A/N: I'm re - writing the first chapter and the chapters I have under drafts under here. Because now. I choose to have it be in Chanyeol's POV. So it changes the story alittle. >< Sorry.. - RemeRis96 

So it's me Chanyeol, And it shocks me that my baby sister has grown up so big in the past years. I haven't heard from her in so long, Since I started being in EXO. Being an Idol was hard, All this different stuff we need to do.. She was now 18, when I was training, I was sixteen and so she was  11 years old. Time passed by so fast. 

When Was the last time I saw him? That we had even celebrated our birthday togther? None of the other members know about his existance. Not even Baekhyun and he was my bestfriend. No one knew about him, I never talked about him.. My family thinks he is died, But I still have a little hope that he will suddenly show up out of nowhere, And give me the same smile he has always had everytime I found him when we played hide and seek when we where younger. But I haven't seen that particular person in so long. 

The last time I saw him we where six years old, And I can still remember when he was dragged away by a guy that was the height that we are now 185 CM. Back than, I couldn't fight back when they took him away. I tried running after the car, but I never reached the car. I could hear his cries.. "Yeolie! Yeolie!" 

I remember calling his name, with tears rolled down my eyes. I had chased after the car for a full mile. But none of my actions got him back.. He was still taken.. Till this day, I believe I should of tried fighting back.. But the adult guy there was taller than me, and I was just a six year old kid. I tried punching the guy and yelling at him to let my brother go.. But he had laughed at me and pushed me away like I was nothing. I remember crying and yelling for him to let go of him.. He was my brother afterall, My twin brother. 

We shared the same birthday, the same blood and some of the same features. I don't even know what he looks like, other than we look alike.. But it doesn't help.. What is his clothing style? did he color his hair? What did he grow up to be? I never hear about him on the news, so he isn't an idol like me. What exactly happen to my brother. He can't be died, Can he? He has to be alive, He has to be. 

But In my head, there is a voice screaming that the kidnappers might have killed him by now. Or he could of died from hunger and lack of food. I cringed, cleanching my fist. I could picture him in a dark basement, scared out of his mind. 

He was the cry baby out of the two of us, the one who smiled the most, the only one who truly knew me the most out of the whole wide world. He used to hold my hand tightly whenever we where around strangers. When he got bullied and cried I used to yell at anybody that yelled at my brother first. And pushed the person down.. He was the whole reason why I became a Idol.. Because I had wanted to be a performer back then and my brother told me if I didn't become a performer of some other profession I really wanted, he would never forgive me.. 

And also.. because it would be easier to look for him, just in case he ever came to the concerts. and I always hopped he would come, but than it doesn't happen.

I wonder how he is doing? If he is still alive, I wonder if he is angry at me for not getting him back.. For not attacking the guy when I had a chance. Or if he missed me at all. I missed him, All the memories we had. We used to play sports togther, Pretend to be rockstars and build sand castles. After he disappered, I felt lonely, I felt I lost half my heart, Half everything. I didn't feel secure, safe.. 

We used to stand side by side and walk close togther, now it's just me, Now its just me, myself and I.. It used to be We and Us and now its just me.. Standing here without him.. Everything is so dark without him, He used to make me laugh without any problem. We were both Happy virus's. But he knew how to make me laugh when I felt down. I smile to the fans and  everyone close, so they don't worry about me. 

Whenever I see the picture of us in family houses, I always smile. Atleast they never cut him out of pictures Or else I would have cried my eyes my eyes out because or else I would have been hurt. Because he is my brother. And even if he is not next to me. I still feel his presance, like he is still alive. Or his he died, but just watching over me. NO! that can't be it. 

He is my brother, there is no way he would be died. But part of me feared that he would be died, by the time I find him.. I asked Chanhee's friemds, which surprise surprise they are Idols too. To help me find him. And even if they agreed.. Part of me was scared, Part of me feared the most. It's been so long since we saw eachother. Would we still be as close as we where when we where kids? Would he hate my guts, Cause I couldn't protect him? What about his smiles? Would it still hold that same spark like it did before. Would his smile still reach his eyes, His eyes where the same. But for some reason, his was more soft and looked like they where always smiling. 
 

Would he remember me? Like I remember him.. I mean how could i forget, we where six, old enough to remember memories and names. 

He used to hate it when ever I worried about him, but I can't help it. Sure I haven't seen my brother. But I still worry if his eating, if his drinking and if he is even alive. I hope he is... I still want to talk to him and just in case.. let him yell at me for not trying hard enough... 

I derserve it, for not protecting him. for not helping him and for not getting him back till now. I should looked harder that year, I should looked everywhere. 

Was he even in Seoul, Or in Korea at all. I even heard the news talking about seeing someone who looks like me walk around. 

What if he is died, would if they killed him.. I found myself jumping up from the sits as my members looked at me confused, we where on break from the fliming of the first episode, of "EXO next door." 

And I can't even focus, When ever I have to act angry.. I feel like my brother is laughing at my akwardness and its making me feel more and more distracted I can feel like my brother is here. But when I look behind me, it's only Sehun or Kai. I signed to myself and went back to the scene. I felt bad when the dircter had to stop just to give us a break. Because I again wasnt paying attenion at all. 

It's like the heavens are laughing at me, punishing me for pretneding everything is okay.. When sure as heck it isn't. I feel like my brother would laugh instead of taking me serious with my acting skills. That just how he is. 

He always had to find a joke in everything. And This is one of them. I look awkward, pretending to be angry. When I have nothing to be angry about. Instead, I'm broken. And I already feel like I lost half myself. I feel like I got cut in half. Half a brain, half a foot. You name it. I just don't feel like I'm myself anymore. 

Every time I look in the mirror it's worse. I can only hear my brothers laughter. And him saying that I'm failing so bad. And he should just take over. He is after all always making fun of me and saying that I at everything. And when I get annoyed at him, He smiles and says "I'm just kidding Brother." 

 I didn't notice my eyes where even watery until I felt tears roll down my cheek.. Just thinking about what it would be like to have him around all those years after we where 6, makes me cry.. We would have been inseparable, always together everywhere. I mean we where the first six years of our lives. I wouldn't have been so lonely, and sadden. If only he was around. Maybe I would have an easier time during school. Especially in Big Exams and test. He was always the best in academic, even at a very young age. I was more of the musician and sporty one. Never really loved to read, and write at all. I only liked puzzles that make you think. He was a good reader and loved to write. So I wonder what he ended up being when he got older. 

Maybe he became a businessman, A Writer or a lawyer. Or did he start working for the bank.. All those answers are unanswered and I may never know. Unless I see my brother again. 

When they called my name, to go back to the scene. I wiped the tears that had rolled down my cheek without me knowing and went over to the others. But not before looking at the shadows. As I thought I something moves. I signed and went back inside the house we where using.