"Do you know it's my birthday today?" He said with a sad smile before staring to my eyes, "Thank you for coming...to my life though you're already too late." He said.

"It's your birthday?" I asked him, my heart felt his pain.

He just smiled at me, "I already gave up, but you came." He said leaning forward slowly to me. Just like in a movie, everything turned into a slow motion and he kissed me.

My eyes snapped open wide but I didn’t let go. I kissed him back and now I can really call myself...crazy.

I didn’t know what I was thinking at that time. All I knew was that I lost my mind and I’ve gone completely insane for kissing him back. But the weird thing is that I didn’t feel any regrets doing that. 

He smiled at me after our kiss, “I will get better for you. Please wait for me and trust me, okay?”

I nodded my head and smiled back at him, “I will wait for that. I trust you.” 

~~

I couldn’t sleep at that night thinking of Donghae and the craziness I have done. 

I had mixed of emotions and I felt so guilty at the same time. I should’ve been more professional, I don’t know what has gotten to me.
 

Seriously, Dara? He is your patient! 

I suddenly remember what Jaejoong told me. I should’ve listened to him. I should’ve stayed away. I was probably just felt sorry for him and I let that emotions took over me. This is why i should’ve just stayed on pediatrics unit. I should’ve just taken care of small babies not mentally ill person like him.

An image of Donghae slowly leaning towards me flashes back in my mind and my heart started pounding so fast. I shook my head to erase that thought. I hit my head several times.

I convinced myself to think about Jaejoong instead. The prince that I have been dreaming of ever since we were kid.

I should get my head straight back and make sure from now onwards, I will only think about Jaejoong and a way how to make him fall for me so I can get rid of that Jessica in the picture. 

I came to work the next morning feeling tired and nervous at the same time. I have decided to tell Donghae that last night when I kissed him back was a mistake...but I would promise him that I will be his good friend instead. I’m afraid he would have an outburst again but I have to tell him that so he wouldn’t expect more from me and also to remove the guilt in my chest.

“Is everything okay, Dara?” Jaejoong asked me during his rounds when he noticed me spacing out from my desk. 

“Yes, Dr. Kim. Everything is good so far.” I told him. He smiled back at me before he continued walking down the hallway with a clipboard in his hand.

“Dara, have you heard the news?! Dr. Kim is getting married soon. I really thought you and him are a thing. At least I hope one of us would marry him.” Chaerin said with a sad pouty lips while fixing her narcotic medications. I turned my chair to face her with my eyes wide open. “Huh? Where did you get that gossip from?” I asked her with my doubtful expression.

“Dr. Jung is showing off her engagement ring to everybody. She’s very proud of it. Who wouldn't be anyway?! I would do the same thing if I were the one to get married to Dr. Kim. * Sigh*" Chaerin let out a heavy sigh before she continues,

"Wait, I thought you and Dr. Kim are childhood friend? He didn’t tell you that?” She said whispering to me.
I shook my head and turned to my desktop computer again,  trying to process in my head what she just told me.

I saw Jaejoong talking to one of the nurses while passing by the nursing station. My head couldn't function much and I just called him like it was an emergency and asked him if he has some time to talk to me. Jaejoong looked at me confused and with his worried expression. He excused himself to the other nurse and we both went to the back by the exit to talk. He swiped his I.D and opened the exit door. I went inside first and he followed me.

“Is there something wrong, Dara?” Jaejoong asked me.

“Are you really getting married?!" I asked him.

He looked at me and let out a sigh of relief. He then gave me a sweet smile. “About that, I was going to invite you for a dinner tonight. Jessica and I were actually planning to tell you that later. I guess the news spread so fast. I was really about to tell you first about that last night but I couldn’t contact you.”

“Are you sure about her?” I asked him, my heart suddenly sank from pain and disappointment.

“What do you mean? Of course. I've been thinking about this since last year actually. I think I found the girl I wanted to be with for the rest of my life. It’s a good timing that you’re also here to witness that, Dara.” He told me with his sincere eyes. He looked so happy while telling me those words and the excruciating pain in my heart was just too much to handle. I need more than just analgesic for this. I need the whole bottle of tequila and vodka in addition to morphine and dilaudid to numb this pain.

