CHAPTER SIX – SHE LOVES HIM

'Breaking News’

‘BTS member Min Yoongi swept up in yet another scandal. the K-pop rapper A.K.A. SUGA from Bangtan Sonyeondan.

Was caught at the new night club, situated in the heart of Gangnam, he was seen drinking excessively and was also seen leaving the night club intoxicated and with yet another Idol, who was seen holding onto his arm.

Just last week he was seen with Apink member Kim Namjoo, this week he was seen making out with ex 4-minute member Kwon Sohyun, a source close to the pair says they were looking quite cosy.

Fans of the idol from BTS are concerned about the Idol health, they have discovered his downward spiral, started three months after the scandal of Suran. No word from Bighit.'

Comments:

* I think those girls are just trying to get attention because this is the only way a female idol can make it. Hahaha how sad! Hahaha *

* Min Yoongi can do better, than those ex wannabes *

* I think he and Suran Unnie must’ve been dating, and he was forced to break up, maybe he is heartbroken… my poor SUGA, I’ll come and comfort you. Hehe!! *

I frowned at the article that was thrown in front of me.

Don’t people have anything better to do, I ignored it and carried on looking through my laptop.

I could feel them all staring at me as they stood behind.

“Hyung we talked about this” Jimin said.

Park Ji Min.

His voice so soft like a baby. Now he sounds like he’s been crying, I ignored him like I always do, and its funny cause he was always the first to speak, even though, I would always ignore him. He hates backing down, I’ll give him that.

This wasn't the first time they’ve all tried to talk to me, it was a daily routine for them.

Eat, practice, argue, rest, practice, argue, annoy me, eat, sleep, then repeat.

This time, however, was different, because this time it seems that they bought someone else along. Someone I thought was planning on never talking to me.

Jeon Jeong Guk.

“You need to eat,” Jungkook spoke

The last time I heard his voice was when he was throwing punches at me and swearing that he would never talk to me.

“I thought you weren't talking to me,” I said, wishing he would follow through on his word.

He scoffed, “I wasn't”

The Maknae is not only stubborn but he also likes to act like he is the eldest. When all he is, is a scared little boy.

“Hyung you need to eat,” Taehyung said,

Kim Tae Hyung.

He sat down beside me grabbing my hand. “It's been four weeks now” his voice so deep it was mesmerizing, but it was his smile that I always looked at.

His smile. It was never the smile I knew, this smile wasn’t as genuine because it never reached his eyes, you could tell when his smiles were genuine, or when he just didn't know how to feel, because Taehyung was the most sensitive out of us all, and he didn’t know how to express his feeling, the way he wanted it too.

“I need to finish this” I snapped, pulling my hand away from his grasp. Taehyung flinched at my voice, but he was still smiling, even though he was hurt that I pulled away from him, his eyes, it was always his eyes that gave away everything.

“Yoongi,”

Kim Seok Jin.

I knew that rasp, out of breath voice. His voice holds so much authority, yet somehow all I hear, is concern and for a moment, I almost felt sorry for him. Almost.

Hyung is the eldest and always saw it upon himself to be the parent figure, as if we were his responsibility, not knowing that we were all old enough to make our own mistakes.

“Stop beating yourself over this”

Kim Nam Joon.

Our fearless leader with his strong deep voice, He’s our leader, who, right now did not know how to handle, my current situation.

How could he, he needs to be in my situation, to understand my situation. But since he’s our leader, what he said was law.

“Why not, I deserve this,” I said,

“No, you don’t!”

Jung Ho Seok.

Always the optimistic one of us all, his childlike behaviour, it must be fun to never take anything seriously.

I stopped looking at my laptop before closing my eyes.

This is what I do, I push people away or I hurt them, so they can stay away from me, I don’t deserve them, I don’t deserve any—

“Lisa told us,” Namjoon said,

My whole body tensed at that, one word, that one name. The only name.

Lisa.

“She told us, she told us the whole thing, the real reason” Jungkook spoke, I opened my eyes and laughed.

“Now what, you're here to apologize,” I said, Jungkook scoffed.

