"Taemin!" Jonghyun beams at me, waving one arm over his head excitedly, like a dog wagging its tail. He runs his way toward me, stepping on the green grass and into the small meadow of flowers, where in the center I stood. I try to smile, but helplessly, I fail, my hand raising up instincitvely so my finger can softly brush the necklace around my neck, the pendant so cold that it makes me feel nostalgic, like it was a small part of Minho that he had left with me. 

"It's been awhile!" Jonghyun says as soon as he gets close to me, and he awkwardly extends a hand for a shake, but I don't touch him, afraid that he'd give me warmth. After all, he was the boy of Summer, and his aura was so bright and warm and I could almost see it extending toward me, I was assuming he was very warm. But I didn't want warmth, I wanted Minho. 

I nod. "A few centuries or so." I ignore my voice, so weak and crackly, accurately reflecting my vulnerableness. 

He laughs softly, and nods, before he looks at me. We just look each other in complete silence, and I take in how he looks so happy, so warm and so satisfied. His eyes curving in moon-like ways as he grins widely, flashing his perfectly white teeth. His hair is yellow at the tips, and the rest of it fades to a light brown, and frankly, he looks handsome. His clothes look exactly like mine, an all-white outfit made in smooth silk. 

"So how are you?" he suddenly asks, and I blink, just realizing that I was dazing off. 

"Good," I lie, but he believes me, which only proves how long we haven't seen each other. 

"And what about the Winter guy? Minho, right?" And that is when I freeze, feeling my heart clench and my stomach tie into a very tight, complicated knot. I choke back the tears and comfort myself by brushing the pendant some more, trying to get as much feeling of it as I could. When I don't reply, Jonghyun notices my discomfort, and he steps toward me and reaches for my arm, but I step back, cautious of his warmth. 

"Hey, are you okay?" There was panic in his voice. 

"H-he's completely fine. I mean, well, I don't exactly know where he is because he just sort of disappeared last year and I don't think he's coming back. But he should be fine, I mean, I think he's completely fine, right?" I stammer, my mouth spilling too much, too quickly and I struggle to stop myself, but my mind has completely broken down. Jonghyun frowns, as if he understood what I was going through, when he knew absolutely nothing. 

He reaches for me again, but I'm faster than him, and before I could stop myself, I find myself sputtering things I should have kept to myself. "And then this guy just shows up and presents himself as Minho's replacement, as if nothing is wrong. And of course, something is wrong—everything is wrong!" My arms flail around in a way that makes me look so frustrated and angry, but Jonghyun only watches me, allows me to let it all out, and I realize that I'm crying. 

"I love him, but he just disappears into thin air. Literally!" 

Jonghyun sighs and smiles comfortingly, before he motions for me to sit down. I lower myself onto the soft grass and bury my face in my hands, sighing and sobbing. Jonghyun reaches toward me again and I assumed he was trying to comfort me, but I stop him, and he puts on this sad expression that I couldn't help but quickly say: 

"Just don't touch me. Trust me, it will make me feel better."

He retreats his hand and nods understandingly, yet I don't miss that hint of confusion in his eyes. I try to smile reassuringly, and even though Jonghyun smiles back, I know that I failed. I take a moment to study him again. After all, it's been centuries since the last time we've met. I find that he's exactly as I remember him: bright, handsome, friendly. 

"So, how's Kibum?" I ask after a long moment of silence, clearing my throat because my voice sounded very raw. 

"He's great, wonderful," he repies, smiling in a way that made his eyes smile, too. I envy him for his happiness, wishing that I could be as happy as he. But I realize, happiness is nothing when you have no one to share it with, remembering the times I held Minho's hand, sharing my warmth. 

I nod slowly, biting my lip as I choke back the tears, and he grins at me, apparently not noticing. We just sit there for a moment, staring at each other with wonder and curiosity, and I know he wants to ask a million questions, the same way I do. But we both don't have the courage to, afraid that we would tug at the sensitive heartstrings. And then I feel myself wrapped in dull warmth, a wonderful feeling that seemed so distant yet tempting, it was frustrating because I couldn't get a strong hold of it. 

