“Holy .” Baekhyun mutters under his breath once the driver pulls the car in front of the main lobby of the most beautiful hotel Baekhyun has ever seen in his life. Chanyeol had told him that the resort is beautiful because Somin wants the best for them, but Baekhyun was sceptical.

Somin really came through on her words, and Baekhyun is impressed.

The place is worth the long journey. Chanyeol and Baekhyun had gotten to the airport early in the morning and met Mrs. Park there, then they flew here first class (also Somin’s doing), and got into the car that Somin assigned for them once they got here. Baekhyun, despite being a successful model himself, is used to the modest lifestyle that his mother ingrained in him since he was little. To be given first class flight tickets, escorted in an expensive car to the hotel, and gotten a stay in this gorgeous hotel aren’t luxuries that Baekhyun is used to.

He feels so spoiled – and it’s certainly not a bad feeling.

The hotel is far from the airport and needs a 40-minute drive from the nearest town. It’s secluded, surrounded by quiet forest and lush, colourful garden that are so well-maintained that Baekhyun wouldn’t dare to touch the flowers even if he’s dying to. It’s like stepping into the land of fairy tales, where everything is good, and pretty, and calm.

Baekhyun sees that there’s a huge lake behind the hotel where people are doing recreational activities like kayaking, sightseeing, and picnicking, and as the hotel is located on a low hill, it provides a beautiful view of the forest surrounding it. Baekhyun stares at the horizon, imagining how beautiful the scenery would be during sunset.

He makes a mental note to go out for a walk to watch the sunset once everything is settled.

The limousines and expensive cars at the entrance gives Baekhyun an idea of the types of people here. There is no way that this is a place for commoners. Not everyone can afford to be here, so Baekhyun thinks that the people here are either royalties from other countries or extremely wealthy people looking for serenity. Even Chanyeol has told him that he’s surprised that Somin managed to book a room here as the rooms are always full and the prices of the rooms are really expensive. However, Somin has connections everywhere and her family is a family of money, so of course she can pull this off.

All Chanyeol does is insist that he pays for the rooms. Somin didn’t want to let him at first because Chanyeol’s family is Somin’s favourite relatives, but Chanyeol doesn’t feel good about letting Somin pay for everything.

Baekhyun is almost afraid to ask how much Chanyeol is paying. Despite his own rule about how Chanyeol is to pay for everything, he’s itching to pitch in a little bit so that Chanyeol doesn’t feel burdened.

But Chanyeol doesn’t say anything, so Baekhyun stays silent.

Speaking of Chanyeol, Baekhyun suddenly realises that it’s so quiet in the car. Chanyeol has been chattering non-stop ever since they got off the plane, clearly excited for some days off from work, but now his voice is mute. 

Baekhyun looks around and finds that he’s alone while everyone’s already out. And Chanyeol’s still talking, except that he’s talking outside the car now.

Good God, how long has he been gaping at the hotel?

When he steps out of the car, Baekhyun is greeted by a young, handsome hotel worker who offers to carry his bag. Baekhyun refuses because in his bag is his laptop which is his most prized possession so there’s no way he’d let anyone hold it except for him. He tells the worker that he has only a luggage in the trunk, so he can carry that instead. The hotel worker nods and scurries away to help his colleagues with the bags.

Baekhyun glances to his left and sees Chanyeol talking to one of the workers in fluent English, probably about the check-ins and the places to see – and , Baekhyun had forgotten how hot that is.

When they were dating, they had gone to places where they needed to speak in English. Baekhyun would say that he himself was somewhat decent, but Chanyeol is near fluent because he travelled a lot with his family when he was little and had taken extra English classes due to his interest in the language. Baekhyun just depended on Chanyeol back in the days, and he liked it.

Chanyeol is extremely attractive when he speaks in a different language. His voice deepens somehow, he gives out an aura that he’s not to be ed with, and he’s so confident and pleased with himself that Baekhyun wants nothing more than to jump him right then and there because , there’s nothing hotter than a confident multilingual man.

And Baekhyun has always been possessive. He always wants to stake his claim. He’d pull Chanyeol back in the car if he has his way, straddle him and kiss him senseless, kiss him until Chanyeol loses his breath. Chanyeol likes it when Baekhyun runs his hand through his hair and pulls, and Baekhyun would do exactly that, purposely grinding down to hear Chanyeol’s moans and pleas, ones that Chanyeol lets out loudly because he’s not the quiet type.

Chanyeol has always been loud, and Baekhyun wants him mumbling nonsensical stuff in English to him although Baekhyun doesn’t understand them. Wants Chanyeol to lose control, to scream, to beg. He’d palm his through his pants, feel Chanyeol buckle against him and pleads for more, because if there’s anyone who has this effect on Chanyeol, it’s Baekhyun, and Baekhyun loves that. Loves being the one who makes Chanyeol lose all coherency, the one who drives him bat crazy.

He’d fill Chanyeol’s neck with kisses and hickeys. He wants that milky skin filled with his mark because this man, this fluent man of many language is his. His, his, his.

He wants nothing more than to push Chanyeol back as he makes room to slink down to his knees, spreads Chanyeol’s legs apart, s his pants. Baekhyun would lean forward and…

“Baekhyun! You look flushed!” a voice interrupts Baekhyun’s thought. “You okay?”

