Iseul. Kim Iseul. She had been their honeymoon baby. Beautiful Iseul has been their ray of sunshine, entity of hope, and long lasting happiness. She was the one that completed their family, made them content, and whole. They were supposed to watch her grow up, become a mirror of their spitting images. She was supposed to give them heaven and hell, and leave home when she was ready to become an independent woman. Watch her start her own family, guide her along as she became a parent, and hold their grandchild in their arms.

It was supposed to be like that.

Should have been like that.

But he lost her.

Renowned fashion designer Namjoo made the tabloids after publicly pleading for whoever had taken their baby. They offered a generous reward, but no one stepped up. All hell broke loose when his wife of five years filed for divorce, ultimately abandoning him in the end.

Kai’s life remained at a standstill. Good riddance, he had thought when Namjoo walked out the door. No more petty arguments. No more sleeping separately. A half year later down the line, he missed her like hell.

Every day he drowned in work and more work. Would travel around the country and return to his lonely apartment. Sometimes he expected to find Namjoo inside, maybe on the bed, curled up and asleep. Realistically, no one was there to greet him.  

He kept the wedding pictures Namjoo didn’t care for. She’d only left him a few photos of their beloved daughter, took the rest with her.

Once he had been brave enough to discreetly attend one of her fashion events, but a co-worker had pointed him out. In the end, Namjoo dragged him to the back of the stage, blew his ear off and demanded him to leave.

That was…a year ago. He hadn’t seen her since.

Today marked three years since they separated. It was nighttime. The world outside seemed so far away. He felt isolated, like he was drifting off on an island further and further away from the warmth that once belonged to him.   

He was cold. “You’ve lost weight,” he’d heard many times. Maybe that was one of the reasons why he was shivering even in spring. It was barely two in the morning. Always at this time, he yearned for his wife…ex-wife. Namjoo had liked cuddling, he hadn’t. Now he wished he would have done it more with her.

They first met when her boss introduced them at a convention for designers. Namjoo was just launching her career as a fashion designer and he into men’s suits. He liked her immediately and they left the convention early to have dinner together. It all started off from there. Two years later they got married and went to Barcelona for their honeymoon. When they came back she was pregnant with Iseul.

And this…was where they ended up…separated.

*****

“Here’s today’s mail,” his secretary placed a bundle of unopened mail onto his desk, all of them for him. “And I especially picked this up for you.” He watched her set down a magazine onto his desk.

“What’s that?”

“What you requested.” She gave him a smile before walking out of his office, closing the door gently after her. When she was completely gone he picked the magazine up, scanning the front headlines. A fashion magazine. The model on the front page was wearing a white dress dotted in sequins and diamonds designed by Namjoo.

Since she’d been gone the only way he felt closer to her was by reading her interviews in magazines and seeing her clothes in picture. He was proud and happy for her. It felt, in some way, that she was showing him her most grand designs; sharing with him her joy and through interviews talking to him.

Setting the magazine down he picked up one of the white envelopes but eventually averted his attention toward the magazine. Taking it back into the grasp of his fingers, wandered his eyes over the spectacular dress that would go on the market for over a thousand dollars. As he stared at the cover he wondered if she was having her three meals a day and living happily.

After going to the factory to overlook work he called his assistant to check in on the modeling process for this upcoming photoshoot of their new clothing line. With everything under control he left work early, planning to hit the market before heading on home. His refrigerator was as empty as his life and he wasn’t aiming to starve himself.

The store was filled with unkempt noise when he started toward the frozen aisle. Pulling a fridge door open he pulled out a bag of chicken tenders and would have headed for the checkout aisle, but he remained glued in spot. As the fridge door closed he turned toward his right, where far down the aisle a group of kindergarteners were prowling around the ice cream area. Kai’s eyes wandered over them, drowning in the comforting warmth of his heart.

The emotion wasn’t foreign to him, but where it had come from…he didn’t know. Growing wings, the strange heartwarming sensation pounded inside his chest. Fully shifting in order to have the children in his view he looked the group of ten over. Their excited high-pitched voices fought over ice cream flavors and his eyes caught onto the little girl dressed in a denim dress.

