hi....It's been a while since I updated....I am sorry for this. TThank you for giving this love....My skills are getting bad and bad....but I hope I did convey the true feelings and message. I hope you all like this. I cried writing this though....i don't know why... anyway enjoy.

When Jihoon reached his writing class the next day he couldn't find Seungcheol, his friend wasn't even responding to his calls. He was worried but he had to take class for his grades, and it only happen once two weeks so he did.

The class was already full and there was no empty bench for him. He had three shots with sharing the seat with someone, one was some tall creepy guy while the other was a girl waiting for her friend to occupy the seat beside her so his last option was Yoon Jeonghan. One day won't hurt, beside Jeonghan hates Seungcheol not him, well he didn't know but he can always try. So he walked towards the seat. 

"Um can I sit here?" he asked softly. Jeonghan looked at him and then with out any expression he just wave his hand, like he didn't care much. 

 Okay off to a good good start. 

Jihoon was really curious about Jeonghan's personality, and he hoped he would be able to see it today. Even if it's small part. He sat there, taking out his note book and pencil case and the he opened his mobile again, still no message or call from Seungcheol. 

"Where is he?" he mumbled under his breath. 

"If you are talking about Seungcheol then he is at his mother's grave, it's her death anniversary." Jeonghan said casually going through his own mobile.

Jihoon raised his brow and before he could ask Jeonghan continued. 

"Don't ask me how I know, I have been living with this bastard for ten years already. I know everything" 

"Then shouldn't you be going there too?" 

"Me and my family go at the evening, aunt Choi was really a good person so yes I do go there every year. Just not at the same time as Seungcheol. Might as well have two more Graves if send us together." Jeonghan was still scrolling though his feed. 

Jihoon didn't say anything after that, the fact that Seungcheol had no mother was a surprise and he didn't even knew about the news. He didn't push the talk further as teacher was already there. To his surprise Jeonghan was really attentive in class, taking notes and marking things in book. More or less Jihoon was impressed. 

"How is your project going?" 

Jihoon didn't know but he asked, there was still time before the class was over and the teacher was now helping the student giving the answers to their questions. 

"The writing one?" 

To his surprise he got a decent answer. 

"Yes."

"I'm almost done." 

"wow, I only have to write songs and I'm only half done." literature students wrote stories, at least of 20k worth of words while music students were given task to write at least 5 song lyrics. 

"well you have to write five songs on different topics, that's really hard you know." 

"I guess it is, but your work is not that easy either. I'm kind of surprised." 

"Maybe I just got my inspiration checked." Jeonghan shrugged as he packed his back. 

"You know you are not that...." Jihoon trailed off when they were leaving. 

"Bad?" Jeonghan finished his sentence and Jihoon blushed. 

"I mean....." 

"I don't know what you all take me for I'm a decent human being." 

"But you and Seungcheol always fight." 

 "Is Seungcheol not a good person?" Jeonghan asked him. 

"He is.." 

"Then I'm same." 

"But if you both are good people then why you always fight?" 

"Let me tell you one thing Jihoon, the thing between me and Seungcheol has been going in for ten years, we have our own pace and even if we fight this is our way to live. So I would be glad if you don't try to understand our relationship. Because there is nothing to look in here. "

Jeonghan said and left. Jihoon just watch him leaving, dumbfounded. 

Surprisingly he didn't hate the harsh words directed to him, he felt ashamed of himself for sniffing into something that didn't concerned him. 

....... 

Seungcheol groaned for the nth time in the past five minute and Jihoon finally lost it. 

"what?" he was angry. 

"I'm am not getting any where with this." Seungcheol tapped madly at his keyboard, probably forming weird words on the screen. 

"Go outside get some inspiration, siting in a room for 5 hours won't do you good." 

"Then why does it help you." Seungcheol pointed out at him. Jihoon rolled his eyes, 

"Because my work is ing different you stupid man." Seungcheol didn't gave him answer, he just whined flapping his arms around. 

"If you want another kind of inspiration then I can always tell you that Yoon Jeonghan is almost done with his assignment." 

"what? How do you know that? What the ." 

"I sit with him when you were gone, for you know.... To your mother." 

"You ing talked with Jeonghan." 

"He is a good guy you know." 

"One period of sitting together and you are in love with him, what kind of witch craft is this?" 

"okay, you are being too dramatic, just go outside and do whatever you want just don't disturb my peace." 

"wow, what a great friend you are." 

"thank you." 

...... 

The next day Seungcheol was no better, he got zero inspiration and he had only one week left with the submission date. 

His day was going really bad, running into a pillar, getting his coffee spilled, lectured by economics teacher(still don't know why he had to take them as literature student.) and now it was writing class where the teacher either would take your assignment or give you tips on your work.

But lucky for him the teacher was absent, so there was no class. He felt happy but his happiness didn't last for three second because there was Yoon Jeonghan. 

"why didn't she come, I was so ready to submit my assignment." 

Seungcheol rolled his eyes, he felt annoyed. 

