“How could you do that Jisoo?!” Jeonghan had been yelling at Joshua as soon as they entered the house, the latter completely oblivious to the reason behind his husband's ranting.

“Huh? What did I do?” He questioned, sitting on the edge of their queen sized bed, eyeing Jeonghan as removed his tie.

“Telling my parents about how much we have, what the hell!” Jeonghan stood behind the open closet door, the sound of clattering hangers growing louder as he looked for clothes to change into.

“Well, it is an adult’s topic to discuss, right?” Jisoo countered.

“Even if it were, I wouldn't talk about that to your parents!” he glared at his husband sitting on the bed, attempting to bore holes through him with his eyes.

“My parents are different to yours, Jeonghan.”

“Don’t give me that, if you wouldn't talk about it to your parents then don't talk about it to mine!

There was an awkward silence between them for a moment before Jisoo responded.

“It's not that I don't wan-”

A pair of gray sweatpants were thrown at his head rather aggressively, cutting him off.

“Could you take this seriously for once?!” Now they're going to expect dozens of kids!”

Jisoo didn't respond. Jeonghan stuck his head out from the side of the closet door and attempted to bore holes through his husband again with a glare.

“I'd like a dozen kids. Don't you think it'd be fun?” He shrugged and removed his pants.

“You think we can afford that?”

Jisoo didn't respond.

Jeonghan groaned loudly before slamming the closet door and walking to the bathroom to freshen up. He wasn't the most easily annoyed person in the world, in fact he was pretty laid back but  the two had been having the same argument for weeks over what most couples had problems with. Kids. It was honestly getting annoying. It was true that having a dozen kids would be fun, but their financial situation said otherwise. It didn't help that when Jeonghan bought up how their situation would affect having kids, Jisoo would brush it off like nothing was wrong with having kids while they were poor.

He changed into a T-shirt and  walked back into the room and stood in front of Jisoo.

“Well? Aren't you gonna say something?” He put his hands on his hips and waited for Jisoo to respond.

Jisoo thought that Jeonghan was really cute when he was angry. Aside from what Jeonghan would be angry about, (because that put him off honestly) his face was too irresistible when he was angry which made Jisoo want to pinch his cheeks. But he refrained from doing so as he had paid dearly for for his previous attempts, losing Jeonghan’s lips. Maybe he could diffuse the situation with a kiss? Jeonghan surely wouldn't be able to resist one after so long.

“Jeoghan I…..” He stood up and leaned forward for a kiss but Jeonghan predicted this would happen and just turned around abruptly, giving Jisoo’s face a whip from his hair. He began walking over to the side of the bed

Or so he thought.

Jisoo sighed in frustration and grabbed Jeonghan’s arm with more force than he should have. He pulled him, turned him around and looked him in the eye.

“What do you want me to say?!” He raised his voice at Jeonghan which he normally didn't do, but honestly, arguing over the same topic for so long had put him at his limit.

Jeonghan flinched and tears welled up in his eyes at Jisoo’s sudden rage. Jisoo immediately regretted raising his voice at his husband and hugged him knowing what would happen. He felt Jeonghan lean into the hug and heard Jeonghan start sobbing. Jisoo felt Jeonghan’s head on his shoulder which was getting wet from his husband’s tears.

The couple remained quiet as Jeonghan calmed down. They didn't need to say anything to each other because Jisoo was conveying his apology through his hug and Jeonghan was conveying his acceptance through his tears.

The years had been rough on the couple with the pair still on a pay rate still close to minimum wage on top of the debt they owed (and that they wouldn't accept any kind of financial assistance) but it didn’t affect them as bad as it would normal people. Being best friends for sixteen years, and lovers for eight meant the two didn't need words to convey their feelings. Simple actions were enough.

Jeonghan raised his head from Jisoo’s shoulder and they looked each other in the eyes. They were having another one of their wordless conversations, the ones which led people to believe they had telepathic abilities, the ones which led people to believe they were soulmates after all.

“I'm sorry….I shouldn’t have yelled at you….” Jisoo began but Jeonghan shook his head and spoke up.

“No, I'm sorry….I shouldn't have pushed you….” Jeonghan looked at the ground in embarrassment.

Jisoo took the opportunity to tuck Jeonghan’s stray bangs behind his ear so he could see his husband’s face clearly. Jeonghan looked back up at Jisoo who was now smiling lovingly at him. Jisoo couldn't help himself at the sight of Jeonghan being so cute. He wrapped his arm around Jeonghan’s waist and leaned in for a kiss.

