The very loud and deafening blaring of a small alarm clock by the night stand stirred me out of my peaceful sleep and I knocked it off, successfully shutting it up before turning to my side. I tried going back to sleep, but it was proven to be a failure as the vibrant summer rays peeked from the small gap of the curtain. Slowly and rather reluctantly, I blinked, closed my eyes and blinked again just to clear my vision. Something warm snuggled up to my chest and I couldn’t stop a smile from appearing on my face. 

I slightly pulled the blanket lower, just right below the other occupant of the bed’s nose and chuckled. He had his lips slightly apart, his hair pointing in different directions and his cheeks squished against the pillow. Soft snores were leaving from the latter’s pink lips and I didn’t have the heart to wake him up. Ten more minutes I thought before shifting closer to him. I gently brushed my thumb against his cheek throughout the minutes and it slowly aroused him from his sleep.  I watched as his eyebrows furrowed before he crunched his face up as a ray of sun hits him in the face and then my breath was taken away right when those beautiful pair of eyes of his fluttered open. His eyes were the color of earth kissed by spring rains, like new growth on the boughs of the trees, bright and youthful. 

“Good morning,” I whispered, thumbing his cheek as he lazily blinked at me; his gaze as cool as soft rain on petals. 

“Good morning.” He returned, shutting his eyes when my hand moved down to his jaw.  Contented sigh left his lips and he opened his eyes back. “You’re up early..” He croaked before clearing his throat and I smiled as I left a fleeting kiss on his little nose causing him to scrunch his face up. “Brush your teeth first.” He said, tsk-ing under his breath when I moved forward just to leave another kiss on his eyebrow. 

“You look gorgeous.”

“I probably look like someone who just got up after rolling on the grass.” He stated indifferently. “You know, with dead leaves and dirt sticking to my hair.” He added.

“Youngjae,”

“Hm?”

“Youngjae,”

“What is it?”

“Youngjae,”

“Daehyun..” He called, my name rolling off his tongue effortlessly. He gave me a questioning look before sighing and sitting up, the cover sliding down to his waist. His oversized shirt was clearly too big for him as it slid off his shoulder and I couldn’t help but to stare at the exposed expanse of skin. He threw his legs off the bed and stifled a yawn before getting off; the soft pads of his footsteps echoing in the room. I didn’t move from the bed and only watched him enter the bathroom before coming back out minutes later with a towel around his neck, droplets of water desperately clinging to his face and his wet bangs stuck to his forehead. “What are you staring at?” He questioned, casually changing into a new shirt and sweatpants in front of me. 

“What do you think?” I asked back and got up before disappearing into the bathroom. The scoff he gave didn’t go unheard by me of course. By the time I got out of the room, feeling fresh and clean, the smell of breakfast in the air had my stomach rumbling out of hunger. I my lips and went to the kitchen where Youngjae was busy serving the food on the table. He put two pancakes on each plate and looked up upon noticing my presence. “Smells good.”

A smile. “Sit down, I’ll join you in a second.” Without wasting time, I quickly made myself comfortable at the dining table and waited for Youngjae to take the apron off of him before he went to his seat; across the table. We exchanged small smiles and stuffed ourselves up right after.

“Do you have plans for today?” 

“Nope.” I mumbled, chewing the food. “Why?”

“Just wondering.” Youngjae said and it had me quirking an eyebrow up questioningly. I opened my mouth with the intention of wanting to ask him something when he suddenly looked up, his round bright eyes blinking so innocently. The image didn’t last long as his face twisted into a look of disgust. “Close your mouth, dummy.” He scowled, shaking his head. “That’s really disgusting.” He added a second later before getting up from his seat and putting the empty plate in the sink. “It’s your turn to do the dishes.” 

“Okay.” I replied and continued gobbling down the breakfast. By the time I was done with my breakfast and the dishes, Youngjae was already sprawled on the couch, a look that screamed ‘BORED’ marred on his face as he pouted, his eyebrows knitted. “Hey,” I called and he pulled his legs to give me some space to sit before putting his legs over my lap; a look of satisfaction appeared on his face. 

“I’m bored.” He stated, fiddling with the thread of his sleeve and looked up to me expectantly while I brushed my fingers against his flawless leg. I couldn’t help but to be slightly amazed by how little to no hair Youngjae had on his legs compared to mine. I had seen him countless of times- and I could assure you that no one could rival him- but I couldn’t help to be awed of his body every single time.  A nudge in my ribs had me jolting in surprise and I turned my head to Youngjae who was looking at me in a puzzled way. “What are you thinking?” He questioned, about to pull his legs up until I held them and leaned forward to steal a kiss from him. 