“Iseul…” the name breathlessly dropped from his lips, heart pounded like a raging storm. Then louder, “Iseul!” Kai rushed forward, dropping onto a knee as he swung the girl around. His baby…his little girl. Those were Namjoo’s eyes, his lips, and his nose. The spitting image of them.

The little girl stared at him bewildered and shocked. A nearby girl with hair up in two pig tails screamed while the rest of the group stared wide eyed – their little trip interrupted by some strange man. Despite the bewilderment in the air, all he could see was his daughter. This was her. This was her!

As if he’d been slammed by some kind of sledge hammer he gripped onto her arms and ran them down to hold onto her hand, running his eyes over her. Disbelief, shock, joy, and relief all fluttered through him. He didn’t know what to say or do, but he was so grateful she was alive. Would she remember him?

Raising his head up to look her in the eyes, he cupped his hand around her small face. This was his Iseul. He could feel it, his instincts were calling it. There was just something a parent could feel when they looked at their child…a string attached invisibly between them that let him know he wasn’t mistaken.

“Do you remember me?” he stared into her eyes. “It’s me. Daddy.”

“Get your hands off her!” a woman shrieked and Kai was lugged to his feet. “What do you think you’re doing?! How dare you harass a child!”

Kai’s mouth dropped open to explain himself but the woman quickly turned toward Iseul. “Hyena, are you ok?” The girl nodded.

“The Mister called Hyena Iseul, Mrs. Song.” One of the boys spoke up.

The woman glanced shot him a glance before placing a hand atop Iseul’s head to comfort her. “You were scared, weren’t you?”

Hye…na? Kai stared at his Iseul before the woman completely shielded her from sight. “Look here, Mister, you should be more careful next time. There are security cameras all over the store. I’m glad nothing happened, but I won’t take this lightly. If the kids choose to speak up later, I’ll come back here to file charges against you.”

His mind still in a buzz he only stared at her blankly before reaching into his pocket and pulled out his business card. Mrs. Song snatched it from him before leading the kids away from him and toward the front of the store to checkout. Kai whirled around to watch them fade from sight before eventually following, being cautious to keep a distance.

Leaving behind his chicken tenders at the chip rack he followed the children out as they left the store, watched them board a white bus obviously from the countryside, and hurried to his car to follow. He was confused and curious. Out of all the children in the world he was certain Hyena was his Iseul. What had happened? Why had her name changed? Without much thinking he moved on impulse, stepped on the accelerator, and drove after the bus as it started toward the highway.

The bus pulled in toward a rest stop every three hours and they finally reached Jeolla province when the sun began setting. The beautiful mountains and landscape remained invisible the entire way. The bus slowed and came to a stop as they reached their destination. Kai spotted a long building lit up with glowing yellow lights and assumed it was a school.

Pulling around to park on the opposite side of the road, Kai watched the children hop off the bus and into the elementary school. For a few seconds he was annoyed with how the bus blocked his sight. It started down the street a few minutes later and Kai watched as parents who’d been waiting inside for their kids came out with them. Each appeared a happy pair. The child skipping along, clutching onto mommy or daddy’s hand excitedly telling the story of how their trip to Seoul went. Then he spotted his Iseul with a woman he’d never seen before in his life. Slim and tall with hair in a tight bun. Eyes followed them to their car, his heart breaking at the very sight...at every step that Iseul took, bringing them further apart.

What had happened? How had his child gone missing from Seoul all the way to here?

*****

He hadn’t slept, hadn’t chosen to stay overnight but drove back to Seoul. Spotting an open tent when he arrived in the city he stopped for a bowl of soup. He sat there quietly while pondering over what to do as cars zipped by and the night sky became lit up with business lights. Iseul didn’t recognize him, but she hadn’t feared him when he encountered her. He was sure her heart and soul knew he was her father, but she didn’t know it. He wanted her back, but her new mother…would she leave her? What to do?

