Growing Pain
Growing PainA/N: It hurts when you fall for your best friend. It hurts when you thought he/she felt the same but the truth is that they never did.
This is pure fiction. I loved KhunFany(they were like the perfect couple) and I don't hate Nichkhun, but I had to use characters for what I'm feeling :3
This is a one-shot. I wrote this because I was angry lol. Dense people drives me nuts.
God bless.
///
Tiffany felt her whole body trembling.
Nichkhun had called her after not contacting with her for a month.
'Meet me at our usual place.'
So she went to the coffee shop they used to hang out everyday together.
Tiffany was angry.
She wanted to scream at Nichkhun so much because a month without him was just agony. But she tried to understand. And then she saw him at their usual table, looking out the window absentmindedly, a cup and a mug placed in the brown rectangular table in fron of him. Tiffany felt her body move and she was in front of the boy she loved, breathing heavily.
"Khun..." Her voice was huskier than it usually was, since she had just came from a long day of recording songs with her fellow members.
It was already 6.
Nichkhun slowly looked at her and smiled, "Tiffany, sit down." That's it? After so long, that's it? Tiffany was boiling. But she stayed silent and sat down, hoping to hear the boy's reasons. Past the table, he slid a cup of coffee towards her. "Here, drink up." It wasn't caramel coffee. It was black. Tiffany did not like this coffee at all.
It was bitter, and Tiffany hated bitter things.
"So how was your day, Fany?"
Fany.
He didn't call her Tiffany.
He didn't call her Stephanie.
Tiffany noticed the changed of tone when he said her name. It used to be sweet, it used to make butterflies in her stomach, it used to make her feel like she was on cloud nine-
The lingering emotions were gone.
She couldn't feel the sweetness of her name being called when it rolled out of Nichkhun's tongue.
She stayed silent and Nichkhun bit his lower lip, also lowering his gaze, afraid to look at the girl in front of him. He knew that she wanted to know why he hadn't contacted her in a month.
He knew this was the time.
"Why?" Her voice was hoarse and Nichkhun looked up only to find Tiffany struggling not to cry. He felt his heart shatter into millions of pieces.
He hated seeing her cry.
So why was he doing this?
"Tiffany..."
"Please...Just tell me why...Did I do something wrong?" Tiffany's tears were falling and she shut her eyes tightly, her hands balled into fists. Nichkhun reached for his handkerchief and gave it to the girl who was silently crying.
Tiffany's frown deepened. Nichkhun never bothered to give her a handkerchief. He had only used his hands to wipe her tears away and she wanted that. She wanted that more than anything or anyone's comfort.
So she didn't accept it.
Nichkhun's gaze softened and hid his handkerchief away."Tiffany..." When he retreated his arms away, Tiffany quickly held his bigger hand in her smaller ones. "Khun...Call me like you used to...Please..."
But Nichkhun couldn't do that.
And what hurts the most was when he carefully took his hand out of Tiffany's grasp. "Khun...I love you..." Tiffany stared at him with her eyes, the eyes that made Nichkhun fall in love with her.
The eyes that made him feel like someone was always there for him.
The eyes that were filled with hope.
A hope that Nichkhun couldn't give.
Nichkhun felt his eyes getting teary as well as he looked down and heard a squeak from Tiffany.
"Tiffany...I can't do this anymore."
'No, you can't...Please don't say that.'
"You know...You know I love you more than anything in this world."
'I know...So please don't say it...Please...'
"But I have to do this.."
'You don't have to! Why?! Why do you have to? Who told you that you have to?!'
Tiffany wanted to yell all those questions at him, but she couldn't say a thing. She was too overwhelmed.
"I'm sorry, Tiffany..."
'No, you promised, Nichkhun you said you won't-'
"I'm breaking up with you."
...
Nichkhun expected the slap that Tiffany suddenly gave him, earning the attentions of unwanted people. She stood up, not caring if they made a scene or not.