It’s Mrs. Park.

.

Baekhyun’s face reddens even more, but he quickly smiles, “Yeah, I’m okay.”

Mrs. Park seems to see right through his bull as she follows Baekhyun’s gaze earlier and lands on her own son. She smiles knowingly.

“I see.”

“Mrs. Park, it’s not what you think!” Baekhyun is flustered, but she shakes her head.

“It’s okay, I understand,” she winks at Baekhyun. Bless her heart, Baekhyun knows that she’s trying to make him feel better but Baekhyun wants nothing more than for the ground to swallow him whole right now.

She chuckles when Baekhyun’s face gets beet red, but then she links her arms with him anyway and walks with him to the lobby.

Chanyeol is in front of them, blissfully oblivious of Baekhyun’s embarrassing incident. He doesn’t notice that Baekhyun is practically as red as a cooked crab at this moment. When he notices that Baekhyun and Mrs. Park is following him, he smiles contently before turning around and walks ahead of them.

“Amazing huh?” Mrs. Park says, looking around the grand lobby. Chanyeol is already at the receptionist, probably settling the check-ins and getting the keys to their rooms.

“Yeah, it’s – it’s impressive.”

“Somin has a way of getting things that she wants. I told her that we’d be fine with just a cheap hotel in the city but of course she has to pull some strings to give us the best hotel there is,” Mrs. Park sounds so excited. Baekhyun doesn’t want to dampen her mood, so he forces a smile before nodding in agreement.

She sits on one of the sofas, and Baekhyun sits next to her. His eyes never leave Chanyeol, who is talking to the receptionist. Baekhyun has no idea how Chanyeol can look so dashing even when he’s in his most casual clothes. Right now, they’re around people who practically screams money. From crisp suits and shirts to shiny shoes, Baekhyun can tell that these people have money. Even the casual ones wear jewelleries that probably cost Baekhyun his entire apartment.

Baekhyun can’t help but to observe their fashion and style while feeling a little inferior because he’s only sporting on his large hoodie, washed jeans, and red sneakers. He can sense that Mrs. Park feels the same way too, but she doesn’t say anything.

But Chanyeol, he has an aura of confidence around him that he looks like he just… belongs.

Once he’s gotten the keys, Chanyeol turns around and makes his way towards his mother and Baekhyun.

“Here’s your key, Mom.” Chanyeol hands the key to his mother, “Are we still on for dinner tonight?”

“I’ve already made the reservation, so yes. I’ll see you here at 8?”

“Okay Mom,” Chanyeol says, leaning down when she tiptoes to kiss his cheeks. She smiles warmly at Baekhyun before gesturing the hotel workers to get her bags. She walks away afterwards, muttering something about taking a nap because she’s exhausted from the flight and the drive here.

Baekhyun looks up to Chanyeol, holding out his hand and waits for his keys.

Much to his dismay, Chanyeol just stands there. He looks conflicted, struggling with himself and he is trying (and failing) to hide his worries from Baekhyun.

But Baekhyun knows Chanyeol too well. He knows that look. He knows that look too well.

It’s the we-have-a-problem look and Baekhyun hates that look.

“Okay, what is it?” he asks knowingly. He’s not sure he wants to know the answer.

“I think we have a problem here.”

“I can conclude that much,” Baekhyun rolls his eyes, “But what?”

Chanyeol bites his bottom lip, “I think you should see for yourself.”

//

“You have got to be kidding me,” Baekhyun says once he enters the room.

Don’t get him wrong. The room is absolutely beautiful. It has large windows overlooking the lake, the light enters the room and brightens it up, and the view is amazing. It has a large television, large closet space, a mini kitchen, spacious bathroom linked, plush sofas in front of the television – basically a cute room that Baekhyun appreciates.

But the problem is there is only one bed.

Chanyeol rubs his temple, feeling headache coming because he didn’t anticipate this at all. On the elevator, he explained to Baekhyun that he thought that they’d be having a room each. He thought that Somin would at least do that, but he then remembered that Somin thinks that he and Baekhyun are still dating, and it’s normal for couples to share a room together. So why would Somin book for two rooms for Baekhyun and Chanyeol? Not when the last time she saw them, they’re practically inseparable.

Chanyeol said that he tried to book for another room, but there’s no empty one and there’s nothing they could do.

And that’s how they got into this sticky situation.

“I – I guess only one of us can use the bed,” Chanyeol mutters, “Yeah, I’ll sleep on the couch. You can have the bed.”

He then picks up the bag and starts to walk towards the couch. However, he is then stopped by Baekhyun who catches his arm before he could go.

“You’re being ridiculous. Why shouldn’t you get the bed?” Baekhyun asks.

Chanyeol’s expression morphs from surprised to confused, “W-what? Baek, I’m giving you the bed. You can’t seriously want to argue with me about this!”

“I’m not trying to argue with you. I’m just saying that it’s unfair that you paid for this expensive room but sleeps on the couch. It’s just not right!”

“Well, unless you want to sleep on the same bed…”

“What? No!” Baekhyun squeals, his face hot of all the sudden, “Pfft, why would I want to sleep on you? I mean with – no, bed – I mean, on the bed with you? Why would I do that?”