It was two in the morning, the time he most often thought of Namjoo; the time he most yearned for her to hell and back. This was wrong, but it was right too. He couldn’t go back to Jangheung by himself. And so he rang the doorbell three, four, and six times. He could sense the irritation of the homeowner as she undid the lock loudly from the other side. Kai’s heart melted when he finally saw Namjoo face-to-face for the first time in almost two years. The emotions swirled in his eyes. He was urged to pull her into his arms and weep, for everything had been his fault.

“What the hell are you doing?” the grumpiness in her voice from having been awoken so early was loud and clear. Her hair was tousled, a little longer because it always grew slowly, and there were bags under her eyes. But above all, she still looked the very same person he’d married.

Namjoo shot him a glare before pushing the door close. Reacting quickly he grabbed a hold of the barrier and shoved it back against her strength. “I found her.”

*****

After half an hour of telling Namjoo his story and another ten minute of non-ending persuasion, she was in his car and they were on their way down south. Kai had to admit he never felt so content before, with Namjoo at his side, and on their way to retrieve their daughter.

The neighborhood was a quiet and calm one. The sturdy homes belonged to the middle class with tall gates and bricks built around each home for tight privacy. It was actually a very luxurious neighborhood in broad daylight, but a quiet hideout for a secret rendezvous at night. There were tall trees inside the gates beside each home that lured in a flock of birds and let nature go rampant. A down to earth neighborhood. A good and safe one for children to grow up in.     

Kai pulled up to a white house standing two stories high behind a black gate that reached his waist. As he sat there he worried about the outcome of this. Guilt gnawed at the smaller part of him. It told him Iseul probably led a good life, was very well cared for, and was – even if he didn’t want to admit it – more comfortable with the woman she’d grown up with than her real parents. The bigger part of him wanted his daughter home. He wanted to tell her he was sorry for not watching her better that day, letting her get lost, and being unable to bring her home. He wanted to be a part of her life, witness her grow up into a beautiful young woman, fight and cry with her, and walk her down the aisle and give her hand away.

There was so much, so much he wanted to do with and for her.

He turned when Namjoo pulled the door open and quickly unbuckled himself before following. The garage door had opened and Namjoo was striding toward it. Kai made sure to be right behind her. As they neared he heard a little girl’s voice inquiring about ice cream after school. Namjoo had stopped at the door of the opened garage, staring right in at their little one.

“Iseul!” she screamed, froze for two seconds, and then ran in. Surprise shifted through Kai before quickly hurrying forward. Upon two steps into the clean garage with light seeping in behind him, he saw Namjoo kneeling on the ground holding onto Iseul’s arms the exact same way he had yesterday.

“Mom, it’s mommy,” he heard Namjoo crying, pleading with the girl to recognize her. “It’s me. Don’t you remember me?”

Iseul – with Namjoo’s inherited eyes – stared back confused, scared, and bewildered by the woman crying in front of her. “Mommy,” she squeaked, glancing back for her mother’s help. Then pulling out of Namjoo’s hands rushed over to the woman they neither knew of for protection. The betrayal that wasn’t meant to be betrayal punched them hard in the guts. Kai didn’t know what to do.

“Who are you?” the woman inquired, her voice shaky. Her peaceful morning interrupted by the appearance of two strangers she didn’t know of. Kai glanced around the garage and took note that there wasn’t another car in the garage. Was there a husband or none at all?

“Can we,” he started, “talk?”

*****

“I want my baby back,” Namjoo stated determinedly, her voice both hot and cool but with obvious rage.

They watched Iseul’s proclaimed mother walk with her to the doors of the kindergarten hand in hand, lean down to receive a kiss from her, and waved happily as she went inside. Kai could feel in both his and Namjoo’s hearts the jealousy and envy flaring. Iseul should be with them, not some woman who hadn’t birthed her.

After following the woman back to her home he found himself standing in between the kitchen and the living room. Namjoo remained seated at the kitchen table quietly awaiting a cup of coffee. The walls were a creamy white, the living room arranged in a cozy manner and free of objects that could harm a child. There was a fireplace with yellow-orange bricks built up to the ceiling. The windows were large, giving way for abundant life. The house was lively, homey, and friendly.

