"Baby?" Hanbin yells over the loud music.

"What?" Mijun yells back. Who the hell cared anyway? After all, in a bosterious night club where more than half the people would be either drunk or really drunk, everyone cared for exactly nothing.

"Dance with me!" He says with a sort of giggle which clearly indicates that he too, was drunk.

"I- i can't! You know i can't dance!" The music was getting really loud. And the night was not even close to ending.

"Just sway to the music! Come on!" He takes her hand into his and yanks her closer to himself. They weren't even at the dancefloor; just a few metres from the bar they previously sat at. But then again, no one cared.

"Hanbin, really i can't- what the!" She exclaims with a laugh as Hanbin does this really goofy twerk with an equally goofy grin on his face. "Oh my gosh!" She laughs as she runs her hand through her hair. And that's how it started - their ridiculous dance battle.

Drunk? Yup, they were.

After minutes and minutes of dancing - or whatever it could be called - they finally left the club.

The air outside was crisp, and the atmosphere differred extremely from that of the club. After Hanbin puts his coat on her, they walk away with stupid smiles on their faces. "So, how was it?"

"It was..fun. Much more different than i'd imagine it to be." She giggles. "I liked your dance moves."

"Which one?" He asks as they approach his car.

"All of them."

They share a quick laugh as he opens the door for her, and he himself gets in.

*

"So..this is goodnight, i guess?" He smiles slightly, and with his hands in his pockets, he was about to turn away.

"Wait." She stops him.

"Huh?" He blinks as she wraps her arms around his neck. "Thanks for tonight, Hanbin. I really enjoyed it." She beams at him.

Thud. Thud. Thud. He could hear his own heartbeat.

"See? It doesn't hurt to let go once in a while."

He can see her leaning in, he's internally freaking out but currently is paralyzed. And then it goes as quick as it comes. Soft lips pressing and retreating. And his lips stretch into a smile automatically. That's just like her - enough to keep you hooked but never quite enough.

And she retreats back to the door with a soft blush. "Goodnight Hanbin."

But he's too in the moment to even form a coherent reply and all he knows is that she'd already closed the door.

His best friend kissed him. His crush. His biggest crush on the surface of the earth kissed him. His biggest crush in the whole solar system kissed him and yes, he is blushing and he will never speak of this to another soul because manly men don't blush.

Unless their crush had kissed them and they were extremely happy.

And yes, Hanbin was a happy man for all the good reasons.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

"Hanbin, what the hell happened? I can't remember a single thing."

And his world just caves. Of course. What was he thinking? She was drunk, of course she would've kissed him. I feel stupid.

"Nothing much. You did, however, had the best night of your life." He says with the best smirk he could muster up. But instead was met with a menacing glare and then he notices her grip on the pillow, and it's seconds later that it hits him hard on the face.

"What the hell did you do?!" She squawks.

"Ow! I didn't drug you, calm down." He chuckles. "We got drunk, danced like retards, end of story."

"Sorry, i just...i'm just a bit hangover. I can't even think straight."

She gets up carefully, fumbling in her steps and slowly, slowly leaning towards...the ground?

"Careful!" Hanbin yelps as he grabs her arms. "Baby, you okay?" He pulls her to her feet, hands on her shoulders to keep her steady.

It became a habit : to call her 'baby'. It started as a tease, but somehow it stuck. And more often than not, it came off as a trigger for people to question their relationship.

Best friends - for 18 years, and running.

One-sided love : 9 years and running.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

"Good morning, honey." Mrs. Lee greets her as she and Hanbin makes their way into the kitchen.

"You too, Ma. Can i please have some pain killers? My head is killing me." She groans as she finally lets go of Hanbin's shoulder to sit down.

"Rough night?" She simply smiles as she heads to grab the med.

"I wonder how you're so calm about this, Ma." Hanbin says as he watches her fingers fumble with the tablet of painkillers. "Most moms would freak and snap." Mijun and Hanbin met when they were 5. And maybe Mrs. Lee's name was a hard one to pronounce for a 5 year old, Hanbin stuck to calling her Ma too.