"How could you..." Tiffany's heart was in pieces, her make-up already ruined. Her make-up, which she did so hard to, just for Nichkhun but the guy did not even noticed.
"Tiffany, sit down...You're making a scene."
"I don't care!" This was frustrating Tiffany. The brokenness and desperation evident in her voice.
"What did I do wrong, Nichkhun?! I loved you, didn't I? You said you love me too, so why are you doing this?!"
"Tiffany..."
Tiffany slammed her bag on the table, and turned to look at her surroundings, and quickly, the customers and employees went back to what they were doing but she knew that they were listening.
She sat back down quietly, her breathing unsteady. "Nichkhun...Tell me why...Please...My heart is in pieces right now...And it hurts so much."
And that's the same for Nichkhun.
His grip on the mug of black coffee tightened as he glared at the innocent table.
"Tiffany...Nothing's the same as before."
Tiffany scoffed, anger quickly filling her up. "That's because you decided that we needed space, remember? And I agreed for a week. Which you turned into a month of no communication!"
She was furious.
After their week of having space, she went down to JYP Ent. and knocked on 2PM's dorm rooms worriedly, as she couldn't find Nichkhun anywhere.
And she couldn't forget the guilt on their faces as they told her they didn't know where Nichkhun was. Tiffany, being the kind girl she was, accepted that and continued visiting there day after day.
Until Taecyeon finally told her the reason why.
'He cheated on you...'
And her whole world broke down.
She didn't believe it.
She didn't want to.
She believed in her boyfriend.
"I cheated on you..."
But hearing it from him personally was probably the most hurtful thing ever. Tiffany wasn't sure if she was ever going to recover from this heartbreak.
Nichkhun was standing up but Tiffany pulled him back down and forced out a smile. "No...No, Nichkhun, you're lying...You're joking aren't y-you?"
Nichkhun stared at her with pity and he hated himself.
The smile on Tiffany's face wasn't her usual.
It was what he hated the most.
A broken smile.
Nichkhun did it.
He broke her.
"Tiff...I'm so sorry..."
And Nichkhun felt Tiffany's grip on his white polo short loosened and she finally let go. Physically and emotionally.
He stared at her.
She wasn't crying anymore. But Nichkhun could swear that her heart was breaking and he could hear every last piece. The worst part was that he was the reason. He wasn't picking any pieces up.
"You promised..." That's when she cried. Cried with the most vulnerable voice he had ever heard.
"You...You said that you'd take care of me...You told me that you'll never leave me...You told me that even when we fight, you'd stay by my side...Until we get married...Until we get old...You said you would never break my heart....But why is my heart breaking now?"
In the back of Nichkhun's mind, he was punching himself over and over again. But he didn't deserve her.
He didn't deserve her love.
Why did she love him? Why did she believe him?
No.
Why did he hurt her? Why did he took her feelings for granted?
They were friends. They were best friends.
...
"SNSD, this is 2PM. Of course you've heard of them haven't you?"
A choruses of yes were heard across the gym as the boys and girls smiled at each other. Tiffany stayed silent in the corner.
She still hadn't gotten used to speaking Korean yet.
She wasn't fluent and she didn't want to be a laughing stock. She was waiting for Jessica to get back but she was busy talking to a few people and Tiffany felt left out.
"Hey, what are you doing here?"
Tiffany quickly looked up, wide-eyed, as she saw the guy that caught her eye the first time she saw 2PM.
What was his name?
It was a bit hard to pronounce.
"Are you alright?" Concern was evident in the stranger's voice.
Tiffany realized he was speaking fluently in English. "You can speak English?" She blurted out without thinking.
The guy chuckled. "I was speaking to you, just now, wasn't I?" "Oh, right." Tiffany's face flushed in embarrassment.
He sat down besides her and smiled widely as he watched the interactions between the two groups commenced.
"You're from America?"
"Y-Yeah...I can't speak Korean very well so I didn't want to say anything."
"Oh, well that's what I felt when I came here too. I'm from Thailand, but I lived in America for a few years."
