*Well Happy WonKyu´s day! Enjoy this oneshot made for the special occasion* 

“I can’t do this anymore”

“Do what?” - I asked. My voice squeaked in a way that bothered me almost as much as his words.

“You know what” - Siwon said, his gaze focused on the pages of my latest chapters lying before him, a red pen in his hand as if he was going to grade my work with me sitting right there.

I stared at him, hoping he’d say more without me needing to add anything else to the conversation.

 He put the pen down and ran his hand through his hair. The dark strands gave his hair a handsome and elegant aspect that made him look too young to be a tenured professor, too vulnerable to be telling me we were over. We hadn’t even started. One kiss. One long, beautiful kiss that ruined me for all other men and he was calling it quits?

“I’ve asked Professor Lee to take you on,” he said. “He’s familiar with your thesis and knows the field of research well enough”

My stomach did a flip-flop thing. I wanted to vomit. I looked around his office to calm down. The office I’d been every week for the past two years.  

“Kyuhyun, you’re not saying anything”

Yeah, I wasn’t. I was busy holding down the donuts I ate for dinner. Okay. Food for kids. Why’d I buy that anyway? Because I had no self-control. I never could turn down what I desired, no matter how bad it was for me.

“Kyuhyun” That was my professor voice. The one he used when someone else was around. Not the one he’d used for the past year. Not the one he used when we were alone. He was leaning his elbows on the desk, his eyes wide, his perfect hairstyle shining, but somehow the vulnerability was there. Or maybe it had been my imagination.

 “What? - I said - You want me to work with someone else? Fine”

 “Don’t say it like that. You know I don’t have any other choice”

“Right”

 “We kissed last night. Do you want to pretend that didn’t happen?”

Was he crazy? I’d waited two years to feel his lips on mine. Nothing he said would erase it from my memory. Even if he wanted to forget. Even if he wanted to believe we hadn’t been more than professor and student, more than friends, for a long time.

         I forced myself out of the chair. I was a half-step from the door. Then why couldn’t I make a move toward it?

Because this was it. I had lost my chance with him. Lost the possibility of having both a friend and a lover, having a partner who understood me like no one I’d ever dated, who was smart and funny and the iest man I’d ever known.

I reached for the printed chapters I had handed him five minutes earlier. No way was I leaving them behind. He was done being my advisor. He was done being my best friend. Done being my anything. The papers rattled with the shake of my hand.

Siwon stood and stepped around the desk. “God, babe. Come here” He didn’t wait for me to move. He came to me and pulled me against him, holding me in his arms.

I dropped the pages as he traced an invisible path up and down my back.

“I didn’t think it would upset you this much – Siwon said - I don’t want to hurt you”

         I lowered my head to his shoulder. Two years I had waited to be in his arms and this was all I was ever going to get. I turned toward his neck and breathed deep. He smelled of the cologne he always wore, but it was stronger from this distance. Almost as strong as when I wore the same stuff on the weekends, an action that gave me a bit of a stalker vibe, but I didn’t care. I wanted to smell him on my sheets. Apparently it had been a wise choice. That was the only way I was ever going to have his scent there.

I searched out his skin with my tongue. The salty, rich taste burst into my mouth. I craved more. I opened wider and in the warmth of him.

         “God, Kyuhyun” - Siwon gripped the back of my head. Was he going to make me stop? He held me against him and tilted his head back.

         I circled my arms around his waist and took one small step until our bodies smashed together, leaving not an inch of air between us.

Siwon moaned.

         Good thing his room was at the end of a long hall. Good thing it was too late for office hours.

The soft sound surged adrenaline and lust throughout my body. My filled, and I worked my way to his lips.

The kiss wasn’t soft and slow like the one the night before. It was a kiss between two men who’d spent a damn long time dreaming of this moment, both and ready to feel something more, ready to consummate a year-long love affair we had tried to pretend didn’t exist.

         Only I hadn’t pretended as much as he. I had let myself imagine it all…the touching, the lovemaking, the nights spent in his bed.

Curiously, the one daydream I hadn’t pictured was us ing in his office.

The mental images made me dizzy. I wanted him to lay me over his desk, his laptop and the stuff around, and do every beautiful, naughty thing I’d been dreaming of until I screamed his name.

Siwon touched the side of my face and parted from the kiss.

That was it, then. The last taste I’d ever have.

He still held my face in his hand, though. Until he moved his hand lower. And lower. He reached the bottom of my shirt and gripped the fabric in both fists. He pulled the shirt over my head.

“I want to feel you - He took off his own shirt – I´ve been dying to feel your body against mine”

His hands on my bare chest took away any resistance I could have had. I didn’t care what it all meant for him. I wanted it.

I wanted him.

         Our mouths joined again, his arms tight around me, his hands touching me in all the places I had longed for him to be.

My heart raced at the press of his against my groin. I slid my hands down his arms, loving the heated flesh, the fine muscles that reminded me he didn’t always sit at his desk grading papers.

         “I want you” - my professor voice was full of lust.

A tremble worked through me and my hands shook.

“I want you too”

         He ran a hand through my hair.

“It’s okay, Kyuhyun. We don’t have to…”

Yeah, he was crazy.

I took a step back and reached for the laptop on his desk. I set it and his favorite coffee mug on top of a short bookcase.

He put everything else, my papers included, aside. Pens, sticky notes, paper clips, and a stapler fell to the floor. The top of his desk clean for us.

I undid the zipper on my jeans.

Siwon stared at me. Then his gaze dropped to where I worked my pants open, and his breath hitched. Maybe this was what he’d been dreaming of, a quick in his office.

He stopped my hands.

“Wait - He stepped closer - Let me”

He parted the opening of my jeans, and without removing more of my clothes, he slid his hand inside my briefs.

I arched into the touch. The warmth of his palm around my could no way be compared to the two years of I’d done waiting for this moment.

He met my lips with his again. I gripped his biceps, and my hips matched the rhythm of our tongues. The sweet surrender of kissing him made me dizzy.

He stilled my body with a hand to my hip.

“Wait” – he said all of a sudden.

He had to quit telling me to stop.

He undid his dress pants and took them off together with his underwear, kicking them away with his shoes and socks.

         I froze at the sight of his hard . It was huge but beautiful. The solid flesh couldn’t hide his desire. Neither could his husky voice.

         “Take off your pants” – he commanded me.

         My hands shook more as I undressed. Once I stood , he pressed me against him again. His body tight to mine,