"update will be soon (i swear!)"

-10 months later-

*updates*

Wonderful. Bravo.

all jokes aside.

Hi stan dreamcatcher. Anyway, hi again. 

This is from jinglebellselu round 1 so basically 2016.

I'm just cleaning up folders and updating stuffs that were meant to be updated liek months ago (check this chanlu out) *bricked*

and without further ado. This is edited. Enjoy.

For some reason, he was looking more frustrated than ever. Luhan wasn’t even sure what it was about. It was worrying.

“Is something bothering you? You can always tell me”

He stared in Luhan’s eyes for a long time to be considered normal yet Luhan found himself gazing right back, not breaking the contact. He had a feeling that that the conversation was not something they would usually have. It was truly bothering him and Luhan’s desire to find what the problem was seemed to deepen.

The reply was vague and it perplexed Luhan, so he aimed to inquire more “what do you mean?”

Sehun, his best friend for four years, only gave out a sigh. A small smile on his face as he answered “it’s nothing, don’t mind me”

It was certainly not nothing, Luhan could tell. He was also certain that the smile shown was supposed to reassure him, yet Luhan found it unconvincing.

“I’m getting hungry, we better move!” Sehun spoke in an almost whining voice. It might be an attempt at distraction, but Luhan wasn’t falling for it.

That is until Sehun walked ahead, leaving him behind. He sighed, he knew the conversation was over.

“wait up!” he cried out as he jogged after his best friend.

“How come you’ve never looked my way, Han?”

==

The first time they met was a cold almost winter afternoon. The autumn season was nearing its end, and the weather was gradually changing. Luhan and a few of his friends had just finished their classes.

They were chatting animatedly in their mother tongue and was walking along the hallways of their university.

It was then that Luhan spotted him. He was right there, idly standing by the side, seemingly waiting for someone or something.

Luhan noticed him in an instant, if asked why he would retort back a ‘who wouldn’t?’. This guy was attractive indeed with his tall stature, long hair and dark brown fringes framing his handsome face. If Luhan didn’t know any better, he would say this guy would most probably be a part time model.

So Luhan couldn’t really blame himself when he dumbly spoke out loud “Oh wow, hot” which still was a safe zone for him because he spoke in his mother tongue. This attractive Korean guy, without a doubt, would not understand any word of it.

And apparently, he wasn’t the only one finding him good-looking. His friends also voiced out their agreements. But undeniably, Luhan was friends with people whose as foolish as he was so it was not a surprise when they started to make fun of him.

That’s what friends are for, as they say

“Look! It’s your boyfriend!” his friend had said. His other friend snickered and started shamelessly calling out to the attractive guy, still speaking in mandarin. “Hey! Luhan’s boyfriend!”

It was no secret between his friends nor his family about his preference. The signs were there and it took him a long time to accept the fact that he likes the same gender. And it took another long time to just go ‘ this’ and finally reveal it to his family and friends after building enough courage.

Luhan was immediate to shut them up by hitting their arms, embarrassed for calling out unnecessary attention. ‘Ah. The burden of having embarrassing friends.’ He thought.

“Stop that!” Luhan hissed, eyes flickering to one spot. He felt a bit alarmed when the guy was looking at their direction, he turned his head back to his friends in record time “I know he’s hot but c’mon. That’s so out of my league, man” then he leaned in and whispered “and he’s probably straight.”

His friends snickered once more, and Luhan threatened to hit them again. He gave another glance at the guy and it made Luhan awkward when they made eye contact. The guy seemed to look offended, or it may just be his perfectly (in Luhan’s opinion. He appreciates every God’s creations) shaped brows.

Either way, it was afterall, rude to talk about someone in another language especially when they were all too obvious and the person they were talking about was literally a few steps away from them.

Luhan can only give a polite smile when they passed by him as he tugged his friends’ elbows, dragging them to leave.

Reminiscing that event once more, Luhan concluded that their first meeting was not that interesting.

Correction.

He drilled inside his mind that it was not interesting to look back into, because it was freaking embarrassing.

Meeting Sehun was one of those memories he wanted to bury, along with those memories where he considered as his dark past and should never ever resurface because the embarrassment was enough for him to jump over the next bridge he’d see.

==

Christmas season was coming again, another year that is nearing its end, yet it is a time where Luhan felt the loneliest. After Valentines, that is. (and he could also argue with the loneliest part, because technically he spends it with his family, cats, best friend and friends).

He would once again sense this strange feeling of envy whenever he’d see couple walking down the streets, park, malls, in front of his house (the nerve), or just everywhere. It was like they were purposely making Luhan feel how single he was (coughs, no lover since birth, coughs, never been kissed, coughs, still a virg– COUGHS).

“do you think I would receive my first kiss this year?” he heard himself say. It was always the same question whenever the Christmas season neared. It might be because of the sudden emergence of happy couples everywhere that made him wonder.

And of course, that exact question always had the same answer.

“do you really want to hear my reply?” his best friend asked back. Sometimes his best friend would ask question like these, other times, he would flatly answer. He snorted when Sehun decided to beat around the bush this time, so Luhan countered instead “Nahh, we both know the answer anyways”

“maybe you’ll like my answer this time”

“I probably won’t” Luhan insisted. He was already pitying himself, and saying it aloud would make him feel more pitiful, not to mention, down.

Sehun gave a small shrug “suit yourself”

“whatever” Luhan muttered, picking up his phone once more, scrolling through the contact list and pressing the call button beside Seven’s name from Mystic Messenger.

