Chapter 17

Could alcohol be the blame to my crying? I cried all night to the point where no more tears were coming out. I must have looked like a maniac to most people passing me by, but I guess I couldn’t really give two cares in the world. I could barely make out people’s faces by the time I was done crying. I had gotten back home, but it was already five o’clock in the morning. Luckily, my parents had already gone out, but it looked like Jin Hyuk’s car was still in the driveway.

What would he say if I were to walk in with red, puffy eyes? He would think something horrible happened and just to make it even better, I didn’t have my phone. What if he was calling me and was being openly worried when I was actually just standing outside looking like a fool? I took a deep breath and unlocked the door. It was quiet inside, but the light in the kitchen was on. I walked over and peeked over only to see my mother standing there.

“Soo Jin, is that you?” She turned around with a cup of tea in her hands. She looked at me with widened eyes when she noticed my face. “What is wrong? Are you okay?” She ran up to me and cupped my face with her free hand. “Goodness, you look like a mess. Where did you even go?”

“Ah, I went out with Jung Ah and cried. You know what alcohol does to you when you drink a little more than you can handle…” I said with sarcastic laughs. “Did Jin Hyuk not go to work?”

“No, he already left with your father. Those two were talking about business all night and decided to go see the company together.” My mother didn’t seem like she wanted to let go of our other conversation, but she did anyway. “Wash up and I’ll make you breakfast. Don’t you have some of your wedding planning today?”

How could I forget?

**

Eating across from my mother has never felt so awkward. She was staring at me while she sipped onto her tea, as if she’s never seen me in her life before. I don’t know what she was doing or thinking, but it was making me feel uncomfortable, so I put my utensils down and looked up at her with narrowed eyes.

“Why do you keep looking at me like that?” I asked finally.

My mother put her cup down and sighed. “What is going on with you? Something happened last night, huh?”

“What are you talking about? I already told you that I was with –”

“Ahn Soo Jin, please tell me a time where you’ve gone out and told me where you were and who you were with.” My mother sighed calmly, wrapping her fingers around the ceramic cup. “You’re lying to me. You weren’t with Jung Ah.”

“Why wouldn’t you believe me?” I asked in disbelief even though I was technically lying. “And now that I’m almost twenty-five years old, why would I need to let you and dad know where I am? Aren’t I old enough to be going out without having to tell you two?”

“You’re supposed to be getting married, Soo Jin. What are you doing going out and drinking your life away with…” My mother closed her eyes and sighed deeply. “Ahn Soo Jin, Se Hun called me and your father last night to notify us that you were with him. He said he saw the missed calls from us and was worried so he let us know where you were.”

My hands were now curled up into fists. How could that stupid gangster kid call my parents as if I was a child? And to think that he had the audacity to not get my consent?!

“Are you still in love with Se Hun?” My mother asked demandingly. “You know you’re not supposed to be seeing him anymore, right? What were you doing? You’re supposed to be getting married to Jin Hyuk, but you’re still with Se Hun?”

“You don’t know even know what happened, mom. You can’t just assume I walked with my own two feet into his house, okay? I was drunk with Baek Hyun and the others.” I scoffed angrily, trying to defend myself even though it really wasn’t that great. “I don’t know how I ended up there. They might have sent me there for all I know and for goodness sakes, mother, you and dad still contact him! How the hell am I supposed to feel about that?”

My mother looked at me shocked.

“Don’t tell me that I’m getting married or that what I’m doing is wrong when you know how I feel about that stupid gangster kid!” I groaned angrily, running my fingers through my damped hair. “And what am I supposed to do, mom? I don’t even get to see Jin Hyuk anymore. Ever since we’ve gotten back to Korea, all he does is goes on business meetings. I can’t even talk to him about the wedding. It’s as if he’s not even interested. He’s more interested in his job and I can’t help but feel like it’s weighing our relationship down! I want to be happy about him and his job because our future will become brighter, but I feel like I’m sitting in the shadows waiting and I can’t do that.” I felt tears prickling on my eyes. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for saying these things, but it’s how I feel. Just at least once or twice, I’d like to see my own fiancé so I could feel secure about myself and us…”

“Soo Jin, I’m –”

“Forget it, I don’t want to talk about it anymore.” I stood up from the table and left.