My back was still to them, except for Taehyung who refused to move away from me.

“Hyung, we're sorry, but it's not like you were defending yourself,” Taehyung said, placing his hand on my shoulder, his voice so soft, it almost threw me off.

“So, what. Is this your way of justifying yourself by putting the blame on me” I snapped at Taehyung shrugging his hand off my shoulder, he stepped away, looking down at the floor avoiding my eyes.

I know he was on the verge of crying, but I wasn’t in any mood to comfort someone. I turned around to look at everyone in the room, they all looked guilty. As they should.

“No, we just didn't understand” Jimin whispered

“So, you accuse me, because you didn’t understand, sounds about right,” I said looking at him.

Jin stepped forward in front of Jimin, like the loving mother he is, protecting his cub, who was cowering behind Jin.

“You loved—”

“Love,” I said, interrupting Jin “I still, love her”

“Is that why you're seen with a new girl every week?” Namjoon said, our fearless leader, he’s finally stepping up. Who would’ve thought he would find his words.

“Yes. No. Who knows?” I whispered.

“Why are you putting yourself through this. You both love each other. I don't understand why it's so hard—”

“That's why because you don't understand,” I said, interrupting Hoseok who was also avoiding my eyes.

“Then help us understand,” Jungkook said, standing near the doorway, along with Jin and Namjoon who were the only ones, who weren’t running scared when I look at them.

“Help us understand, why you made your decision, stop leaving us in the dark.”

Jungkook said, raising his voice.

“You want to know why, why I told the person I love. To follow her dreams is that, not reason enough,” I stared at them all “I told her, to follow her dreams because I love her. She chose me and I said no, and every night I replay that scene in my head and every night, I say yes but I don't want to think about it, so I throw myself in anything… and anyone I can get my hands on because a moment I am left to think on my own, is a moment I'm scared that I might ruin everything.”

“I ed up, but I can’t take back what I said, and even if I could, I wouldn’t, I love watching her perform, I love seeing her on stage, I love…” I stopped talking, my voice cracking.

Understanding.

That’s all I saw when I stared at them, I smiled closing my eyes.

Jungkook stood there staring right at me, then he stepped forward and he surprised me when he grabbed my shoulder and pulled me up into a hug.

Four weeks ago, everyone was trying to pull him off me, he was ready to murder me, he followed through on his promise. I didn't stop him or blame him for doing so. I would have done the same.

“I'm sorry Hyung. I am.” He said, patting my back

“I might hate your decision right now but in time, I will understand because you mean a lot to me Hyung and all I want is for you to be happy… give it time and you will be and I will be right beside you, we all will…” He finished.

“If it means you get to be happy, then yes because you being happy is all that matters to me” she smiled.

I felt myself slowly breaking apart when I felt everyone surround me.

“I miss her so much” I cried out. Grabbing hold of Jungkooks jacket.

“She misses you too” Taehyung whispered, almost knowingly, almost as if he knew.

“Hyung, you need to pull yourself together, how do you think Lisa feels seeing these tabloids” and then it hit me. While I was off drinking my pain away with any girl that I saw, what was Lisa thinking…