"You could just send it to her." it was Joshua who had no class so he was accompanying him, Seungcheol didn't like him much either, always sticking to Jeonghan. 

"Nah, she is really technology illiterate so yeah we give her USB." 

For some reason Seungcheol's blood was boiling, weeks of sleepless nights and hours of sittings and he still hadn't got a much done. It seemed that Jeonghan was mocking him, he hated it. And suddenly he was not in his right mind anymore. 

He gritted his teeth and in a second he was behind Jeonghan and maybe he took the USB away and threw it in the fountain. He got his senses back when he saw Jeonghan's face change from surprise to anger. And maybe he regret his actions a little bit. 

"what the hell is wrong with you?" Jeonghan screamed at him, it's been a while. 

Before he could answer Jeonghan pushed him him hard, he stumbled back thank God he had good balance and body control. The regret he had vanished as quickly as it came. 

But he still had no ground to argue. 

"Are you really out of your mind?" Jeonghan was fuming and now that he was not getting any reaction from the other male it made him more mad. 

Seungcheol just shrugged as he said. 

"well you might have the copy in your computer, so don't over react." 

"Don't over react? You ing come out of no where and threw my work away and you think I'm over reacting?" Jeonghan screamed as he hit Seungcheol again and again with his fist. 

Jihoon and Joshua didn't know what to do, it was the first time they saw a fight turning into something more than casual exchange of sarcastic words. 

Seungcheol hold Jeonghan's fist with his hand and pushed him away but Jeonghan was quick as he hold Seungcheol's shirt and they both fall on the ground. Jeonghan's head hit the corner of the fountain and he started bleeding. 

This made him even more angry as he pushed Seungcheol and start hitting so hard, punches thrown again and again. It took a while for Joshua and Jihoon to actually gain some conscious and then they both separated the boys. 

"what is wrong wit you two?" Jihoon shouted. 

"your friend started it." Joshua said, as he dragged Jeonghan. 

But they both have to quit the scolding because for some reason both of them were bleeding. 

"goddammit." Joshua shouted as he dragged the injured friend with him to the nurse office. 

Needless to say they both were heavily bruised and have cut decorating all over their body. They should be glad that there was no broken bone. 

...... 

"wow, I never thought you could do something like this." Seokmin said, sipping his milkshake. Joshua rolled his eyes and Jeonghan huffed. 

"He started it, that bastard." 

"I get that, but can't we just ignore him as some lunatic person and you already had the copy of the work anyway." 

"wow you are taking his side." 

"I'm not, I'm just saying that you don't had to go all that way to prove your hatred or whatever. Look at all these bruises and cuts." 

"we had it worse." 

"I don't even want to imagine this." 

Seokmin who had been watching the scene silently, smiled and said. 

"hyung let's forget about all this and go and have some fun." 

"what are you suggesting?" Joshua raised his brow. 

"we can have fun in arcade." 

"But han is injured." 

"No, I wanna go." 

"okay, let's go." 

"But,"

"please...."

"Okay."

...... 

"I'm not even going to ask anything." 

"Oh that's good because I'm not planning to give you answer anyway." seungcheol shrugged and jihoon almost picked out his hair in frustration. 

"why did you even do that." 

"You said you won't ask." 

"I ing changed my mind," 

"I don't know, I just did. Maybe too much pent up stress." 

"And the only option was to throw jeonghan's USB away and then beat him to death." 

"Hold your horses, I got beaten up too." 

"You deserved that, I would have beaten up you too if you did anything like that to me." 

"we have it worse." 

"I don't even want to imagine that." 

"don't, I'm telling you. Don't interfere with me and him. We are just like this," 

Jihoon didn't know why but at some point both males asked him to not to come into their business. It was nuisance him but he had to let go. 

...... 

"wow I'm so glad we did this." Jeonghan smiled as they came out of the arcade hands filled with prizes. Seokmin pout. 

"you are liar, you said you weren't good and you got them all." 

"I'm just natural." 

"Natural liar." Joshua snort. 

they were laughing and walking, when someone approached them. 

"Jeonghan?" the stranger asked. Jeonghan looked at the stranger, he froze. 

"Oh is he someone you know Han?" Joshua asked. 

"Oh yes we know each other we went to same high school, how are you doing Jeonghan?" Jeonghan couldn't bring himself to utter a single word as he just nod, barely breathing "good". How come his nightmare was still here talking to him.

"wow, it's been so long. I would love to catch up." 

"You knew him from high school, then you must know a lot about him." 

Seokmin looked excited. 

For some reason seokmin and Joshua didn't get jeonghan's anxiety. 

"of course I know, we were best friends." 

The stranger smiled, jeonghan's stomach churn in disgust. He wanted to push him away, he wanted to scream at him. But he couldn't. He never could. 

"wow, I didn't know he had friends before us." 

"aww, Han you didn't tell them about, about us." the stranger pout. 

"Oh since you are meeting after such a long time why don't we have a chat somewhere." 

Joshua said, 

"Ah No it's okay, we in a bit of hurry." finally jeonghan gained his conscious. He was in this alone, he had to fight. There was no 'him' today. 