"Hanbin, dear, you know me. I can't and will never be categorized as a one of the 'most moms'." She laughs lightly as she watches her daughter gulp down the meds. "Agreed." Hanbin winks rather playfully.

"Thanks, Ma. Where's Dad?" Says Mijun as she places the glass.

"Out in the backyard." She grimaces. "Lord knows what he's up to."

"Did they call yet?" Mijun looks up at her hopefully.

Mrs. Lee shakes her head with an uneasy smile. "You're only 23, Mijun. Even if you fail this one, you can always try again."

"But Ma, it has to be this one. Just this one. Only this one."

"Don't worry, you'll get it." Hanbin smiles.

"I hope so." She slumps.

"Well, keep hoping 'cause i'm perfectly sure they'll call you in." He reassures her.

He knows what's gonna happen. But he can't tell her yet. Just 'cause.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

It's 3:04pm when she calls him. And breaks the news that he'd been awaiting but secretly dreading.

"I got the job!"

Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.

"Hanbin?" She whispers. "You there?"

"Yeah. Sorry, i was so happy i almost fainted." He jokes even if his mind is in chaos. Relief, confusion, desperation, fright, over-thinking : chaos. His mind - chaos.

"Australia, Hanbin, Australia!" She exclaims over the phone. "This was our dream. I can't even believe this is happening." And he can hear the smile in her voice.

Guilt, fright, shame, desperation : mental breakdown. "I know, babe, i know. But hey, listen..I...." He pauses.

"Yes, Hanbin?"

"See you at the park in ten? I have to tell you this in person."

***

"What?" She asks as soon as he sees her face.

"Mijun, i can't go." It's blunt and raw and painful to say, but he has to do this.

"It's not funny, Kim Hanbin."

"I know it's not. But i'm not joking." He squeezes his palms in his pockets. "I can't go."

"Please tell me you're ting me." She squeezes her eyes shut.

Mijun doesn't curse. But if she does, it means something went wrong. Way wrong.

"Mijun..."

"Please." She looks up at him with eyes so intense it looks as though she's glaring. "Please tell me i wasn't the only one up in my room, every night for 9 ing years, dreaming of Australia, and you, and me. Tell me i wasn't the only one who had the dream of travelling the world with my best friend. Tell me i didn't waste all the years of my high school life studying my off just so i could get a decent job - just because of one dream. And please, do ing tell me that i'm not the only one still dreaming and that you're not bailing on me."

"I'm sorry." He mumbles with his head low. "But i can explain..." He sighs. "Do you mind to listen?

A silence follows. "So much for ing childish dreams. I'll call you when i'm not pissed."

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

The call comes at 11:57pm.

"I'm sorry." Was the first thing he heard.

"You shouldn't be."

"It's just that...i still have this... vision in my head. It's so childish and i don't even know why i am still thinking of it. Even right now."

"I still do too." He slightly smiles. "Like your drawing. You, me, airplanes, but i still don't get the Eiffel Tower."

"You never did." Her voice is soft and tired. "But why.. i mean if you still have that vision, why aren't you dying to go? It's Australia." She almost whines.

"I know. But i can't go, Mijun. I can't just leave my mom. If my dad was still here, it would have been a different story. He was alive back then, and my mom living alone wasn't even in the picture yet. But now it is. I hope you understand. Please, try."

"I understand, Hanbin. What do you take me for? I'm your best friend. And i'm sorry for being insensitive and i'm sorry i lashed out on you."

"Well, for what it's worth i'm sorry too."

Silence.

"I'm leaving next week. On monday."

And his heart drops to his stomach.

"What? That's like-"

"Three days from now, i know. I have to go in on Wednesday, so."

"Why so-"

"Sudden? I don't know why either. Hanbin, i'm literally freaking out inside. I don't know what to do. I wanna go so bad but at the same time i dread it so much. The reason i wanted to go was because you were gonna be there with me, or atleast i thought. I'm going crazy. But i can't just not go. I mean i've been talking about it my whole life, and Ma would support me anyway, but not Dad." A small sigh. "I contacted the authorities. To see if i can shift to the Korea branch.. but it just wasn't possible."