Everything in the kitchen was organized in cupboards, drawers, and along the marble countertop. Kai spotted Mickey Mouse cups, chopsticks for children, and decorated plates all for Iseul. Her clumsy drawings – of her and her mother – were treasured against the refrigerator along with pictures taken at the park and at birthday parties. There was no father. Still, seeing the drawings and the pictures that could have been in his household – their home – shot his heart with darts. He knew Namjoo was probably staring at the treasured pieces as well.

He finally sat down with Namjoo when the woman placed a manila folder onto the table in front of them. They were legitimate adoption papers from the Jeolla Orphanage.

“I couldn’t have my own, my husband and I adopted her from the orphanage. He passed earlier this year.” The woman explained as his eyes scrolled over the document with heart pounding in his ears. He couldn’t believe this. It wasn’t possible…

“This…” Namjoo shook her head in utter disbelief, her heart denying the very reality of what was before their eyes. “No…” she fought from letting her face contort with pain, “we never…” then she turned to him pleadingly, her puppy eyes begging for him to defend them. Kai was urged to squeeze her within his very arms, but he couldn’t. “Say something!”

He was distraught. Was this right or wrong? Either way, none of them could get out of this without hurting. To win or to lose?

“Lets find a lawyer first,” Kai proposed with as much calm as he could gather. “We need to find out what happened.”

“A lawyer?” Namjoo repeated angrily. “I want our daughter back! She doesn’t belong here! Iseul, our daughter!”

His eyes shot toward the woman then to Namjoo, wary that she was watching and listening. To hear two complete strangers talk about her daughter like this. To claim that her adopted daughter was their very own. To say the system had messed up and they were going to rip her family of two apart. How did it feel?

Kai knew that feeling well. His family was already broken. Did he want to push the same fate on someone else? That someone that had raised his daughter, spent the missing years he was supposed to with her?

“I know,” he looked back at Namjoo, “I want her home too, but lets follow the legal process first.”

Namjoo didn’t speak to him on the way to looking for a hotel. He could imagine how her heart was boiling with rage and knew it was best to let her have some space. After getting a suite with two separate bedrooms, a living space, and a kitchen he watched Namjoo walk away from him without word. Minutes later the shower was running.

There was no food, no clothes to change into. Namjoo would refuse to leave Jangheung without Iseul. They were stuck here for as long as the court process would take. In the meantime he would go find food, buy some extra clothes for them, and get in contact with a lawyer. If not for him Iseul would still be theirs, would still acknowledge them as her parents.

It didn’t take long to locate a store where he found both food and some clothes for them. As he went through the racks for nightwear for Namjoo, he thought about the very first time when he walked into the women section of the store in search of clothing for her. A bashful young man in love was what he’d been then. Things had turned out so differently on such short notice. Nothing was fair.

Along the drive back he got in touch with a lawyer from Seoul who was willing to come down to handle their case and investigate. Almost an hour had passed since he stepped out. Hurrying into the building he headed up the elevator toward their suite. Namjoo turned at the sound of the opening door when he came through with hair still damp, droplets dripping off her hair sliding across her skin into her shirt. For a few seconds he stared, wishing he could kiss the droplets off her glorious skin.

Setting the bags onto the table he handed her the plastic bag with extra clothes for her. “I got some food and some clothes for you.” His face turned upon a sharp, stinging slap and he listened to Namjoo’s shaky breath.

“Jerk,” she muttered. “Just get me back my daughter.”

Hurt, guilt, and disappointment flooded through him but fought against the feelings. He knew Namjoo’s rage well and he was used to it. Ever since he lost Iseul he’d been her punching bag, believed he deserved it. Namjoo was still angry and determined never to forgive him. He was fine with that too, because he knew she was still shedding tears and all because of his foolishness.

After setting the table and organizing the rest of the food into the fridge he ate alone before deciding to turn in for the rest of the night. Kai opted for a warm shower, standing in what felt like rain for minutes on end. Cheek still stung but the pain wasn’t as big as the scar in Namjoo’s heart. Closing his eyes he sighed.