Baekhyun knows he probably looks ridiculous right now, as Chanyeol looks at him like he’s suddenly grown three heads.

“Glad to know that sleeping on the same bed as me is repulsive to you.”

Baekhyun’s jaw drops. That’s what Chanyeol gets from this?

“No, that’s not what I meant!”

“No, it’s okay,” Chanyeol huffs, looking far from pleased, “I don’t mind sleeping on the couch, really. I’m a gentleman, and I think you should take the bed.”

“I can be a gentleman too!” Baekhyun exclaims, “I think you should take the bed!”

“Baekhyun, what the hell!”

“I’ll sleep on the couch! You take the bed,” Baekhyun pushes Chanyeol and quickly pads to the couch. He sits on it and smiles up at Chanyeol, “Mine!”

“You’re ridiculous.” Chanyeol says, “Baekhyun, just take the bed.”

“No, this couch is mine!” Baekhyun stick out his tongue, “I’m being a gentleman now. Go to your bed, Chanyeol.”

Chanyeol sighs, but he is so tired from the journey that he doesn’t have the energy to argue with Baekhyun anymore.

So he shakes his head at Baekhyun’s stubbornness and makes his way to the bathroom to freshen up. Baekhyun’s left in the room on the couch, still thinking about the sleeping arrangement.

The thought of spending the weekend with his ex in such close proximity drives him crazy. It’s bad enough that he still has feelings for him, but now that he has to be in the same room at him for hours at night, with no way of escaping. There’s no way he’s getting out of this trip without his feelings intensifying to ridiculous level, and there’s no way he’s not going to get hurt when everything’s over.

Baekhyun slumps on the couch, pressing his palms on his eyes.

“.”

//

“Baekhyun, we’re just having dinner with my mom,” Chanyeol sighs from the other side of the bathroom door, where Baekhyun is taking his time getting ready, “What’s taking so long?”

“You literally gave me 15 minutes to get ready when you know that I need at least 30. You should’ve woken me up earlier if we’re in a rush!”

“We’re not in a rush but I don’t want to keep my mom waiting! Hurry up, already!”

“I don’t know what to tell you, Chanyeol. I’m gonna need at least 10 more minutes, but more if you don’t stop complaining!” Baekhyun loses his patience. He’s trying to get ready as fast as he can but Chanyeol whining from the other side of the door isn’t helping, “Just go to your mother and explain everything to her. I’ll be right down.

Chanyeol rolls his eyes. He knows that there’s no point in trying to force Baekhyun to come out when he’s getting ready because he always takes forever and Chanyeol can do nothing but wait.

Back then they were dating, this behaviour of Baekhyun’s used to drive Chanyeol absolutely bonkers because Chanyeol hates being late. He is punctual. He hates it when people wait for him. He’d rather do the waiting. However, dating Baekhyun means he’d be late to certain events because Baekhyun puts lots of effort in his looks when he goes to appointments and events. He loves looking pretty.

Dating Baekhyun for a few years, Chanyeol became more in tune with his behaviour. He developed patience, and he learns that if he wants to get anywhere on time, he has to tell Baekhyun to get ready at least an hour before time.

He has no idea how he’s forgotten all that. Earlier, they took a nap, Chanyeol on the bed and Baekhyun on the couch, and Chanyeol had gotten up earlier to get ready. He’s about to wake Baekhyun up too but Baekhyun looked so calm, almost angelic when he sleeps.

Chanyeol remembers back then he used to watch Baekhyun sleep, taking in his beauty, and falling deeper and deeper in love with the man sleeping next to him. He can’t do that now.

Chanyeol decided to give Baekhyun some extra time to sleep.

He regrets his decision now.

Chanyeol goes to the lobby and waits for his mother there. When his mother is 5 minutes late, Chanyeol calls her mobile.

“Mom? You okay? I’m already at the lobby.” Chanyeol says.

“Oh, yeah, about that,” she hesitates, “I’m gonna have to cancel.”

“What?” Chanyeol exclaims, “Why?”

“Your aunt called and said she needs help at the hall so I gotta meet her tonight,” she sighs dramatically. Chanyeol can’t help but to think that it’s too fake to be real – it’s like she’s acting, and she’s a terrible actress, “But the reservation’s still on, so you boys go have fun! Don’t cancel just because of me.”

Chanyeol is suspicious, “You’ve been dying to go to that restaurant ever since Somin told you about it, now you wanna cancel? Look, we can just postpone…”

“No!” Mrs. Park interrupts, “No, I’m okay. You should just go. I don’t feel like calling them just to cancel the reservation anyway. Baekhyun would love the place. It’s really romantic,”

Chanyeol’s eyebrow raised, “Why would you reserve a table for us three at a romantic restaurant at the first place?”

Silence.

“Mom…”

“Chanyeol?” a voice interrupts from behind him. Chanyeol turns and finds Baekhyun standing behind him. He’s wearing blue silk shirt and skinny black jeans, he has light makeup on, just black eyeliner smudged along his lash line to give him a more defined look and concealer and bb cream to give him fresher look. He has his hair styled up too, and he looks beautiful that he takes Chanyeol’s breath away.

“Where’s your mom?” Baekhyun asks.

