FOR HIRE: CRYING MAN

A DK x You Fanfic

FANART AND STORY WONU WON ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

A/N: Mianhe for my 'not-so-good' fanart cover. I couldn't draw realistic tears huhuhu. Maybe I'll do better next time.

Happy reading.

---

ALL HUMANS CRY AND THE MALE SPECIES IS NOT AN EXCEPTION.

"FOR HIRE: MALE PROFESSIONAL MOURNER."

Often, people hire CRYING LADIES to mourn over the deceased.

Typically, it was just females they hire.

However, in this time of the world, where gender isn't a thing anymore. The world drastically changed.

Gender equality in jobs.

You can now see men doing manicure and pedicure jobs while women are found as carpenters, welders and construction workers working in the streets.

Weird jobs have emerged into something weirder.

'Male Professional Mourners'

You sipped the saliva dripping from your mouth and looked at those thirteen gorgeously full-grown men grieving over a coffin.

They have been the talk-of-the-town ever since they started their job.

It was the first time in forever you witness how 'professional crying men' do their job in a burial wake.

Professional mourners A.K.A. Moriologist.

Yes, that thing exists.

They were actors hired by a concern citizen or a family member to increased attendance on a burial wake especially when the dead has little or no living relatives to grieve over their funeral.

On some cultures, they say that expression of grieve over a funeral is a way to ease and comfort a mournful soul.

The more people crying over the grave, the better.

"Those thirteen men is really doing a great job." You whispered to yourself, wondering how much they earn from doing such a job.

You looked around and saw a lot of people. Perhaps some were relatives that flew from far away, some were complete strangers.

You belong to the latter.

"I am not even quite sure whether they are here for the free funeral food or to hit on the thirteen greek-god-like crying men." You muttered.

But admit it or not, you are no different from those people. 

You went here for both reasons;  free foods and to drool over those crying men.

You don't even know who on earth is the girl on the coffin.

You stared at those men as you daydream and stuffed some tasteless-extremely-sugarless-and sodiumless funeral biscuits inside your mouth.

Who knew you would be crossing paths with them at this mournful funeral?

Among those thirteen handsome men, your eyes were suddenly glued to the weirdest one.

You often see his face plastered on posters of funerary services, telling people that they have this thing called 'Professional Male Mourners'.

It's quite weird and kind of unique, but who cares?

They're company must be having its peaked sales.

Even if he does nothing, his face alone can attract a lot of customers.

Who wouldn't fall for his charm?

Sharp and high nose bridge, bright eyes, red lips.

A dark and evident mole on his left cheek just accentuated his 'bright-as-the-sunshine' type of charm.

All of a sudden, you saw him sneakily pulled out a bottle filled with small crabs underneath his chair.

Bewildered you watched and anticipated his next move.

"Is it his good-luck charm?" You muttered pertaining to the glass bottle filled with crabs.

You gasped in disbelief the moment he secretly slid one of the crabs inside his shirt!

You blinked once.

You blinked twice.

You blinked thrice.

"AAAAAAAAAAH!" He yelled in his perfectly high-pitch angelic manly voice. Almost good as those musical actors in an opera.

The crab pinched his s!

Now all eyes are on him.

With that, he started wailing and punching the coffin hard.

"How could you leave me like this?" He wailed and bury his head in the coffin as if he was truly one of the bereaved.

Nice acting and tactics.

"It hurts- aaaaaah!" He yelled while holding on his chest.

But reality is, he was just trying to pull out the crab that is currently ripping his s apart.

You giggled and laughed on your seat.

"So this is how they do their job." You muttered in between your laughs.

You were supposed to cry over the burial but here you are, dying, laughing your out.

Just to remind you, this is a burial wake, not a comedy bar.

The people turned their heads on your table.

You immediately shut your mouth closed and bit your lips.

Fear was written all over their faces.

"Is it a bad omen to laugh at a funeral?" You asked awkwardly.

Instead of responding, the people just stared at you.

Moments later, they started whispering towards each other.

"I...I really came here not just for free foods neither to see those crying men. Hehehhe." You awkwardly and stupidly defended yourself.