“Ahhh...since last year? Really? Then, I’m so happy for you, Jae. I told him while trying to stop the tears that was about to fall in my eyes. I couldn't speak anymore or else he would see me cry and it would be awkward. I was so stupid to think that he would think of me as more than friends.

An overhead page was heard all over the unit, “Dr. Kim! Please call extension 105.” 
 

I was saved by that paged from embarrassment.

“I’ll talk to you later, Dara. I have to call them.” Jaejoong said before he left. 

Fountain of tears started to fall from my eyes. This place that i thought would be my fairytale world turned out to be a nightmare instead.

~~

I went to room 305 when I found out that they transferred Donghae back to his room. He gave me a smile as soon as I walked into his room. He noticed my eyes are puffy and red. “Are you okay?” Donghae asked me.

“Yeah. This is your med—“ I was talking when he suddenly cut me off by pressing his lips against mine. I was taken a back. I was about to tell him not to do that and the ‘it was a mistake’ speech that I kept on practicing last night but I couldn’t find my voice all of a sudden. I couldn’t even get mad at him when I saw him smiling cheerfully to me. 

“Cheer up, my nurse Dara! Is it because of that evil witch again?” He asked me with a wink

“Wow..." I said to him with my lip curved to the side. This guy must be a psychic too. I continued saying, "Looks like you’re in a good mood now.” I said biting my lips while trying to curse myself inside my head for not saying the "break up" speech that I practiced last night for him. 

“Yes, because I promise you i will get better for you, remember? As soon as I get discharge here, let’s forget all of this and reset everything about us. Let’s pretend you didn’t know me and I would re-introduce myself properly to you while having coffee at a nice restaurant. Deal?” He said smiling shyly while gesturing what he imagined.

I smiled at him while imagining what he told me. “That sounds good.” I told him, my problem suddenly disappeared and I felt somehow better after talking to him. Yeah, I totally lost my insanity.

~~

“What is your favorite color?” 

“Blue and black. You?”

“Pink and red. What’s your nickname?”

“Fish and you?”

“Fish? That’s funny. They call me rabbit because I looked like one.” I said gesturing like a rabbit and he laughed. “What your favorite movie?”

“ Titanic and The Notebook”

“Woah, that’s my favorite! You’re just copying me.”

“No, that’s really my favorite. Me and my fiancé... i mean ex fiancée, we watched those several times.” Donghae said, his eyes suddenly became sad.

“Oh.” I said as I got another vial while drawing his blood. I bit my lower lip when I saw his sad expression. “It’s done!” I removed the tourniquet from his upper arm before I looked into his eyes. “I’m sorry.” I told him

He shook his head and smiled back at me. "For what? Nothing to sorry about." He replied.

“If you don’t mind, I want to know what happened on that night” I asked him not trying to think. I was really curious what happened to them and I can still feel the sadness in his eyes.

He looked down sadly and let out  a heavy sigh.

“But if you’re not ready yet, forget about it. I will wait.” I told him. “You did great today.” I said while gently caressing his face like what I do to the small babies that was in my pediatric unit before.

He looked at me and gave me a smile.

"Stop treating me like a baby." He said smirking before kissing my lips.

~~

“Good morning, nurse Dara. You have a flower delivery!” Ms Bom told me with curiosity in her eyes as she handed me a bouquet of flowers.

“Huh? Are you sure it’s from me, Ms Bom?” I asked her and looked at the card. 

————————————

To: Nurse Dara

From: Fish

Stay beautiful and gorgeous

Like always. Cheer up!

————————————

"Fish?" I couldn’t help but to smile giddily when I read the card. How did he manage to do this?

“Yahhh... who gave that to you Dara?” Chaerin asked

“An admirer? Kyaaah!” Minzy teases

“Dara unnie, I didn’t know you already moved on from Dr. Kim so fast. I'm still crying every night ever since I heard the news that he is getting married. I’m so happy for you! Who is this lucky guy?" Lee hi added, teasing me

“Yah..stop it, guys. It’s nothing.” I said to them but I couldn’t stop smiling as I smelled the flowers.