Their lips met and it felt like their first kiss all over again. He felt Jeonghan’s arms go around his neck and it felt so good after so many weeks orf rejection to finally be accepted again. Jisoo admitted that he loved their steamy make out sessions where their hands roamed and their tongues danced till they ran out of breath but these kisses were his favorite. They conveyed all of their love, anger, devotion and everything through just one kiss. Their bodies fit together perfectly like pieces of a puzzle.

They seperated from each other and got into their bed, snuggling close to each other under the sheets. The pair gazed at each other with love-filled eyes and shared a few more kisses. It felt like the day they started dating all over again.

“So………” Jisoo began

“So………” Jeonghan repeated, encouraging Jisoo to continue

“Do you accept my apology?” He asked, his voice full of hope.

“I don't care anymore. It doesn’t matter.” Jeonghan replied while smiling.

They both laid there, enjoying each other’s company.

“You know….” Jeonghan started, shifting on the bed to snuggle closer to Jisoo so he could lay on his chest.

“Even if we don't have the best things, we still have each other…...and that's what matters most, right?” He looked up,at Jisoo and smiled, making Jisoo’s heart skip a beat.

“God, I love you so much” He blurted instinctively

Jeonghan chuckled and gave Jisoo a kiss on the cheek.

“I love you too”

The cold air made Jeonghan rush into the Hong residence and shut the door as quickly as he could. He brushed the snow off of himself and removed his shoes, walking into the living room.

He didn't have to look up to know that all eyes were on him because conversation does not cut off that fast. There was a table draped in a purple table cloth and top of it sat a large portrait of Jisoo who was smiling and an urn. It was one of the smiles he saved only for Jeonghan. He figured he must've taken that photo but how they got it he would never know.

Jeonghan felt his throat constrict at the sight and looked down again. He ignored all the eyes on him and made his way over to join his friends.

Seungkwan, Chan, Soonyoung, Mingyu and Minghao looked like they had just bawled their eyes out while Seungcheol, Hansol and Seokmin looked on the verge of tears. Junhui, Jihoon and Wonwoo looked as if they were bottling everything in, although they were doing it pretty poorly.

He joined his friends last in the line. From up front he could see everyone’s faces more clearly and it didn't add to his own feeling of depression.

A mic was handed to Seungcheol who was first in line and Jeonghan was ready to tune out their eulogies. Jisoo wanted each of them to share a good memory about him because he didn't want his funeral to be a sad one. “Rather than mourn about my death, celebrate my life!” He said. Jeonghan didn't get why he was taking dying so easily and he had put off writing a eulogy for a while.

“Hey guys...I'm Seungcheol, one of Jisoo’s friends.” He let out a shaky breath before continuing. “Jisoo asked not that we mourn over his death but that we celebrate his life so….each of us are going to share a memory.” He unwrinkled his paper before continuing. “We've got eleven more of these so I better make this quick…” He chuckled nervously in an attempt to lighten the mood which worked to some extent.

Jeonghan didn't listen when Seungcheol continued speaking. He didn't need to because he was there when everything happened so he didn't need to hear it again. He heard laughing and excited talking but it was all jumbled.

When it was his turn, he shakily grabbed the mic from Jihoon. Everyone looked at him expectantly, smiles plastered on their faces from the previous stories. It pissed him off how happy they were while he was dying inside.

He didn't expect the yelp that escaped his throat as soon as he opened his mouth. He didn't expect the immediate watering of his eyes following the yelp. He didn't expect his whole body to tremble as he broke in front of everyone.

Jeonghan dropped the mic and grabbed the urn with his husband's ashes in it. He rushed to the door ignoring the protests of everyone. He didn't hear any protests from his friends and thanked them in his head for understanding.

He sat in the train hugging the urn the whole time and drifted off to sleep, exhausted from running and crying.

When Jeonghan got home he quickly removed his shoes and ran straight to his bed, tears streaming down his cheeks still. He lied there with the urn, hugging it tightly and not wanting to let it go. Jeonghan grabbed his phone and shakily dialled Jisoo’s number. His heart shattered even more when he thought it wasn't possible when he heard his husband’s voicemail. He let out a shaky breath and redialled it.

“Hello, this is Hong Jisoo. I can't answer the phone right now so just leave a message and I'll get right back to you.” When he heard his husband’s voice emit from the phone he cried even more. It crushed his heart so much hearing the disembodied voice.

Jeonghan’s pillow was already soaked in tears. He closed his eyes, unable to hold back his tears. He wanted to hear that voice form words like “I love you” and “I miss you”

He curled up into the sheets and left the spot next to him empty as he did the past month.

Jeonghan didn't stop crying.

If only he knew what little time he had left with Jisoo then he wouldn't have spent it bickering.

If only he knew