“Is that Baekhyunnie I hear?” Mrs. Park says, “Well then, have fun, okay? I need to go now, bye!”

Chanyeol doesn’t get another word out before she hangs up on him. He sighs in frustration before putting his phone back in his jeans pocket.

“Mom cancelled on us,”

“Oh, ouch?” Baekhyun says and Chanyeol chuckles.

Chanyeol should have expected this. The plan was sketchy at the first place.

It’s so weird that his mother would make a reservation at a restaurant known for being the ultimate place for couples. Even Somin said that it’s the place where she goes for dates with her fiancé, and there’s rarely any family or other companies there because of the romantic atmosphere. Chanyeol didn’t say anything when his mother booked a table there because he thought she might be interested in that place. She is, after all, planning to open a restaurant in the near future so she always goes to random restaurants to find inspiration.

Chanyeol thinks that this has to do with the fact that she still feels bad about taking the news that he’s gay badly.

It took a while for him to come out to his parents about his uality and when he came out, neither of them took the news well. It put such immense pressure on both his parents that they ended up fighting a lot and then separating.

Both of his parents remain as friends and they’re all good now, but Chanyeol remembers how lonely he felt during those times. Baekhyun was there for him. He was there through it all, which is why he was more dependent on Baekhyun more than his own family back then.

Now, she’s trying to make up for what she did. She loves Baekhyun. She gives both of them her full blessings. Every time she sees them, she showers them with so much love so that Baekhyun feels like he’s a part of the family. And he is, technically, as Baekhyun has charmed her so well that she sees him as the second son she never thought she’d have.

Sometimes Chanyeol thinks she loves Baekhyun more than she loves him.

Chanyeol appreciates it, but everything she does makes it more difficult for him to tell her that Baekhyun is no longer his boyfriend.

“So, how now?” Baekhyun asks, crossing his arms across his chest.

Chanyeol sighs, “It’s not that there’s anything else to do. Let’s go have dinner.”

//

As it turns out, the restaurant indeed is for couples. Chanyeol is immediately baffled by the soft, romantic music, the pink wallpapers, chairs, and tables, and the waiters dressed in pink from head to toe. It feels like the restaurant is constantly in Valentine’s Day mood, and Chanyeol isn’t happy with this.

“It’s…. pretty,” Baekhyun comments from Chanyeol’s side, looking around him with gaze filled with hilarity, “Certainly not what I expected, but I guess we shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, eh?”

Chanyeol rolls his eyes before turning towards the maitre d’ and tells him about the reservation made under Mrs Park’s name. Chanyeol wishes that there’s a mix up somewhere and there’s no reservation under his mom’s name at all, but of course luck’s not his side.

“Ah, here it is,” the maitre d’ says after scanning the long list in his hands, “Your table is ready, sir.”

Chanyeol can feel his face redden with embarrassment once he’s seated. He’s surrounded by couples, some are holding hands, some are kissing, some have hands under the table doing God knows what… Chanyeol has never felt more uncomfortable in his life. He can’t help but to wonder whether it won’t be as bad if he’s here with a partner and not an ex, but as the couple next to their table start making out, Chanyeol decides that he’d hate this place even if he is here with a boyfriend.

Baekhyun, on the other hand, looks absolutely amused.

“Cute,” he says, looking at the couple near the window, who are too busy looking into each other’s eyes that they don’t realise that their food has arrived. Baekhyun wonders if they will get to eating their food before it gets cold, or are they just going to stare at each other until the restaurant closes.

Chanyeol grunts, feeling himself grow hotter. He keeps his eyes on the menu, looking for the simplest dish there is so that he can eat fast and get out of here faster.

“Why are you so tense?” Baekhyun asks suddenly. Chanyeol looks up and finds Baekhyun staring at him.

“Tense? I’m not tense.”

“Is this because this place is full of couples?” Baekhyun replies knowingly, a smirk appears on his face, “Chanyeol relax, it’s not that everyone here knows that we’re not dating. Just act casual and we’ll be fine.” He pauses before adding, “Besides, this is so funny.”

“I’m fine and it’s not funny – it’s awkward.” Chanyeol insists stubbornly. He scans the menu, “Even the menus are designed for couples to share. Too much for one person, too little for two. What do they think we’re gonna do?  Eat spaghetti like Lady and the Tramp?”

“You gotta admit, that was a pretty cute scene.” Baekhyun quips.

“Well I’m not gonna kiss you even with spaghetti so cut it out.”

Baekhyun frowns, “You speak as if I want to kiss you. I don’t.”

“Yeah? Well good.”

“Good.”

Silence falls, but then broken a few seconds letter when Chanyeol exclaims, “Oysters? Really?”

“Oyster is a great aphrodisiac.”

“I know. I’m not stupid.”

“Yeah? Could’ve fooled me,”

Chanyeol is about to retort when a young, round eyed man with a heart shaped smile comes to their table.

“Good evening! I’m Kyungsoo and I’ll be your waiter this evening,” he says, smiling from ear to ear, “May I get your order?”

They both order their food. Chanyeol can’t help but to notice that Kyungsoo’s gaze seems to linger on Baekhyun for a tad longer and he seems to blush at everything Baekhyun says, even when the man only orders pesto spaghetti with grilled chicken.