‘That what we shared, meant nothing to me, that I wasted three and a half years of her life for a guy who doesn’t truly love her’ why shouldn’t she think that. I’m a ing coward, who doesn’t deserve her. I don’t deserve Lalisa Manoban.

~~~~~~~3 Years Later~~~~~~~

“Here he comes!” Taehyung yelled, jumping up and down

Namjoon quickly grabbed him when people started staring at us. Taehyung pouted at Namjoon, who sighed before letting him go.

“He looks so manly in his uniform,” Hoseok said, we all agreed when Jin finally stood in front of us.

Taehyung and Jungkook were the first to ignore the rules of the base camp and went in for a group hug, followed by everyone else, I stood to the side, watching them all cry and hug Jin, who was trying to stick to the rules.

“Hyung you look so healthy,” Jimin said, once he pulled away and they all followed leaving Jin standing in the middle of everyone.

I stepped forward slapping Jin on the shoulder “You look good Hyung” I said, smiling when he burst out in tears, he was standing there crying in his military uniform.

“I didn't think you guys were all coming I thought it was only Hobi, Tae and Kook,” Jin said, he glanced at me and I knew what he meant without him even having to say anything.

“Don’t worry Hyung, I—” Taehyung said only to stop when we all heard loud screaming males.

I already knew who they were screaming for.

Kim Jisoo.

The day Jin and Jisoo announced that they were a couple was the day the whole K-pop world changed. Everyone wanted to know what they were doing, what they were up to, how long have they dated and were they the only couple out of the two groups.

The two were happy and I couldn’t be more happy for the two, Everyone was a wreck when the news broke out with photos of the two that were leaked, the news was like a hurricane, Blackpink had just released their new song and we just finished the promotion for ‘Fake Love.’

We lost a lot of fans and gained a lot of enemies, but Jin was happy he didn't have to hide the fact that he was in love. Jisoo was strong no matter how many backlashes she got, she stayed strong and I think that’s what everyone liked about her. I've never seen an idol gain so many fans from a dating scandal. Then, Hyung went and joined the services.

Jin and Jisoo became the ‘It Couple’. the talk of the town, for nearly a whole year. Everyone slowly accepted the two, everyone had no choice but too.

I looked at the entryway to see Jisoo and… I froze.

Lisa.

The first year after our breakup was hard. We avoided each other every time, award shows were the hardest, trying to act like everything was okay when all I wanted to do was scream to the world that I love Lalisa Manoban and hold her in my arms.

She even avoided talking to my members and they all knew why, but it was kook who took it the worst, he understood, and he held no grudge towards it.

The second year she slowly started talking to them, it started small, a simple hello. Then it slowly went back to normal, for them, but for me, we both decided to move on. We didn’t say anything we just knew. The one thing I miss the most was hearing her voice, the way we talked with each other, listened to each other, I miss her laugh, her smile.

That’s what I miss… I miss everything.

The two stopped when they saw us, Jisoo looked over at Lisa, who was standing nearly five feet away from me, and she was smiling, as if seeing me didn't affect her, but it did, I could always tell when she was nervous her hands would always clasp together in front of her as she played with her fingers.

“Annyeong,” they both said bowing, I could feel my member’s eyes on me as we all bowed back towards them.

“Sit, everyone please sit” Jin called, seeing that everyone was just standing there awkwardly, and I could see that a lot of people were staring at us, more like I could feel their eyes on Lisa, as they openly stared at her as if she was some fresh meat. She wasn’t she was more…

We all sat around the table Jin, Jisoo, Lisa, Hoseok, and Jungkook sat on one side Namjoon, me, Taehyung and Jimin sat opposite them.

Jisoo and Lisa bought food, I watched as their manager Unnie placed the food on the table, with Lisa helping her.

Lisa was even more beautiful, her hair was black and long, and she had side bangs that really suited her, whenever she bent forward, her hair would cover half her face, I was holding back, squeezing my hands tightly because I was tempted to tuck it behind her ear.

Manager Unnie smiled at everyone handing out plates, before glaring at me and putting my plate in front of me, before she walked off. She still hates me.

No one, no one thought to bring food for our Hyung. We all drove here in separate cars, and not one of us bought food, for our Hyung, who at the moment looked happier to see the food that Jisoo and Lisa bought than us.

“Did you cook this all” Jin asked, looking at Jisoo who was smiling before she shook her head

“Mianhae, Oppa,” Jisoo said, then she glanced at Lisa.

Lisa smiled, “Unnie was too tired because she had a photo-shoot, and I don't really know what you like so, I cooked everything”

Her voice, interviews, music shows, they weren't doing her justice, nothing ever would, until she talks right in front of you and the way she smiles.

I stared at her and she was still smiling at Jin, who was smiling back at her.

I hate you Hyung.

“Everyone don’t eat it, it’s poison,” Jungkook teased breaking the silence that seemed to follow whenever Lisa spoke.

Everyone stared at Jungkook, who was smirking,

“YAH!”

Lisa yelled trying to reach pass Hoseok who was laughing at Lisa trying to hit Jungkook, while Jungkook was laughing at her attempts to hit him.

At least they were able to fix their friendship, I wish…

“Masisseoyo!”

We all looked at Jin to see him already eating,

We all stared at each other before we all broke out laughing, but eventually we all followed after him.

I looked at the food…

It's Korean dishes, all Korean dishes.

------------------------------

“Hey, Yoongi, what's your favourite food?” Lisa asked, sitting on top of the kitchen bench, while I stood next to her, cutting up fruits, I looked at her and she popped a grape in .

“Why do you want to know?” I asked, going back to cutting up the apples in slices.

“Just curious,” she said, swinging her legs back and forth, grabbing another of my freshly cut up fruit, and popping it into .

“Meat,” I said, she laughed

“I'm being serious” she pouted, grabbing another fruit and popping it into , and by the rate that she was going at, I was sure that me cutting up the fruit was going to be a waste of time.

I stared at her for a while, then I smiled “kimchi, bulgogi your average Korean dishes”

“What about Thai food do you like it?”

“No,”

She frowned “But you always eat my Thai food,” she said

“Because you don't know how to make anything else,” I said, laughing when she slapped me on my shoulder.

I put the knife down and stepped in between her legs my hands resting on her thighs, trying to get her attention because she kept avoiding me, looking anywhere but me.

“Why do you want to know?” I asked when I finally got her attention.

“Because one day, I'm going to cook for you, and it's going to be everything you like, all your favourite food,” she said,

I smirked, “Then you should be on the list as well, your number one,” I said, laughing at her red cheeks, she covered her face with her hands, “What? I like eating you” I laughed when she slapped my shoulder again.

“Mark my words Min Yoongi, you will like my cooking and you will ask for more and—” she smirked cupping my face and leaning forward, “—I like eating you too,” she whispered.

“GROSS!”

Lisa pulled back and we both glanced at the doorway to see a very angry and embarrassed Chae.

“I came to check if the fruits were done,” she said glaring at us before she stormed off.

We both looked at each other and laughed.

“So, where were we,” she said, her breath fanning across my lips.

------------------------------

“This is really good Lisa, I didn't know you could make Korean dishes,” Namjoon said, smiling at Lisa.

“I asked my dad. He helped me, we helped each other,” she said,

I grabbed a chopstick and went straight for the kimchi, followed by the bulgogi, everything was delicious, everything tasted as if it belonged in a restaurant.

She really did it, I wanted to tell her everything was amazing, that she— I looked up and she was staring right at me, but she quickly looked away.