12:09am.

"Mijun. Listen to me very carefully."

He exhales deeply.

"You're gonna go to Australia. You're gonna go, and you're gonna make your parents proud, and you're gonna make me proud, but most of all i want you to make yourself proud. But don't forget to let loose once in a while. I don't want an up-tight best friend." She giggles as soft as the night wind. "And you're gonna stomp on all who ever looked down on you, on us. And you're gonna live out our dream out for you, for me - for us. Is that clear?"

A small hum can be heard on the other end of the line. And Hanbin is pretty sure she's crying.

"But i want you to keep in mind, that i'm always gonna be here when you come back. I'm always gonna be your bestfriend. And i'm always gonna be there to support you if you decide that you can't handle life in Australia anymore. That is, if you decide to give up on the dream, if worst comes to worst. Keep that in mind, okay?"

"Yeah. I will. Thank you, Hanbin."

12:52am

"But who will you hang with if i'm not there?"

"I have Bobby, and my bunch of idiots. I'll be fine."

Silence.

"Hanbin, i don't want to lose you. I don't want to make unstable promises saying that the distance won't break us. I can't make a promise i can't keep."

A long pause, but the reply was firm. "You're not gonna lose me."

"How do you know?"

"I just do. I'm not going to let this friendship die that easy, and we're going to do everything we can to keep saving it from time to time."

"But it's a whole different continent that will seperate us. What if i can't always call, or i can't pick up your calls? What if text messages become too short after a few months? I'm used to telling you everything every night, and if i suddenly can't do that, i might go crazy." She sighs. "I don't like the possibility of an awkward conversation between us in a few months time."

"I can send letters. I'll keep making sure i'll call you even if you don't pick up. I'll make sure to always leave atleast a dozen text messages. I'll make sure to just always be there when you need me, and when you don't."

"Thank you, Hanbin, but keep in mind...that i'll be there for you too if you ever need me. Just remember that i'm only a continent away."

He smiles, even if he knows full well that she can't see it. "This is why i like to have a girl best friend. I can say all the cheesy crap i want and you won't judge me for it. I like this." And he can hear her laugh clearly in the night. Or maybe morning.

01:00am

"I have something to ask you." She mumbles.

"Yes?" Hanbin asks as he flips to the side on his bed.

"I kissed you that night, didn't I?"

Tick.

Tock.

Tick.

Tock.

Tick.

Tock.

"Hanbin?" She sounds scared.

Should I say no, and pretend it never happened? Or should i say yes, and just tell her everything?

"I don't know..." He trails off. "I was pretty drunk."

"Well, just for the record...." She pauses, "I did."

Unsteady breathing, a sign of nervousness. "Why?"

"Because..."

A moment's pause.

"Because i have a vision."

"A vision?" He rubs his eyes. "I'm really lost here."

"A vision consisting of you, me. A vision where we live out our dreams, complete our bucket lists. And a vision where you might fall in love with me in the process, and i can finally tell you what i've been hiding for 10 freaking years. And a vision where we might get married, return to Korea and have kids, build a family. That was my vision; a happily ever after. And i'm shaking because i'm pretty much embarassing myself right now, but i hope now you'll get the Eiffel Tower."

"Mijun, I-"

"No, please. Don't say anything. I just had to get it out, let go, and maybe someday move on."

"But i don't want that."

"Hanbin, you're gonna be far, far away. And you're gonna meet someone, and you're gonna be in love with her, and maybe you'll have a family by the time i return. This is why i am being so paranoid of you not coming."

"Mijun."

But it ends there. A beep, and he's alone in the dark with a phone in hand, staring at the wall and silently gripping his pillow. The words swirl at the tip of his tongue, and he's lost and confused and overwhelmed, all at the same time. He whispers to the emptiness. I love you.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

They don't talk for the few following days. They do call, but neither of them has enough courage to be the one to pick up.

It's late in the evening on Sunday when Hanbin gets invited by Bobby to the club. And he's feeling way too burdened to decline.

