Taehyung never knew that it hurt like hell. Noㅡ it was ultimately painful. The same pain and throbbing sensation in the middle of his chest when he was ill and had difficulty to breathe properly. That pain was no joke, he remembered wailing and sobbing non-stop and curled himself up like a ball, ignoring his parents assuring that he would be fine because deep inside, even though he was just six years old that time, he wasn't a fool to believe that he was fine if he couldn't breathe and he feel like dying.

Jeongguk was the main reason why he was feeling right now. Apparently, their youngest was the special mc for music core this Saturday alongside with Twices' Sana. The red-haired male was aware that their youngest liked Twice not only Twice but some other girl and boy groups as well, he was sort of a fanboy. Taehyung would occasionally teased their youngest regarding it with his rectangular grin and Jeongguk would smile sheepishly, rubbing his hair between his fingers, a sign that he was embarrassed. During those times, it was nothing to him; Jeongguk liking girl groups because he knew that the male was frightened about the thought of having a close contact and conversation with a girl especially someone in their industry so, he was not worried about it nevertheless, today was a exception. 

"Taehyung-ah, you okay?" Jimin, the person sitting behind him inside of their dressing room asked him out of blue, they were getting ready for their upcoming stage and was watching their youngest doing his best to show what he got in mc-ing. The mentioned MC was wearing a orange stripped tee tucked in his jeans and damn, he looked so ing handsome still. "You look like going to pass out." The black-haired male gave him a glance before turning his gaze again to the flat screen television provided by the music show in order for them to know what was currently happening. 

Taehyung felt the chill running up to his spines by that question, he paused a minute to think a good excuse that the latter would believe him. Without facing the male behind him, he chuckled shortly and shook his head once not twice, yeah. "I'm one-hundred percent fine. How about you, Jimin-ah? Seeing your favorite person flirting with other girls? Ouch." Making his voice cute followed by a giggle which sounded not so sincere. 

"It's just a job, it's scripted." Jimin defended and ruffled his reddish hair, their cordi-noona saw him and scolded him for ruining Taehyung's hair. The suspect laughed nervously and apologised before continuing what he was about to say. "And isn't that a great thing? He's growing up. Jeongguk needs to socialize more." That was it. That was enough for him to feel the anger boiling in his veins. It was just a job. Scripted and Jeongguk had the rights to be-friend anybody but Taehyung was selfish and didn't want that to occur. 

Not uttering a word, Taehyung sighed quietly and stared at their youngest face on the television. He was being all cute and showing aegyos here and there. It felt like Jeongguk was showing off in front of the girls. The red-haired male nibbled on his lips in fury, he felt very insecure and depressed knowing that he wasn't capable of attracting their youngest in a most romantic way he could think of. He was a guy for pete's sakes. Jeongguk would never look at him like how he looked at him with love and adoration sparkling in his eyes whenever he observe him afar and sometimes, near. Furthermore, he wanted to add that this wasn't the first time he felt the thing called jealousy, he seldom experienced it when Jimin, one of his closest decided to shower Jeongguk with affections and never failed to take care of him the most considering when Jeongguk called in sick because of tonsillitis. Jimin pampered their youngest and stayed by his side twenty four seven disregarding the complaints of Jeongguk to sleep in their room because he wasn't a baby anymore but Jimin insisted that he would make sure that he was getting all the care he needed to get. Taehyung wanted to do the same thing either but the black-haired male beat him up on it. Basically, he felt useless. But it didn't hurt so much like this. 

Taehyung felt a headache coming after a couple of minutes pondering, he grabbed his phone and stared at his reflection on the camera checking if he looked presentable and decent because Jeongguk had  finished mc-ing and was about to approach the door. The red-haired male arranged his fringe cautiously and blinked his eyes to be sure that his contact lens was still shining beautifully enough to capture their youngest attention, if possible. If that was possible.

The red-haired male immediately stood up when he heard the door opened, his heart dropped as he noticed Jeongguk's wide bunny smile and his ears were red. The younger really had fun with whatever he did earlier and probably feeling proud of himself to conquer his fears in talking with girls without stuttering and fainting. Nevertheless, he was the first person to envelop the younger in a tight embrace and praised him that he did a good and neat job. He felt selfish again when Jeongguk hugged him back just as tight as his hold and seriously, he wanted to cry on the younger's broad chest because damn, he didn't had the logic that hugging Jeongguk could trigger all the negative feelings he felt. Like, he wanted to burst out and confess here and there.

"Thank you, hyung." Jeongguk smiled at him kindly and pulled back, eyes meeting with the red-haired male's. "Your eyes made you more handsome, by the way." He cheekily added, managing the older to blush evidently.

"TㅡThanks." Taehyung stammered, suddenly he felt strongly happy that he did notice it just like what he had imagined, "You must be tired. Here, have a seat." He offered, obviously wearing his sweetest smile reserved only for the younger. 