"I...I am here to grieve over my good old friend." You lied.

"I just laughed because I remembered a funny memory with her." You continued explaining.

But people just kept on staring at your direction.

Despite of the sunglasses they all wearing, you can still feel how their eyes are darted on you.

Still, fear was written all over their faces.

'Did I really made a huge mistake laughing in a funeral?' You whispered inside your head.

You immediately stood up and went over the coffin to grieve and ask for the dead's forgiveness.

But the minute you faced the coffin-

Your eyes widened in disbelief!

Your jaw dropped.

Mouth half-open, you stared at the girl lying on the coffin!

You knew her.

You knew that face.

That familiar face you saw everyday in the mirror!

"I...is it me? Or am I looking at my reflection?" You whispered.

The handsome guy with a crab-bitten immediately put his head up.

He heard you.

Your eyes met.

Astounded, he stared at you with his wide eyes.

He pointed his index finger at you and covered his mouth using his other hand.

His stares quickly shifted from you back to the girl lying on the coffin and vice versa.

"I SEE A GHOST!" He screamed as he formed his arms into a cross to expel out evil spirits.

He dropped on the floor as he stared at you with fear.

"Hey, I'm alive." You explained.

"See, I can touc-"

Before you could even touch him, he dashed out of the funeral, screaming like a retarded seal.

You went around and tried to talk to people.

"I am alive. This must be a mistake. Maybe it was my long lost twin who died." You tried making out the most logical reason you can think of even though you don't truly have a twin.

The people around you just continued whispering to each other as they looked around.

"Do you hear that?" 

"We all heard a laugh a while ago, but when we turned our heads...."

"The voice belongs to no one..."

You waved your hand in front of their eyes but to no avail-

NO ONE SEES YOU.

You were invisible to their eyes!

The whispers became louder and clearer to you.

"A...am I dead?" You muttered in shock!

All of a sudden, the weird crying man came back, still the same, squealing like a retarded seal.

"I saw her again! Outsayyyyyyyyyyd!" He cried.

A few moments later, a stunning woman entered the door.

Your eyes grew even bigger!

The woman removed her black elegantly gorgeous shades.

The weird guy pointed at you, to the coffin and back to the lady on the door.

The guy gasped.

You did the same!

You, the one on the coffin, and the lady on the door...

You all look exactly the same!

'What in the olly molly mother of clones is happening right now?' You muttered inside your head.

You all look the same, except for the fact that the lady on the door looks a little older.

You don't really believe in doppelgangers, but now you do!

People can clearly see the lady on the door while you remain invisible to their eyes!

"Run." The guy squealed.

The lady that looked like you walked in.

Fear devoured the crowd. All of them started running away!

The funeral turned into an absolute chaos!

Unbothered, the lady just continue walking in as if it was her red-carpeted runway.

In just a split second, the crowd emptied the venue.

The weird handsome guy was the last one to run away but you held him and halted him back.

You quickly pulled him under the table and hid yourselves.

He is the only one who sees you.

You covered his loud screaming mouth.

It's quite fascinating that a ghost like you can hold and touch nothing but the guy beside you.

You shut him up as you watch the lady in full black slowly walked to the coffin.

She was wearing a sophisticated knee-length lacy black dress, expensive see-through black hand gloves and black pointed stiletto.

The huge diamond stud on her necklace glittered.

It was like seeing yourself in an expensive and exquisite parallel universe.

She was the exact opposite of the cheap life you have lived.

Even the sound of her footsteps sounded like money coming out from a cash register.

The lady delicately caressed the coffin and stared at the deceased maiden who looks exactly just like her-- just like you.

"I'm sorry twin sis."

You heard the lady apologizing in front of the coffin.

"You needed to die for your own good."

You gasped again in disbelief.

You were just joking about having a twin sister but now that joke suddenly came to life.

How funny.

You almost wheezed your lungs out. Really, really funny.

"So... am I really dead?" You asked the guy shivering in fear beside you.

You tried recalling what happened and why on earth did you just die, but you remembered nothing!

