"Okay, okay. I understand. Just call me..." Minseok paused. Later? Tomorrow? Next week? Next month? Or when you finally have time? When you finally need me? When you finally remember to call? 

He badly wanted to ask those things because he knew it will really take a long time before they can talk again. He was busy and Luhan was busier.

Minseok didn't want that call to end since it was the first time they talk for the past two weeks.  After three weeks, Luhan finally had time to call him. He was so happy to finally hear Luhan's voice but the moment the latter uttered his greetings someone was already calling him on the background.

"Hey Minseok-ah! I'm sorry but I have to go, there's just a problem with the shoot so we have to do it again. I'm sorry. I miss you. I'll just call you again when we're done." Those were Luhan's exact words. He can even hear the urgency on Luhan's voice so even if he wanted to protest he just agreed besides what can he do when they were an ocean apart.

"Minseok?" Luhan asked after a while, curious why the older stopped talking. "Are you still there?" 

"Ah yeah, yeah. I'm still here, just ... just call me when you can, Luhan." Minseok said, choosing not to put his thoughts in words. "Bye."

"Okay. I love you. Talk to you later," Luhan said and ended the call. 

Minseok threw his phone on his bed and tiredly slumped his body on his couch. He just wanted to sleep, take a rest and forget the world. He was tired — physically and emotionally. Everything is taking a toll on him. EXO had been busy because of their concert tour while preparing for their upcoming comeback and he also had solo activities that he had to do. 

He sighed and covered his eyes with his arms. 

He knew that Luhan won't call when he finished his shoot. He knew that he won't even call tomorrow or the day after tomorrow because Luhan was so busy. He knew that "later" means next week or next month or whenever the younger find time from his very hectic schedule so Minseok chose not to assume so much. 

And he was right, because when the morning came there is no missed call from Luhan, not even a text message. 

Minseok just sighed and tried not to think about it too much. It's not as if it was the first time that those kind of things happened. It frequently happen especially when Luhan started his own concert so he was now used to it.

He stopped expecting anything from Luhan anyway.

"Sorry if this late, happy anniversary babe. Love you." Minseok immediately checked the date after reading Luhan's message. It was June 24 already. The message was sent 10 minutes before midnight and Minseok just it while he was having a breakfast. 

He cursed. Yesterday was their 5th anniversary and Minseok forgot. He hastily typed a reply saying how sorry he was that he forgot it and yesterday was so hectic so he didn't even bother to check the date.

He was so nervous how Luhan would respond but he never did, maybe the younger is busy today.

June 23.

How can he forgot?

"Hyung, someone's calling you. Your phone had been ringing non-stop," Kyungsoo said with a slight hint of teasing on his voice when Minseok walked pass him on their living room. He just finished taking a bath and he left his phone on his room. 

He thanked Kyungsoo and told him to rest already since it was really late and they still have an early schedule later.

Minseok was confused, though. Who would call him at 1 o'clock in the morning? Is it his mother? Did something bad happen to her? Or to any of their relatives? He shook that thought out of his head, based on Kyungsoo's voice that was not case.

And he was surprised when he saw the caller's name on the screen of his phone.

Luhan.

He stared at his phone in surprise. Why would Luhan call him at this hour? Did something bad happen to him? 

At that thought, Minseok immediately answered the call.

"You called." Minseok sputtered, still surprise about Luhan's surprise call. "I mean, why did you call at this hour? Did something bad happen to you?"

After a month, why did you call now? He wanted to asked badly.

"Hey, hey. I'm okay," Luhan laughed on the other line. That hearty laugh that Minseok loves so much.

And Minseok was caught offguard. He almost forgot that sound, that laugh. That contagious laugh that he always looked forward to hear. That laugh that may sound weird but really a melody in his ears. And Minseok can't believe himself that he's hearing it again.

He thought of the time he last heard that laugh and he was so surprised to found himself not remembering it. His past phone calls with Luhan either didn't even last a minute or would be them just fighting and end up hanging with each other.

"Am I not allowed to call my boyfriend when I miss him?" Luhan said and even though Minseok can't see him he knew that the younger was pouting from the other line.

My boyfriend. It was the first time Luhan had referred him as his boyfriend after a long time and Minseok can't help but blushed. It had been so long that the feeling became foreign to him. It felt strange yet so endearing. 

Minseok remained quite as he processed everything that was going on. 

"Hey Minseok? You're not asleep, are you? Did I disturb you?" Luhan asked, slowly becoming anxious from the silence that he received from the older.

Minseok snapped out of his thoughts when he heard the uncertainty on the caller's voice. 

"I'm awake, Lu. I'm just surprised about your call, I'm sorry," Minseok quickly said, he can hear Luhan's sigh from the other line. 

"I'm sorry I just called. It's just that we were so busy because of my second tour and all these shoots and variety shows." Luhan explained and Minseok already knew that. He knew how crazy Luhan's schedule is.

"I'm sorry if I haven't called you again the last time too, the photoshoot went longer than I expected and I am also sorry for not being able to call you on our anniversary. I knew I should have called," He added, guilt and remorse evident in his voice.

"It's okay, Luhan. I know that you're busy. I know that there's a lot of things going on for you, I understand," Minseok said, voice soothing and soft. He did understand. And of course he was also guilty for forgetting their anniversary.

"No need to be sorry, just take care of yourself. Don't overwork yourself, please."

Minseok was genuinely worried. Luhan seemed to be restless these days.

When Luhan told him that he was leaving the group, Minseok let him. He never tried to stop the latter because he knew all the things Luhan went through. He knew how hard it was for Luhan. And he cannot bear to see his boyfriend struggling and hurting. So eventhough it pained him to see Luhan leave, he endured. But now, seeing Luhan tired and restless as before, he couldn't help but thought if letting him leave was the right decision.

"I won't, don't worry Minseok-ah." Luhan tried to reassure him. "Thank you for always understanding me." And they both knew that Luhan really meant it. He was really thankful to have Minseok in his life, he's really thankful that Minseok is still in his life. In fact, there were moments where Luhan think that he didn't deserve Minseok and that the latter would eventually end things with him. And those moments always put Luhan on edge.

The thought of having a life without Minseok crushed him. The thought of knowing that Minseok is happy with someone who is not him breaks him apart.

"I love you," Luhan said, there's desperation in his voice. He said it as if his life depends on it and he need to hear Minseok said it too. "You love me too, right?"

Minseok smiled as he heard those words. "Of course, silly. I love you, too." Even though sometimes loving you is painful, even though sometimes it's tiring. Even though sometimes they were on the verge of breaking up. 

"I love you, always." 

That's true. Minseok realized that even though there were moments were he felt like this relationship with Luhan is not worth it anymore, there were moments— moments like this— that will prove him wrong. That even though sometimes loving him was so difficult, he will always love him.

That even though sometimes, Minseok almost forgot the small details, the reason why were they together, the reason why he chose Luhan. Luhan will always be there to remind him.

**

a/n: okay another xiuhan's fic huhu i know that i still have an on-going one but this fic had been sitting on my laptop for months now :)) i really wanted to add so many things here but i'll just edit it when exams are over. Mwa!