The mirror had fogged up and swiping it away he realized why his cheek had stung so much. Two tiny slash marks from Namjoo’s long nails marred his cheek. It was the cost of losing their daughter and finding her again, an almost trophy.

Dressing into the clothes he bought he stepped out of the bathroom and sat down on the fluffy bed, searching through his phone for any missed calls from the lawyer or work. There was none. The door suddenly opened forcing him to look up to find none other than Namjoo with a little white paper bag in hand.

“Is something wrong?” he worried. Namjoo didn’t speak to him, but walked in and sat on the bed being careful to leave a small gap between them. Setting the paper bag on her lap she pulled out a little bottle. Kai watched her raise her hand, gently touch his face to turn it to an angle and spread the ointment over the cuts on his face. His heart immediately softened. He wanted to kiss her, hug her, and tell her it was ok but he didn’t. Instead he watched her concentrate on him with butterflies dancing in the pit of his stomach. Right now he was her center of attention and that was all that mattered.

When she finished she stood, ready to leave. “Thanks,” he stopped her, “Namjoo.” As the door softly closed the grin on his face grew larger. She cared and she was sorry, he could feel it from the very bottom of his heart. That night he slept happily.

*****

Three days had passed. Investigation was still ongoing intensely. Kai repeatedly told his story. Carnival, big crowds, busy stalls. They’d just come from the Ferris Wheel and Iseul wanted cotton candy. When he turned around after purchasing the sweet snack she was gone. He had searched everywhere, gone to the monitoring department and missing kids area. She couldn’t be found.

He and Namjoo had reported to the police, waited patiently, still nothing. They argued, fought, and finally divorced. And here they were, in Jangheung, Jeolla with questions to be answered.

“What we know is a woman dropped Iseul off at the orphanage during a time when it was running inconsistent of kids,” their lawyer, Lee Chul, explained. He was a fair man beyond his forties, intelligent and quick witted with a thin frame and long face decorated with stubbles. They were meeting in their suite for the best of privacy.  

“Inconsistent?” Kai repeated.

“Yes,” he nodded, “due to a low number of children and bad reviews, the orphanage was being threatened to shut down. That was the time when Iseul was dropped off there, as well as a good number of children.”

“Wait,” Namjoo interrupted, “you mean the orphanage would have been closed down if there weren’t a specific number of kids there?”

“Yes,” he stated, “this is a village orphanage, fundraised by families in the area. The money feeds, educate, and supplies the children with necessities. If there aren’t enough the families believe the extra money is exploited for other reasons than the welfare of the children. If they pull back the money the orphanage doesn’t stand a chance against surviving in the long run.”

“Is it still open even today?” Kai wondered.

“It’s planned to close down by the end of the year as a newer one in the city is opening up.”

“What about our Iseul?” Namjoo worried.

“If the President of the orphanage admits to illegally accepting Iseul, we’ll have a case and you can press charges. As for the fact that she’s been legally adopted, it’s up to the parents to solve the matter. Although the law would give the biological parents the full rights to raising her.”

“So you mean…we can now go get her?” there was hope growing in Namjoo’s voice.

“After charges come through, yes.”

A gasp escaped from his ex-wife, and she covered in happy disbelief. “My baby…she can finally come home.”

That evening Namjoo excitedly prepared dinner for them for the first time since coming down south. She was all giddy, humming and singing to herself. Kai was glad for her. The sight was miraculous. He was outright overjoyed by the news, but part of him drowned in gloom. Iseul wasn’t a baby anymore. She was a five-year-old child who knew what went on around her. She would know him and Namjoo as Uncle and Aunt, not mom and dad. How could she accept two strangers into her life? How would her single mother fare? Why was his heart both happy and distraught?

If it happened that they got Iseul back he would get Namjoo back as well. Without Iseul there was no Namjoo and he would return to a life of lying in bed at two in the morning wishing he had her.    

