"Snowy land reminds me of purest dreams. "

The man stared out of the window of the old coffee shop for more than half an hour on his usual spot, or maybe a special seat that had been reserved for him every year on this particular day. His hot chocolate was left untouched on the table after taking a sip of it twenty minutes ago. The old man that served him the drink could not say anything but to watch in sympathy. For others, there was nothing interesting outside, just white land of snow and lonely sight of empty bench under a pine tree. For him, the view was more than just cold lonely night. It was a first encounter of two innocent children, a warm embrace that awaited for spring, and unexpected farewell that hoped for a reunion. 

His memories wandered to years back where the two kids were awkwardly apologizing for bumping into one another. The little girl slowly stood up from the snowy ground and brushed of the white snow while the other boy was embarrassed by the whole situation. Oh, that was bad! His mommy told him to go home early and do not cause any trouble like what he did earlier in grandpa's house. He broke grandpa's favourite mug and the old man was not too happy about it. Then, he decided to play in the snow without noticing the time had ticked to five in the afternoon.

Oh dear, he made grandpa and mommy upset that day, he did not want to bring another person down, especially a stranger.

The little girl noticed the guilt spread on the boy's face and oh no, was he crying? The girl rushed towards the little boy and patted his head. "Hey, don't cry! I'm okay, no hurty at all! " She shook her hands in the air to show no injury but the boy kept sniffling while mumbling 'sorry' for who knew how many times that day. Knowing the person in front of her would not stop crying even if she begged him to, the little girl dragged the poor boy to a coffee shop across the street. 

Upon entering the coffee shop, the aroma of coffee beans hit their nose. 
"Ah sweetie, you're back! Is that your friend? " The man at the counter greeted the children and looked at the crying boy. The little boy felt a little shy and scooted closer to the girl.
"Appa, I don't know him but he's crying. Can we have that one? " The little girl pointed to the customers' order, making her father chuckled a bit. "Oh right honey, two hot chocolates right up! " 

The little girl sat opposite to the boy while looking outside the window before pulling her gaze away to look at the crying mess in front of her. "What's your name? " 
The little boy tried to calm down and said his name properly through the constant sniffling. "Jonghyun.. " Ah, he was so shy. It was his first time going to a shop like this without his parents and the one who accompanied him was a girl. 
'What did they call it in drama? Tate, date, gate?' Small Jonghyun thought really hard for the right word until the girl spoke again. "Jonghyun is a nice name! My name is (y/n)" She grinned at him, making him feel comfortable. 

"Alright, two hot chocolates and cookies! " (Y/n)'s father brought the tray of food to the children as the little girl giggled in delight. "Jonghyun-ah, drink it! It is my favourite. My appa always make it when I'm sad. " She said as she pushed the mug closer to the little boy. "Can I? I don't have any money.." Jonghyun hesitated while looking down at the mug. Little (y/n) just shook her head and cut him off. "It's okay, this is appa's shop and you're my new friend." She once again gestured to ask Jonghyun to take a sip. And Jonghyun did it. Little (y/n) smiled in accomplishment and shoot him with tonnes of questions. "Is it delicious? Did it taste good? Are you okay? " Jonghyun looked at her for awhile and erupted in small laughter. "Ah, you finally smiled" (Y/n) sat back to her seat and drank her own hot chocolate. Maybe, little Jonghyun likes to be friend with her. 

As time went by, the two of them got closer and they practically hung out together all the time. "Yah, the Biology teacher is crazy for giving us works we don't even understand. " (Y/n) whined as she cleaned the table in the coffee shop with a torn rag. Both of them often helped out in the shop when they had free time. "Well, I think it's fine though? " Jonghyun replied as he arranged the mugs orderly on the wood shelves. (Y/n) was unhappy with the reply and pouted. "It's not. " When Jonghyun was thinking about something to reply, someone just interrupted their conversation from the back of the shop. "Hey young lovers! Please spare this old man as he could not handle such sweet gooey lovers' quarrels." (Y/n)'s father laughed aloud after he finished his 'old man's speech'. Both Jonghyun and (y/n) could feel blush creeping to their faces and that was the first time they realised the butterflies in their stomachs and feelings towards one another. 
"Appa, we're not lovers or something 'gooey'. " She whined at her father's words while Jonghyun could only turned his back and tried to fan his burning face.  Maybe, Jonghyun wanted that to happen. 

After they graduated, (y/n) was rarely to be seen. Even if Jonghyun asked her father about it, he could only see the sorrowful eyes behind that forced smile of the old man. What happened to her? Although she sent letters once in awhile, she never told Jonghyun where she was or what she had been up to, even if Jonghyun asked about it in every letters.

 He felt uneasy. He missed her so much. He missed her smile that lightened his whole day, the way she talked that made Jonghyun swooned over her or the way she pouted every time she spilled her hot chocolate. He missed her so much that he thought he was going crazy. He kept all of the letters and read it from time to time which only made him feel more regretful. He should have stop her from leaving. 

Or, he should have told her that he loves her. 

As the yearly festive season was around the corner, Jonghyun held up hopes that maybe, his love would come back and he might able to tell her. But it seemed like the whole world was against him as an odd letter reached him. 

"Dear Jonghyun, 
I know I've been writing a lot lately, especially this month. I know you might feel weird that this letter came out of nowhere. Now.. where do I start? The first time I met you, you cried so much that I panicked that maybe I made you upset. But it turned out, hot chocolate is the cure after all. Then, in middle school. Remember when I got braces and slightly overweight? Yes, I got bullied but you were there to keep me safe and comfort me. You helped me go through everything and reminded me to keep myself healthy as I always starved myself due to insecurities. But seriously, I freaked out when you punched that one guy in the face. 

Next, in high school. Remember when appa teased us for being 'lovey-dovey' even though we're not lovers? Ah, this is embarrassing but I did secretly hope, that we are together. "

Jonghyun got even uncomfortable when he read the letter halfway. "Why is she saying this now? " And the letter was unexpectedly long. Without wasting the time, he continued to read his letter. 

"I'm sorry for not telling you everything. I'm sorry I can't be there for you. I really wish to see you again, but I couldn't as my condition... Well, something bad happened. I told appa to not tell you about this.. Sorry. 
I've been wanting to tell you this, but I don't want to make you sad. I hate it when I made you upset. So please smile often, for me? Ah, I'm so bad with my words.. 
But hey Jonghyun, will you remember me? I know this is a weird question. I just.. I missed you so much. I'm getting tired... 

I love you, Jonghyun. 
Let's meet again in another Christmas. "

The handwriting was getting messier at the end of the letter and the text was a little blurry. Was she crying while writing this? 

Jonghyun could not do anything but stared at the letter before him. He held his pounding head before letting out sobs that he tried to contained. But he could not. He did not understand why it had to be happened that way. He just wanted to hug (y/n) and tell her how much he loves her. But she left. She left him crying in the cold season. The old man could only pat his shoulder in attempt to comfort Jonghyun. After a few tries, the old man felt his eyes getting blurry with his own tears. 

It had been two years, Jonghyun still came to the coffee shop to help out. And every Christmas, he sat on the very spot of the first day they met. 
The same beverage every year. Hot chocolate, her favourite. How could he forget that? 

"(Y/n), let's meet in another Christmas."