~~~~~~~

I sat there, listening to everyone talk and laugh and I didn't say a single thing, how could I when all I wanted to hear was her voice, her laugh, to see her smile.

I looked up to see that everyone was now staring at me.

“What?” I said, eating the japchae, it was my favourite, they all were.

Jimin laughed shaking his head, “I said, that you'll be here soon,” he said, I just nodded, since I have no idea what they were talking about.

“Oh, yeah” I replied.

“Hyung were talking about your services,” Jungkook said,

“Oh, yeah… four months from now,”

In four months, Namjoon and I will both be here doing our services as well—

“Your phone Hyung”

I looked at Taehyung who was looking at my phone that was going off. I quickly grabbed it, glancing at the caller ID.

Namjoon scoff when he saw who was calling me.

I stared at him, then back at my phone, “I have to take this” I said, standing up and excusing myself.

“She really can't take no for an answer” Namjoon muttered under his breath as I walked off to a quiet area. I looked at my phone, then it stopped ringing, but it didn’t take long before it started to go off again,

“What do you want?” I growled.

“Oppa”

“Don't call me that!” I said I hate when she calls me that and she knows it, yet she still does it.

“Oppa can we talk about this, I know I screwed up but it's not like you noticed me, I was just someone to fill up the empty space,”

“Look I screwed up, you screwed up, let's move on,” I groaned, I could feel a headache coming.