Tiffany found herself grinning widely and Nichkhun's eyes widened and he felt himself smile as well.
"Oh, wow. You've such a beautiful smile."
Tiffany's face flushed but she was still smiling. It was one of her weapons after all, so she was proud.
"My name is Nichkhun, a bit hard to pronounce?"
"Yup...Can I just call you Khun?"
Nichkhun stared at her weirdly and Tiffany felt as if she said something wrong. "S-Sorry, we just met and-"
"No, no. It's okay. I like that nickname. No one else has ever called me that before."
"Really? I'm special then! My name is Tiffany."
"A very beautiful name. But I thought it was Stephanie?" He was going through SNSD's profile and saw a Stephanie no Tiffany.
"Oh, I call myself Tiffany..."
Nichkhun chuckled again. "Alright then. But I have to call you something since you have a nickname for me. So I'll call you, Steph."
...
"I know....I know I promised..." Nichkhun's heart was sinking and his voice was failing him. "But you deserved better...So much better than me..."
Tiffany shook her head and smiled sadly.
"But I don't want anyone else...I love you, Khun," Nichkhun flinched at the nickname and Tiffany's tears started forming again. She wasn't a strong person. She was a crybaby.
But who wouldn't cry if they were broken hearted?
"I love you...I want you, no one else...Why can't we talk about this?"
In Tiffany's eyes, she didn't care if someone else was better than Nichkhun. She wanted him. In her eyes, Nichkhun was the best.
She chuckled humorlessly.
What love can do.
"Tiffany, you're getting busy these days, I don't wanna stress-"
"But you're not. You're not stressing me. And we've been busy before. But this never happened." Tiffany bore her eyes into Nichkhun's dark ones and stared intensely.
She hated liars.
And she knew when someone was lying.
"Tell me the truth." Her voice cracked.
And she clenched her fists when tears started streaming down Nichkhun's face and he lowered his head.
"I slept with someone, Tiff..."
...
Tiffany was used to it.
She was used to people lying to her, playing with her feelings, and leaving her.
She was used to it.
But she hoped that Nichkhun was different. He made her love again. But sadly, it was short lived.
1 year and four months felt too short.
Tiffany wanted forever.
If she can't have that, then maybe a lifetime.
She was used to it.
She was used to people walking away from her.
Nichkhun cried silently in his seat and Tiffany stared at him hopelessly, feeling...
absolutely nothing.
"I'm so sorry, Tiffany...I love you but I fell into temptation...I'm sorry, the guilt has been killing me for a month...I didn't know-"
"It's okay..." This time, her voice was a whisper.
Nickhun looked up at her with fear in his eyes.
Tiffany smiled bitterly. "I'm used to it...I just hoped this time it would have been different."
She was used to it.
People walking out of her life.
First, her mom left her.
Second, Jessica left without saying goodbye.
And third, Nichkhun who promised to stay.
They all promised to stay.
But no one did.
And Tiffany had enough.
This time...
She took the coffee Nichkhun ordered for her, stood up and turned her back on the boy. "Thanks for the coffee. I hope to never see you again."
It was cold.
But this time,
She will be the one walking away.
This time, she won't be the one left behind.
She left the boy still dumbfounded and crying.
As she got out of the coffee shop and into her BMW, she sipped from the cup of black coffee.
It was bitter.
Just like her heart.
But the tears finally fell down and all Tiffany could taste was salty tears.
Yet, the coffee's taste lingered in her tongue.
"It was my mistake for loving people more than they loved me..."
But it won't hurt to try one last time, right?
She took out her phone and dialed a familiar number.
Ring, Ring, Ring...
"Yoboseyo?"
"Taetae...I need you."
"Tell me where you are and I'll be there, Ppany." Tiffany's eyes closed and she let out a raspy voice. Taeyeon did not ask her anything. She was glad.
"Don't worry, Ppany, I'm here. I'll always be here.."
And Tiffany felt her walls break down once more.
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