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Author's POV—

It was hard enough that she was overshadowed by her best friend, her twin, the better twin.

 

That's what she thinks anyway. Her twin was better in her studies, her twin was much more beautiful, her twin was more popular and her twin was more liked. 

 

She was just an extra. 

 

They were fraternal twins. Same height of 164 but everything else was different. While Ae Sook had a small face, dolls hazel eyes, slim figure and flawless skin, In Sook had chubby cheeks, normal brown eyes, a rather muscled body from Volleyball and she had a few pimple.

She sat on her desk, her gaze on the group of boys down at the basketball court, where a large group of girls sat by the side to watch them. The popular kingkas of their school. She scanned the crowd, not surprised to see Hwa Byeol Ae Sook there. Her more beautiful and adored twin. She was with her group of friends, smiling at the kingkas. She watched as a certain guy approached her, planting a chaste kiss on her cheeks before he continued playing with his friends.

A year.

In Sook has suffered for a year. She sighed, finishing up her test quickly as she took French, unlike Ae Sook, who completed her French course last year. The teacher took her paper when she passed it to the front, rushing out the door while jealous gazes were directed to her.

'She probably got help from Ae Sook.'

Oh how much she hated that line. So much. They always said that when she aces a test or finishes faster.

 

She went to her locker, placing her unnecessary books inside before she would head home. In Sook felt someone staring, making her turn around, only to see her other true friend, Joshua, who had just entered and was sweating. He rushed by her side, making his friends catcall at the two. They misunderstood the pair as 'dating' but unofficial. She rolled her eyes, closing her locker when he stopped by her side.

"I heard that Mingyu's going over.. You gonna be okay?" Joshua asked, watching her expression. She just gave a small smile.

He missed her. The old cheerful In Sook.

 

Flashback—

In Sook joked with her team in the bench before the games. The smile on her face lit up the tense atmosphere her team felt.

 

Pledis High had qualified for the finals for the Annual Volleyball Tournament. Her best friends, Seventeen and Ae Sook and her friends had came down to cheer on for the team, with the half the school. In Sook was the ace of their team, their leader, their guide. She was scouted by many clubs to play for her and was offered a place in the Youth Nationals Team. 

 

"GO IN SOOK!!" Ae Sook cheered with her friends when they saw the girl jump up for a spike, successfully scoring a point. The crowd from her school jumped and screamed in excitement as they were a point away from winning the Volleyball Competition. After so long of losing, when In Sook joined, everything changed. Just like how Volleyball changed her life, it was going to change it again today... 

 

She jumped, blocking the spike done from the opponent and it landed on the ground of their opponent.

 

It was silent for a moment until... 

 

'AND PLEDIS HIGH SCHOOL WINS THE ANNUAL VOLLEYBALL TOURNAMENT!!'

 

It took In Sook exactly 10 seconds to register what had been said and the team jumped for joy, running to their captain. Their beloved captain. She was carried on their shoulders while the trophy was given to her. She was crowned the official MVP of their game. She smiled brightly, looking around to find her twin, Ae Sook. The girl that was there with her through thick and thin. She got down from their shoulders, passing the trophy to their coach, who happily hugged her. 

 

"In Sook, this is Cha Hein. She's the coach of the Youth National Volleyball Team. She said she wants you to train with them!" Her coach, Coach Byeol, introduced and In Sook immediately bowed to her. The coach she has always looked up to. 

 

"Will you accept?" 

 

"I-I.... I'll contact you after I discuss with my parents!" In Sook bowed thankfully and her broad smile made the coach smile. The coach exchanged contacts with In Sook and she ran off to find her friends with the eye smile she was infamous for. 

 

"AE SOOK? JOSHUA? MINGYU?" she yelled.

 

Who knew how Volleyball had changed her life so much? 

 

The happiness that filled her was drained in a snap. The smile she had was gone. The glint in her eyes. Instead, tears filled up and her shoulder deflated. 

 

It was like a movie scene, while everyone cheered in slow motion, there she stood sad. She turned and briskly walked out of the Hall, rushing to the locker room. She wiped her tears, took a quick shower before her teammates would notice. She changed into her casual clothes, pulling her bag over her shoulder. She glanced back at the Hall where the celebration was still ongoing. 

