Always By Your Side

Losing Myself

Baekhyun fidgeted in his bed, Sehun standing beside him, looking at him with exasperated but impossibly soft eyes. When the smaller male twisted himself again, Sehun took hold of Baekhyun’s arm and gently made him halt his movements. The older looked at him with questioning eyes.

“Stop pacing around. I know that you really want to see Junmyeon and assure yourself that he’s fine but you know that it may take a while for the news to spread. Don’t make yourself worse, you’re supposed to leave tomorrow.”

“What if he doesn’t come? I’m seriously worried that we pushed him so far that he simply doesn’t care anymore. What if our plan doesn’t work?”

“It will work, just have faith on him; as you said, Junmyeon cares too much to simply give us the cold shoulder. He’ll come!”

“You sound so sure!” retorted Baekhyun wrinkling his nose.

“Of course, it is your plan and you know Junmyeon too well.” replied Sehun kissing the other’s temple.

“You have too much faith in me!” muttered Baekhyun, looking down a little embarrassed.

“Of course I do, you are the best Baekhyunnie!” smiled Sehun giving a speechless Baekhyun a tight hug.

“You two gross me out!” came out a voice at the doorway.

The couple turned to the voice and Sehun lazily threw a pillow at Jongdae’s direction, earning a yelp from Baekhyun, as he saw his pillow being used as a projectile.

“My pillow…” he mumbled sadly making Sehun hurry to retrieve the fluffy pillow, which Baekhyun had thanked him happily with a kiss on the jaw. He didn’t even looked directly at Jongdae because he was certain the other was making the kissy noises he was hearing, therefore he should be ignored.

“News are well spread and it is just a matter of time before he comes to the hospital.”

Jongdae paused a little when he looked at Baekhyun. The other had taken his bandage from his wound, since he was expecting the visit of a dermatologist since his wound was creating a hard scab and the doctors were worried about the increasing probability of a really big scar.

“Jongdae?”

At the call of his name, Jongdae looked at Baekhyun and he found himself a little bit guilty for staring so intently.

“I’m sorry!”

“Don’t be! It’s normal to stare I guess. It is pretty big.” interjected Baekhyun gracefully. “I would stare too, don’t feel bad about it!”

“It adds character!” added Sehun seriously making Baekhyun and Jongdae look at the taller.

“Is that the best you have to say?”

“What? I thought I should say something too! ”

“Don’t…” begged Jongdae looking at the other blankly. “You don’t have a funny bone in your body. Leave the jokes to me!”

“How is Luhan?” asked Baekhyun quickly seeing the maknae pouting at Jongdae’s words.

“Still home! Minseok said he drank himself crazy, snuck all soju from manager hyung. When Minseok and Kyungsoo found him later on they said that Lu must have been really out of it because he kept on crying and laughing. Kyungsoo told me also said that Luhannie babbled about Junmyeon: on how he liked him, to the color is his eyes, to his honey like voice, to Minseok and then threw up on him and passed out. Kyungsoo said it was a really lovely night.”

Baekhyun and Sehun winced; bless Minseok and his ever present patience when handling these types of situations, or any kind of situation regarding an overly dramatic Luhan.

“Kyungsoo also said that Minseok and Kris are acting strange; he believes something happened to them.”

“Did Kris confess to Min hyung?” muttered Baekhyun absent mindedly, making the other males look at him confused. “Don’t tell me you didn’t notice how flushed Minseok and Kris are around each other?!”

“I didn’t actually.”

“Yeah, never noticed!”

“es…”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Minseok was just having the time of his life: being the recipient of projectile vomit was top notch stuff, add that to the fact that Luhan had spent the entire night talking about Junmyeon, making long, yet kind of beautiful odes to their leader, regardless they had made him cringe once or twice, especially when Luhan had started to talk about Junmyeon ‘cute and perky little bottom’. He was traumatized for life and thanked heavens that Kyungsoo, with all his Satany powers, had come to help him; the younger and wrestled Luhan’s body onto a bed, shutting the other up, rather effectively by sending him a glare and demanding, in a saccharine kind of voice, to shut up, he didn’t need to add up an ‘or else’, it was very implied.

After he cleaned himself up, trading his ruined shirt and jeans for a clean t-shirt and shorts, the older had marched to the kitchen, bypassing Chanyeol and Jongin who had just arrived from the hospital, both tired and looking quite ragged.

He sat on the counter, quietly eating, when a voice interrupted his thoughts.

“Hi…”

“Wrong direction, move along.”