“You.” 

Normally people would coo over this and reply with a ‘how sweet of you’, but Youngjae was different. “Weirdo.” Came the word from him and I grinned, leaving a fleeting kiss on his cheek at which he could only look at me stupefyingly. “Did you..did you knock your head somewhere in the bathroom..?” Chuckling, I shook my head and lifts his legs off before heading to the room, his gaze still on me. Right before I entered the room, I looked over my shoulder. 

“I’m going to the pool. Want to tag along?”

“Yeah.” Youngjae instantly answered, switched the TV off before hopping to his feet and following me into the room. After packing all my stuff and changing into a more casual outfit, I waited for Youngjae at the door and could hear the sound of utensils clanking in the kitchen before he appeared with what seemed to be a lunchbox in his hand. A sheepish smile appeared on his face and I held my hand out; him looking at it with a small shy smile dancing on his lips. 

 

 

My air bubbles made their way to the surface with every exhale as I cruised along the lane with powerful rhythmic ; nailing perfection. After ten years of swimming, fourty laps didn’t sound so tiring anymore. In fact, it was stress relieving. Emerging from the crystal blue chlorinated water, I heaved a deep breath and almost shiver at the feeling of cold air slicing through my skin. A pair of legs appear in my vision and I took my goggles off; my sight cleared of droplets of water. 

“Hey,” Youngjae greeted before sitting down and tilting his head to the side while smiling at me. “You’ve been swimming non-stop. Is something bothering you?” He asked, his voice laced with concern. Preferring to not worry the latter, I shook my head and grabbed his wrist, pulling him towards me and fear flashed in his eyes for a second as he tried to pull back. “No,” He squeaked. 

“I’ll hold you.” I said, reassuring him and tugged him towards me once again. It was evident that he was afraid of joining me since he had admitted a few years ago that he couldn’t swim (Yet, it didn’t stop him from coming with me to the pool). Smiling, I grabbed both of his wrists gently and slowly tugged him closer while he whined the as he got nearer to the edge of the pool. “Don’t worry.”

“Wait, wait, wait. I can’t.”

“Youngjae.” I called and I watched as his eyes flickered from my face and back to the water. Uncertainty washing over him. “I won’t let you go.” Youngjae went quiet for a while, his eyes fixed on my fingers wrapped around his wrist. After a few minutes, he finally nodded and gingerly shifted closer until his legs were in the water. Putting my arms on his waist, Youngjae swallowed the lump in his throat as he gripped my arms, his fingers curling so tightly that I swear if he held it tighter than now, my arm would be crushed in his grasp. “One,” I counted, eyes fixed on his.

“Two,” 

“If you let me go. You’re dead.”

I chuckled and ended the count with a “Three.” He held his breath and I quickly wrapped my arms around his waist while he instantly wrapped his around my neck before he dropped himself in.  “You okay?” I asked, genuinely concerned as I slowly brought us away from the edge; Youngjae looking at the increasing distance unhappily. “See?” I spoke.  “It’s not so bad, right?”

“Yeah. Until you let me go and leave me drowning.” Youngjae scowled, glaring at me which emitted a bubbly laugh from me. We stayed in the pool for a while longer and Youngjae was already lying his head on my shoulder, his eyes half lidded and his fingers drawing circles on my shoulders while my feet continued to paddle to keep us afloat. “What’s in your head?” A small smile threatened to appear and I successfully held it back before tightening my arms around his waist and pecking his forehead. I could never hide anything  from Youngjae. He had always been good at reading me and this time was no exception. 

“I’m just tired.”

“Do you want to go home, then?” I kept mum for a moment, contemplating with myself  before deciding to just accept the suggestion. Moving to the edge, I let Youngjae climb up first before I did and he quickly rushed to our bags where he grabbed a towel and throw it over me, wiping my face dry and pecking me on the lips. “Let’s get changed, okay?” He said, slinging our bag over his shoulder and pulling me to the changing room where it was void of people-as any other days on weekdays. 