There’s nothing attractive about pesto spaghetti with grilled chicken but Kyungsoo blushes anyway.

Chanyeol doesn’t think he’ll ever get over how easily Baekhyun charms everyone. Baekhyun doesn’t even try, but he gets people’s attention anyway.

“So,” Baekhyun starts, “Did you talk to Sehun today?”

Well, that’s random. But Chanyeol guesses it’s good that there’s a topic for conversation. It’s not that they’re not used to talking about their friends anyway.

“Yeah, he went to the museum with Jongin today,” Chanyeol says, “Can you imagine it? Sehun in a museum?”

At that, Baekhyun laughs.

“It’s Jongin’s doing, I bet. Sehun used to suffer in history classes, so I can’t see how he’d enjoy museums.”

“It’s not often that he gets a day off,” Chanyeol sighs, a smile on his face, “Jongin must have wanted a museum date for a while. Maybe this is just him spoiling Jongin. Although, Sehun seemed to be having a good time when I Facetimed him earlier. I guess he doesn’t hate museums that much.”

“He doesn’t hate anything when Jongin’s there. Boy’s too whipped for his own good.”

“They’re in love. Everyone forgets about what they hate the most when they’re with the people they love.”

Baekhyun nods. He does know that. He remembers how everything used to get so much better when Chanyeol’s around. He remembers how amazing it is to love someone. People say that love hurts but Baekhyun thinks that he’s never as happy as he was when he’s in love.

“I miss being in love,” Baekhyun says, his voice soft, “I haven’t felt that since… well, you.”

Chanyeol’s face softens, “Same here.”

“What we had… it was good, right?” Baekhyun asks, focusing on Chanyeol.

Chanyeol is taken back by the question, but he quickly hides it with a smile.

“Yeah, it was.”

Baekhyun has no idea what he expected from Chanyeol, but Chanyeol’s answer sparks a curiosity in him, one that he needs an answer to. Baekhyun thinks about how this might not be the best place to have this conversation, but as he looks at Chanyeol, he thinks about their past, their love, their relationship – and he needs to know.

“Then why did you end it?”

Chanyeol’s eyes widen. He did not expect that at all. Especially when they were literally laughing about Sehun and Jongin just now.

“Baekhyun, I… I thought you… we discussed this.”

“No, we didn’t, actually. You said you wanted to break up with me, and I said okay. ‘It’s just not working out’,” Baekhyun makes an air quote, “I believe that’s what you said. But I never knew… why didn’t we work out? Is it me? Is it my fault?”

“What? No!” Chanyeol exclaims, “No, it’s not you. It’s me.”

Baekhyun chuckles, “That’s always the line, isn’t it? So, it’s you. Not me. And you broke up with me because you didn’t love me anymore?”

“Why’re you asking all these questions?” Chanyeol whispers, “It doesn’t matter anymore.”

“I’m just… curious. I mean, of course you stopped loving me, why else would you break up with me?” Baekhyun says, his heart breaking but he keeps his tone nonchalant and uncaring, “But what did I do to make you stop loving me? What did I do wrong?”

Baekhyun waits for Chanyeol’s answer. He keeps his eyes on Chanyeol, refuses to budge from his question. Much to his dismay, Chanyeol is equally as stubborn because a minute passes, and Baekhyun still doesn’t hear a peep from Chanyeol.

He finally sighs when he realises that Chanyeol’s not going to say anything, “Fine. Whatever. Don’t answer if you don’t want to.”

“Why didn’t you fight?”

Chanyeol’s eyes are on him now, hard and uncaring, as if he didn’t spend the last minute trying to avoid Baekhyun’s gaze. Baekhyun blinks, a little confused by the question.

“Fight for what?”

“Me. For us.”

“Are you – are you serious?” Baekhyun sputters, his sadness from earlier slowly turning into disbelief, and then anger, “Are you trying to shift the blame on me?”

“Blame? No one’s blaming anyone! We both wanted it, so there’s no one to blame! Unless,” Chanyeol frowns, “Unless you’ve been blaming me this whole time.”

“If I don’t blame you, I’d blame myself!” Baekhyun exclaims, his voice loud and practically booms in the restaurant, “You give me nothing to work with! You’re the one who broke up with me without giving me a proper reason why! You’re the one who left me in the dark! You’re the one who stopped loving me and walked away without sparing a second about what I feel!” Baekhyun’s voice croaked, “You made me feel like there’s something wrong with me.”

“I did it because one of us should! You clearly didn’t care anymore because you immediately said yes when I said we should call it quits! You wanted it, so you don’t get to blame me for doing what you’re too scared to do!”

“Chanyeol, what the ? I wasn’t going to break up with you at all!”

“We’re suffering. We both were. You don’t get to stand there acting like a victim! If you truly didn’t want to break up with me, you’d fight for me and you’d stop what I was about to do! But you didn’t fight – you never did and I saw that you never will. I did what you’re scared to do, Baekhyun, deep inside, you know that’s the truth.”

He’s wrong. He’s so wrong, Baekhyun thinks.

Baekhyun wants to scream. Never in his life has he thought about leaving Chanyeol. He knows how hard everything was back then. He knew that Chanyeol was struggling and the search for decent jobs were taking a toll on both their physical and mental health. Chanyeol was struggling more than he was because he’s more reserved and the competition was fierce. Even when Baekhyun had gotten better job, Chanyeol was stuck with his old one, and Baekhyun had to cover a lot of their bills as they were already living together.