“Minseok…”

“Not in the mood for any kind of conversation, scram!”

Kris was taken aback by Minseok’s attitude, the older man seemed to be in a really poor mood, but then again, his day hadn’t been a walk in the park and he had contributed largely to that fact, so he guessed it was well deserved.

When Kris continued to stare at him for a while, Minseok dropped the fork he was using and turned to the taller male.

“Look, I am honestly tired today, generally the Junmyeon thing is seriously worrying me, then you with all your insecurities and honest to God crappy arguments and Luhan with his insecurities, epiphanies and poor drinking skills killed me today, I don’t really need you to screw my head further. I really don’t. I just want to crawl towards my bed and sleep.”

“I understand that but we need to talk.”

“Not today, Kris.” interjected Minseok, leading the fork to his mouth one last time before getting up and tidy after himself; he was known for being organized and clean after all.

“I really think we should…”

But Kris was unrelenting and Minseok was done; he his heel to face Kris.

“Goddammit Kris, learn to respect my wishes! Right now I am not in the mood to talk to you, I will say things I regret, you’ll say things that you’ll regret because I will probably push your buttons too far and let’s face it, you are very easy to inflame. So let’s leave this conversation to a time where I am willing to listen.”

He prepared himself to leave the room, a little embarrassed at his outburst but Kris pulled him gently into his arms, much to his dismay.

“You are absolutely right, I am a stubborn person and I absolutely refuse to let you go. Like you asked I thought very carefully about you and I and I came to the conclusion that you are right. You are so right! I spent all of this time thinking that he career I created was the most important this. That me being with you was going to affect your career, the thing that you’re worked so hard for. But I realized that nothing of that matter if you don’t have a special someone to share all your joys and sorrows, if you don’t have someone that can make you forget all of your hardships with a look; someone that is your safe haven and can shelter you in his arms and protect you from the entire world; whose smile is the most beautiful thing that you can ever see…I found that someone, I actually never realized I needed one until you came. You, with your effortless smiles and caring eyes, with all your strength and gentle nature; you are the one that I can have a home with and I refuse to let this opportunity slip past me. I am not making that mistake, not now nor ever.”

Minseok was speechless, in all his life he would never expect to hear those kind of words coming from Kris; as sweet as the other man was, a true softy at heart, he was also a reserved man, a man that didn’t utter a lot of words because he knew the importance of them; he could relate, he was the same.

Kris, on the other hand was having a hard time hiding his panic, Minseok had yet to say a word, and the possibility of a rejection was scaring him; had he waited too long to speak to the older man?

“Let’s just go to bed.”

“What?” asked Kris, not quite processing the other’s words.

Minseok let his body sag against Kris and the other quickly wrapped an arm around the smaller’s shoulder, to prevent him from falling.

“Let’s go to bed.” repeated the older before pushing himself from Kris’ embrace and starting to walk towards his room.

Kris heart fell to the floor; Minseok hadn’t even acknowledged his words. He faked a smile and went after the man but when he turned to the guest room, where he and Luhan had been staying, a hand pulled him back. He turned to look at Minseok.

“I don’t think you understood me. Come to bed.” repeated the other, implying something with his tone of voice that Kris wasn’t getting; he could be dumb whenever he wanted so don’t sue him!

“Which bed?” asked Kris hesitantly, feeling as if he was trying to figure out the easier riddle in the history of ever.

“Ours!” answered Minseok with a beautiful smile, holding out his hand for him.

Kris’ heart lurched painfully at the ethereal looking being in front of him. He quickly held the smaller hand in his.

“Let’s go then.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Junmyeon raced towards Baekhyun’s hospital room, hoping that it hasn’t changed, so he wouldn’t lose time searching for it. He was quite relieved to open the door and find Baekhyun inside, resting on the bed. He approached the other silently, admiring the peaceful expression on his face and he gently traced Baekhyun’s forehead with a finger, moving his bangs out of the way. He couldn’t believe that his little dongsaeng had succumbed against his condition. He hoped that, once awake, Baekhyun would be able to conquer everything, as he always did, but it hadn’t happened and his shriveled heart sank deeper into his chest.

“I was starting to wonder when you’d come.”

Junmyeon looked startled and he looked down, straight into the sweet brown eyes staring at him.

“Baekhyun?! I thought…” he babbled looking quite shocked.

