Infinite - Can U Smile (Remake)

You didn’t catch any sleep that night as tears rolled down on your cheeks every time you thought about the boys, which was often. Slowly the sun rose and the morning came. Saga’s family asked many times if you should stay home and skip instead of going to school. You told them that you would be fine as long as Saga would be there also, and that you got something else to think about. Without realizing it, you blurted out that Himchan-oppa would scold you a lot for skipping.

With Saga’s hand attached to yours, you made your way to school. It felt as if everyone stared at you, after all yesterday TS had announced that even thought the girl wasn’t you, they thought it would be the best for yours, the groups and the fans sake that you would change host families.

You tried to keep your head up, but somehow your eyes were locked onto your shoes. Saga squeezed reassuring your hand as she eyed you worryingly. “Are you sure you don’t want to skip?” she whispered into your ear. You nodded, determined to make trough the first day. After all it wouldn’t become easier if you didn’t face it someday.

The worst part was still coming. Jongup and Zelo leaned against a wall close to the cafeteria, looking paler and more tired than ever before. They locked eyes with you, guilt flashing over you. Just the looks in their eyes was enough for you to break down.

“______!” Saga screamed after you. She began to go after you when Jongup ran past her. “I’ll take care of her!”

You ran, tears spilling from your eyes. Not caring where you would end up, you just let your feet take you wherever they wanted. Cold air hit your face as the tears continued to stream down on your face, down to your neck and collar. All you ever wanted was everything to be normal again – that you could return home after school back to that same old mess that the boys always somehow created.

After running of something that felt like seconds for you, your feet went under. You fell onto your knees on the cold ground, tears falling. Catching your breath, you looked around to find out where you had ended up. You found yourself in a big park without people. You stood up and walked with shaking legs onto a bench and sat down. Pulling your knees against your chest, you breathed in the autumn air.

*Winter’s coming, huh?* you thought. You had planned that you would spend this time curled up in the living room couch together with Daehyun, drinking cocoa and watching some movies or variety shows. A sigh escaped your lips.

“_______-ah!” a voice yelled behind you. You turned around and froze. As soon as he was close enough, Jongup pulled you into a big hug. His heavy breath hit your temple.

“Don’t ever run away like that, you hear me?!” he raised his voice, making sure that you would understand. Tears slipped out of your eyes – tears that you didn’t know you would be able to cry after so many others.

“I’m sorry.” you muttered, pulled him closer and cried into his chest.

---

After you calmed down, you just sat there with Jongup’s arm around your shoulders, both of you admiring the beauty of the newly built park that was decorated with multi-colored leaf’s that had landed onto the ground.

“Are they treating you good?” he asked, gaze still fixed forward. You looked at him, nodding. “They are. I’m really thankful for them to take me instead of letting me go to a random person who lives in Busan.” you half-joked, even thought you were curious to see how Busan was and looked like.

He sighed deeply. “Look…“ he begun. “We all miss you – a lot. And it hasn’t even been 24 hours. Daehyun-hyung is the worst. He didn’t sleep at all yesterday; he just complained that it was all his fault and that he shouldn’t have let you go even thought he chased after your car and all.”

You stared at him, shocked. “He did what?” you asked, still not believing what you heard. Jongup struggled, not really amused by his hyung’s actions.

“He chased the car but eventually gave up. Look, what I’m trying to say is that we all miss you more than we should, but we still respect your decision to change families for our images sake. It’s going to be hard, but we will survive somehow.” he added, eyes locked with yours.

You melted by his words. All he stated was fact, yet it both warmed and cooled your heart. It was amazing how understanding they were, even though they wanted to keep you with them.

You darted your gaze away from him. “I see. I’m really thankful for you guys for letting me stay with you for these months, even thought I wished it to last longer. I can’t thank you enough.” A tear rolled down on your cheek again as you thought about how much you had grown to love them in such a short time.