Baekhyun wasn’t able to focus on both Chanyeol and his career, and that too was taking a toll on their relationship. The financial struggle did get to them no matter how hard they tried to deny it. They fought more than usual. The cold shoulders went on for days. They heads over the pettiest of things. They both found flaw in the littlest things. Baekhyun remembered feeling burdened and angry at Chanyeol, so he lashed out every single time and had gotten even angrier when Chanyeol remained calm and pat-

Oh. No. No.

Chanyeol was right. He had wanted to end it.

He just never realised it.

“You’re always so stubborn, Baekhyun,” Chanyeol says, “You held on to me because I was the only love you had known. You were suffering. You’re angry, and frustrated, and you took it all out on me although you didn’t realise it. I didn’t break up with you because I couldn’t stand you. I broke up with you because it was the right thing to do. I loved you, so I let you go. You had wanted me to let you go, but you loved me too much to admit that. You were torn, so I made the decision for both of us.”

Tears well up in Baekhyun’s eyes and before he knows it, he’s crying. Chanyeol’s expression changes from angry to concerned, but when he reaches out for Baekhyun, Baekhyun swats his hand away.

“Don’t touch me.”

“Baekhyun, don’t be like this.”

“No, I just,” Baekhyun sobs. God, this is too much. The realization is too much, and it’s suffocating, and all Baekhyun wants is to breathe, “I need to go.”

“Baekhyun, we came together. The driver’s waiting for us….”

“Then I’ll take the cab.” Baekhyun says as he gets up, “Please don’t follow me. I just – I need some time alone.”

Chanyeol doesn’t get to say anything else as Baekhyun quickly gets out of the restaurant. Several pairs of eyes turn to Chanyeol, curious to see how he’d react now. He knows that everyone in the restaurant might have heard what Baekhyun and him said to each other just now, considering that they’re not exactly quiet. He feels hot under their stare.

But before he gets to stand up and walk away, food comes to his table. The waiter, Kyungsoo, looks at him apologetically when he places the plates on the table. He looks at Baekhyun’s plate, and asks, “Should I make this as your to-go?”

Chanyeol shakes his head, “Both of them, please. I need to get out of here.”

//

Chanyeol has no idea how long has he been walking. He had given the food to the driver and had told him to drive back to the hotel and give the food to Baekhyun. He texted Baekhyun afterwards, telling him to be safe no matter where he was, to which Baekhyun replied that he’s on his way back to the hotel and he’s calmed down now.

Chanyeol texted back saying that he’d go back to the hotel in an hour. He guesses he should call for a cab now, but he feels his heart grow heavy at the thought of going back to the hotel. His mind is going on overdrive. He feels uneasy. He can’t stop thinking about how hurt Baekhyun looked earlier, how he’s the one who caused that. How he’s the one who made him cry.

Maybe Chanyeol needs to get his mind sorted out too.

So, he keeps walking. He has no idea where he is or where he’s going, but walking calms him down.

Chanyeol only realises that he’s tired when he reaches a bus stop. He sits down, willing his mind to think about anything but Baekhyun. Anything but how much he wants to comfort him but he can’t, how much he wants to tell him that he loves him but he can’t, how much he wants things to go back to the way they were but he can’t.

He should have known that this isn’t going to go well at the first place. He wants to call Sehun to tell him about what went on, but he is sure that Sehun is enjoying his time with Jongin, and he doesn’t want to burden him with his trouble.

Chanyeol sighs.

“Um, mister?” A voice interrupts his thought, “Aren’t you that guy from the restaurant?”

Chanyeol looks up, his gaze meeting the wide-eyed waiter from the restaurant earlier. He is bundled up in thick clothes and fluffy scarves, but Chanyeol recognizes him nonetheless.

“And you’re that waiter,” Chanyeol replies, brows furrowing as he tries to remember his name. Eventually, he says, “Kyungsoo, right?”

“Yeah,” Kyungsoo says, “What’re you doing here?”

What is he doing here? Chanyeol doesn’t have the answer to that.

“Me? What are you doing here?” Chanyeol asks.

“I live 2 blocks from here,” Kyungsoo replies.

Chanyeol nods in understanding. He then notices that Kyungsoo is probably waiting for his answer, so he sighs, “I need to clear my mind a little bit.  You know what happened at the restaurant.”

“I see,” Kyungsoo says. He looks at Chanyeol who has his eyes on the ground. It amazes Kyungsoo how someone so tall can look so small from how pitiful he is. It’s like Chanyeol wants to curl on the floor and just disappear. He’s shivering, and Kyungsoo can hear his stomach rumbling.

He remembers that Chanyeol didn’t eat at the restaurant.

“Well, it’s cold out here,” Kyungsoo says, taking pity on the man in front of him, “I can tell that you’re hungry.” When Chanyeol looks up at his quizzically, Kyungsoo continues, “You are hungry, right? You didn’t eat anything earlier and I can hear your stomach rumbling.”

Chanyeol blushes. Alright, he is hungry.