“That’s a very nice flowers, Dara.” Jessica said as they passed the nursing station while doing their rounds. Jaejoong was walking next to her and the two nurses and a Psychologist were following behind them.

“Thanks.” I told her biting my lower lip shyly. My glance landed on Jaejoong who was also looking at me. He gave me a cold smile before he looked down reading his clipboard out loud as they continued doing their rounds.

~~

I walked into room 305 excitedly. I closed the door and saw him on his bed playing with his iphone.

“Good morning! Mr. Annoying a.k.a Mr. Fish.” I greeted him. He put his phone down and sat up on his bed before he smiled at me. “Good morning, good mood today?” He asked

“Yeah.. how did you do that? It's from you, right? I received the flowers. It’s beautiful. Thank you.” I told him smiling

“Is there someone else in your mind that would send you flowers from a named Fish?" Donghae teases, "I’m glad you like it. I ordered it online. I asked my social worker to give my phone back since I’m doing better. She agreed but she said she would watch me closely so you need to be careful not to get caught." He added teasing

“Yah... You’re really something, Mr. Lee. Don't do something bad to me and just behave! Why me?! Tsk! Anyway, you're probably a player before. You know how to make the girls flattered. I’m sure your ex always have headaches from you.” I teases him. I slowly realized what I had just said and covered my mouth. “Joke.” I kept on forgetting about not mentioning his ex at all. 

He diverted his eyes while smiling sadly. “You’re right. She really had been through a lot because of me.”

I let out a heavy sigh while cursing myself inside my head, “Cheer up, Mr. Fish.” I consoled him. I went closer to him to pat his back when he suddenly hunched over on his bed while holding his head. “Ouch!” He screamed in pain.

“Are you okay? Where does it hurt? Is it your head? What kind of pain? How much pain do you have?” I asked him, panicking. 

He looked at me with his pain expression and pointed to his head. “My head hurts.”

I gently massaged the part of his head where he pointed it hurt. I told him I will get his medication when he suddenly pulled me closer to him making me lay down on top of him. He hugged me tight and told me, “You’re my medication that I need, I just need a kiss.” he said smiling while staring at me.

“Yah! You scared me, MR. LEE DONGHAE! Don’t do that again!” I told him with my annoyed expression as I tried to release myself from his arm.

“But my head really hurts.” he said with grimace in his facial expression.

“Does it really hurt?” 

“Yeah. It hurts here. Just kiss this please?” He said pouting.

“Okay.” I told him with a sigh before I kissed his forehead. “Here too.” He pointed to his temple left and right asking for more kiss. 

I smiled and kissed his left and right temple.

 Donghae then pointed to his lips. “This too.”

“Yah! You’re too much already.” I said to him both of us staring at each other.  He propped up his head and kissed me gently while I was on top of him. He smiled at me after he pulled his lips off me and said, “I feel much better already. You should be a doctor instead.” 

 I smiled at him and kissed him again. “Should i be your private doctor?” I wrapped my arms around his neck and he pulled me closer to deepen our kiss.

A sudden knocked from his door made me jumped off the bed in panic. My heart almost jumped out from my chest too. “Dara? Are you inside?” Chaerin said.

“Yeah.. I’m here!” I answered. “I’ll be back.” I told Donghae before I rushed to the door to open it.

“Are you okay? You’re face is so red.” She told me.

“I’m fine. I was giving him his pain medication.” I said nervously.

“Oh. Okay. Dr. Kim is looking for you.” She said.

“Okay. I’ll go there in a minute. Thanks.” I told her. 

Chaerin peeked to look inside the door and saw Donghae playing with his phone. “Wow, the famous 305 looks so much handsome in person. He looks so much better now.” She said whispering to my ear.

“Yah, he might hear you. Let’s go.” I told her. “Mr. Lee, I’ll be back later! Are you feeling better now?” I asked him and he just gave me a smile and a wink. Chaerin smiled giddily while looking at us. I gave him an annoyed expression before I pulled Chaerin outside.