You were just sleeping on your small and scrappy makeshift house yesternight, you woke up to sell your home made street foods early in the morning, and then you passed by a random funeral and attended it just to grabbed some free food to ease your hunger...

And viola!

Now, you are the mysterious subject of the bereavement.

How you wished that this was all just a prank, but it was all real!

The lady placed a thorny red rose on top of your coffin as she swore her last words.

"Please rest in piece."

It was supposed to be peace, but she really meant it as piece.

She wants to torment your soul and ripped it into tiny pieces until your whole existence perished.

"Rest in piece" was meant to be a curse, synonymous to the phrase 'may your soul be ripped in pieces'.

The hear-say legends says that it is a curse that haunts the dead even at the after life.

You closed your fist tight as you saw the lady that looks like you smirked like an evil - you mean witch- you mean both.

She's an evil 'Bwitch'!

Anger devoured your soul as you gritted your teeth tight!

"Let me have your body." You asked the guy beside you.

The guy crossed his arms around his chest just like a lady who was about to be .

"I'm a professional MOURNER not a professional MOAN-ER"

"Know the difference."

He spoke giving emphasis to the word 'Mourn' and 'Moan'.

You blinked once.

You blinked twice.

You blink thrice.

You stared at him, dumbfounded by his humorous speech.

'Is he joking in this serious scene?' You thought inside your head.

He was handsome yet stupidly humorous.

Before you could even possess the guy's body, the evil 'Bwitch' had already left the vicinity.

You went out under the table and tried to run after the lady, but she was already gone!

"Damn it! I lost her!" You angrily muttered while throwing your tightened fist into the air!

"Ouch!" The weird guy winced in pain.

He suddenly appeared in front of you and your fist accidentally landed on his beautiful face!

"Yah! You should have let me borrow your body!"

Instead of saying sorry, you took your anger out on him.

"I told you I am a professional MOURNER not a professional MOAN-ER." He told you for the second time around.

"You can hire a different guy for that." 

Yes, he's dead-drop gorgeous but only when he's not opening his stupid mouth.

"I'm not talking about 'that' stuff for goodness sake! I am asking you to lend me your body!"

You tried explaining to him but he just folded his arms around his muscular chest as if you are asking him to do 'that thing' only married couple do.

"I mean, I am a ghost, let me possess your body." You explained to him for the third time around.

"You are a ghost?" He asked with his pupils quickly dilating.

You are not even sure anymore whether he's amazed, shocked or scared.

"I mean, yes I do thought you were a  ghost at first, but upon hearing her calling the girl on the coffin her twin sis, that is when I thought you were just triplets killing each other, fighting to be your family's one and only heiress." He explained.

You blinked quadruple times.

He has a point tho.

You don't remember how you died.

What if you are really triplets and they were really your twin sisters?

You looked up in your cloud of thoughts and think hard.

You can't seem to find the right equation and solution to your crisis.

It's vague and confusing.

'But the crowd can't see me, except for this weird guy.' You thought while looking at him from head to toe.

"That's what the drama on TV looks like, so I thought-" He paused halfway through.

He gasped with his wide eyes.

He covered his opened mouth with his hand.

"Y...you're a real ghost?" Realization finally hit him.

He immediately distanced himself a meter away from you.

"Am I?" You stuttered in confusion.

Slowly, the guy approached you as he carefully pressed his index finger on your squishy cheeks.

"Waaaaaah!" He screamed and ran to the wall.

He put up his arms up and vigorously wiped his hand against the cemented wall!

"I touch a ghost!" He manly squealed!

"I can touch a ghost?"

In just a flash, his expression shifted from panic to confusion.

He looked at you from head to toe.

Out of nowhere, he just held your shoulder and swayed you back and forth!

"Stop it!" You yelled at him.

"You're the only person who can see me." You uttered.

His shocked expression went shocker! You are not even sure if that's a word but no other adjectives can describe his shocked face better than this.

"What's your name?" You asked him.

"S...seokmin." he stuttered.

"Okay Shookt-min." You uttered his name incorrectly.

You held onto his shoulders tight.