“And this and this,” Namjoo gleefully placed side dishes onto his plate. “I learned how to make them from the food network channel. They might not taste good, but give them a try.”

She was speaking to him out of free will, smiling, and eyes sparkling as she awaited his reaction. Kai could have cried. Namjoo hadn’t treated him like this since what felt like forever, but she was only happy because of Iseul. He had wounded her so badly that she didn’t want him around. He would never forget that. He feared going through it again, but the truth was more honorable than hiding under a mask. And he would patiently wait until the day Namjoo could truly forgive him. Until she did would he get his heart back.

*****

Another week passed and they finally received news that the President of Jeolla Orphanage was being fined ten grand for misdemeanor; for paying mediums to bring him children in order to keep the orphanage running; and for siphoning the villager’s money. Kai and Namjoo would be compensated with the right to have their daughter returned.

Right after receiving the news, they started out for that very familiar house. Iseul’s proclaimed mother had heard the news and was prepared for their arrival. As they neared the home Kai imagined the onslaught of emotions each party would go through after this.

The doorbell echoed and the door clicked open. The woman didn’t smile at them from the other side, but kindly let them in. Iseul was in the living room watching TV with a bowl of cut up apples in front of her. She turned when the two strangers walked in.

“Hyena, honey,” the woman called, tone soft, voice gentle and coaxing but Kai detected heartbreak as well. “You remember what we talked about, don’t you?”

Their spitting image ran her eyes over them and obediently stood to her feet. “Mommy…”

The woman shook her head, “Your mommy is over there.”

Iseul glanced at them slowly before turning her gaze back to her mother. “I don’t want to.”

“Iseul…” Namjoo began.

“My mommy is here,” she grabbed the other woman’s hand. Her face broke and tears lubricated her big, round eyes. “Why are you giving me away? Mommy, why don’t you want me anymore? Please, I’ll be a good girl! I won’t be bad anymore! Mommy, please let me stay here.”  

As her wails broke throughout the home Kai stood frozen, his heart pounding wildly in both pain and guilt. Dreams of watching his daughter grow up before his eyes vanished along with hopes of rebuilding his family. Taking his daughter from her now mother was wrong in all ways. Iseul no longer knew them as her own. It broke him in all ways possible, but he wouldn’t take her now happiness from her. A father’s duty wasn’t to destroy his daughter’s present, but to protect it.

He waited for Namjoo to make movement, to protest, grab Iseul and tell her to come home with them. But she neither moved. Time seemed to have come to a standstill before she slowly stepped forward and knelt down onto a knee.

“All right,” she placed a hand comfortingly on Iseul’s tiny hand, her soft hair, touching her daughter for the first time in three long years. “Auntie just wanted to come see you before she goes home.”

Sniffing, Iseul turned around to look at Namjoo who fought to hold back wounded tears. Her lips trembled as she tried to smile. “Auntie heard that there was a pretty little girl around here, so she wanted to come see you.” Namjoo combed her fingers through her sleek hair again. “Look at you, you’ve grown up so well…Hyena.”

Tears barely slipped passed his eyes as Namjoo’s heart shattered to the floor in pieces incapable of being put back together.

“You be a good girl and always listen to your mother,” Namjoo cupped a hand around her face then rose to her feet, unsteadily took a step forward, paused and turned back to look at her daughter one last time before hurrying out.

Namjoo disappeared out the door before he could follow. He was feared she would run off, leave him behind, and do something foolish. Kai was prepared to scream for her around the bend, but stopped when he spotted her crumpled on the ground crying her heart out. Dropping onto his knees before her he hesitated to touch her.

“Namjoo…” his voice cracked and almost fell back when Namjoo lunged forward, wrapping both arms around his neck.

“What do we do now, Kai?” she sobbed against his shoulder. “What am I supposed to do now?”

Tears of his heartbreak finally slipped through and he held her closer, “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Namjoo.”

*****

It was nighttime. Namjoo had refused to eat or do anything. He could still hear her sobbing from her room. He was at a loss of what to do for her, for himself. He wanted her to eat or she would starve herself.