“Let’s go.” I said to Chaerin pulling her away from that room.

~~~

I took a deep breath before I entered Jaejoong’s office. “Doc, do you need me?” I asked Jaejoong politely. Awkwardness is obvious between us ever since he told me about his upcoming marriage to Jessica.

“Dara, sit down first. Do you want some coffee or tea or me?” He offered, teasing. He laughed awkwardly. I didn't find it funny at all.

“No, I’m fine. Thanks.” I told him with an awkward smile.

“Okay. Um... I’m worried about you, Dara. You seems very distant lately. Is everything okay?” He asked worriedly

“Yes, Dr. Kim. Thank you.”

“Hmm.." He pretended to scan his office with his eyes. "I think we are just the two in here, right? Just dropped that title of respect. It’s really awkward, nurse Dara. Are you sure you're not mad at me?" He teases 

I looked at him and see him with a sweet smile. His brown eyes staring at me made me feel more awkward and uncomfortable. I don’t understand why I’m feeling like this. Suddenly, my childhood friend and my long time crush in front of me makes my heart feels heavy. I somehow felt different around him. Maybe because i still felt weird knowing he is going to get married soon. It is my defense mechanism to stop my heart to feel the pain so much. 

I just smiled back at him before I said, “Okay, Jae and of course I'm not mad. Why would I?"

“That's great! By the way, there is an opening to the pediatric unit for a nurse. I spoke to the director and I recommended you. I know you really miss taking care of the babies instead of the patients here. You have been really brave, Dara. I really admire you for that.” Jaejoong told me that and it breaks my heart even more.

He said he is admiring me for being...what? brave? Yeah right. I don’t need that admiration. Why don’t he just tell that to Jessica since she’s now his fiancé.
 

He is such a jerk. He is not thinking that those words may cause the people to misunderstand him, especially when he is talking to the girl that has been admiring him ever since we were kids. He is very kind to everyone and unfortunately, I was one of that everyone. I was one of the victim of his kindness and I fell for him. I wish I could tell him that.

“It’s okay, Jae. I already like my job here. Thank you anyway.” I said with a sad smile.

“Oh, I see..but in case you change your mind, just let me know, okay? I really want you to take that. By the way, Jessica wants you to be one of her bridesmaids.” 

Bridesmaid?! Seriously Jessica?!!! She’s really a witch. She wants to torture me so much. 

“I would love to but I don’t think I can even make it to your wedding.” I said with sarcasm.

“What? But why? Don’t say that, Dara. I will get really upset with you.” Jaejoong said in reply. “Are you that busy because of your admirer who sent you flowers earlier? You haven't told me anything about that lucky guy. I'm upset."

Tsk! Upset? Why does he have to know? He doesn't care about me anyway.

“No, it's not that. It’s just...I’m just not sure about my schedule yet. I’ll try to greet you both in person. I promise. Don’t worry about me. You know I always support you no matter what. You’re always be my best friend no matter what.” I told him and gave him a sincere smile.

~~

The next day...

“Dara! Have you met your new patient in room 302? I heard he is very young. Maybe he is in his early 20’s. I heard he has OCD and borderline personality. You’re side is really getting harder.” Minzy told me after our morning meeting.

“Yeah, I saw him in the report. What is borderline personality again?” I asked her. I really have to brush up my psychiatric textbooks.

“A person with borderline personality disorder is identified by emotionality, attention-seeking and self-centredness. They are very impulsive and manipulative. They are almost the same as psychopath and narcissistic people. Be careful when you talk to him. Don’t get too close just like in room 305.” Minzy worriedly said in reply.

~~

“Are you okay, nurse rabbit?” Donghae asked me when I was preparing for his medication. He probably noticed I was spacing out.

“Yeah. *sigh*”

“I don’t think you’re okay. I told you I’m not a kid. Don't treat me like one. What is bothering you? Tell me about it.”

“Wow... yes nurse, Fish. You're not a kid. I'm so proud of you." I said to him like I was talking to a kid, teasing him. "I’m just a little nervous because I have a new patient. I heard he has borderline personality and OCD. They said he is very manipulative and attention seeker.” I told him with a sigh

