I'd say follow know when to use your heart and when to use your mind. What everyone should strive for is a balance. I'm hope your okay and I've made very bad decisions that I'm not proud of but listen to your mind right now. Start a clean slate and forgive yourself. Start new and don't look back. You've learned from your bad experiences. Stay strong and remember things could get worst but you have to be your old soldier and walk away with no strings attached. Best of luck to you.