And by 11:30pm he's not sure what he's doing anymore.

"Dude, you look like ." Bobby remarks. He'd always been blunt, drunk or not. "Something bothering you?"

"Thanks." He mumbles tiredly. "I'm just thinking about... the Eiffel Tower."

"Huh?" He looks confused for a moment before he bursts out in cacophonous laughter. "You're in a club full of hot girls, a dozen has already hit on you, you have the whole night to yourself, yet you're thinking about some monument?"

He laughs quietly to himself when Bobby puts it that way. It sounds crazy. "But what do you know about it?"

"What do i know about what?"

"The Eiffel Tower."

"I swear you are the most random person i know." Bobby says as he downs the remains of Hanbin's drink. "I know that it's a monument, one that's way too ing high for my comfort. That it's in Paris, and the fact that Paris is a city that represents love. Like, really, that's all i know. But try asking me again when i'm sober." He finishes with a chuckle.

Love.

"Damn."

"Damn what?" Bobby stops laughing. He looks confused.

Rubbing his face with his palms, he sighs. "I ed up big time."

And suddenly Bobby stops laughing. "Hey, what's wrong? Tell me. I'll listen." He looks around. "But not here." He grabs Hanbin by the arm and drags him out the backdoor of the club. He slumps on the wall and slides down until he's sitting on the ground. Hanbin mimicks his actions.

"Now, tell me why you look like you've been dragged through hell since the last few hours." He grabs a cigarette and lights it, puffing out clouds and swirls of smoke. "To be honest, i thought that maybe since Mijun's leaving you'd want to spend the weekend with her, so i wasn't really planning on dragging you out tonight."

"So, why did you drag me out? And how did you-"

"She called. Said you weren't answering her calls, that something happened and you were probably having a hard time over-thinking and alone in your room; just basically how i found you. No one beats her psychic powers, man." He chuckles dryly.

"Yeah.." Hanbin trails off. He grabs Bobby's cigarette and takes a hit. "I'd been so dumb, Bobby. I thought that she was dense, and that i'd been the one suffocating all along. But i'd never been so ing wrong in my whole damn life."

"Are you talking about Mijun and your unwavering crush on her?" He puffs. "I had the feeling that it'd be about that. You couldn't even look at one girl in the eye, Hanbin. That's weird, even for you."

"Am i that obvious?" Hanbin chuckles lowly.

"Not really, but i was once your best friend too Hanbin. And some details still stick to the back of my mind. Like the fact that you don't smoke."

"You weren't my best friend, Bobby. You still are. I just love her, that's all." Hanbin sighs and looks up at the night sky.

Bobby smiles. "So, what's the big problem?"

"Mijun might be in love with me." He mumbles with eyes closed.

"." Bobby exclaims.

"Yeah. The clues were there all along, Bobby. I just didn't see it. She liked it when i called her cute nicknames. And i didn't even ponder why. She liked it when i'd say i was her boyfriend when guys would hit on her, and i never asked why. She even kissed me."

"."

"Yup."

Just then, the door opens and a head with droopy eyes peep out. "Bobby?"

"Here."

The figure steps out followed by two others. Jinhwan. Yunhyeong. Junhoe. "What are you two doing out here?

Bobby points to Hanbin. "Mijun problems." And Junhoe groans. "She's leaving, he's sulking, i'm observing."

Hanbin grimaces. "And you're not helping."

"Seriously, Hanbin, just forget her." It's Jinhwan who speaks up. "Maybe not forever, but just for tonight."

"Yeah, Jinhwan hyung's right. Come on, get up." He extends his hand to Hanbin and pulls him up, as Jinhwan does for Bobby. "We're gonna get in there and we're gonna party like crazy and get as drunk as we can. You won't even remember anything tomorrow."

Yunhyeong just silently supports Hanbin's weight by slinging his arms on Hanbin. He was the most sober out of them. "It'll be fine. You'll be okay." He mumbles to Hanbin.

Even if he doesn't believe a single word, Hanbin nods along.

And spends the next hour in strangers' arms.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

"Bobby?" He yanks his friend from the grasps of some girl with way too much make-up on.

