Chapter 22

Hate Me Now, Love Me Later
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Chapter 22

SeungWan. SeungWan. SeungWan.

Irene covers her ears as that stupid name keeps on replaying and replaying over and over.

To no avail as the said name rewinds inside her head as well.

All the school seems to talk about is that new girl.

The school has been babbling nothing but SeungWan. All about SeungWan that Irene’s already informed that SeungWan is in the exact same year and in the exact same class as SeulGi’s.

Goddamnit.

If they aren’t chanting ‘SeungWan’, they’d be chanting ‘Wendy’. Which is basically the same girl and so Irene grunts in irritation.

But she doesn’t quite understand why she feels sudden anger and sudden ache when that stupid name comes from SeulGi’s mouth.

She has heard SeungWan’s name a thousand times every day but then why, with SeulGi just casually mentioning it for even only just once a day, is enough to ruin her own?

---

Irene glares at SeulGi. Well, SeulGi’s back. As the taller girl is preparing Irene’s things in the living room.

Irene glares not because SeulGi’s doing something wrong with her things, but because SeulGi is doing something else.

SeulGi’s humming.

“You sound stupid.” Irene suddenly says, making SeulGi jump from shock.

“Jesus! Irene!” SeulGi quickly turns to her, a hand on the former’s chest, “Don’t scare me like that!”

Irene disregards what SeulGi says, she points out instead, “You’re humming.”

SeulGi knits her eyebrows together, “Wha-? I am?”

“Yeah,” Irene fixes her things beside SeulGi, “And you sound stupid.”

“Stupidly good?” SeulGi lightly elbows Irene as she teases.

“Don’t get it too much in your head, bear.” Irene scoffs as she turns to SeulGi.

She shouldn’t have turned because her heart skips a beat.

For SeulGi was smiling.

Smiling at her.

How long has SeulGi last smiled? How long has SeulGi last smiled at her?

Irene swallows – when did it become hard to swallow?

She blinks her eyes as she unintentionally looks at SeulGi’s smiling lips.

How badly she wanted to keep that smile.

Irene’s about to answer back but she’s briefly cut off when SeulGi’s phone rings.

Taking Irene’s words, and SeulGi’s smile with it.

“Oh, I’ll just take that.” SeulGi excuses herself, and Irene’s left to look at the floor.

She hears SeulGi run to the other room where her phone is, and Irene wishes that her ears turn deaf for a moment.

For she hears that blasted name again, that wretched name from SeulGi’s mouth,

“SeungWan!”

There we go. Irene’s day hasn’t even started and it’s already ruined.

The sounds she hears from the other room are already faint, but maybe she pays a little too close that she’s able to hear SeulGi say that name.

Irene sighs as she continues to pack where SeulGi left. Throwing her things inside brashly.

She’s busy tossing stuff that she’s not able to notice SeulGi already coming back.

“Hey,” SeulGi grabs a notebook, “Not too hard, you might ruin your bag.”

Oh now, you care.

Irene lets go of the notebook and lets SeulGi do the packing.

It’s SeulGi’s job, right?

Irene crosses her arms as she continues to watch SeulGi earnestly prepare her things.

“There.” The blonde states proudly, “You’re ready to go!” SeulGi turns to Irene.

That same dorky smile already on her lips.

“Why are you so cheerful today?” Irene asks grimly, arms still crossed.

And SeulGi really might be dense because she does not sense Irene’s mood. For SeulGi replies, “I am? I’m always like this.”

“Yeah, right.” Irene ends the conversation.

“Well, I’ll be preparing for school now.” SeulGi adjusts Irene’s bag one last time before turning back to the older girl.

“Your breakfast is already in the dining table, by the way.” SeulGi starts walking, but not before she says, “Don’t skip breakfast, okay?”

Leaving Irene to chew on her lip,

For SeulGi unconsciously starts humming again as she runs up the stairs.

---

Irene goes out of the house to find SeulGi already by the car door. She walks closer and SeulGi starts to smile again.

Irene can’t help but clench a hand when she sees it.

“Ready to go to school, Princess?”

Princess.

That flimsy title she asks SeulGi to call her the first few days of SeulGi’s service.

Why is it hard to hear it now? When she’s the one who asked for it?

“Stop with the titles, Kang.” Irene says as she gets in the car.

“What? That’s what you want me to call you, right?” SeulGi gets inside as well.

Irene clicks her tongue, she doesn’t want to get mad this early in the morning,

“Just…” She raises a hand to SeulGi’s face, “Just stop it, okay? I’m not in the mood.”

Why isn’t she?

Irene turns to the window, but she does hear tapping on a phone.

She turns to her side to see SeulGi texting before looking at the latter’s side of the window as well.

Just since when did SeulGi start using her phone to type messages again?