The other members started to huddle closer to their youngest as he took the seat which were the red-haired male seated earlier never forgetting to compliment him and make fun of him about courting Saeron or Sana in the mere future which their youngest scoffed of. Startled by the eventual topic popped out, Taehyung detached himself away from the group while looking down on the ground with a dejected expression on his face. That day would be the most heartbreaking moment in his life if that happened in reality.

ㅡ 

Throughout the day, Taehyung acted like he didn't care and he was okay even though he was clearly not. He was breaking inside, his eyes kept on b in salty tears while they were heading home after the fan signing event and he would secretly wiped it with his closed fist making excuses that his contact lens irritated his eyes that's why it became teary. He felt so fake today. He was totally faking, everything. To be honest, he felt refreshed during the fan signing event because the fans; armys occupied his time and meeting their fans was one of his favorite to do nonetheless when they bid their last words, he felt down and upset again. 

Jeongguk was between him and Jimin, the brown-haired male was fumbling on his phone playing Hungry Shark, his momentarily latest addiction. It was such pleasing to watch how the younger would  frown and then smile in victory at any time he succeeded a level nor beat his own high scores. Taehyung fought back the urge to caress the male's brownish hair and settle himself to play with Jeongguk's earrings, instead. The younger didn't show any hints of being uncomfortable with it so he played with it until they got home to distract himself. 

After an hour they reached their destination. They were about to enter their dorm once they got out from the car but someone held his wrist and it was Jeongguk and he muttered, "Jeongguk-ah, we need to rest." It was just an excuse of him to avoid the possible arguments with the younger, absolutely. 

Jeongguk halted until they were the only members left outside, his grip on the older wrist got more firm. "I know but something's off." He sounded concern and conscientious making the older scared and emotional. "They've noticed your behaviour, either. But because I don't want to wait for you to open up with me or with us, I thought I should do the initiative." The younger stated softly, tending him to gaze up at Jeongguk and flinched when he saw how those black orbs gazing back at him, tenderly.

"Does it make me special to you?" Taehyung almost whispered, afraid of rejection. Fortunately, the latter heard him well, thanks to Jeongguk's hearing skills. 

Raising an eyebrow suspiciously at the older, Jeongguk exhaled and nodded his head. "Of course you are, Tae."

Taehyung looked away and the familiar heavy blocks were placed again on his shoulders, he felt like crying so he did and let himself get carried away, "You don't understand, Jeongguk. And it's funny how I badly yearned for you to understand." He strained out, he could still speak accurately because he wasn't sobbing, for now.

Confused and troubled by the red-haired actions and terms of speech, he released his wrist then traveled his hand down to grab Taehyung's surprisingly freezing hand. "Then make me, Taehyung." 

Taehyung was having a mental crisis in between of forming the words he wanted to let off of his chest and Jeongguk's holding his freaking hand. Mind it, they weren't even in front of the cameras and they were not even in a event or in their concert to hold hands like this. It felt surreal and flattering. He felt warm and fuzzy, it felt really really amazing. Brushing off the tingling tickles stimulated by his love for the younger, he opened his mouth hesitantly to speak his true feelings. "It hurts. Why does it feels like you're rubbing on my face that you can't love me back more than as a friend or brother? Why do you always make me feel like a bastard of thinking that I own you and nobody should touch nor steal you away from me? And can you please stop smiling, Jeongguk? Because whenever you smile, I feel blind because you're stunning and shining in my sight! I feel selfish. Also, can you please stop cuddling with me then make my heart thump beastly! I want to have the rights to be jealous and I want you to love me, despite of the fact that you can't and this goddamned confession could only lead toㅡ" his eyes swam in overflowing tears and his heart beat erratically as Jeongguk began interlacing their fingers together and giving his hand a light and soothing squeeze encouraging him to continue, "ㅡa-and I'm bawling my eyes tonight because you're giving me false hopes because I love youㅡ damn it. W-Why am I crying so much." Taehyung ended his confession and desperately wiping the tears on his cheeks using the pad of his fingers with his free hand. 

"I love you, too." His world stopped spinning for awhile. Stunned, Taehyung flinched and jumped back a little. "You were jealous when I flirted with Saeron and Sana back then right and this happened?" He could only have the energy remained to nod. "It was scripted, hyung. And if you're wondering if my I love you too is scripted as well, you better cut that crap out and trust me more, will you?" Jeongguk massaged his knuckles with his thumb. 

Taehyung couldn't endure anymore, he closed the gap separating them and kissed the younger with all of his might. He couldn't even be more happier when he felt Jeongguk's lips moving against his, they were in sync and the younger cupped his cheeks to pull him even more closer. The red-haired male clutched on the younger's tee shirt as he felt the wobbliness caused by their shared kiss. 

When they both pulled away, Taehyung rested his head against the brown-haired male's chest and the tears got dry on his skin, none of them cared, anyway. "I love you so much, this isn't a dream." He murmured, sniffing Jeongguk's nostalgic scent. 

Jeongguk smiled fondly and pecked on his temple before confirming it wasn't a dream and he was completely in love with Taehyung too for the long period of time already but much paranoid to confess.