**

I stuffed my hands into my pockets as I made my way to Lu Han’s and Xiu Min’s café. They were busily making bubble tea and coffee for customers since it was already the afternoon. There were a lot of students there and some of them were even drooling over the two, who didn’t even seem to notice the girls. I walked in line and waited patiently, even though I was getting irritated with the girls commenting about them.

“Ah, they’re so handsome. Do you think I can get Lu Han’s number?”

“What are you talking about? You’ll never get their number.”

“But Xiu Min’s so cute when he smiles…He’s like a little baby…”

“You think they’ll ever notice us?”

“Lu Han is so pretty…”

“So is Xiu Min when he smiles…”

“But have you seen Lu Han smile? It’s like he’s a –.”

“Yeah, Lu Han rarely smiles, but when he does, he’s very handsome.” I sighed as I turned behind and stared at the two baffled girls. “Lu Han doesn’t like it when girls bother him, so don’t bother trying to ask for his number because he won’t give it to you. As for Xiu Min, he’ll politely decline, so it’s not even worth it.”

The two girls scoffed before turning away.

“Stupid…” I muttered under my breath before turning around only to see that I was the next one in line.

“Who are you calling stupid?” Lu Han raised an eyebrow at me.

“You.” I sighed, hearing the girls behind me gasp dramatically. “Your girlfriends behind me want your number.”

Lu Han glared at me before waving me over. “Come over here. I’ll make you something to drink after we get everyone here.”

“Shouldn’t you make me something first?” I snarled like a child. “I’m a VIP.”

“VIP can stand behind the counter and not get in our way…” Lu Han gestured, making me walk behind the counter to stand with him and Xiu Min.

“Oh, hello, Soo Jin!” Xiu Min smiled at me while waving his hand. “What are you doing here?”

“I’d like a bubble tea, but maybe I’ll go for a cup of coffee this time because Lu Han was being rather rude to me.” I said loudly for him to hear, but he ignored me.

As I waited behind the counter for the two to make drinks for the customers, most of the girls who were drooling over the guys were now glaring at me as if I’ve done something wrong. If only I had my phone, I could have kept myself occupied.

When the café died down, I was greeted by a mango bubble tea with a cute black straw. I looked up only to be met with Lu Han’s doe eyes.

“You poisoned it, didn’t you?” I narrowed my eyes at him playfully.

“I could have.” He shrugged nonchalantly. “But you don’t like coffee, so I thought I’d make you this since you had to wait. I gave you extra pearls if that makes up for waiting.”

“Thank you.” I said as I sipped onto the cold beverage, taking in its sweetness, forgetting for a second that he had probably poisoned it. “Ugh, it’s so refreshing! You didn’t poison it.”

“I should have when I had the chance.” He muttered like a kid.

“What are you doing here though? Are you supposed to meet up with Jung Ah soon or something?” Xiu Min asked as he walked towards me while wiping his hands onto a wet towel.

“I actually don’t have my phone. Can I use one of yours to call her?” I asked looking at the two. Lu Han gave me his. “Thanks.”

“Why are your eyes so red?” Lu Han pointed out with a raised eyebrow as he watched me text Jung Ah to meet met at Kang Hee’s office. “Were you crying?”

“No, my eyes have been so irritated lately.” I rolled my eyes before handing his phone back to him. I technically was lying. I was irritated with all the crying and things that have been happening to me.

“The guys said you were with them last night drinking at the club.” Lu Han raised an eyebrow at me.

“You were drinking with them and didn’t invite us?” Xiu Min sighed in disbelief. “Why do I suddenly feel so left out?”

“You shouldn’t feel left out at all.” I shook my head. “They ended up ditching me later that night anyway.”

Xiu Min pursed his lips. “Why? Where did they go?”

“I don’t know. They were acting like kids last night.” I shrugged before I realized what I had just said. I looked over at Lu Han suddenly. “Can I ask you something? I feel like I’ve been missing out a lot since I’ve moved to Canada.”

“What is it?” Lu Han asked crossing his arms.

“You’ll be honest with me, right?” I asked.