“You’re still playing that gam–”

“shh” Luhan was quick to silence him, anticipating Seven’s voice, however the fictional character didn’t pick up and instead was all speaking in his cutesy voice telling him he was busy.

He sighed, putting the phone down “At least I have a boyfriend for eleven days or girlfriend, in Jaehee’s case”

It was Sehun who snorted this time, not even asking who the heck Seven or Jaehee was because Luhan had fanboyed about them almost every chance he get. “well. If you badly want a boyfriend, say no more because I have a solution.”

Raising a brow, he asked curiously “and that is?”

Luhan expected Sehun to say something funny like he usually would whenever the former’s mood would spiral down and he was not disappointed when the latter proudly puffed his chest, confidently declaring “Me.”

Luhan’s response was quick as he laughed out loud “are you kidding me? Heck no! Haha!” apparently, he found it funny. He appreciated the effort though.

Thanks to his best friend he felt a little better. “whatever Sehun, nice try. Thanks for making me laugh, anyways”

There was a brief look on the younger’s face but it was quick to change when he let out a smile and ruffled Luhan’s hair. Which of course, he swatted away because his best friend’s fingers where getting stuck on his locks and it was getting a bit painful (he hadn’t shampooed in two days). He only smiled sheepishly when Sehun gave him and his own hand a confused look.

Standing up and stretching for a bit to loosen his joints and relax his muscles, Luhan gave out a long sigh, satisfied with the clicks he heard.

It’s been years. He hadn’t even known the true feeling of falling for someone, his only experience were from the fairy tale stories he’d read and watched when he was a kid (it levelled up to mangas, manhwas, fanfictions and animes as he grew).

It was silent for a few seconds before Luhan muttered “maybe it’s time to look for my Prince myself, don’t you think so?” a small smile graced his lips, thinking at the prospect of finally sharing his first kiss (cuz mommy and daddy kisses doesn’t count!) with someone who he could call a lover.

Maybe it was really the time to stop sitting around, waiting for his Prince Charming to sweep his off the floor, although Luhan was fairly aware, that was not how the saying goes.

“No.”

Luhan’s smile fell right away, whipping his head quickly to look at his best friend, bewildered “excuse me??” had he hear him right?

“It’s an absolute no”

He did hear him right. Luhan stared dumbly for a second before he could find himself to speak “wait. What? Why?” he stepped closer to the taller, not at all taunted by the height difference as he grabbed the side of his best friend’s arms, demanding “whyyyyy??”

“I don’t think it’s a good idea”

There was a brief moment of silence where one would think someone pressed the mute button as both of them gazed at each other’s eyes.

Luhan broke it “…you..” he started, pulling back in disbelief, repeating “you don’t think it’s a good idea?”

Sehun gave a nod, Luhan was quick to answer “okay, that is definitely a very supportive reasoning.” He sarcastically said, with eyes narrowing a little.

“you aren’t capable. I know how you flirt, Han”

Luhan’s eyes widen in bewilderment as Sehun continued “you stare at someone from afar”

“Oh my god, Sehun!” because it was actually true, and hearing his best friend, who knows a lot about him, say it out loud was mortifying. “w-what’s wrong with that!?” he asked, trying a last attempt to save whatever pride he have left.

However, Sehun ignored him as he flatly continued “and you always chicken out by the last minute whenever you tell me that you would approach some person. Or you would completely shut up, like a mute whenever someone you like approaches you.”

Luhan’s lips sealed tight, unable to think of a good comeback as he let Sehun recite his failed attempts of flirting. It was all true, and he was embarrassed more and more. How dare this Oh Sehun humiliate him.

“you should just spend your Christmas with me, just like old times.”

He glared. “Go to hell.” he paused, watching Sehun raise a brow with a smirk on his face.

There were days where Sehun acts annoying (sometimes clingy too) and unfortunately it was one of those days. Knowing him, he would probably sprout nonsense like ‘I will, if you come with me’ Luhan’s eye twiched “No, wait. You know what? this is actually riling me up”

Gears started turning inside his mind, Luhan always believed that was the type of person who would think before he would act.

Though in reality, he does not give himself sufficient time to think long enough and would somehow, always act recklessly. It was one of his shortcomings. “how about this”

Obviously, he was not considering things long and hard enough again when he said the next words.

“I will definitely prove you wrong this year. I am getting a boyfriend and once I do, I will have my first kiss under the mistletoe. And that very same mistletoe will be thrown in your face and I’ll say I told you so.” Was his snarky proclamation.

He received a raised brow and amused look in return “I bet you won’t”

“I bet ya, I will” Luhan replied, finality in his voice. Sehun gazed at him for a while, knowing him, he must probably be thinking of something that would benefit him. There was a catch, Luhan presumed.

“Then, If you lose, you’ll buy me that recently released Final Fantasy XV”

Luhan gave out a snort after hearing the condition. It was not at all bad, in fact, none of this whole ordeal were. It was a safe bet, Luhan concluded “Deal” well except for his crying wallet, maybe.

Because the gravity of his words seemed to be sinking slowly at that moment. He should not lose at any cost! “If I win, you buy it for me.”

“I’ll even give you that mistletoe kiss you’ve always wanted, if you win. Because we both know that you wouldn’t” Sehun confidently announced.

The certainty in his voice made Luhan’s blood boil. He was undeniably making fun of him. “No thanks for that kiss. My Prince will give it to me anyways because I will win this damn bet.” He snapped “Just watch me, Oh Sehun. Watch me.”

“I’m always watching you Han,” he replied, raising a finger close to Luhan’s forehead, and Luhan in reflex, closed his eyes as he waited for the pain.

It was light and there was no pain at all.

“always.”

==