 

She shook her head, scoffing. Of course, they only noticed her for her skills in Volleyball. 

 

She went out the doors, walking away slowly. 

 

The memory was fresh in her head. After that day, she quit the Volleyball team, she rejected training with the Youth National Volleyball Team and she avoided every single friends and Ae Sook. People viewed her as a conceit person. Ae Sook couldn't take it and confronted her. 

 

In Sook just laughed at Ae Sook, lying that she had injured herself and wanted to keep the burden to herself. 

 

Of course, Ae Sook brushed it off and believed her twin and launched into the story of how Mingyu and her were dating now. In Sook could still remember the pain in her heart when she saw the happiness in Ae Sook's eyes. Ae Sook had always placed herself first. 

 

Joshua saw through In Sook and since she knew English as well, they both began speaking in English when they were around Seventeen and their other friends. Joshua understood her more than anyone and became her best friend. 

 

"Well, what to do and just pretend, right Joshua oppa?" she chuckled, shaking her head. 

 

She thought, after a year of Mingyu and Ae Sook dating, she'd move on.

 

Oh how wrong she was. 

 

She was only hurt more. 

 

"Do you want me to come over?" Joshua gently grabbed her wrist but she pulled it off of her. 

 

"It's fine... You're going out with Seungcheol oppa and Wonwoo oppa right?" she asked and he shot her an apologetic look as Seungcheol came not too long later, pulling him away. 

 

"IN SOOKIE!!" her twin's voice could be heard and she felt an arm around her shoulders. 

 

"Ae Sook," she greeted, pulling the arm off.

 

"Let's go home!" she pulled her younger twin along to where Mingyu was waiting. 

 

"Babe," he smiled, kissing her forehead and she giggled, releasing In Sook. 

 

How much In Sook wished that was her.

 

 

 

But clearly, that isn't happening. 

 

The walk home was awkward. Mingyu and Ae Sook tried to include In Sook in their conversation but after three attempts with In Sook just nodding and her short replies, they gave up, being lost in their own world. 

 

In Sook walked from behind, sadly gazing at the couple. She felt miserable. The fact that she saw many couples around her was not helping at all. 

 

Ae Sook looked back at her twin, only to see that she was listening to her music. She sighed, turning back in front. 

 

"What's wrong, babe?" Mingyu questioned. 

 

"I-It's In Sook... She's locking herself away from me again and I can barely talk to her without her giving excuses," she gripped onto his hand tighter. He stopped walking, pulling the girl in his embrace.

 

"Don't be upset, love... She'll tell you when she wants... You're her twin. She'll come around eventually."

 

This only made In Sook's heart break more at the loving sight. She walked faster, away from the couple and towards their house. She couldn't call it home. Her parents showed plenty of love but it was clear who was favoured and she couldn't find comfort from her mother because she would only ask about Ae Sook or their elder siblings – two older brothers who also favoured Ae Sook. Her father was exactly the same. 

 

"I'm here." 

I'm home.
She longed to say those words but it didn't feel right. 

 

"Oh..." her mother acknowledged. 

 

"EOMMA! MINGYU IS HERE!" Ae Sook burst in behind her and their mother scurried out. So much different from the reaction she had gotten.

 

"Aigoo! Mingyu-ah," she hugged him. He laughed, hugging the elder. In Sook went up to her room, gently closing the door. She was not a rash type. 

 

The laughter downstairs, including her eldest brother, Junhong, made her sadden only more. How did this happen? Her family practically shunned her ever since she became more introvert and quitted Volleyball. They didn't even know she was offered a position in the Youth National Team. She just sighed, hoping for the day to be over. 

------------------------

In Sook was alone in school at 9 at night. Exactly 2 hours after official school closing time. She was in her gym clothes, spiking as many balls she could against the walls. It was a way to release her stress. 

Ae Sook is so much better. SLAM.

You're not worth any love. SLAM.

You have no one. SLAM.

She will always be No. 1. SLAM.

It's better without you. SLAM. 

 

She laid on the ground, panting slightly. 

 

"In Sook...?" a familiar voice reached her ears and she jumped up quickly, only to meet face to face with Mingyu. 

 

"Mingyu oppa..." her eyes widened, not expecting him here.