"I need your help." You firmly spoke.

"I want to know the reason behind my death." You told him straight to the point.

"Please..." You held his hand as you begged and practically cried in front of him.

Seokmin, being the soft hearted guy that he is, slowly nodded his head.

"Alright I'll help you."

You looked up to him and gave him your cutest slash puppiest eyes.

"Does that mean that you are allowing me to use your body once in a while?" You asked him.

Three seconds of silence came in.

He just stared at you with his mouth zipped.

Then he did it again!

He crossed his muscular arms on his toned chest and uttered his infamous line.

"I told you I am a professional MOUR-"

You pressed your index finger against his lips to shut him up.

"You're a professional moaner, I get it." You told him.

"MOURNER NOT MOANER!" He replied in his irritated tone.

"Clean your ears. I said mourner not moaner. You heard it all wrong!" You defended.

You rolled your eyes and ended the conversation about - you mean mourning.

"I mean, if it's okay to you, let me possess your body just once." You asked him.

"Don't worry, I'm not a bad witch, I won't do anything bad. I will just possess your body to talk to her just once." You explained.

"Aaah is that so? That's what you meant about 'using my body'"

He scratched his nape and laughed awkwardly.

You sighed hard. You've explained it to him a couple of times already.

"Alright. I'll help you." He finally agreed.

"But do me a favor too" He bargained.

"Call. Tell me what you want in return."

"Pay me for my service." He told you.

"I accept cash only."

"I barely earn enough being a mourner in burial wakes. I need more cash to support my needs."

He scratched his nape again and looked down.

"B..but if you don't have cash, hmm..."

He looked up and thought of another way for you to pay for his service.

You can't even tell if he is being shy or shameless for asking something in return.

"Alright I'll give you everything I've earn in my entire years of living. I am dead anyway and have no family, so you can have all my money, just help me with this.

"Okay let's write a deal." He agreed.

"Uh, before that...c...could you do something about your-"

You pointed on the small crab protruding underneath his white shirt.

"Oohh that-"

"Could you pull them out for me?" He asked.

Without a warning, he just pulled his shirt up in front of you!

His cherry-tomato-colored s welcomed your eyes!

His chest is swelling red with the thug-like crab just clinging on his s like a boss wearing its shadiest sun glasses!

You grimaced and sighed hard.

Carefully, you tried your best to pull the crab out from his s.

From this moment on, your journey with the 'Crying man' began.

You need to work together to find the truth about your death.

---

One week!

It took you a whole week to find where that evil woman lives.

Your stupidness combined together formed a great team. A really, really great team.

Bold and daring-- that was the plan.

Just plain burglary with a spice of stupidity.

He was wearing your old stockings on his head to cover his whole face.

"Why don't you just sneak in yourself? Nobody sees you except me." He complained.

"I can't hold things. I couldn't bring the evidences to the police if I did." You mouthed to him.

"Go ahead! I'll be on look out!" You told Seokmin as you pushed him to the front gate of a huge house.

Seokmin just sighed and reluctantly did his job.

"I'm sorry I did this!" He screamed while bowing his head repeatedly to apologize.

In just a flash, he grabbed the huge pebbles on the ground and started throwing it into the cctv cameras.

"Chop chop!" You mouthed to him while hiding behind a bush.

You pulled out your arms and made a karate move with your hand.

"Hey!" The guard finally woke up.

The guard yelled while pointing at him.

"Chop! Chooop!" You whispered louder.

Realization hit him as his mouth formed a round circle.

"Oooh! A chop chop!" He finally get what you mean!

In just a whim, he straightened out his palms like a real kung fu master.

"Hiyaah!" He screamed as he chop the side of his flexed palm onto the guard's back neck!

"Neck chopped!" He screamed!

With that, you and Seokmin recklessly entered her home.

It was bold and daring of you!

"Where do you think you're going?"

A deafening silence came.

You stood frozen on your position.

Chills automatically ran down your spine.

A revolver was already pointed on your head.

You heard your own voice talking behind your back.

You put your arms up and slowly turned your back.

Seokmin did the same.