“Oh? Just gave him his medication quick and get out of his room as soon as you are done with him. I heard those people are good with lying and manipulating people to get what they want. Just be careful and don’t let your guard down. Just don’t be gullible.” Donghae said while staring at me as I come to give all his medications.

“Hmm... gullible? I’m not gullible. Cheee! 

If that is the case then I should be careful from you too because your very good at manipulating me.” I said teasing him. 

“What did you say? Am I manipulating you?” He said smirking while pulling my waist down making me sit on his lap.

“Yah... this is very wrong. If some might see us like this, I will be fired on an instant.”

“I think you should quit this job, nurse dararabbit.” Donghae suddenly said hugging my back.

“Huh?” I asked him taken aback

“This job is very scary. I don’t think this job fits you..”

“You don’t want me to become your nurse anymore?” I asked him pouting.

“I want to of course...I want to be with you all the time but I think your personality doesn’t really fit the mental hospital. Besides, as soon as I get discharge here, I won’t let you work here anyway. I just don’t want to. You told me you were a pediatric nurse before you came here, right? Why don’t you apply for that position?” He asked me. I suddenly remember what Jaejoong asked me earlier.

“That’s funny. Jaejoong told me he recommended me to the pediatric unit director. He said there’s an opening there right now.”

“Oh...Really? I heard from other nurses he is getting married to the y doctor. Is that the reason why are you so down lately?” 

“Yah! Of course not! And F.Y.I! That doctor is not y at all. She’s an evil witch. I’m sure she just had a liposuction. Tsk! You’re like an old grandma who loves gossips.”

“Liposuction? You’re the one making the gossip like those other nurses.”

“Yah! Why are you defending her?! Do you like her too?! Then just marry her too!” I told him with my very annoyed expression. I was trying to get up freeing myself from his hug but he wont let me go instead he tightened his arms around me more.

“I like you more.” He said. “Don’t get jealous now, Darabbit. I’m just joking.” He teases while kissing my neck

“Yah! I’m not jealous! Why are you so full of yourself?! You probably have borderline too.” 

“What’s borderline? Anyway, just grab the opportunity that Jaejoong is offering you. I hate missing you but I feel like you are unsafe here. I promise you, I will get better each day so I can be with you in real world.”

“Promise?” I asked him with my pinky in the air. I leaned back on his shoulder feeling more relax.

“I promise.” He said smiling, intertwining his pinky against mine before we pressed our lips together.

~~

“Good morning! My name is Sandara Park, I’m your nurse from now on. May I know your name and date of birth for identification please?” I greeted the patient in room 302.

“Hi, nurse Sandara!" He said waving at me while sitting on his bed. "My name is Chanyeol Park. My birthday is on November 27, 1992. It’s nice to meet you.” He politely greeted me.

Wow, is this really the new patient they were gossiping about? He looks like an angel and he very polite unlike the first time I encountered Donghae.

I don’t think he would be a problem.

“I heard those people are good with lying and manipulating people to get what they want. Just be careful and don’t let your guard down. Just don’t be gullible.” Donghae’s words kept repeating over and over my head. 

“It’s nice to meet you too, Mr. Park. Let me prepare your medication."

“Just call me Chanyeol. I feel very old if you call me Mr. Park,” he said. “We have the same last name too, did you notice that? It’s not gonna be hard if we get married since we have the same last name.” He said with a playful laugh. “Joke. I’m just trying to lighten the mood.” He added when he noticed that I was uncomfortable.

“Ha ha ha.. here’s your medications.” I told him awkwardly while giving his medication.

“By any chance, do you know the patient in room 305? Of course you know him. You’re a nurse here. Why did I even ask? Haha” He asked all of a sudden but then he answered his own question as well. Yeah, he is weird.

“Huh? Why did you ask? Do you know him?” I asked him curiously 

“Nothing much. I just happen to know him..like very well.” He said with a smirk.