 

"W-what are you doing here?" she asked timidly, picking up the balls quickly. He scanned her attire. He knew she still loved Volleyball and she definitely did not injure her wrist and knee if she could jump-spike that many balls. 

 

"Why did you lie?" he asked, hurt. 

 

"I-I..." clogged up when she glanced up.

 

"Did you know how much Ae Sook worry for you? For your future? For your health?" he yelled at her and she flinched visibly. 

 

"You're so selfish! You only think about yourself! You-You don't even think about us! We're always worried about your passion after you quit! Gosh, how much I hate you right now!" he shouted straight at her face, only to have his breath hitch when he finally noticed what he said and the tears that ran down her cheeks. She turned away, storming out of the Hall after grabbing her bag.

 

"W-wait. In Sook!" he chased after her. She was gone quick and he went out of the school, seeing her nowhere. 

 

"IN SOOK!" he yelled, looking around.

 

BEEP BEEP! 

"NO."

 

Mingyu closed his eyes at the bright light, feeling himself fly but he felt no immense pain anywhere. He opened his eyes, seeing blood everywhere. 

 

"Oh my god. Kid, you okay?" a man came down from the huge truck but paled when he saw another victim. 

 

"Call 911..." Mingyu whispered.

 

"CALL 911!" he voiced out louder when the man made no movement. A crowd formed and gasps and whispers were heard. 

 

". In Sook stay with me!" he shook her but she was groaning. 

 

In Sook had hugged Mingyu at the last moment, the truck coming into contact with her and she flew, landing on back and head. Her head was bleeding while her legs limp. His clothes were soaked with blood. 

 

"Why did you do that?!" he cried, tears dripping onto her face as it trailed down his face. Her hand painfully reached up to wipe his tears.

 

"... A-Ae Sook needs you," she coughed out more blood. She tried to speak but her hand fell on her chest and her eyelids began dropping.

 

"No. No. DON'T CLOSE YOUR EYES."

 

The ambulance was taking a rather long. It was only after 10 minutes of Mingyu keeping her awake did the ambulance came. He was pulled away harshly so that the paramedics could attend to her. An oxygen mask made it's way around her face. They carried her in. 

 

"You coming in?" Mingyu stepped in, holding In Sook's hand. She couldn't take it anymore and closed her eyes. 

 

"PATIENT'S HEARTBEAT IS DROPPING," the medic yelled and they did some things to her, that could help her hold onto the last few minutes until they reached the hospital. As soon as the ambulance was parked, they pushed her to the Emergency Room. 

-----------------------

Ae Sook ran in the hospital with soaked cheeks while her siblings, Junhong and Junhyung, came with their mother. Their father would come later, being stuck in a meeting. Her eyes scanned the Emergency Hallway, seeing a dazed Mingyu, who had been attended for his minor injuries but he still wore his blood-soaked shirt. 

 

"MINGYU!" Ae Sook ran towards him, hugging him when he stood up to embrace her.

 

"W-What happened?" she cried. He told the incident but he didn't say what he had told In Sook, in favour of In Sook, who requested him before she went in the ER and her last few breaths. 

 

"I-I'm sorry," he choked out. In Sook's mother could only fall on the ground. She was praying that her baby wouldn't leave with the thought of an unloved family. 

 

"P-please save my baby," she muttered. Junhyung hugged his mother, tears threatening to fall. 

 

'CHARGE 100!' could be heard when a nurse ran out of the operation room, yelling for equipments they never heard of. 

 

3 hours was spent outside, waiting for the results. Their father came between the hours, patiently waiting. Though he showed the least affection, anyone could see how distressed he was.

 

The doctor came out, muttering silently to the nurses, who bowed, walking off. 

 

"Hwa Byeol In Sook?" he turned to the family, who immediately stood up. He brought them in his office, setting up the monitor for them for them to see.

 

"... I.. I'm really sorry. I tried to save her... but she only has a few days before her lungs will collapse and her heart will fail," he apologised, showing a picture of the bone that had caused the internal bleeding.

 

"No.. SAVE MY BABY GIRL!" Their mother screamed, tears pouring out of her eyes. Junhong and Junhyung held onto the thrashing woman. 

 

"I..I can't do anything more, ma'am. If I touch anything more, I might cause her death directly," he muttered, before bowing. 

 

"M-my twin..." Ae Sook sobbed. Mingyu could only feel guilty consuming him. They were brought in the room, where many wires were connected to her. 

