They said..

Love is a beautiful thing.

I agree.

They said also..

I need someone to love and be loved.

Yes, I feel lonely sometimes.

But..

Why don’t they say loving can hurt too?

I have no idea that beautiful memories can bring your eyes wet.

Jongin-ahh..

Do you remember? Our first day as a couple?

You promised me something.

And you broke it.

Along with my heart.

    Kim Jongin, a name that will forever stayed in my heart, no matter how many years have passes, how long its had been, I will never forget, never. I will keep it alive in my mind and soul about our little memories before you burn it all.

   Before you came, I never knew how to love or how to feel safe. But with your warm-smile, you open my closed heart  a little by little until it become wide for you to enter. I don’t really like you at first, you are handsome, tall and has everything I don’t. Other people kept raising you and falling for you. I don’t understand how can they like a young kid so much, you are just a baby.

    You never tried to talk with me too. I heard that you said you were afraid of me, aha! Now I think I’m the one who scared of you.. Right? Unfortunately, every things did changed after we became a roommates. I start noticing how your eyes will follow my movement every time I changing my shirt, I knew you have a hot on me when I suddenly wake up in the middle of night because you were my name.

    From that day, I kept teased you. Touching you here and there because it fun to see how you were flushed from my action. It  all begin with just  some playful  teases but end with really bad idea I ever come with. You start made me feel crazy, sad, happy and angry in one time. You showered me with sweet kisses on my cheeks, warm hug, hot breath and more skinship.

    I don’t mind it, because I thought you were just being nice, you was the same with other members. But when you start whispers some words into my ear, and asking to sleep in the  same bed, I know, something was wrong but still, I let it be. When your hand sneak into my shirt and touching my tummy, I got frozen. Your big hand felt so hot around my skin.

    I don’t have any idea you were gay because you had girlfriend back then, and I’m not gay too. We did talk about this and it give me real shock when you confessed your feeling toward me.

“I like you, hyung.. I promise you to always like you even love you until I die..”

    Without my knowing, you already had your lips on mine’s. It was my first kiss. My first kiss was stolen from my bandmates. I don’t regret it. I choose to be with you with the sins, because it worth the sin.

    You were so good to me, you take cared of me, you brings me to date, you stick by my side when I’m down, you calm me when I’m mad, you kick all the sadness from my life, you become my hero. My one and only hero, Kim Jongin.

    We dated for almost 1 year before EXO finally debut and things still gone smoothly for us. The members accept our relationship with open heart and the fans like us too so that made us even close up with each other. Even though we can’t date like we used to, we still be with each other company when in needed. There’s no more holding hand in public, no more feeding time at outside but there are still some few moment you held my hand when I almost lost at airport, you wiped my dirty sweat on the stage, our relationship was still beautifully grow up.

    I fell for you deeper as the time moving. But, nothing last forever..

After 3 years EXO had debuted, our schedule became more tight than ever. We won many awards, we got many jobs, which mean our time together being cut.In those 3 years, many things had happen