“I know you did but, in the end, it was all just a rumor that we started in hopes of getting you to come back to us.” explained Baekhyun, a little worried as Junmyeon looked more and more betrayed. “We are very sorry, we really didn’t mean to deceive you but we knew you wouldn’t come any other way.”

Junmyeon, feeling suddenly caged, as if air wasn’t enough and that he needed to leave the room, it was simply too suffocating. He his heels and prepared to bolt out of the door, ignoring Baekhyun’s frantic calls, but he was stopped by Sehun who stood at the door, arms crossed. He stumbled backwards and lost his ability to breathe and Sehun caught him before the fell to the ground, a step away from hyperventilating. He struggled to hear everything around him and only Sehun’s arms around him were keeping him grounded enough. Junmyeon heard the maknae say something, however he didn’t realized what it might have been until he felt soft, long hands: Baekhyun’s.

“Breathe, Junmyeon.” when he failed to do so, Baekhyun commanded him to breathe again. “Breathe! Breathe! I am not mad at you, everything’s fine.”

His breathing calmed down as the slender hands kept his face and the strong arms hugging him. When he came to his senses, he was sitting on the floor, between Sehun’s outstretched legs while Baekhyun was kneeling in front of him.

“Baekhyun, go back to bed.” pleaded Sehun.

Junmyeon’s focused on Baekhyun’s face, the man was grimacing slightly; pained at the strain he had put on his neck.

“Go back to bed Baekhyun.” he rasped.

In the end, Baekhyun had to be helped back to bed, since he was still too unstable on his two feet, mainly due to his comatose state, but mostly to post shock after witnessing Junmyeon break down; he had remained calm until the situation was under control but after then, he seemed to lose his strength.

Sehun busied himself fussing around Baekhyun while Junmyeon sat at the end of the bed, watching the Baekhyun looking so fondly at the maknae.

“Stop fussing, Sehun.” begged the bed ridden man before turning to Junmyeon, ignoring his boyfriend pout. “Where have you been hyung? Why did you leave us?”

The tone that Baekhyun used showed how hurt Baekhyun must have been and Junmyeon simply started crying. He felt Baekhyun’s arms wrapping around him and he succumbed to the tears, whispering ‘sorry’ over and over again. Each and every time Baekhyun would reply with an ‘I forgive you; it’s okay’.

It took a while for him to stop crying but Baekhyun never once released him, he kept his loving embrace trying to convey how much he liked him. It was the knowledge that he had Baekhyun’s conventional support that made him start talking.

“I feel like I am a failure; I failed everyone, I failed to keep Kris, I failed to keep Luhan. I couldn’t keep EXO from crumbling and everything is just deteriorating and just turning to the worst. And then instead of helping you, because you were suffering too, we all were, I just turned destructive and even hurt you. I can’t believe I did this and then Luhan is here and I couldn’t face him, not after everything, not after hurting you, not after losing him. I feel like no matter what I am never enough for even, heck I am sure he doesn’t even think about me like that.”

Baekhyun pondered the words the other uttered but it was Sehun who took the initiative to talk.

“Look Junmyeon, I am not okay with everything that happened, you know that because I was not too shy about letting you know and I think that I owe you an apology, it was wrong of me to say some of the things that I said, I was really angry because Baekhyun was hurt and I didn’t think clearly. However, I do think that it was selfish of you to not think of us and frankly it makes me feel that you don’t trust us, your friends; we would have been here for you. I am a little bit disappointed about the way you’ve dealt with things but know that Baekhyun’s fine I can see things more clearly and I have come to realize that you have the world on your shoulders and sometimes it must be hard dealing with everything but you do have to realize that you are not on your own, we’re here and we’re here to stay, even when EXO dismembers, even when you are grey and old. We are family, we are one.”

“While I don’t agree with everything Sehun said and we already had this conversation,” continued Baekhyun “there is one thing we agree upon which is the fact that you can always count on us, we got your back regardless of everything. Always! And about Luhan, I really think that you should talk with him and fix everything; he is as distraught about this whole situation as you are.”

“He knows?” whispered Junmyeon suddenly afraid.

“He does. Minseok didn’t tell me all the details, he only said that it had involves a variety of different of emotions and culminated in Luhan drinking his body weight and throwing up on him.” commented Sehun earning a surprised look from Junmyeon, accompanied with a sniffle, and a disgusted look from Baekhyun.

“That’s nasty!” interjected Baekhyun.

“Well, Minseok is having a poor night.”

