LU HAN

Am I really going to do this? I asked myself as the elevator door opened. I went inside and stared at the elevator numbers for a second. I guess I am, I decided before pressing the button for Kris’ floor.

As I watched the floor number counter descend, I couldn’t help think back to yesterday. Now that she came clean about her secret, everything made sense. Why Jieun and I couldn’t find anything about her background. Because she basically hadn’t existed. The more I thought about it, the more my heart ached for her. I hated her family who abandoned her even though she didn’t seem to be harboring the same feelings, thought it might have to do with the fact that she couldn’t remember anything.

I also realized why she didn’t like socializing with others and why we would often find her in secluded places. She didn’t want to be seen nor heard, literally. She needed to keep a low profile. I wanted to strangle myself when I remembered the times that she had been trying to distance herself from us, from me, when it was just the first week of school. How selfish was I to want to be her audition partner when all it could have brought her was unnecessary attention from the students. Kris even knew about it.

I sighed. Kris.

Kris likes her, I had realized then. And I didn’t have to wonder why. I could even guess how Kris started to like her. She was refreshing; she didn’t need Kris’ popularity or his connections. Kris hated people who only wanted something from him, and she wasn’t that. Which is why I have to do this.

She means something to Kris probably as much as she means to me. I can’t risk our friendship over this, not even for the girl I like. Because Kris means just as much.

I sighed, realizing I had already reached his door.

KRIS

A knock on the door halted my fingers from pressing the next set of keys on the piano. The rooms were pretty much soundproof so I didn't need to worry about disturbing someone. But then, who would come to see me as early as... I glanced above to see that it was still... seven. In the morning. On a Monday.

Her? My mind suggested.

I scoffed at myself. Really, Kris?

I stood up and walked to the door, chiding myself. But then, it wasn't like I wasn't thinking about her just moments ago when I was playing the piano, just before the knock came.

I opened it, finding myself face to face with a grinning Lu Han.

I scowled. "Oh, it's just you."

I thought I saw something flashed in his eyes before he grinned even brighter and marched himself inside my room. "Good morning to you, too, Kris," he said as he took a quick scan over my room. "Oooh, feeling inspired lately?"

I took a step back. "What?" I hated how my voice sounded like I was caught at doing something I shouldn't.

He gestured towards the stack of half-filled music sheets on the piano. "You're composing. Aren't you usually just playing?" He said with a teasing smile.

I ignored his stupid look and went to the couch. "Now what are you really doing here?"

"After a gazillion times of coming to your room unannounced, I thought you'd be used to it by now." He continued walking around the room.

"Not this early." He did often come around to visit and just bother me. This just wasn’t his time of the day.

He laughed. "I'm recruiting."

"Recruiting?"

"For the second level of the audition. It's a group audition." He started examining the picture frames on the wall.

"I don't know, I'll think about it," I said, though we both know I was joking.

He laughed again. "I'd like to see you try, Kris. That'd be something to see. You, hanging out with another crowd."

"Ha-ha," I deadpanned. "Now if you're done, my door is waiting for you."

"You never were the best host to treat a guest," he said to me. And then, instead of walking towards the door as I would have hoped, he went to collapse on my bed, face first.

"Hey! Go back to your room if you want to sleep."

"I don't know, I kinda like it here." He buried himself deeper into the sheets.

"Very funny, Lu Han." I walked towards him and kicked the bed. "Get out."

He was still for a couple of seconds before he spoke. "Hey, Kris?" His joking tone had flipped a hundred eighty degrees.

"What?" I snapped, contemplating whether to kick the bed again.

"When did you know?" he asked, his voice suddenly low. His face was still buried in the sheets.

"Know what?" The guy was acting strange.

Lu Han was uncharacteristically silent for a moment. "That you like her."

I took a step back, my ears not believing what I just heard. "What are you talking about?"

"You can try to lie, Kris, like always. But you know we'll see right through you. I'll see right through you."

He already knew? I just found out recently and he already knew. My heart started beating erratically when I suddenly thought of her. Aish, focus Kris.

I kicked the bed again. “How did you know?” I should have seen this coming. Lu Han noticed things about me that I wasn't even aware of. I sighed; there was no point in lying.

“I just did. The symptoms were pretty much the same.” Symptoms?

"Well fine, I do like her," I admitted, "at least I think I do." You think? My mind scoffed. You’re being kind to yourself, Kris. You know you like her.

"Then what do you plan to do?" Lu Han asked.

I shrugged but realized he couldn't see me. He still hadn't moved an inch. "I don't know. Do I need to do something?"

"So you're not planning on telling her? That you like her?" he probed.

"Are you serious? Of course not." Just thinking about it made my guts churn. "I'm sure this feeling will pass." In your dreams, Kris, my mind added.

"So you won't pursue her then?" he went on.