“I know a good diner just a block from here.” Kyungsoo grins “C’mon then, I’m heading there anyway. I could use a company.”

Chanyeol hesitates, perhaps feeling a little weird at the prospect of eating with a stranger.

Kyungsoo rolls his eyes, “I’m not up to anything funny or weird, I swear. I just finished an extremely long shift and I just want a fat greasy burger and alcohol in my system,”

Chanyeol gulps. A fat, greasy burger sounds so good right now.

“So, you wanna sit here and wallow, or you’re gonna come with me and wallow at the pub, with burgers and beer? Your choice.”

That’s an easy choice to make.

Chanyeol stands up, and Kyungsoo smiles.

“Thought so.” He starts walking. Chanyeol follows behind him like a lost puppy.

“What’s your name, by the way?” Kyungsoo asks.

“Chanyeol. Park Chanyeol.”

Kyungsoo nods, and Chanyeol notices that he’s smiling although half of his face is wrapped in scarves, “Nice name, Chanyeol. Let’s walk faster, shall we? I ing hate cold wind.”

He then practically jogs to the place, and Chanyeol says nothing as he follows suit.

//

Chanyeol finishes his burger and beer in record time. He didn’t realise how hungry he was until the waitress came with his food and he drooled before practically ravishing the food. Kyungsoo is a slow eater, Chanyeol notices. Or, maybe he’s just so surprised to see Chanyeol eat like he hasn’t eaten in days that he spends more time watching Chanyeol eat instead of finishing his own food.

Chanyeol burps, his eyes go wide when he does that. His ears redden as he flushes in embarrassment.

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay. But I gotta ask, is this your first meal of the day or…?”

“No, I’m just… starving. I usually eat a lot when I travel.”

“Oh? So you’re not from here?”

“Nope.”

“I see,” Kyungsoo says, “I guess it makes sense now. I mean, you went to the restaurant that is famous for being the ultimate place for couples with your… ex? Sorry, it’s not that hard to conclude that, considering that you two were quite loud earlier.”

Chanyeol’s ear redden.

“What’s up with that, if you don’t mind me asking,” Kyungsoo asks, reaching out for his beer before gulping it down.

Chanyeol frowns, “It’s really none of your business, y’know.”

“It’s not, but I’m just curious. It’s not often that I get to see Byun Baekhyun and the one moment I see him, he gets into a fight with his ex.”

“Hold up,” Chanyeol looks sharply at Kyungsoo, “You know Baekhyun?”

“I’ve been following his work for years,” Kyungsoo smiles, “I’m a fashion major, you see. And I’m a big fan of his. Hell, this sweater is from his latest line,” Kyungsoo proudly shows his sweater, “I wanted his autograph but he stormed out so early I couldn’t do that.”

There’s no judgment in Kyungsoo’s voice. As the matter of fact, Kyungsoo seems to find the entire situation funny. Still, Chanyeol feels compelled to apologize.

“Sorry.”

“For?”

“If it weren’t for me, you’d get his auto… graph…” Chanyeol trails off once he realises how silly he sounds, “I don’t quite know why I’m sorry but sorry anyway.”

Kyungsoo chuckles at that.

Great, now he probably thinks that Chanyeol’s an idiot.

“You’re cute. I can see why Baekhyun likes you.”

“Liked.” Chanyeol corrects him, “He doesn’t feel that way about me anymore, if you can’t already tell.”

Kyungsoo doesn’t say anything. Instead, he simply looks like Chanyeol like he’s trying to read the depth of his soul. Chanyeol wonders if he does that a lot. Or is it just the way his eyes are so round that it feels like he’s reading him when he’s really just looking at him like any normal person would.

“Are you a model too?” Kyungsoo asks. It’s clear that he understands that the topic about Baekhyun makes Chanyeol uncomfortable, so he shifts the conversation to another direction.

“No,” Chanyeol laughs, “I’m a marketing director.”

“Oh?”

“Why do you look so surprised?”

Kyungsoo rubs the back of his neck, “It’s just… unexpected, I guess? I always think that directors have this intimidating, scary aura around them and-”

“And I don’t look the part?”

“Well, no,” Kyungsoo replies bluntly, “You look really… approachable. If you don’t, I wouldn’t approach you at the first place.”

“I’m a marketing director, Kyungsoo. It’s my job to be appealing to people.” Chanyeol smiles. Kyungsoo then orders the waitress to bring them more beer.

“I know. You do appeal to people, though. But my first thought was you’re a model,” Kyungsoo says, eyes gazing at Chanyeol from head to toe, “I guess it’s the height.”

Chanyeol laughs, “I get that a lot, actually. But no, I’m too awkward to be a model. I can’t pose even to save my life.”

“Well, I’m sure that there’s no way you’re worse than me. I freeze when people try to take my picture – it’s reflex.”

“I guess we’re just not born to be models.”

The waitress then comes with two jugs of beer. Both Chanyeol and Kyungsoo then chat about their lives. Chanyeol learns that Kyungsoo is in his final year of university and is doing both internship during the weekdays and part time jobs during the weekends. He also learns that Kyungsoo is older than both Jongin and Sehun, but he’s still in university because he had to stall his education to help his sick mother get treatment. He only gets to pursue his studies after his mother had passed, and although everyone in his class is younger than him, and it seems too late for him to get his degree, Kyungsoo doesn’t let it get him down because despite the difficulties, he’s just happy that he’s finally pursuing his dreams and learning things that he loves.