“I’m going to go grab coffee beans in the back…” Xiu Min said as he avoided eye contact with the two of us who paid him no attention. He left back quietly and closed the door behind him.

“What is it that you need?” He asked again.

“I’m sure you know why Se Hun broke up with me, but I just wanted to make sure that he didn’t break up with me because he cheated on me…” I bit my lip, wondering why the hell I would ask Lu Han this question out of everyone, but I guess he was better than Chan Yeol, Baek Hyun, and Jong In.

“What kind of question is that, Soo Jin? Are you just throwing things into your own mind?” Lu Han scoffed with an eye roll. “Why would Se Hun even think about cheating on you? Did you forget that Yoo Ra cheated on him and it took a toll on his freaking life? Do you think he’s that stupid to do something like that? He’d be contradicting himself.”

“How would I know? I feel like there are a lot of unanswered questions here.” I shook my head as I ran a hand through my hair.

“Like what? What more is there to it? Se Hun told you why he broke up with you, Soo Jin. What don’t you believe?” His words were like venom and they stung with every word he spat.

“Then why the hell is it that I ran into him yesterday only to find out that he had a child? Don’t you think that’s an unanswered question?” I raised my voice angrily, feeling my face suddenly heating up. “That child had to at least be four or five years old and that would have meant that he had slept with someone during the time we were together or were broken up! It wouldn’t make sense then!”

Lu Han was now staring at me as if I was stupid and I’m sure he was probably thinking that, but I had every reason to be upset. It just made sense, didn’t it? Se Hun had to have broken up with me because he had a child with another girl and that means he messed up and cheated on me.

“You mean, you met Jin Guk?” Lu Han’s voice was now softer, as if he felt bad that he had raised his voice at me earlier. “H-How did you manage to meet Jin Guk? He’s supposed to be in the hospital…”

“What are you talking about? He was running around in the rain and was looking for Se Hun and that’s –” My mouth suddenly fell ajar. He was hiding something from me. “Lu Han, I thought you’d be honest with me.”

“How am I not being honest with you?” He looked at me sternly.

“You knew about Jin Guk the whole time and you never said a word until I brought it up and what is this with you acting like it’s such a big deal that I’ve met him?” I didn’t know what to think anymore. “And why would he be in the hospital?”

“Jin Guk’s sick.” Xiu Min walked out from the back with the coffee beans in his hands. “Don’t you know he’s getting dialysis treatment because his kidneys are weak?”

“Xiu Min…” Lu Han pinched the bridge of his nose irritated. “I thought we already talked about how this should be kept on the down low…”

“Oh, I completely forgot about that…” Xiu Min bit his lips together. “Sorry… I heard you say he was in the hospital, so I thought you were going to tell her anyway…”

“What do you mean Jin Guk’s sick?” I asked looking at the two of them, but Xiu Min had his back turned to us already.

“Se Hun must’ve taken him out for some fresh air or something, but he practically lives in the hospital to get dialysis treatment for his kidneys.” Lu Han sighed, looking away from me with guilt written all over. “You didn’t hear any of this from us.”

I looked at the two of them without really saying anything. I had to take this all in even if it wasn’t as much information. Not only was I upset that Lu Han was still trying to keep something from me, but then he didn’t deny the fact that Jin Guk was Se Hun’s kid. Se Hun had to have cheated on me. I suddenly threw my hands out in front of Lu Han.

“What?” He looked at me confused.

“Give me the address to where Jin Guk is.”

Author's Note: This is my birthday gift to you all for being so patient and loving! By the way, I thought I'd let you all know,the concert was amazing and Se Hun was so handsome. Everyone is right when they say they look way better in person. How is that even possible? I don't know. He was sick though, but he at least was still giving it his all. By the way, Chanyeol is actually my bias, so I was more focused on him, but the rest of the members were really handsome and funny. I even took a picture next to their van. Haha. They were already in the venue, sadly. But hey! I have a lot of videos of them, but I'll think about posting them another day. I've been busy and will be for awhile. I'll most likely post them on my instagram or maybe even my twitter. Now, I'm out to go celebrate my 21st! Have a wonderful morning/night. Enjoy.

This will be later tonight... lol.