Chapter 3: Hurt

15 years old...

Seungyeon’s POV

I was standing at front gate, waiting for Seungyoon and Donghae Oppa as we had promised to go home together. This was usually our routine, “who has finished class first, has to wait for others.” I was finished early, so it was my turn to wait for them. While waiting, I hummed my favourite song, Confession, singing by Hot Potato where the singer is Kim C, former MC of Two Days One Night. Suddenly I felt my shoulder was softly tapped by someone, making me startled and immediately stopped humming. I turned back to know who. That person waved at me.

“Hi, Seungyeon! What are you doing here? Don’t tell me that you’re waiting for Donghae Oppa,” Gyuri, my BFF smirked, had a hidden meaning behind it.

“And Seungyoon,” I added and gave her a smile.

‘Gyuri is my best friend besides Donghae Oppa and she’s also my classmate. She is the only person that knows my love feeling toward Donghae Oppa. I never tell her about that until one day she admitted that she could see it through my reaction and facial expression every time Donghae Oppa’s around me. Is it too obvious? If it did, why does Donghae Oppa not say anything?’

“Seungyeon-ah, how long do you want to endure your feeling? I think you better tell him before he goes for someone else. Don’t be shy, just tell him the truth, tell him that you loved him,” Gyuri said and grabbed both of my hands. She patted them softly, trying to make me calm like she knew that I was so nervous and worried.

“But... But what if he... he doesn’t like me like I do? Do you think he’ll accept my love? And the worst thing is when he won’t be my friend anymore. It... It’s so awkward, Gyuri-ah,” I said, worried if my words were true. She shook her head, trying to deny all those claims.

“Seungyeon, you’ve to trust yourself. He won’t know what you feel unless you tell him by yourself,” Gyuri convinced me. I slowly nodded my head, slightly agree with her.

‘You’re right, Gyuri but I’m scared. I’m willing to have him as my best friend rather than losing him.’

“Gyuri, I’ve known Donghae Oppa for long time, since we were kids. I don’t think I am his type. He prefers a girl like Seungyoon and I notice that he’s always treating, caring Seungyoon much different than me. Very different,” I said while looking down, not so confident.

Gyuri lifted up my chin, making me looked straight at her.

“Seungyeon, what if he also has the same feeling as yours? May be he treats Seungyoon just like his sister. Who knows, right?” Gyuri convinced me again.

 “Seungyeon-ah,” someone suddenly called out my name, making Gyuri and I stopped chatting and looked at that person. It was Donghae Oppa. My heart started to beat faster as he came closer to us, or to be exact toward my direction. Every his step made me nervous yet happy at the same time.

“Donghae Oppa. Why are you alone? Where is Seungyoon?” I tried to act calm. I looked at Gyuri but she just secretly winked at me. I mouthed “what” to her but she grinned much wider, happy seeing me uneasy around Donghae Oppa. I can feel my palms sweating.

“I purposely didn’t wait for her because I’ve something to tell you,” he grinned. He seemed shy. He then glanced at Gyuri, like giving a signal to her to leave them alone for a while.

“Ah, I’ve to go now because I’ve to accompany my mom to shopping mall today,” Gyuri excused and hugged me.

“All the best, Seungyeon. He might be wanted to confess his “love” to you. Congratulations, my friend. I’m happy for you,” she whispered softly at my right ear. Her words making me felt hot and I could tell my face was so red right now. Gyuri then left while waving at us.

‘Oh, God, please deliver Gyuri’s words become true. What a nice day if he really does. I must be the luckiest girl in this world if it does truly happen.’

“Seungyeon, are you okay?” Donghae asked me while shaking my shoulder. I quickly woke up from my own thought and looked at him shyly.

“No... Nothing. I’m totally alright,” I stuttered, feeling embarrassed by myself.

“What do you want to tell me just now?” I asked him calmly yet really can’t wait what actually he was trying to say to me.

“Seungyeon, I hope you wouldn’t be too surprised. This is really important to me and may you...,” he paused. I could feel that he was really nervous as he played with his own fingers.

‘Just say it, Donghae Oppa. May I what? Be your girlfriend? I really do, Donghae Oppa.’

“What?” I asked him softly, trying to calm him even myself feeling nervous too.

“May you... help me?” he finally said.

“Help?” I asked him back, confused.

“I liked Seungyoon since I first met you both. I then realised that I can’t see her as my sister like I see you. I want her to be my girlfriend but I don’t know how. I know only you can help me, shall you?” he asked me again and looked straight into my eyes. I was speechless after hearing his confession.

‘Why my heart feels so hurt? This is actually my fault, not him. I can’t put the blame on him. He’s right. I shouldn’t put high hope on him and I should know who I am. Seungyoon is much better than me and of course he will choose her.’

I tried to hold back my tears even my eyes started to feel hot.

“You liked Seungyoon? Wow, this is really surprising me! Of course I will help you, Donghae Oppa. You’re the only boy best friend I’ve ever had and as a sister, of course I want to see my twin sister happy with someone who really loves her. I’m glad that person is you, Oppa, I sincerely said.

Donghae Oppa was smiling much wider after hearing my words. He then hugged me tightly.

“Thanks Seungyeon. I know I can depend on you. You’re really a good sister to me,” he thanked me and kissed my left cheek. I was surprised and touched my cheek.

‘You break my heart yet you treat the wound with your genuine kiss. I’ll always remember this moment, Donghae Oppa even you’re not mine. At least you still consider me as your sister. It’s just an enough for me.’

“Unnie, Donghae Oppa, sorry I’m late. Let’s go home now. Ah, I forgot! May you both please accompany me to stationary shop? I’ve something to buy,” Seungyoon who came from nowhere suddenly appear in front of us.

“Seungyoon, may you go with Donghae Oppa? I suddenly remember that I’ve left something in the class. I perhaps take a long time,” I tried to make an excuse.

“Don’t worry, we’ll wait for you here,” Seungyoon refused.

“Seungyoon, the shop will be closing soon. Just go with Donghae Oppa, okay? Don’t worry about me. See you at home later,” I persuaded her. She finally agreed and walked away with Donghae Oppa. I just saw them from the back. Donghae Oppa then turned his head back and looked at me. He mouthed ‘thank you’ at me while smiling. I just nodded my head, understood.

‘They look nice together from here. Donghae Oppa, this is my first help for you.’

I could feel my tears started falling down as Seungyoon and Donghae Oppa were walking farther, leaving me.