“So, here is what we do, tonight, you’ll just stay here, I know for a fact that everyone is home, or heading that way. Tomorrow we’ll talk or whenever you are prepared.” suggested Baekhyun, receiving a little nod from Junmyeon, who really looked like a small child, feet dangling from the side of the bed, fists balled up by his side, looking at them expectantly.

“Come here Myeon.” called Baekhyun patting the bed beside him.

It was actually painful to see how Junmyeon, in all his childlike enthusiasm, scurried to the place next to Baekhyun, looking at the other in expectation. Junmyeon cared about other all of the time and provided everyone what they needed and to see him like this, like a love starved person, make both younger males feel bad about it.

Baekhyun let his arms snake around Junmyeon’s waist, feeling the other snuggle up to him, head on his chest. He let a hand rub soothing circles in Junmyeon’s back and, not even five minutes left, the other was out cold, deep asleep.

“Poor Junmyeon, he must have been so tired!”

Sehun nodded while scooting a chair next to Baekhyun’s bed, his boyfriend looked at him with a small but radiant smile that made Sehun kiss him sweetly. Since Baekhyun was holding Junmyeon, Sehun laid an arm over the tinier male, the tips of his finger brushing against the leader’s neck.

“Love you.” muttered Baekhyun against his lips.

“Love you too.”

“Tomorrow we’ll settle everything and Junmyeon’s going to get better.” stated Baekhyun firmly, voice determined as it had ever been.

“Of course it will, because Baekhyunnie has the power to fix everything.”

“And Sehunnie is the best…” whispered Baekhyun before closing his eyes, halfway to dream land.

Sehun watched fondly as Baekhyun slept peacefully with Junmyeon on his arms, both of them so tangled up on each other, looking cute little puppies. It was heartbreaking how much in need of love their leader was. He couldn’t imagine what that was, especially since Baekhyun had a more permanent place in his life. He just hoped Junmyeon and Luhan could talk and fix everything and just be happy like he was but Junmyeon was so frail right now. So Sehun prayed, he prayed that everything turned out to be alright.

 




A/N: Chapter alert, hooray for me! Start to prepare yourselves to the ending of this story, a chapter or two and this story is ending. Probably one more chapter and a smaller one to wrap it up! Sad? Tell me everything! I erally hope you enjoy this chapter! 
A big, big hug to you all. I love you to bits ^^

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Comments

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AnaHsnh
#1
Chapter 12: This story is very good,, glad that junmyeon happy in the end.
MoroccanBlackDragon
#2
Chapter 12: This story got me crying hard.
tsha_l #3
Chapter 8: "... you dammed midget!" XD and seriously Jongin being a drama mama XD
Exo3007
#4
Chapter 12: Im slightly confused. Is Kyungsoo together with Jongdae or.....?
tsha_l #5
Chapter 2: The dialogue in this chapter was cool! I love drunk Suho's slurry-speak. Kai taking charge was so manly too. Hurrying over to the 'next' button now!
Trashboy #6
Chapter 4: I love this story but why do I read so many fics about Suho being in the wrong :^( when will he do something right?!
ItsWompy
#7
Chapter 12: rEADING THIS SO MANY TIMES LOVE THIS STORY
Chichay88
#8
Chapter 12: AYEEEEE YOU REALLY ROCK AUTHORNIM I LOVE THIS (lol i finished this at 1 in the morning but only commenting at 6 in the evening bc i fell asleep) ANYWAYS I LOVE THIS I LOVE ALL OF YOUR STORIES YOU SHOULD WRITE MORE WHEN YOURE NOT BUSY OKEH? I JUST LOVE HOW THIS SHOWS EXO'S LOVE FOR EACH OTHER I CANT HELP BUT THINK THAT MAYBE MAYBE THIS REALLY HAPPENED AND THE ONE WHO WROTE THIS IS KYUNGSOO BC HE LOVES MAKING BAEK SUFFER TOO LOOOOL LOVELOTS <3
Solbynessdelight #9
Chapter 12: I just read this story aaaaaaandd!! WHY CAT?!? huhuhu~ TT-TT WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS DOING THIS TO MEH?! Artmgwpumgwptgnwh The first few chapters made me cry but then after the part where SeBaek was seen kissing at the hospital, it made me laugh and smile. For short, it made me look like I'm crazy. And as always, this is just A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!! Homaygad! I really love you know?! <3 Agtptjgtpmwktwjqtm You deserve an applause! /claps hands til it goes numb/
ItsWompy
#10
Chapter 7: From the heart it always comes from for you, Minseok

mmmmmmmmmmmmm xiurissss