I’m tired of pretending - pretending not to monitor her performances, when I do; not to know her songs, when I do; not to notice her, when I do;   It’s the things I needed to do to protect her, more than myself.   On my shoulders, I will always carry the lives of my members.   Much had to be done, and much had to be sacrificed.   And the years have passed by like this -    Me, immersed in finding ways to lift us u