There, you saw the evil woman who looks exactly just like you.

The woman gasped upon seeing your face.

She slowly put her gun down.

"Y...you can see me?" You asked bewildered.

"M...mid ?" She stuttered completely ignoring your question.

Mid ?

All of a sudden, the lady dropped her gun and hugged you tight.

You were frozen for the second time around, standing in pure confusion while your stupid partner is rolling on the floor, holding his stomach, laughing his out.

"Mid ! Hahahahaha!" He laughed aloud.

"It's true were ." The lady tried to explain.

Seokmin paused for a while, but after a few seconds, he burst out laughing. Again.

"Our family name is ." She uttered in a annoyed tone.

"My name is First. First ." She introduced herself.

Seokmin stopped laughing.

"And she is who?" He asked.

"Mid ." The lady answered.

"And the girl who just died is?"

"Last ." She plainly replied.

"We are the triplets."

You and Seokmin blinked once.

You blinked twice.

You blinked thrice.

Again, the joke about you having twin sisters came to life.

"And thank God I finally found you! I've been looking for you all those years!" The lady exclaimed

With that the lady hugged you again.

"Wait hold up, what in the world is happening right now?" You asked.

Something isn't right here. It's quite odd and disturbing.

You quickly pulled yourself away.

"Tell me how did you kill the girl on the coffin?" You crooked your eyebrows and asked her straight to the point.

The woman blinked twice in disbelief.

"Excuse me?" Flabbergasted, she asked.

"I didn't kill her."

"Liar! We saw you how you cursed her on her coffin!" Seokmin finally stood up and spoke with sense.

"I didn't!" She defended.

Tears started forming on her eyes.

Silence echoed.

All of a sudden she kneeled on the floor, crying her heart out.

"She begged me!" She yelled.

"She begged me to end up her life!" She confessed.

"I...I was her doctor." He started explaining.

"She's suffering from a lung cancer and as her sister, it hurts me everytime I see her crying in pain, trying to survive all the therapy we are giving her."

"W...we want her to stay longer and live longer... but..." She cried and sniffed her snot.

"S...she came to me one day, crying, grieving in pain... But despite all that, she still smiled at me...telling me her one last wish..."

"I..it was mercy killing. She begged me." She spoke while burying her head on the ground, bowing for forgiveness.

"So... I...I wasn't the girl on the coffin?" You asked.

You can't believe you just accused an innocent woman as a murderer. Not to mention, she is your sister.

"So... I'm...not dead?"

You were about to help her stand up and apologize for your mistake but then-

The cunning woman immediately grabbed her gun on the floor and pointed it towards you.

"Maybe not now, but later...you will be." She answered your question.

"You're next on the coffin." She smirked.

Seokmin quickly pulled you behind his back and shielded you with his wide open arms.

Chin up, chest out, stomach in, straight back, he bravely face the gun's muzzle.

The woman devilishly laugh.

"How do you like my story-telling-a-lie?" She asked.

"Yes I killed the girl on the coffin!" She finally confessed the truth.

"I must be the one and only heiress of this family."

You dropped your jaw as you scoffed in disbelief!

'Am I really a ghost now having a real face to face conversation with the Queen of the underworld?' You thought to yourself.

'Or am I still alive?'

"Consider yourself lucky for you still lived up to this point." She spoke.

'So I am alive?' You murmered inside your thoughts.

"I...if I am not dead then why does the people from the funeral not see me?" You asked.

The woman laughed. "How foolish of you!"

"Oh right!" Seokmin just snapped out as if he remembered something fascinating.

"Hahahahaha! Are we plain stupid or what?" He uttered.

"Excuse you? Are you talking just about yourself?" You counter-attacked him.

"The people who attended the funeral are all blind, that is why they can't see you!" Seokmin blurted out.

"Why are you blurting that out just now?!" You asked completely annoyed.

"They all ran because I told them to run. I see it now, I was the cause of ruckus at the funeral."

Seokmin stupidly uttered not knowing that the deceased was an active donor of the Blind Foundation and all of her friends who attended the funeral were beneficiaries of the foundation.

