggle her eyebrows to emphasize the meaning behind her words and you had to roll your eyes for the millionth time at how flirty your girl was trying to be (which is more of adorable than y)

"You're such an idiot, you know that right? God, why am I dating you again?"

Yoona smirked, the kind of smirk that makes your wet and lips dry, and you could have seen it coming when she said,

"Because I'm your idiot and you're mine."

You didn't.

You didn't see it coming and you swear you've never smiled this much in your life it was starting to hurt your face all over; but you didn't mind.

You didn't mind because it's Yoona who caused this painful grin on your lips and Yoona can do anything with you and you will never learn to mind cause like, it's Yoona, and you never mind everything when it comes to her so.

"Yeah...I'm yours."

So you just agreed because there's no denying that she is yours and you are hers.

It's a universal fact and the answer to the world's poverty (and okay maybe that's too political and exaggerating but whatever, you know what it means)

It's Yoon to the Yul and nothing made more sense than your names being put together and it's freaking fitting.

Fitting just like how your lips fits to be placed somewhere on her face. So you pulled her back into you and you pressed your lips on her nose then onto her forehead, lingering your kiss for a while and then finally to your favorite pair of lips.

The kiss was searing and full and you found yourself pulling her in for more, tangling your fingers with her hair and Yoona tilting her head, giving you better access to all of her as she snakes her arms around your waist.

She tasted like mint and your favorite flavor of coffee and sugar and spice and everything nice and ugh, you can't even feel your aching ankle anymore, forgetting that you've painfully injured them with the way Yoona's lips kissed the pain away.

You, Kwon Yuri, cannot get enough so you pull her some more and more and more until you're sure there's no more space between the two of you.

This, you think, is the best way to die. In Yoona's arms with Yoona lips and under Yoona's warmth.

(And with diabetes too since you yourself acknowledges the fact that everything about your relationship screams GAY GAY GAY GAY and rainbows and unicorns and sugar and okay you should stop)

You both smiled between your kisses when you hear yet another set of cheerings and hoots from the members. You swear those girls are idiots but you love them so much from the bottom of your heart.

You love them so so much you just flipped them off by giving them the finger, earning a loud gasp (you believe it was from Seohyun since there was a shriek of 'Unnieee!!") and a series of laughing and cheers from the rest (even noticing Taeyeon doubling over from too much cackling)

Knowing it would be useless to continue with your heated make out session with the girls' prying eyes around, you and Yoona had a silent agreement to just end the entertaining show they were getting and pecked each other's lips for the last time before finally pulling away with the brightest smiles on your faces.

Humming happily, she snuggled back into your arms with her head against your chest just like before and there's no place you'd rather be.

You're content and happy and so you pressed your nose back to where they were before and the addicting scent of her shampoo overwhelms you in a good way (but then again there's nothing that isn't good about Yoona) that you cannot stop yourself from sighing more in contentment.

You're content and happy and Yoona's here in your arms, fine and healthy and yours, and there's nothing more that you could wish for.

Except maybe for a ing lightning to hit SM and a ing diarrhea to drain the hell out of whoever idiot proposed the cutting of your 10th-year album promotions into one week and sabotage all you girls hardwork and Sones' waiting heart (and pockets)

Yeah.. That would be ing fantastic.

A/N:

Hi y'all. So...I'm not dead.

But I might as well be if the drama and disrespect Soshi is getting in their recent CB and the rush of sad news about them will continue to get worse. My Sone heart is sobbing for the girls. THEY DO NOT DESERVE EVERY SINGLE BULL IN THEIR CAREER RN. THEY DO NOT.

*deep breath*

Anyway, I came to drop this as my own, little way of showing my resistance and OUTRAGE about what is going on with SNSD drama and to let you all know that I have not disappeared from the face of the earth as yet.

I am truly sorry to the readers of my full-blown fics for the long hiatus. Hopefully, I can make time to make things back on track but rest assured that I ain't abandoning them anytime soon.

Anyone who has Twitter? Talk to me here @sleepylashes, loves. It gets lonely there without a Sone to make 'chismis' with especially with all that's going on. Let's hate SM together and plan a revenge plot consisting of rainbow spears and unicorn horns.

PS: How are you enjoying the new writing style btw? Hope it didn't taste foul in your mouths, babes.

Write me something below :)