"Oh come on Han, we have met after such a long time and you don't want to have a chat." the stranger hold his hand, and jeonghan's first instinct was to push away. 

"Han? Is everything okay." Joshua asked. 

"yes, and we are leaving." 

He tried to push Joshua to walk but the stranger hold in his shoulder. 

"isn't it a bit rude to leave your friend like that." that smile, it gives shivers to Jeonghan, he wanted to run away. 

"yes hyung, isn't a bit rude?" seokmin said, and jeonghan thought why his friends were this oblivious. 

"let go." he shouted, but he didn't, the grip was same as ever. Strong. 

From the other perspective jeonghan looked ride and his friends were looking at him in disbelief. Yeah no one ever believed him. 

........ 

Seungcheol and jihoon left the Cafe ans were now going back to their dorm when they heard a familiar shout. 

"let go." 

Seungcheol head whipped towards the direction and his eyes grew large with disbelief. 

He was there, Kim Mingyu. What was he doing there? And why was he holding onto jeonghan? And why his friends were not helping?

An urge of anger rose into him, jeognahn really had bad selection of friends. 

He walked towards them. 

With one hand he pushed mingyu away, taking Jeonghan in his arms. 

"what the are you doing here?" seungcheol growled pushing jeonghan behind him. 

"Oh, prince have come to rescue the princess, lord I thought you guys might not be with each other anymore. I was just having fun with my best friend you know." 

" off, you are not needed here." 

Seungcheol was furious, seokmin and Joshua were terrified. Seungcheol looked more scarier than ever. Then they just register jeonghan's conditions in, he was shaking. 

"Han?" Joshua was now worried. 

"Oh come on, I'm just having fun. You also are not needed here, Han hates you too. At least I'm his best friend."

"was is the right tense, now off." 

"I won't." Mingyu said as he tried to held jeonghan again. 

But seungcheol pushed his hands away, punching the male striaght into his face. 

"I said off. "he growled, 

" tch you all are no fun." mingyu said spitting the blood away. 

"And just for you to know han, short hair looks fabulous on you." he smiled and walked off. 

Jeonghan was still shivering even when Joshua asked the question so many times he still handy opened his mouth. 

Seungcheol turned around and looked at the valunrable jeonghan, of course he didn't care about the condition. 

" why you didn't push that guy away" he asked Joshua. 

"we didn't know he was harmful." Joshua. Felt guilty. 

Seungcheol clicked his tongue and looked at Jeonghan. 

"Are you ing insane? What kind of friends do you even have with you? Huh.... Why the you don't tell them anything? you think you can handle this? Can you handle this with such condition of yours?" 

Seungcheol was so loud Joshua wanted to shut him off, he tried but Jeonghan hold his hand, stopping him. 

For the first time he didn't talk back to Seungcheol. 

"I'm sorry. "

"Tch don't be sorry to me, be sorry to the people who go through things for you."

'aren't you one of them?' Jeonghan Thought. 

"I'm leaving, next time if I find you in such situation I would let you die." seungcheol scoffed as he left. 

....... 

Mingyu was the first friend jeonghan had when he came to high school. He was so glad to finally able to find a person to share his sorrows and happiness. He finally had someone who get protect him from the bullying of seungcheol. Life was good. 

Seungcheol would tell him that mingyu wasn't a good guy but jeonghan would just ignore him

It didn't happened until the second year where mingyu started to act cold around him, when asked he he would ignore him. At that time jeognahn needed a friend to lean on. Because he had been growing his hair and people started bullying him for that. 

He hated it, but he loved his hair too much to cut off. 

And then one day everything changed. That day mingyu pushed him when he asked why was he acting distant and how much jeonghan needed his friend back. It wasn't the end, mingyu even dragged him to the bullies. He was beaten up, bleeding he tried to get away but there were four boys and mingyu was guarding the door. When they were done mingyu came to him, and with scissor he cut Jeonghan hair off. 

It was night when Jeonghan was dragging his bruised body, crying loudly when he saw Seungcheol. Seungcheol looked so surprised and angry. 

Jeonghan didn't know what came to him, he walked towards his enemy and hold his hand. Slowly squeezing him with all the energy left in him. 

"help me." he cried. 

The next day the mingyu and the bullies were all beaten up, blood was splattered.

Seungcheol was suspended for two weeks,but they never talk about that. 

...... 

Joshua and seokmin didn't say a single thing for a solid one minute. 

And then seokmin started crying, hugging jeonghan, jeonghan smiled sadly. 

Joshua looked angry. 

"why the hell you didn't tell us." 

"i just don't want to go through that again." 

"we would never do this hyung." seokmin cried. 

"I know, I just don't trust anymore." 

"you have to trust us Han." Joshua said. 

"I'm trying Josh, give me sometime." 

"we will, we will give you time. But hyung please think that we are always by your side." 

"I know." 

In the end the only person he had ever believed and trust was seungcheol, it was odd that he hated the man but he knew he was the only man who showed him his true feeling, not coated. But pure and raw feeling. Even if it was hatred.