Chanyeol then tells him about his job, about Sehun and Jongin, and about Baekhyun. He doesn’t go into details but Kyungsoo gets the gist of it anyway. To Chanyeol’s relief, Kyungsoo doesn’t press the subject further and just listens.

Chanyeol realises that Kyungsoo is a great listener.

They talk until the closing time. As they step outside, Chanyeol feels lighter and happier than before.

Kyungsoo helps Chanyeol get a cab, and before Chanyeol gets into the cab, Kyungsoo stops him and asks, “I… I don’t usually do this but…” he fidgets, “I really enjoy talking to you so m – may I ask for your number?”

Chanyeol smiles.

As he sits at the back of the cab, he checks his phone and sees a text from Kyungsoo.

Kyungsoo: Thanks for tonight.

Chanyeol: no problem! i had a great time!

Chanyeol then puts the phone inside his pocket as he stares outside the window. He let his mind wander for a bit, and then he feels vibration in his pocket, so he takes his phone out.

Kyungsoo: I hope to see you again soon.

Chanyeol: me too. just set the date, i’ll be there.

//

Baekhyun sits on the couch, fidgeting. He glances at his watch, feeling even more and more anxious when it’s getting really late and Chanyeol has not come back yet.

Where the is he?

Baekhyun has sent him texts asking him to come back because it’s getting late. That he’s not mad anymore and he’s resolved everything he’s feeling (he hasn’t, but he’s not gonna say that to Chanyeol) and he’s worried when Chanyeol’s not here yet. He knows that Chanyeol is a grown man but they’re in a foreign place  – so excuse him for being a little worried.

And for those reason, Baekhyun almost jumps out of his skin when he hears the door open and Chanyeol walks in.

“Where the hell have you been?” he exclaims, jumping out of the couch before walking towards Chanyeol. Chanyeol towers over him, but Baekhyun has never been the one to be intimidated by that.

“… out?”

“You couldn’t call? Couldn’t reply to my text? Your last text was three hours ago, Chanyeol! No news from you since then!” Baekhyun punches Chanyeol’s shoulder, “Do you know how worried I was? You dumbo!”

“I’m okay, Baekhyun. I know how to take care of myself.”

“I know you can, but you should’ve told me where you were! The last text you sent, you said you’re coming back in an hour but no news from you for the next three!” Baekhyun says, frustrated, “We’re not familiar with this town, Chanyeol. What was I supposed to think? What if you got robbed? Or kidnapped? Or-”

“But I’m okay, aren’t I?” Chanyeol interrupts, stopping Baekhyun, “I’m just – I really don’t want to fight, okay? It’s been a long day and all I wanna do is sleep.” He sighs “I’m sorry that I ghosted like that – I won’t do it again.”

Chanyeol looks so tired that Baekhyun doesn’t have the heart to keep arguing any longer. He nods, so Chanyeol gives him a tired smile before ruffling his hair. Chanyeol then makes his way to the bathroom to take a shower and Baekhyun settles on the couch. He pulls the blanket over him, up to his cheeks, but sleep won’t come no matter what. He blinks owlishly at the ceiling, still thinking about the incident at the restaurant.

Baekhyun almost jumps when Chanyeol get out of the bathroom and makes his way to the bed. He sees Baekhyun is still awake, and he asks, “You sure you don’t want the bed?”

“No, I’m okay.” Baekhyun says, “You should sleep. We have an early day tomorrow.”

“Yeah, okay.”

Baekhyun hears Chanyeol settle on the bed and turns off the light. It’s pitch dark except for the moonlight illuminating through the curtains.

Baekhyun wonders how Chanyeol can feel so far when he’s so near.

“Chanyeol?”

“Hm?” Baekhyun hears Chanyeol’s voice, he sounds confused, probably is about to fall asleep.

“I’m sorry for what I said at the restaurant.” Baekhyun mutters, “I shouldn’t have asked you that question, and I definitely shouldn’t have gotten mad at you. It was immature of me, and I’m sorry.”

Chanyeol sighs, “It’s okay. I’m sorry too.”

Baekhyun heaves a sigh of relief, but before he’s about to close his eyes, he hears Chanyeol say, “Baekhyun, just know, there’s nothing wrong with you. Please don’t think that I broke up with you because you’re lacking something. You’re not. To me, you’re perfect,” Chanyeol pauses, “Letting you go was the hardest decision I ever had to make.”

“But it was the right one.” Baekhyun says.

There’s a beat of silence.

“We won’t be where we are now if we stayed together. You know that, right?”

“I know. I just wish…” Baekhyun feels his heart grow heavy, “I just wish things are a little different, that’s all.”

I wish you’re still mine and I’m still yours.

“You’re my first love, Baekhyun. You’ll always be special, and I’ll always love you. Don’t forget that, okay?”

Baekhyun doesn’t answer.

After a while, he says, “And I’ll always love you too.”

Chanyeol doesn’t answer. Baekhyun hears his soft snoring, indicating that Chanyeol has fallen asleep.

Baekhyun turns to his side and closes his eyes.

I’ll always love you.