We took a short shower and when I stepped into the changing room, Youngjae was standing by the bench with his facing me. He was already in his jeans, his shirt still on the bench as he dried his hair while humming to a melody, oblivious of my presence. I couldn’t help but to admire him for a while. Youngjae had a small head so it wasn’t unsurprising that his shoulders looked broader than normal when in fact ours were of the same width. What was different about Youngjae’s body than the majority of the guys was that he had a small waist not to mention his arms and wrists were small too (and I delightedly could wrap my fingers around his beautiful wrists as much as I want to). His skin glowed and looked so flawless,  the urge to run my fingers along his skin growing the longer I stared. 

I subconsciously took steps closer to him till my chest was on his back and my arms snaking around his waist sneakily. I pulled him back to me and his body went rigid for a moment before he relaxed, his head resting on my shoulder so comfortably while I nuzzled at his neck; inhaling the sweet lavender smell of the soap he had used. “You smell like home..” I whispered, my breath ghosting over his sensitive skin, igniting shivers from him. The soothing rubs on my hand almost lulled me to sleep and I took one last deep breath before detaching myself from him. “Let’s eat the food you prepared when we reach home.”

“Okay,” He softly said, smiling before putting his shirt on and signaling at me that he was going to wait outside. Without wasting time and not having any intentions of letting my lover wait for me too long, I threw my clothes on and ruffled my hair; droplets of water flying off in different directions. Youngjae was standing by the exit, his arms hanging idly by his side and totally covered by the overly long sleeves. Youngjae looked so cute this way and I grinned at the sight before grabbing his hand that he held out for me. “Let’s go?” I hummed in response and we walked out of the building, hand in hand and our steps synchronized. 

Instead of taking the bus and the usual route home, we decided to take the long way home; simply enjoying the company of each other and warmth radiating from our fingertips. Occasionally, Youngjae’s fingers would fiddle with mine before he hooked a finger around mine and then just clasping them together once again. I could only smile at the cute actions.

The weather was the kind that felt like a kiss of summer without the fiery heat of noon time in August. The grass was a soft green that almost had a hint of yellow and in the sky was enough pristine white cloud to show how beautiful the sky was, how perfect. The concrete of the path was warm under our shoes’ soles. Blue skies, no wind, ambient temperature – it was more like an absence of weather really. Perfect for our long walk. A fresh breath of air caressed our faces lovingly and I closed my eyes for a second before opening them back, turning to look at Youngjae who had a peaceful look on his face as he swung arms back and forth slowly and happily. 

“You seem to be in a good mood today.” I chuckled, him looking at me with a raised eyebrow. 

“And you seem to be stressed about something.” He retorted causing me to look away with a sigh. I tried to not make it obvious, but Youngjae had always been the kind that could catch up with almost anything. Especially me. “Daehyun..” He softly called, stopping in his tracks and tugging me back to face him. “What’s wrong? Why..why aren’t you telling me anything?” He worryingly asked as he brought his hand up to my jaw and rubbing the skin there. 

“I just..it’s really nothing. Come on,”

“Daehyun,” He pouted, tugging me again and giving me the eyes. God.

“It’s seriously nothing. Come on.”

“Are you really going to keep it a secret.”

“Let’s go home.” I grunted, pulling him with me despite him trying to wiggle his hand out of my hold. The whole journey home right after being nothing but thick atmosphere and irritation building on Youngjae’s face. I glanced over my shoulder to see him avoiding my eyes and looking at the marbled floor instead and guilt was slowly building up in me, but I had to follow the plan. In the elevator, Youngjae tried to pull his hand out of my hold and I unreluctantly let his hand go; hoping that everything was going according to what I had planned. 

I fished my phone out to check any incoming messages and held back a sigh of relief before sliding my phone back in my pocket. The nervousness  was slowly growing in me and truthfully, I had no idea if any of this was going to go well. Making Youngjae sulk was definitely not part of the plan (screw my disability to hide my train of thoughts). Gripping the strap of my bag tightly, my knuckles turned white and I locked my jaws as anxiousness flowed in my system. Don’t worry. I told myself as the number flashing in green slowly rose. It’ll all work out. You’ve been planning for this  for 2 months. Everything will be okay. 

A ding echoed in my eyes and my head snapped at the number displayed above the door. “..” I half whispered and half wheezed (hoping Youngjae did not hear that) before stepping out with Youngjae still not showing any hint that he was going to talk to me. Since I had the apartment keys with me, I felt much more nervous than ever. What if Youngjae wouldn’t like the surprise? What if he stopped talking to me after this? What if he I failed at surprising him? W-

“Daehyun.” Blinking, I looked over my shoulder to see Youngjae with a frown on his face. “Are we going to stand here any longer or are you going to open the door?” He questioned and I could sense a slight annoyance in his tone. Great. Just great. I had probably pissed him off more. What a way to go Jung Daehyun!  Mumbling an apology, I tried my best to hide my shaking hands while opening the door, although the jingling of the keys probably blew my cover. A click came from the door and I could only swallow the lump in my throat before I let him inside first and followed close, shutting the door behind me softly. 