Kai found it difficult to bring himself a step further into her room and only stopped at the open doorway. She was lying on her side, back facing him. They’d come in hopes of bringing Iseul back. Their dreams had been dashed. Everything they lived for felt like a huge lie.

When they fell in love he imagined a life full of guarantees and butterflies. A few fights here and there were logical and normal, but they’d always be happy. It was even better when Iseul came along. A regular family of three; would live life to its advantage. There would be trips around the world, he would take Namjoo and their daughter to all places possible. They would make unforgettable memories and live till old age, enjoy life to the fullest.

Lies, lies, lies. No such happiness existed forever. They had been blinded by love. They had expected too much because of it. Standards had gotten too high. They’d messed up.

With courage he walked into the room, “Namjoo, go eat.” She didn’t reply or move. “Please, go eat something.” A long moment of silence ensued. She wanted to be left alone. “Alright then, I made some food for you on the table. If you need anything I’ll be in my room.”

He turned around to leave and immediately halted when she croaked, “Don’t go.” Kai looked back at her to find her unmoved. Slowly he trudged over and sat down on the edge of the bed, his heart hurting ten times more when he saw how much pain she was in. He was tired, really tired. Tired and hungry.

Lying down he stared up at the ceiling, wondering when their days would ever get better. If, at all, their lives would ever be fixed. And somehow he drifted off into a slumber awakening when he felt Namjoo wrapping her arm around his waist from behind. Still weeping, relieving her soul of sorrow long due. Pressing her forehead against the back of his neck, he felt warm tears drench his shirt.

If she hurt, he hurt just as much. They had both lost the center of their lives. The pain carried out in her tears multiplied in volumes. Pain grew around them like a shadow and Kai blinked back tears before turning around to hug her, wishing he could make things better if he weren’t so incapable. Perhaps, it might have been better if he hadn’t gone to her and told her about Iseul.

When he came to hours later Namjoo was gone from his side. Getting up he found her in the kitchen, dressed in the same clothes she’d come here with. There was food set out on the table, all freshly cooked.

“Come eat,” Namjoo said. He walked in, glanced at the food again and wondered what the occasion was. She’d only cooked for him once so far and that was when she’d been elated about getting Iseul back.

Without waiting for him to sit and eat, she started, “I’m going back to Seoul. My plane leaves in four hours.”

Leaving?

“Namjoo…” he tried, but she cut him off.

“It makes…my heart weak when you say my name,” she shook her head. “I’m grateful you gave me the chance to meet my daughter. Once is better than never in this lifetime.” Her eyes were wet when she looked at him, but she refused to cry. “Eat something before you drive back home.”

So was that what this is? The last meal she would cook for him? Her goodbye?

“I’m going.” She said and started to walk by. His heart pounded harder. So much pain…

“Don’t go,” he finally spoke, eyes on the ground. Then turned to look at her. “I missed you…a lot,” he paused and waited for her to look at him, “Namjoo.”

The corner of her lips protruded upwards, her face contorting in pain. “It’s hard for me.” Namjoo averted her eyes and seemed to hesitate. “I hate you and I miss you. I care about you and I’m still angry with you. Sometimes I even wonder if I had been right by falling in love with you.”

“I love you.” He declared and watched her turn to him, uncertainty splattered over her expression. “Isn’t that enough to know?”

A tear slipped down her face. Three lonely years was enough suffering for him. Since they had come down to this, he didn’t want to lose her. She was still his family, and his heart. He couldn’t be whole without her.

“Lets go home,” he said. “Together.”

***Wow, this took really long to complete! I really needed the emotion for this! I've been like a robot these days. Sorry for the long wait! I hope you enjoyed it! 

***As we have it, they were victims of a corruption and it cost them their daughter. Separately they suffered the same pain, but you see near the end Namjoo slightly opens up to share her pain with Kai and he comforts her. If Namjoo continues to carry the burden by herself on her own shoulders, it's not going to be a happy journey for her. They need to get through this incident together. So I left off with an open ending. And I think this calls for a sequel xD