That was when I knew I was leaving, because I felt myself fading, my energy's connection to the Earth disappearing, as if a rope that's about to snap cut. And Jonghyun is just staring at me with a sad smile, and I try to smile back, failing again. My eyes fall shut and I take one last breath, before I feel myself getting lost. 

When I open my eyes, I am up in the clouds again, lying lazily on it's soft texture. I stand up and brush the probably non-existent dirt off my clothes, just because I don't feel like sleeping yet. Despite how exhausted I am of crying and screaming and wishing. I start to walk aimlessly, my feet getting buried in the soft, cottony clouds in light hues of pink and yellow. 

"Welcome back," I hear the voice say, and I jump in surprise. 

"H-hi.." 

"How was it?" he, she, it asks. 

"Could've been better," I lie, when the truth is, my time on Earth was horrible, terrifying, devastating. 

The voice doesn't reply, and I continue to walk slowly, head hanging low as I watch my feet appear and disappear under the clouds with every step I took. I don't know how long I was walking, but I raise my head, realizing that by now, the voice should've put me to sleep already. I guess it had forgotten about me, and I wonder if there were more of us out there for it to take care of, invisible to my eyes. 

And just when I part my lips to speak, I squint, noticing that there was something far away on the clouds, propped on it's soft, cottony textures, waiting for me to go pick it up. So I run to it, my heart sinking back to the Earth when I realize what it is, recognizing the shape, the texture, the colors, the picture. The painting of me, gazing out the window with the crystal crown on my head, the perfect contrast to my yellow hair. My lost lover not failing to copy the distance in my eyes that stood out perfectly from my pale yet bright complexion. 

A painful reminder of Minho, who I would probably never see again. My knees failing me and giving up, laying me next to the rectangular canvas as my arms snake around it, eyes shutting tight, wanting to run away from all of this. Curling up as the screaming once again begins. 

Yet after the long moment of my screaming and crying and begging, I realize again that I'm still not asleep, and thinking, maybe I'm meant to stay awake and to wait. But for what? 

So I just lay there, my chest heaving as I hiccup, waiting for something but not exactly knowing what. Waiting, waiting for a very long time. Until finally, finally I hear the voice, loud and clear, "I am truly sorry, Taemin." 

I open my eyes, squinting at the brightness, realizing after a moment what the apology is about. "So you know about it?" 

"Of course, I do," it replies slowly, as if with hesitance. 

"So you have something to do with it," I mumble, a little angrily. 

It does not reply for a moment, choosing to ignore my question as it says, "Everything happens for a reason." 

"And is yours reasonable enough to take him away from me?" I answer far too quickly, blowing my cover of appearing to seem calm and composed, turning out to be angry and... a mess. 

"He was never meant to be here in the first place." 

I'm silent for a long moment, angry at that statement, remembering how he had said it, wondering what in could possibly mean. I sit up and glare at the nothingness above me, assuming that the voice was watching over me from up there. "Tell me how you would react if you were me right now." 

"I would be angry, of course. I think it is rather heartbreaking when someone you deeply care for disappears." I gasp, surprised that it has emotions, some evidence that it's not what I think it is, it's not some kind of authority that knows all, it is something that might be like me, but given a different power, a different reason. While I bring Spring, and Minho used to bring Winter, and Jonghyun brings Summer and Kibum does Autumn, the voice brings all four of us to Earth and to sleep. 

"Then bring him back," I whisper, feeling tears sting my eyes, my vision going blurry as my finger brushes my necklace again. 

"I am afraid I cannot do that..." 

I feel my eyebrows knit together in confusion, but I shake my head and opt to saying, "At least tell me where he is." 

"He is where he came from, where he belongs." 

"And where is that?" 

"Where you bring Spring, and Jonghyun brings Summer, and Kibum brings Autumn, he is now one of those who watches those changes you bring in a different perspective." 

And just as I'm about to ask what that meant, I collapse back onto the clouds, falling into a deep sleep.