Title: I want to blend in!
Dedicated to: T
Date: 151005
Pairing: Baekhyun/Chanyeol
Rating: G
Word Count: ~2k
Description: Chanyeol can't unsee him.
Warnings: None
Prompt: fanboy!baekhyun, celebrity!chanyeol
Message from Author: You can do it! I'm cheering for you~

Chanyeol will never forget him.

From start of debut he was there, that one large ball-like man that always stood out from all the other small fangirls. Even though Chanyeol never got to see his face, he could recognise the body shape. Girls would shrink away from him, and understandably so, because he is so big it’s hard not to see him, nor unsee him.

He must weigh at least 200 kilograms. Chanyeol never understood how people like that even lived, because it was so hard to get around with that body. Already Chanyeol finds it difficult to move with his tall figure, and he shudders to imagine how hard it would be if every step he made shook the entire world.

The boy never got close – or maybe he never got a chance to. All Chanyeol knows is that the girls are too quick for him. Or maybe he is too slow. In many ways, Chanyeol feels sorry for him.

“Hey.” Chanyeol whispers to Joonmyun one day at a fansign, curiosity finally killing the cat. He points to the large man once again towards the back of the crowd. “Who is that guy?”

“You don’t see many fanboys around, do you?” Joonmyun replies. “And such a large one too.”

“Yeah. I see him around a lot.”

“He’s not exactly easy to oversee, is he?” Joonmyun smiles gently.

“I know him!” Jongin, from Chanyeol’s other side, pipes up. “He’s Chanyeol’s fan!”

“…Mine?” Chanyeol blinks stupidly.

“Yeah!” Jongin grins hugely. “I talked to him once, after our concert. He was holding so many Chanyeol goods – He had like a thousand Chanyeol fans, and another thousand Chanyeol signs. He had like Chanyeol everything!”

“Uh…”

“I asked him ‘Oh, are you Chanyeol’s fan?’ and he nodded. He really wanted to see you in person, face to face. He attends every concert because of you, and he buys every Chanyeol thing he can see.” Jongin beams.

“Oh …” Chanyeol doesn’t know how to react. He’s flattered?

“He’s a real cute one.” Jongin sighs. “He’s really shy and all. I wish the security guards didn’t laugh about his size.”

“Shh.” Kyungsoo hisses from Joonmyun’s side of the table. “We’re starting.”

Chanyeol puts on his signature grin as the fans begin lining up one by one, waiting for their idols to notice them.

They always make fun of him.

Wherever he goes, he is made fun of. Even though many of Exo’s fans continue to laugh at his size, Baekhyun has never let that affect him. Even though the larger part of him has been urging him to start losing weight already, the tiny part of him told him that he has no time to if he wants to continue seeing Chanyeol.

I’ll only lose weight if Chanyeol hates fat people. Baekhyun thinks to himself, smiling as he holds a file with Chanyeol’s face on it in his plump fingers. I’m sure Chanyeol will like me, no matter what size I am.

Chanyeol finds himself immersing in fan interactions a lot. During concerts, he would sink himself into the music to show the best performance he can muster, and during fansigns, he would make sure he would look into the eyes of all his fans, and by doing so, show them just how much he appreciates every one of them.

Maybe he immerses himself too much, because at the end he never remembers how any of them look.

Until one day.

“H-Hello.” A really soft, soothing voice sounds from above him. The tone of the voice is unique, and something that Chanyeol will remember for his future years. Chanyeol looks up from his previous fan, who had moved onto Sehun, and he almost blinks in surprise at who it is.

It’s the boy.

His fanboy.

“Hi!” Chanyeol lets out a grin, relieved that he stopped himself from looking surprised just in time. The boy is smaller than he thought, being taller than the fangirls but shorter than most men. In many ways, however, he is bigger than he thought. “How are you today?”

“G-Good.” The boy breathes as he holds out their newest album. Chanyeol notices him wearing rings in his plump fingers – all of them with either Chanyeol’s name or Chanyeol’s superpower. They seem to be suffocating his fingers. He accepts the album and hovers his pen over his face in the album.

“What do you want me to write?” He smiles gently. Somehow, this boy has a gentle aura around him, being extremely shy and quiet despite his blaring physical features.

“Uh … I – I just want you to sign it p-please.”

“What’s your name?”

“B-Baekhyun. Byun B-Baekhyun.” He’s trembling, and he looks down at his fingers a lot. Chanyeol can see the girls next to him shift away from him or throw him dirty looks. Part of Chanyeol wishes he can reach out and hold his hand and tell him that it’s okay, there is no need to be nervous, but somehow his hand stays where it is.

“That’s a rare name.” Chanyeol writes Baekhyun’s name and writes a small message underneath before signing off with his signature.

“I-I-I’m your biggest fan!” The boy continues. Chanyeol smiles. “Literally!”

“That’s … nice to hear.” Chanyeol signs off.

“U-Um … D-Do you like ch-ch-ch-chubby girls or boys? O-Or skinny girls and boys?” Baekhyun blurts out. Chanyeol looks up in surprise, not expecting the question at all. A lot of girls turn around to see them, staring strangely at Chanyeol, waiting for his answer.

“…” Chanyeol doesn’t reply for moment, hoping that his answer won’t offend the fanboy before him. He had thought about white lying and even ignoring, but in the end he can’t. He can’t bring himself to lie to someone who wholeheartedly likes him.