Irene bites a clenched finger as she dismisses the thought and tries to focus on the scenery outside.

Because it’s somehow less painful to look at.

---

Irene instantly covers her ears the moment she sets foot in the school. She knows she’ll be hearing more of SeungWan, or Wendy, or whatever name that has.

.

What a strong word. She hasn’t even properly met this SeungWan yet.

Irene finds the littlest of comforts when she sees SuHo by the front gate, waiting for her. She immediately runs to him – leaving SeulGi behind once more.

“Good morning.” SuHo greets her as he carries some of her things.

“Hi.” Irene adjusts her bag by her shoulder, “Have you been waiting long?”

“Not really. I just arrived a while ago.”

Irene only nods.

She hears SuHo say, “Won’t you say goodbye to SeulGi?”

Irene looks at him, “What?”

“SeulGi’s still waiting by the gate.”

Irene wastes no time and turns back to look at what SuHo is talking about.

True enough, SeulGi is still by the gate.

Irene scrunches her forehead in confusion, “What the heck is she still doing there?”

And she finds the answer at once.

Irene grits her teeth once more as she finally knows the reason why SeulGi’s there.

It wasn’t because the blonde is waiting for Irene’s goodbye, it’s because SeulGi’s waiting for someone else.

Someone else that’s – you got it – SeungWan.

“Damn it!” Irene curses under her breath.

“Are you saying something, Irene?” SuHo tilts his head.

“None. I’m fine.” Irene turns her head back to face front, her anger already reaching her eyes,

“Let’s just keep going.”

---

Irene glares at SeulGi. Well, SeulGi’s back. As the blonde is busy chatting with this shorter girl on SeulGi’s usual table.

“Wow, you look nasty.”

Irene slowly turns to the girl beside her, “Shut up, SooYoung.”

“Why are you frowning?” ‘SooYoung’ puts a finger between Irene’s eyebrows, “And why are your eyebrows together?”

“Tch.” Irene swats the finger off her face, “I’m trying to study.”

She hears SooYoung laugh, SooYoung says, “You must be smart because I don’t see any notebooks on the table.”

Irene only sighs as she finally gets a notebook.

She tries to avert her attention to anything else but the sight of blonde hair. She’s busy pretending to read when she hears her friend speak – not in any way helping her, because then SooYoung just has to say,

“That ‘Wendy’ girl sure is very social.”

Irene weakly grunts as she hears that stupid name again, even coming from her very own friend’s mouth!

She doesn’t reply as she doesn’t want to prolong this kind of conversation, but SooYoung must really be as callous because then the taller girl continues,

“Wendy even made friends with that girl.”

Irene need not ask who SooYoung’s referring to, because she knows exactly who it is.

And SooYoung just keeps on adding salt to the already open-wound when she adds, “’SeulGi’ is her name, right? The loner girl?”

Still, Irene doesn’t reply.

“Oh, look!” SooYoung exclaims, “She could smile!”

It made Irene finally raise her head and place her eyes back to SeulGi’s table.

And it also made Irene clench on her notebook hard, for SooYoung's correct,

For she sees SeulGi laughing.

Laughing with SeungWan.

It surprisingly chews on Irene’s insides as she sees how SeulGi laughs, because SeulGi covers her face as she does.

And it might be because of one of their stupid inside jokes.

For SeulGi to cover all her face from laughing.

SeulGi covers her face as she laugh, and Irene can only wonder what SeungWan said to make her laugh like that.

Because Irene never saw SeulGi like that,

Because Irene never made SeulGi smile like that.

Irene unintentionally winces when she realizes it. She doesn’t know why, she just knows she did.

“Aww, she’s so pretty when she smiles like that!” SooYoung taps Irene as she points to the pair in front of them.

Irene closes her eyes once, before turning them back to where SooYoung’s pointing at.

Because why would Irene feel like this? Why should she feel like this?

Why should SeulGi smiling and laughing even bother Irene?

She saw SeulGi laugh and smile before, why is this any different?

But then Irene sees SeulGi laugh with SeungWan, and she has never seen SeulGi laugh like that. No, at least not with her.

And maybe that’s what’s bothering her.

When SeulGi smiles like that,

Because someone else made her smile like that.

---

Irene sees SeulGi waiting by the school gate that afternoon – just like how the latter would always wait for her.

Irene clutches onto SuHo tighter when she knows she’s nearer to reaching SeulGi.

For some reason, she doesn’t want to see SeulGi that day.

Too late.

SeulGi already turns to her direction – a stupid smile already on her lips.

Though Irene likes to fool herself that that stupid smile wavered even the tiniest bit when SeulGi sees SuHo.

“Hi, SeulGi.” He greets first.

“Hey, SuHo.” SeulGi manages to give a quick wave before hiding her hand behind her again.

Irene then suddenly holds on to SuHo stronger when SeulGi turns to her and says, “H-Hi, Irene.”