It was now or never. 

“Happy fourth anniversary!” 

The silence that came right after those words left my mouth was seriously unexpected. I had thought that something went wrong since Youngjae just stood there, motionless and not saying a word. Looking over his shoulder, I took a quick glance of the living room and nodded to myself with satisfaction. Junhong did a great job with the decorations. Everything was in place as I wanted. A table with white cloth at the center, a transparent vase with a flower on the table, plates and utensils set, red and white balloons literally covering the ceiling and candles at each end of the room. Everything was perfect. 

What went wrong?

“Babe-“

“What the hell is this..”

Okay, that was seriously startling. “I-“

“I hate you.” Youngjae had whispered, loud enough for the both of us to hear before he spun on his feet and jumped on me causing me to stumble back in surprise. His arms were tightly wrapped around me and his shoulders were shaking. “I thought something seriously wrong happened. You made me worried.” He sniffled, hiding his face in my shirt which gave me no chance of pulling him away to look at his face.  He took a deep breath before mumbling, “Happy fourth anniversary to you too..” as he grasp slacken. I took that as a chance to pull him away and look at his face.

A shade of red was painting his cheeks and he looked absolutely embarrassed, but I could only chuckle in relief. “, I thought I did something wrong.” I heaved, shaking my head and thumbing his cheek, my other hand resting on his waist. “Don’t scare me like that.”

“What do you mean ‘me’? I was the one who was worried!” Youngjae whined, hitting my chest softly and wiping the leaked tears with the back of his hand. “I hate you.” He hissed, biting his lower lips and glaring at me. None of it affected me and I leaned down to his face, his breathing fanning my face before capturing his lips in a kiss that felt so right. I pressed my tongue to the seam of his lips and, at his grant of access, delved inside his mouth. It was a very sloppy kiss with the strong fragrant of rose that Junhong probably had sprayed earlier, lingering around us. 

Both of my hands drifted to his hip. It settled there and I pulled him closer, causing him to inhale sharply as he tilted his head to the side. A hand was placed on my chest and when we broke apart for air, I rested my forehead against his and gathered some much needed oxygen. His smile had me smiling and I pecked his glistening red lips before pulling myself away from him. Wrapping my fingers around his delicate wrist, I pulled him over to the table where he sat while I assured him I’ll be back quick before rushing off to the kitchen. On the counter were trays of food that I had asked Junhong to prepare and I mentally screamed thanks at Junhong, reminding myself to reward him by the end of the week. 

I guess we wouldn't be eating eating the lunchbox Youngjae had prepared.

 

 

“Don’t scare me ever again.”

“Were you scared or worried?” I asked, wriggling my eyebrow which earned me a scoff from him. He swirled the spaghetti around his fork before pouting at the food and heaving a sigh to which I quirked an eyebrow up out of curiosity. "What's wrong?"

"I actually thought you were going to break up with me."

"What?" I exclaimed, my eyes widen from surprised. Never had I thought of such thing yet here Youngjae was, telling me that he actually thought it would happen. "Youngjae, you know I would never-"

"I know, i know." He quickly intercepted. "I was just worried because you've been looking really anxious since last month. You couldn't even look at me in the eyes sometimes. Like, what was I supposed to think?" 

Biting my lower lips with guilt, I slowly reached out for his hand on the table and uncurled his fingers before intertwining our fingers together.

"I love you." I said and smiled upon seeing a smile dancing on his rosy pink lips. "I'm sorry for worrying you and making you think of such thing. I'm really sorry, but just know that I really do love you and nothing can change that."

"What about wrinkles? What if my has wr-"

"Youngjae, don't ruin the mood."

"No, but seriously. Imagine having wrinkles o-"

Deciding to have enough with what he was about to say, I immediately stood and bent over the table while pulling him forward by his shirt, taking him by surprise. A gasp left his lips as I captured them in a sweet kiss; the strong  taste of old wine being exchanged between our kisses and our breathes intermingling. 

When I pulled away, Youngjae had that dazed look on his face, his eyes hazy and his lips shimmering with saliva. "I love you too." He whispered before pressing his lips against mine for the umpteenth time of the night.