"Hanbin! She was hot." He glares at him.

"Hot? My, you're way too drunk. You could probably peel the make-up off her face." Hanbin frowns. "Anyways, I'm heading home, you coming?"

"What's the time?"

He checks his phone. "1AM." And his gaze falls back to his wallpaper. It was a random selfie of he and Mijun, not much meaning behind it. But Mijun in the picture is kissing his cheeks. And he wonders what her thoughts might have been at the time.

"Dude, stop." Bobby says as he presses the power button and all of a sudden the screen goes black. Maybe that's gonna happen to their friendship too. Poof, and it all disappears.

"Whatever." He slips it back into his pocket. "Come on." He struggles with Bobby's weight suddenly on him.

"Bobby?"

"Bobby?"

"Kim Jiwon."

"You can't be serious."

"Please tell me you didn't pass out."

But the silence answers otherwise. Groaning with Bobby leaning on him, he hails a cab, throws Bobby in and heads home.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

"Hey, mom." He greets her as he approaches her.

"How's Bobby?"

"He puked just now. So, i'm guessing... hungover?" His mom cracks a smile.

"So, Mijun's leaving today?"

He just nods silently and gulps down a glass of water and some painkillers.

"What are you planning to do with your life, honey?"

"What do you mean, mom?" He looks dumb-founded.

"I know you declined to go because of me. What are you doing? Why throw that away if-"

"Mom, who told you?" She just keeps mum. He walks towards her and wraps his arms around her. "I'm not throwing away anything. This is home, mom. You're here, and I can't just leave home."

"But you can always come back, honey. Home is where the heart is, they say. I'm not forcing you into anything, whether it be leaving or staying; it's your decision. But you're gonna regret this, Hanbin. You're gonna regret losing her."

"I can't leave."

"Atleast ask her to stay." She looks up at her son.

"I can't mom."

"Why? I mean, you've been in love with her for so long."

"How did you-"

"I know everything." She just pecks his chin.

He buries his face into her shoulder. "I love her, mom. And that's exactly why i can't ask her to stay. I'm not in the position to do that."

"You are." She rubs soothing circles on his back. "You're her best friend. You have every right to ask her not to leave. And on top of that, you love her. She's not gonna find anyone else like you, and she knows that."

"She won't stay. And even if she did, one day she'll look back at her life and hate me for it."

"But she wants you to ask her to stay."

"No, she doesn't."

"She came last night, looking as wrecked as you are right now. She came to tell you that the flight was at 11am, and maybe more, but she left because you weren't here. I can see it in her eyes, honey. Trust me just this once." She pecks him and heads to the kitchen.

Hanbin mindlessly switches his phone on. First, he looks at the time. 10:05am. Then he goes through his gallery, full of random strangers. But what catches his attention is the message alert.

Mijun.

Don't let me leave.

And his mind stops functioning for a moment as his body automatically moves towards his room, and throws on whatever he can find to look somewhat decent. He doesn't reply to Bobby's 'Hanbin, what are you doing?' and simply rushes down the stairs after slipping on a pair of shoes.

"Mom, airport!" His scream echoes through the house.

10:09am.

The ride to the airport should be 40 minutes max. "Please, please, please." His mumbles form a mantra as he continuously fidgets in the cab.

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

"Hanbin." Mijun's mom exclaims.

"Where- where is-" He wheezes. The aftermath of mad running.

"She just took off." Her eyes look somewhat sympathetic. "She said you weren't coming."

Everything stops there. Suddenly, the whizzing murmurs and sounds of feet shuffling gets drowned out. The loud excited whines of children and the dials and beeps and the voice on the speakers seemed so distant. And he can hear the soft howl of the wind and the pitter patter of the slight drizzle.

11:04am.

And he'd never wished more for a flight delay in his whole life than he does now.

Dejectedly, he slumps on one of the chairs and mindlessly stares at the airplane slowly diminishing from his sight.

"See you again, Mijun."

| FIN |

 

---

A/N : But yes, there will be an epilogue. Stay tuned, and thanks for reading~