 

"In Sook?" Ae Sook's soft voice broke the silence aside from beeping. 

 

"In Sookie..." she went by her bed, only to see a pale In Sook. 

 

"Oh my god... In Sook," she cried. 

 

"D-Don't cry," her hoarse voice made her wince but Ae Sook silenced her. 

 

"You know I'll always love all of you right?" In Sook could barely spit out those words to her family that sobbed. 

 

"In Sook-ah... forgive us," her family stuttered and In Sook could only smile slightly, nodding. 

 

"O-o.." 

 

Beeeeeeeeeeeeeep. 

"N-No. NO. IN SOOK-AH!" Ae Sook screamed along with her mother but they were held back by the many nurses that rushed in. The oxygen mask was pulled off and the wires were all pulled out from her. 

 

"Time of Death, 1.34am, Date of Death, 12/12/2014.'

 

"I BARELY GOT TIME WITH HER!" Ae Sook struggled but was pushed out. 

 

"I'm sorry for your loss, miss," the nurse muttered, closing the door. 

--------------------

Her funeral was rather tragic. Half the school had turned up at the funeral while Ae Sook stayed in front with her mother, sobbing. A picture of In Sook smiling, the last picture of her smiling two years ago was on display. 

 

Joshua took it the worse aside from Mingyu. Their friends could only watch. In Sook played a huge part in their lives before. She became their problem solver, their mood maker and their love adviser. Ae Sook now sat in In Sook's room. She saw many pictures of Seventeen, herself and the twins themselves. Many Volleyball trophies and medals were on display while her books stacked at one side. She scanned the room, sadly grazing the spine of the books. 

 

One particular book caught her eye. It was tattered, it looked old and rather messy.

 

'Can I be his reason to smile?'

 

She grabbed the book, sitting on her chair. It had a plain cover. She opened the thick book, only to see In Sook's neat handwriting. It had everything she had felt down there. 

 

'05/04/2013 

He came to every Volleyball game I had. He cheered me on when Ae Sook wasn't here. Aren't I blessed with such a best friend? A best friend I can never have? His smile, his stare, his laughter... It only motivates me to do better. 

Kim Min Gyu. 

I never knew how blessed I was until today..'

'07/04/2013

I told Ae Sook how I felt about Mingyu... She said to wait until the last game before I confess because I might not concentrate well in my other games if he does reject me... I hope not. He always treated me so well... I feel special around him. He gave me roses too... Everytime I won, so imagine how many bouquet I have? 18!'

'07/05/2013

Today, I became the MVP of my final Volleyball Tournament. Today, I was offered a position in the Youth National Volleyball Team. Today was the day I was supposed to confess to Mingyu. Exactly two years ago, my life took a turn for the better as I came out of my shell when I joined Volleyball. Look where Volleyball got me to... A broken heart. I thought maybe if I didn't join Volleyball... this wouldn't have happened. Maybe Ae Sook just couldn't tell me that she liked him and told me to confess later so she could build up the courage to confess... I'm happy I could help her find happiness... 

Am I willing to sacrifice mine for hers? 

Yes.'

'16/05/2013

Ae Sook didn't even noticed I lied about my injury. I'm okay. I'm not hurt physically. I'm hurt mentally. She didn't even notice how upset I was and how I lied to her... '

It ended there and Ae Sook noticed the wet patch on the paper. Her tears. 

How naive was Ae Sook? How stupid was Ae Sook? In Sook did so much for her... She snatched her happiness away from her and even rubbed it in her face. Every single day. 

A last page with no date was what made her read it.

'You know, I have a feeling Ae Sook will read this one day and I'll probably won't be there. Maybe I'll be on a trip or something-'

Ae Sook could just scoff. 

'-But if she does. Ae Sook, don't break up with Mingyu because of this. Your happiness and his happiness is my happiness. No matter what. I'll move on eventually and one day, both of us can laugh about this. Just remember, 

it's hard enough enduring the pain,

but it's hard enough to let him go for you. 

Be happy with him. I'll always love you. 

Much love,

Hwa Byeol In Sook.'

Her signature... 

Ae Sook could only hug the book while the hollowness from her other half being gone made her sob harder. 

"I won't, In Sook... For you. I love you too."