“Oppa, please we can make this work”

“No, we can't, because it was never going to work, you were right, you were just someone to fill up an empty space,” I said

“You served your purpose. So, I’m calling it quits, you cheating on me was okay, we're not even a ing couple,” I growled, now I could hear her crying.

! I’m a .

“I don't even know her, and I hate her, was I ever going to be someone you could rely on, would you ever love me the way you loved her. what happened to her?” she sobbed over the phone.

“Nothing happened, just like how nothing would have ever happened between us, so stop calling me,” I said, hanging up. I leaned back against the wall, groaning in frustration, closing my eyes.

------------------------------

“Would you ever cheat on me?” I asked Lisa who was throwing her clothes around her room, she stopped and looked back at me, concern was written all over her face before she shrugged her shoulders.

“If you give me a reason too, I might” she smiled.

I stared at her; the confusion was clearly written on my face.

“What kind of reason?” I asked as she carried on throwing her clothes around her room, it was already messy, so it made no difference.

“If you weren't giving me attention,” she said laughing.

“Seriously?”

“Look, I'm a very needy girl,” she said looking back at me, “Good thing you give me the right attention” she smiled, I shook my head.

“And?”

“If… if you were thinking about someone else, and I'm right in front of you,” she said.

“How would you know, what if I was just thinking about work”, I said

She stopped and looked back at me, “A girl knows, she knows when a guy is thinking about someone else, call it intuition or something, but a guy will have this look and the girl will know” she said, then she threw my jacket at me.

I laughed moving my jacket aside, “The girl will know? You watch too many dramas,” I said.

“Don't worry, Yoongi, I would never cheat on you.” she said, smirking at me “Who else am I going to borrow these amazing clothes from?” she said, looking down at the shirt she was wearing. I thought it looked familiar.

I frowned, “It's nice to know I'm being used for something or better yet, just go buy it yourself”

She shook her head, “Why should I when my boyfriend can clearly buy it and I can wear it whenever I want,” she said

Well, I did say, I liked her wearing my clothes.

I stood up holding on to my jacket that I came over to get for our tour in Japan,

She smiled, “Remember don't do anything stupid, have fun, don't bully the Maknaes,”

She walked closer towards me, her hands going around my neck “And most importantly. Don't forget me,” she finished with her lips on mine.

------------------------------

“I could never forget you” I whispered, staring up at the high ceilings, I sighed closing my eyes, I could never forget…

3 years may have passed, but I still hold memories of you.

3 years and I could never commit to a relationship, no matter how hard I tried to move on.

3 years and all I do is still think about you, dream about you.

3 years and I have written 23 songs about you and 14 of the songs have awards to prove, how much of a wreck I am without you.

3 years and I still hold on to that small black velvet box…

“Are you okay?”

I froze, my eyes flew open, that voice. Her voice, I could recognize that soft voice anywhere, it’s embedded in my head, my heart, my soul.

Lalisa Manoban, there she stood, staring right at me.

Beautiful.

I didn’t really take note of what she was wearing, until now.

White suits her more than anything.

I nodded “Yeah, I'm fine,” I smiled, staring at her.

She smiled but it never reached her eyes. This smile was her. I’m unsure if I should smile or leave. I knew all her smiles.

“Sorry, I just… I'm sorry” she murmured softly, before turning away from me.

Stop her.

“Lisa,” I called out, I can’t believe I found my voice, I was glad I didn’t stutter or scream as she stopped, her back facing me.

“The food… The food was really good. I liked it,” I said, she stood there not moving or saying anything, but she was nervous, and I didn’t need to face her to know.

“I'm glad you like it” she whispered so softly before she walked off.

I watched her disappear from my sight.

I wanted to stop you, I wanted to tell you, what I really wanted to say,

That I miss you, that every day, I think about you. That everything reminds me of you. That I wish I could hold you in my arms… Ask, how are you? Are you happy? Does he make you happy? I hope he's treating you better than I ever could.

*****SPECIAL CHAPTER*****

(LISA P.O.V.)

“LISA!”

I lay flat on my bed staring up at the white ceiling, ignoring Jisoo Unnies calls, I groaned reaching out for my phone.