“I like skinny girls and boys.” Chanyeol answers after a while. “Healthy ones. I don’t want any of my fans to starve themselves.” He flashes a grin, trying to finish off in a lighthearted note. Most of the girls around them squeal. Still, the crestfallen expression on Baekhyun’s face is something that almost forces a Sorry out of him, but why should he apologise? This is preference, and he believes that anyone overweight has the potential to lose it, and be the best, healthiest versions of themselves. After all, he was a chubby kid back in the day.

“T-Thank you for noticing me.” Baekhyun mumbles, bowing slightly before hurrying off before Chanyeol can even reply, not even bothering to move to meet Sehun, but instead hurrying straight out of the venue and out of sight.

As Chanyeol continues to sign other of his fans’ albums, his ears pick up sniggers from female fans that laugh about Baekhyun’s size. ‘He has the nerve to show up in front of his idol’, ‘I’ve never seen someone so big in my life!’, ‘Chanyeol-oppa really showed him!’. Hearing this makes Chanyeol feel half angry, half guilty, because he never wanted to come off as a jerk, and he knows sometimes it’s not easy for people to lose weight, depending on their genes, but knowing what had happened already, he can’t control it, and he can only hope that Baekhyun won’t be too hurt by the comments around them.

“I personally think that body doesn’t matter, as long as you have a kind heart.” Jongin announces especially loudly in reply to a fan.

His comment shuts them up.

Chanyeol doesn’t see Baekhyun again for three years.

Sometimes Chanyeol wonders if he’s done something wrong.

For the next three years, the audience before him somehow looks empty without the presence of the big boy.

Jongin had cried on the very night on the day of Baekhyun’s first meeting with Chanyeol.

“It’s not fair.” Jongin had wailed to Joonmyun and Kris, who were doing their best to comfort him. “How can they talk about him like that? How can anyone talk about anyone else like that?”

“It’s okay, Jongin.” Kris patted him on the back. “It’s just that Korea has a hard time accepting people of different body sizes. Asia in general. I promise you in the Western countries it’s less judgemental.”

“What’s wrong with being bigger? It doesn’t make you any more worthless.” Jongin hugged his body to himself. “There’s nothing wrong with being different. Imagine if people started discriminating you just because you had black hair and everyone else has blond hair.”

“Okay, okay, Jongin.” Joonmyun cooed, patting the younger’s shoulders.

“I hope that guy didn’t hear any of that. I hope he never hears any of that again! I hope no one a bit chubbier than the standard person will ever feel inferior! Next time I see him, I’m going to make sure he knows I love him, chubby or not!”

But neither Jongin nor Chanyeol will see Baekhyun again for another three years.

Sometimes Chanyeol wonders that if he had reached out and held Baekhyun’s hand and told him that it’s okay, there is nothing to be nervous of, would things be different today?

Would he still see that big boy that has a soft voice and a gentle soul today?

In three years, Exo’s popularity has decreased dramatically due to the rising of newer boy bands and complications within the company because of disputes between members and staff, in which Kris, Luhan and Tao are forced to leave because of this. Even though it may seem to the outer world that they left without notice, and left irresponsibly, the remaining eight Exo members keep in contact with them frequently. Sometimes they even have an OT11 night, in which all members give up whatever commitments they have just to video chat together on a Saturday night. Even though they left the group, sometimes it feels like they’re still together, like nothing happened. They’re still one, and nothing can take that away from them.

Fans weren’t as crazy as they used to be. Reporters weren’t as persistent as they used to be.

Life is calm now, being part of the older generation of Kpop idols. Nowadays most girls would rave about Seventeen and BTS and BLEHMEH, the three hottest male groups at present, so Exo has no space to fit. The fewer fans that attend their every concert, every performance, and every fansign have shown to be the calmer and dedicated fans that retain a balance between personal and Exo lifestyles. During these calm days, Chanyeol would sit back and think about the big boy that had been such a huge fan of his all those years ago, and wonder just what had happened to him. Sometimes he would mentally apologise to him and hope that he’s leading a good life, with a stable job and a kind wife.

Never would he expect him to show up today.

And look so different, too.

Fansigns for Exo fans have quietened down over the years. Chanyeol has more time to talk to his fans, more time to look into their eyes and remember their faces.

“Hello.” Somehow, this voice is foreign yet subtly familiar. The tone is strangely unique. Curious, Chanyeol looks up. He sees a boy before him.

Not just a boy, but a skinny, healthy looking boy with soft pink hair and a small smile on his lips. And wearing eyeliner that makes him look like any classic male idol. A boy that looks smaller than him but is strong and sturdy.

It’s not the toned body that catches Chanyeol’s eye,  nor the heavy eyeliner, but rather, the confident aura that seems to spill out of his body.

Chanyeol can see it. He can see the transformations – he knows that this man was the exactly same one as the big boy from three years ago that people laughed at and made fun of, and that he had no courage to defend. He can’t unsee that. Even the girls around him can see it. The girls are staring at him in awe, wondering how such a beautiful boy fit for an idol is here, at a fansign of an old and almost forgotten boy group. Somehow they seem to stare more at him than at their own favourite idols. Chanyeol opens his mouth. This is him. This is B –

“I’m Baekhyun.” Baekhyun holds out Exo’s newest album. Chanyeol looks down at his fingers. This time, the rings fit perfectly, and Chanyeol can’t help but gawk at how pretty and slender they are.  The rings that have Chanyeol’s name and symbol engraved on them are outshined by the beauty of Baekhyun’s hands. “I’m your biggest fan. Literally.” He grins. His teeth are too sharp, but it somehow boosts the confident aura he has around him.

Chanyeol smiles back.

The boy is dazzling.

“Byun Baekhyun.” He says. “I don’t remember many people, but I remember you.”

I didn’t think I could unsee the you back then,

but I definitely can’t unsee the you now.