"Shut it up!" The woman pointed her gun closer to Seokmin's forehead.

But Seokmin didn't even flinched.

He suddenly became manly and braver in your eyes, completely the opposite of how you heard him squealing and freaking over a fake ghost.

"Killing people for your own greed will not earn you a crown and a throne." Seokmin courageously stood his ground.

"Who will hail the queen if you already shot all your men to death?"

"I was born and raised like a knight in this modern world."

Seokmin uttered his long speech.

"And today, I just found 'my true queen.'"

Seokmin stared at you for a while after uttering those last three words.

'Why is he suddenly talking about knights and queens?' You muttered.

Nevertheless, your heart skipped a beat as soon as his eyes met yours.

Caught of guard, the 'Bwitch' immediately took this opportunity to pull you towards her direction!

The woman locked you in her arms as he pointed her gun on your right temple!

With that, you screamed.

Tears started running down from your eyes.

You felt the cold end of the gun touching your temple.

You shivered in cold sweat.

"You shouldn't have been born in the first place!" The woman yelled as she gripped her arm tightly around your neck!

"I regretted giving birth to the both of you!"

Astounded. Bewildered. Flabbergasted. Shocked.

Those words are not enough to describe how shocked you were.

"Y...your...my..." You stuttered.

"Don't even dare call me your mother! It's disgusting!" The woman who turned out to be your mother shut you up.

Coming from , her words just struck you like lightning of a thousand bolts.

It was extremely excruciating to hear those words, especially when those hurtful words came out straight from your mother's mouth.

"If it wasn't because of you two, my husband would not have killed himself!"

Large beads of tears raced down from your eyes.

You can't help it but to cry and be vulnerable.

You remembered all those times you yearned for your lost mother.

You wish for her to live a long life while she wish for your death in return.

"He killed himself after knowing I was and impregnated by his own father!"

Seokmin suddenly face the lady with his fist tightly clenched in anger.

"So? How did it became your daughters' fault?" He mocked her.

Out of the blue, you were left in shock when he high kicked her gun off her hands!

You screamed and cried at the same time!

Seokmin's bright eyes suddenly turned dark.

The sunshine aura he is giving off suddenly turned into storm.

He was panting in anger.

He quickly pulled you in his arms as he pointed the gun at the evilest woman in front of you.

Devoured by the extreme anger, Seokmin slowly pulled the trigger with his trembling hands!

You closed your eyes tight and covered your ears.

You screamed.

BANG!

A loud gunshot echoed throughout the neighborhood!

Trembling, you dropped on your knees as you hold your chest tight.

Your mother laid down on the floor, unconscious!

He immediately went to your mom and check her vitals.

"Don't worry. I did not shot her to death." He seriously told you.

He was not the usual Seokmin you knew from before.

"Thank goodness she just passed out from shock not from a heart attack." Seokmin heaved a sigh.

You looked around and saw a hole in the roof.

He shot the gun upwards.

"I have all the evidence." He spoke as he pull out the recorder inside his pocket.

Guess he wasn't as stupid as you think.

"Do you still want to press charges against your own mother?" He asked out of concern.

Still shocked of what happened, you just stared blankly at the wall.

You wanted to cry more but you were already left with no tears to cry.

And it hurts even more.

All of a sudden you felt his warm arms slowly wrapping around your body.

It was the warmest embrace you have ever received.

"If ever you're in pain and you have no tears left to cry, hire me, for free."

"I'll be your crying man."

"Let me be your professional MOURNER not MOANER kind of guy."

And with that just one simple line, your sadness drastically dropped down as your happy hormones is increased by 2%.

You weakly smiled at him.

"I think I like the latter better." You joked around as you tried your best to smile.

Out of the blue, Seokmin just hugged you tighter in his arms.

He stared at you dearly with his eyes.

And without a warning,

He leaned forward...

The next thing you knew-

You felt his soft lips on your forehead.

Your heart skipped a beat as your world slowly turned into a full stop.

"Let me be you're crying man." He uttered.

"Give me your pain and let me cry it all out for you."

END.