She only then briefly stares at SeulGi before looking back down to the ground.

She hears SeulGi clear , SeulGi says, “W-Will you go somewhere today?”

Irene looks at SuHo first then back to SeulGi, isn’t it already obvious?

“Yes.” Irene says firmly.

It was SeulGi’s turn to look at the ground, she says, “Oh.”

Irene continues to stare at SeulGi. SeulGi looks back up and it’s only then that Irene looks away again.

SeulGi says, “What time will you be home?”

Irene only rolls her eyes in annoyance, SeulGi’s stepping on the imaginary line again. She says, “I don’t know. Maybe 7? Why?”

Irene sees SeulGi nervously scratch the back of her head. SeulGi says, “I… I will be going somewhere. I just want to know what time you’ll be home so I could go home earlier than you and prepare before you come home.”

And this time, Irene was not able to roll her eyes. But she knows that she’s feeling more than annoyed.

She feels angered.

“And where are you going?” She sternly asks – questions.

“I-I,” SeulGi stutters, and Irene knows the blonde is nervous with how she looks at the ground while stammering, “I… I’ll just go somewhere really quick.”

“And where is that?” Irene only repeats, her fingers on SuHo’s arm only curling more.

“Just… Just in the mall.”

“And with who?” Irene continues with her interrogation.

SeulGi finally looks at her, and Irene knows it’s her who will not be able to maintain those stares.

“A friend.” SeulGi replies.

Irene feels more ticked when SeulGi didn’t answer her question properly. Irene knows who SeulGi will be with, so why can’t SeulGi just say so?!

“Should we get going, Irene?”

She only snaps from her thoughts when she feels SuHo lightly nudge her.

“Y-Yeah.” Irene brings herself closer to him as she prompts them to start walking already.

Irene doesn’t even as much look at SeulGi, but SuHo has the courtesy to at least bid farewell,

“Bye, SeulGi.”

She hears SeulGi says weakly, “Bye,”

And then Irene just has to hear SeulGi continue in a soft yet firm voice,

“Take care of her.”

She quickly turns to SeulGi – not minding anymore if she’s blushing or not.

And she meets SeulGi’s eyes.

She meets the panic in SeulGi’s eyes that she knows matches what’s in hers.

SeulGi then says a bit louder, but still a bit dishevelled, “I-I mean… T-Take care.”

Irene only warily nods as she dismisses the conversation. She loops her arms tighter – if that’s still possible – around SuHo’s arm, hoping to dismiss whatever it is burning inside her as well.

Just right after she does so, she sees SeulGi’s eyes instantly drop to their – hers and SuHo’s – entwined arms before SeulGi fully looks away with a bitten lip.

Irene sees no more of SeulGi as she soon starts leading SuHo outside the gate.

Though she hears another voice say,

“KkangSseul, let’s go?”

The urge to turn her head back is becoming stronger as she continues to walk away the school, and that urge wins over her as s

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iana013
#1
Chapter 1: re-reading 😍
Gomtokki_Hamsbun
#2
I'm here again to re-read this amazing story
lacielbleue #3
Still one of the best. 🩷
sunnyafternoon
#4
Chapter 11: i forgot how fun it is to read seulrene fic
gomtokkim
2112 streak #5
Rereadinggg
Oct_13_wen_03 34 streak #6
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
Physcsonosu #7
Chapter 30: Yay! Another work with chapters of angst and a snippet of fluff! It’s really well written, but god do I ing hate this story. Thanks for your hard work
seulreneislife #8
are u aware that this story has been converted to jenlisa on wattpad? at 700k reads too! wth
Se-ril
#9
This is my go-to Seulrene fic especially when I miss them. I first read this the night before my birthday. I couldn’t stop reading and feeling all the emotions; I cried, laughed, loved every chapter. I lost track of the time, so immersed in it. I was in Grade 9 that time, a teenager in 2016. Now, I’m in my 20s re-reading the story. I can’t believe it’s been that long, this masterpiece will forever have a place in my heart. Thank you, adamandeve! <3
democratits
#10
Chapter 30: It’s been a while since I last read a fic this good, everything is just well-balanced??!! It made me angry, giddy, sad, baffled, swooned, and literally any other emotions in the world. My head and heart hurts but I truly had a blast!1!

I’m seriously in awe of your writing, imagine my surprise when you said that you don’t even know seulrene or rv that well when you first started writing this because I found so many references and nods to the girls irl??? (you might incorporated it intentionally or unintentionally, either way i love it).

Anyway, I know it’s been 3(?) years since you last updated a seulrene fic, if you ever wanted to come back and continue writing about those two es and their three dorky+evil friends, please know that I (along with probably 9282828 others) really look forward to it. Thank you for writing, you’re a gift to the fandom! <3