14%, ! I forgot to charge it last night, I looked at the time,

07:27.

Jisoo Unnie, my personal alarm clock, and knowing Jisoo Unnie as I do, her next step in waking me up, is to storm in my room and annoy me until I wake up.

I groaned, throwing my blankets over my head.

Ever since Jisoo Unnie and I went to go visit Jin Oppa, I couldn't sleep. All I kept thinking about was him.

Min Yoongi,

Why are you still in my head?

------------------------------

I wanted to talk to him, hear his voice, hear more than just two words from him, but when he stood up and walked off to take his call…I just…

Then I heard what Namjoon Oppa say, Jin Oppa slapped his shoulder before he glanced over at me. Then, they all looked at me, as if waiting for me to break, as if waiting for something to happen, I was fine. I keep telling myself I am, because I am, I’m fine

Jisoo Unnie suddenly stood up “We should go, don’t you have a recording session today,”

That’s a lie. “It’s okay, I can wait,” I said, pinching Jisoo Unnie arm, and forcing her to sit back down. I almost squealed when she pinched my thigh.

“Well, I'm heading back,” Tae Oppa suddenly said, he stood up, staring right at me, he’s been looking at me since I’ve arrived, and I’ve been trying to avoid his eyes, knowing why he was staring at me.

“I have a shoot this afternoon, I can take you back,” Tae Oppa said, I know what he was doing, he glanced at his watch, then glanced back at me.

I’m in trouble.

“No thanks’, I'm good,” I said, smiling at Tae Oppa, who was now glaring back at me.

I’m in deep trouble.

“Although, I do have a recording session, with Mino-oppa that I have to get to,”

Why do all my lies always involve Mino Oppa? Mianhae Oppa.

I could feel Jisoo Unnies eyes on me.

“If you don't mind,” I said to Tae Oppa, he shrugged his shoulders, stepping away from his seat.

He’s going to growl me; I can feel it… I deserve it.

“I'm just going to go freshen up, I'll meet you at the front,” I found myself lying again.

I just wanted to see him.

Tae Oppa stared at me for a while, before he nodded, walking away. Tae Oppa is my guardian angel who watches over me because I tend to do stupid things.

I went around saying my goodbyes.

Saying goodbye to Jin Oppa was hard because his hugs always felt like home and I always miss him since he is the only one who can calm Jisoo Unnie down… sometimes, but his main purpose in life is to stay with Jisoo Unnie, forever.

With Kookie, we never hug, we always did our, ‘not so secret’ handshake. He had grown a lot taller and very handsome and he is well known as the international player, breaking hearts, left, right, and centre, but I was still the only one, who could ruffle his hair and get away with it. I laughed when he pushed me away when I messed up his hair, but I caught him smiling. 

Hobi Oppa is the best to hug, he makes you feel safe, because he loved hugs, just like Jimin Oppa, but I could never hug him for too long because a certain, blonde haired beauty who was out filming for her new musical drama would have my head.

Yes, the new face musical actress, Park Chaeyoung, is scary, when she’s jealous, I also think, Jimin Oppa likes it when Chae gets jealous because he hates being the only jealous person in their relationship, Chae tells me everything, even though Junhoe is always the first to know.

Joon Oppa, I loved saying goodbye to him last. He’s a brother, I wish I had.

I waved goodbye to them, walking towards the hallway that I saw him go through.

I froze when I heard his voice.

“I could never forget you” he whispered,

Was he thinking about her?

I stared at him leaning against the wall, looking up at the ceiling, holding his phone out.

He was.

What am I doing here, I shouldn’t be here, I should—

“Are you okay?” I asked,

What the hell’s wrong with me? What was I trying to gain from this? Was I trying to break his thoughts from her… I wasn't jealous. I wasn't. I’m not. Not even close.

“Yeah, I'm fine.” He said, he smiled, staring at me.

That smile, I miss his smile, the way—I shouldn’t be here, what was I thinking, of course, he's fine, he's happy, he's in a relationship, he has moved on.

So, have I. What am I doing?

“Sorry, I just… I'm sorry,”

What was I hoping would happen?

I could feel my cheeks heating up, I quickly turned around and walked back to—

“Lisa”

I stopped, he said my name, hearing him call my name.

I miss him, I miss him saying my name.

“The food… the food was really good. I liked it,” he said,

I stood there, not moving, my hands were clasped together in front of me. I smiled; I knew he would like it… it was all for him.

“I'm glad you like it” I whispered, walking away.

I wanted to stay, I wanted to stay where I was and listen to him, talk with him, tell him…

What I really wanted to say, I wanted to say… to tell you how much I've missed you. How I woke up thinking that I would see you today. I made this food for you. That I always think about you, if you’re eating, if you’re getting enough sleep. I wanted to ask if you’re happy. Are you happy? If you're happier with her… if… Do you think about me? As much as I think about you.

------------------------------

“YAHH! LISA!” Jisoo Unnie called out again,

I didn’t want her to see me like this, I’m a mess. I rolled out under my blankets, over my bed and landing on the floor, my hands catching my fall as I quickly and quietly shuffled under my bed.

I held my breath when my bedroom door opened,

“Oh, is she already up? Where the hell…” Jisoo muttered, before closing the door. I sighed as I laid there, under my bed looking at all the lost items.

“There's my Matte purple lipstick,” I said, reaching out for it, and then I saw it. Something I thought I would never see again.

 'My Bracelet'

I thought I lost it, over a year ago, I remember crying for months over it. I grabbed it and shuffled out from under my bed.

I stared at the bracelet in my palm.

The very bracelet that Yoongi gave me, it had the initials L and Y on it and two stars on either end. Blinks thought it meant 'love you' but it wasn't, my fingertips tracing the charms, mainly the ‘Y’.

------------------------------

“Oh. My. Gosh. You’re so cheesy,” I laughed, smiling at the bracelet that he gave me, well more like threw at me in a parcel box.

“Whatever,” he said, I smiled at him as he looked away, then he shook his head,

He turned to leave, probably from embarrassment.

Cute.

I quickly jumped up from his bed and jumped on his back before he walked further away, luckily, he was in close reach for my arms to go over his shoulder and my legs wrapped around his waist. His balance and hold on me is… any other day I would have congratulated him on his skills, but I had other things on my mind, well only one.

He groaned “You're heavy,”

“Really? Good, then you can suffer more,”

He chuckled as I hugged him close to me and kissing his cheek.

“I love it,” I said, admiring the bracelet that was around my wrist “but what's the occasion?” I asked

I knew what the occasion was, I just wanted to see his reaction.

“It's nothing,” He said, looking disappointed.

He says that my smile is his weakness, well, him pouting and looking sad is mine, wait, and his gummy smile, no… his hair when it’s ruffled just right after we just had the most amazing—

I shook my head, feeling my cheeks heat up. I wish I could read people’s mind, that would be a cool superpower.

I smiled, “Happy one-year anniversary,” I whispered against his cheek, I felt him smile…

I love you Yoongi.

I pointed at his closet, “It's nothing major, but I thought of you when I saw it,” I said, he walked towards his closet, with me still clinging onto his back.

“Why did you put it in my—"

He stopped talking, once he opened the door and he stood there frozen.

I smiled, “I'm glad you like it,” I said, staring at my bracelet, I’m never taking this off.

------------------------------

“Lisa?”

I looked up from the floor to see Jisoo Unnie standing there, she looked concerned, and I knew why, when I felt tears against my cheeks.

I quickly wiped it away, but it was already too late.

“I'm okay” I quickly said.

She ignored what I said as she walked further into my room and sat down next to me, pulling me into a hug.

“It’s okay Lisa,” she whispered, my head leaning on her shoulder when she pulled back.

“I thought I was fine; I mean it's been years so why is he still in my head” I cried

“I'm happy, I've moved on, he makes me happy, so why am I thinking about someone else,” I cried into her shoulder, she rubbed my back.

“Because he was your first love, no one can forget their first love, and…” I looked at her, she smiled wiping my tears with her thumb.

“Because you still love him”